The Widow

by K.L. Slater

Genres: Thrillers; Crime Fiction; Psychological Thrillers; Suspense

Synopsis

My husband was not a monster. No matter what they say…

The day my husband, Michael, stepped in front of a lorry after being questioned by the police, my world fell apart. He was devoted to me and our six-year-old daughter. But they’d connected him to the disappearance of a young mother from our tiny village.

Now I stand at Michael’s funeral, clutching my little girl’s hand, with tears in my eyes as I insist to all our friends that he died an innocent man. Yet the questions have started, and nothing I say will stop them digging for the truth.

But none of them can read the secrets in my heart, or know about the phone I found hidden in his toolbox…

I’m determined that my daughter will not remember her father as a monster. I will erase any hint of wrongdoing in this house whatever the cost.

Because to keep my daughter safe, the last thing I need is for people to start looking at me…

A completely gripping psychological thriller from the author of the number one bestseller The Marriage. If you like Gone Girl, The Girl on The Train and The Wife Between Us then you will love The Widow.

What everyone is saying about K.L. Slater:

‘I want to take it and scream from the rooftops. I want to make everyone I know read a copy. I want to knock on doors and leave this book in mailboxes… Enthralling, fast-paced and dark… I read this one into the night, I left the book open on my bed so I could try and absorb more as I slept… Must-read.’ Clues and Reviews, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘This book was AMAZING… the fact that ANYONE can write this well is just shocking. There were seriously like four twists at the end, all of which left me with my jaw on the floor… Holy crap. I was stunned… PLEASE read this. I’m begging.’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘What a book!! Oh my word, what a rollercoaster ride of emotions that was… Without a doubt an absolutely spectacular read that has so far blown the other books I’ve recently read out of the water… I LOVED it’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘OMG THIS BOOK IS AMAZING. I was hooked from the first page, I devoured this book. The tension was palpable and chilling… mind blowing… One of the best books I have read.’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Literally left me lost for words… It has blown my mind. Seriously, obliterated it. It is mind-numbingly brilliant. Honestly, if you want twisted, they don’t come more twisted than this.’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘I was totally hooked and addicted… I binge read the book in the course of a day as I was just desperate to know how the story ended.’ Ginger Book Geek, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Oh. My. Goodness…

Release date: November 12, 2021

Publisher: Bookouture

Print pages: 350

Sample

KATE

I stood at the edge of the field, flanked by two uniformed police officers. We were up at the Wadebridge estate, three acres of fields with a main house with a large garden and a row of five stone cottages that stood on the edge of the village of Lynwick.

The place my husband, Michael, had worked for more than twenty years.

A sheet of freezing rain arrowed down the back of my neck, trickling down my spine. My jeans were already soaked through and the raindrops dripped from the tip of my nose and my earlobes. I thought longingly of home, our house being just a fifteen-minute walk from here. The warmth of the log burner, curtains closed against the weather, and Tansy snuggled into my side as we read The Ickabog together for the umpteenth time this week.

In front of me was a different scene. My new reality. White tarpaulin sheets stretched high and wide across the middle section of the field, stark and clinical against the sludge and the moody skies.

Behind the screen, I could hear the guttural roar of the yellow digger, its dull black bucket plunging into the depths, forcing the earth to reveal its grim secrets. Powerful spotlights illuminated the area of police interest and the wide circle of land around it. The smell of damp, clogged earth stuck in my nostrils and throat, and I fought the urge to gag.

I turned away from the field to look at the people who were standing along the track – a public right of way that ran directly behind the row of cottages. They meandered in and out of their small, curious groups, standing and chatting for a minute or two before moving on. I recognised most of the faces that stared boldly back at me without acknowledgement. Locals who knew exactly what was happening here. People I used to consider friends and acquaintances who now found themselves unable to express their condolences. People we had lived peacefully alongside for years.

Now they’d braved the elements to come and watch our lives crumble as the drama unfolded, the small points of light cast from their phones dancing like sprites in the gloom.

Behind me: the press. The constant flashes from the cameras were distracting, and every few seconds I’d hear my name being called with a jarring, unwanted familiarity.

‘Kate! Do you know what they’re going to find here?’

‘Who’s looking after your daughter, Kate? Where’s Tansy?’

My life was now an open book to these people, a free-for-all. I was no longer a human being. In their eyes I was subject matter. I was a headline, the star of a grim and gory story everyone wanted to read.

I didn’t look their way. I didn’t give any sign at all that I heard them calling out. I pulled up the collar of my old waxed jacket and shoved my bare hands into the pockets. The fingers of my right hand closed around a soft ball and my heart squeezed. Tansy’s woollen mittens, left in my pocket from a few weeks ago, when we’d walked over here to bring her daddy his sandwiches and to forage for some yarrow for her flower press.

Stomach acid bubbled up into my throat and I closed my eyes against what was to come, what my six-year-old daughter would have to face.

‘Mrs Shaw? Daily Mail,’ a man’s voice called out, closer than the others. He sounded friendly, sympathetic. ‘Did you have any clue at all about what your husband did? We can help you tell your side of the story. Put an end to all the speculation. What do you say?’

I didn’t turn around. The rain pelted down harder, the biting wind scalding my cheeks, but I welcomed the discomfort. The sound of the digger filled my head with its relentless drone, every second bringing me closer to facing the horror that I dreaded and they all craved.

Then … a splutter, the powering-down of an engine and the noise suddenly stopped.

For a moment or two there was perfect silence. Then someone shouted from behind the tarpaulin sheet, a sound of alarm.

The gaggle of headline-hungry reporters behind me erupted, surged forward. Cameras flashed so rapidly it almost felt like daylight. Voices rose in unison, all shouting my name and vying for attention. Demanding answers.

Several officers formed a loose chain behind us to restrain the press.

‘What’s happened?’ I whispered hoarsely to my escorts. ‘Does this mean they’ve found something?’

Neither of the officers responded.

A few feet away, DI Price talked animatedly on her phone in a low, confidential voice. Before I could get her attention, she ended the call and dashed behind the screen. My sinuses were blocked solid and I had to drag air in through my mouth.

A hum of chatter rose up. ‘Have they found something?’ a man shouted from the track. ‘Is it human remains?’

The radio of the officer to my right crackled and he stepped away to speak into it. Another spurt of crackling, but I couldn’t decipher what was being said. I found myself praying silently: Please God, don’t let them have found her.

But the air seemed drenched with a dark foreboding, and I knew it would be bad. Very bad.

The officer with the radio returned and whispered something to his colleague. The second man gave a low whistle. ‘Jeez,’ he said, shaking his head, clearly appalled.

‘What is it? What have they found?’ A wave of panic shunted up and gathered in my chest, choking me like smoke. ‘I have a right to know.’

The officers looked at each other, and then one of them turned to me, his face impassive.

‘You’ll find out soon enough, Mrs Shaw. Don’t you worry about that,’ he said coldly, glancing at the reporters behind him. ‘I can guarantee that by tomorrow morning, the entire country will be talking about it.’

KATE

The black sky lit up with whirls of dazzling orange, red and gold as the firework grand finale galloped toward its stunning crescendo.

I felt Michael slide his arm around my shoulders as we stared up at the night sky, and I allowed my head to fall against him.

The crowd oohed and aahed, everyone in sync as if they’d been rehearsing. My wellies were stuck fast in the mud and my feet felt like blocks of ice. But when I looked down at Tansy’s awestruck little face, I wished I could preserve her expression forever. I felt the weight of my phone in my pocket but decided against taking a flash photograph and spoiling the moment. I’d taken so many photos on my phone, like it might slow down this life we all lived at breakneck speed. It didn’t work. This year, time was rushing on like a runaway freight train. I’d go old-school instead tonight and file the memory away in my mind.

Due to essential work being carried out in the village, the parish council had combined the Halloween/Guy Fawkes night events and scheduled them early this year. Needless to say, it hadn’t gone down well with the village stalwarts. But tonight, everyone had forgotten the inconvenience and we’d had a great celebration.

It seemed just weeks since we were strawberry-picking at a day out at a local fruit farm, and now here we were in October. Tansy had turned six this summer too, and she seemed to grow taller by the day. Taller and smarter and so caring. As I watched her at the centre of her group of little friends, dressed in her cute little witch outfit and making sure nobody stepped too close to the firework launch area, I swore there were times she had a wiser head on her shoulders than I had.

‘I’ll go and get us a coffee,’ Michael whispered in my ear, and I smiled and nodded. Just what I needed to warm me up on this cold October night.

I looked around me at the sizeable crowd on the field. I knew every face, every name of every person I could see, and that was why I loved village life. After so many years feeling like I didn’t fit in, I felt truly at the centre of our little community here in Lynwick.

‘Mum, look … the fountains!’ Tansy pushed up the brim of her witch’s hat, watching in awe as cascades of colour exploded, splitting the dark sky. ‘They’re beautiful!’

Before I could answer, someone tapped my right shoulder. I spun around, and my best friend, Donna, pressed her masked face close to me from my left-hand side. ‘Boo!’ she hissed with delight when I jumped.

‘Donna, honestly!’ She was like a big kid herself half the time. Her reddish-brown hair seemed to glow in the warm light of the nearby bonfire as she whipped off the hag’s mask. Her striking dark eyes were sparkling with mischief, and with the cute sprinkling of freckles over her nose, I always thought she looked younger than her thirty-eight years.

‘Great display, isn’t it?’ She regarded the lit sky, raising her voice amid the pops and bangs of the fireworks. We stood for a minute or so gazing upwards, until Michael appeared with Donna’s husband, Paul, and handed us each a coffee in a cardboard cup.

Paul was tall and skinny, with the sort of metabolism that allowed him to eat pretty much what he wanted without exercising. As a national sales manager for a kitchen company, he spent most of his time driving around the country. At six foot exactly, Michael was slightly shorter than Paul, but was more muscular, with wide shoulders and strong legs.

‘I was trying to get Mike to come for a drink while you two lovely ladies looked after the kids,’ Paul said, unable to keep the grin off his face. He loved winding me up, but he only managed to get me occasionally. These days, most of his silly comments were like water off a duck’s back.

I looked at Michael and he winked at me. ‘Don’t worry, I’ve told him I’m strictly on dad duties tonight. I’ve even turned my phone off.’

It was music to my ears. Michael managed a local estate, and even when he was off duty, there always seemed to be some catastrophe that needed dealing with. I smiled and kissed his cheek.

‘Maybe I’ll turn it off more often if that’s your response.’ He grinned, sipping his drink. I laughed, but his comment did make me think. I probably wasn’t as affectionate with him as I used to be.

‘The kids are loving it,’ I said, ignoring the thought. I nodded to Tansy and Ellie, who was Donna’s daughter and Tansy’s best friend. The girls, or the purple witch and the orange witch, as they called themselves tonight, had broken away from the main group of girls now. They had their witchy heads together, laughing as they unwrapped the toffee apples Paul had pulled out of his jacket pocket like rabbits from a hat. Suddenly Tansy let out a howl of protest as Ellie snatched her toffee apple away and pushed her own into Tansy’s hand.

‘You gave Tansy the biggest one, Daddy.’ Ellie scowled, turning her back to finish unwrapping it. I waited for Paul or Donna to pull her up, but nothing was said.

Donna and I had been pregnant together, and so the girls were more like twins. They were in the same class at school, and went to drama and dance club together on Saturday mornings. But while Tansy was generous and liked to share, I couldn’t help but feel that Ellie was the opposite. Whether it was at school or their club, her small face was always watchful, seeing who had what and judging if she was missing out. Woe betide us all if she found she was.

The final explosions of vibrant colour died away, and there was the inevitable disappointed groan from the crowd.

‘Fancy a go on the hook-a-duck stall before it closes?’ Michael asked, and the girls squealed in excitement.

‘Let’s see which dad wins a prize first, eh?’ Paul, ever the competitive one, broke into a run towards the handful of pop-up stalls near the entrance to the event.

As the crowd began to break up, Donna squeezed my arm and leaned in closer. ‘Those two seem to finally be mending broken bridges.’

I nodded, pleased she’d noticed. I’d asked Michael to make more of an effort with Paul when we were together with the girls. It had felt so awkward when they wouldn’t even look at each other in the months following Paul returning to Donna after he’d briefly left her for another woman. I knew it was a big ask, but Michael had obliged ‘for your and Tansy’s sakes’ and I loved him all the more for it.

‘Listen,’ Donna said, dropping her voice even though we were alone. ‘Is there any chance you could pick Ellie up from school tomorrow? Paul’s home, but he’s going to cover for me at the café.’ Donna owned a popular vintage tea room in the centre of the village. Occasionally, when she was pushed, Paul had been known to don an apron and help out there. She gave me a meaningful look. ‘There’s some … stuff I need to check on while he’s home, if you know what I mean.’

‘Oh, I see.’ My heart sank. I knew exactly what her coded words meant. She obviously suspected he was up to something yet again with another woman on his travels, and she wanted to go through his work diary, receipts log and laptop. She did this every so often, and she sometimes found a clue that gave her sleepless nights. Michael had been known to call Paul ‘the love rat’ behind his back. Gone were the days when I’d tried to convince Donna to demand better of him. Criticism of Paul always fell on deaf ears but it pained me to see her hurt and confusion yet again.

‘Kate?’ She stared, waiting for an answer. ‘Is that OK?’

‘Yes, sorry, no problem. She can stay for tea.’ I took a sip of the tepid, bitter coffee. ‘I’ll drop her back at yours about six, if that suits?’

A shadow passed over her face. ‘You will remember, won’t you? There’s nobody else to pick her up if you forget, and—’

‘Donna, it’s fine. I’ll be there.’

The panic had settled into the creases of her mouth. It was totally understandable after what had happened to her as a kid, but it never seemed to lessen no matter how much time passed. Ellie was a child who hated being alone even for short periods, and I could see why. Donna had inadvertently infected her with her own fear.

‘Perfect!’ Her face brightened. ‘Thanks, love.’

At that moment, Michael, Paul and the girls reappeared. ‘Stalls are already closing up,’ Michael said to disappointed groans from Tansy and Ellie.

‘Never mind. It’s not long until the Christmas lights turn-on. They’ll all be back then and you can—’

A low, admiring whistle from Paul interrupted me, and we all followed his goggle-eyed stare. My heart sank when I spotted the object of his curiosity. I felt both sad and outraged on Donna’s behalf, but as usual, her vitriol was reserved for the recipient of her husband’s interest rather than Paul himself.

‘Who invited her?’ she seethed.

It was Zuzana Baros, the young, glamorous single mum who was a relative newcomer to the village and who had instantly got all the tongues wagging. She’d met Irene Wadebridge, Michael’s boss, while working for the agency Irene used for her home help. They’d hit it off quickly, and Irene had offered her a job. ‘She was looking for a permanent post and I was sick of having half a dozen different people coming here from the agency,’ she told me.

‘She’s always up at the house,’ Michael had remarked when I told him about it. ‘One of Irene’s tenants is moving out and she says she’s going to offer the cottage to Suzy to rent.’

Then Tansy had mentioned that a new boy had started in her class – Aleks, who’d come over from Poland. Miss Monsall, her teacher, had assigned her as his class buddy. One day at the end of school when Tansy walked over to me, I saw a boy with black hair pointing at us.

His mum came over to introduce herself. ‘I am Zuzana … Suzy … and I wanted to just say thank you to your daughter for helping Aleks, for being kind.’ She looked down expectantly at him.

‘Thank you, Tansy,’ Aleks said shyly.

I wasn’t sure what I’d expected, but Suzy was young – in her mid-twenties, making me feel ancient in my mid-thirties – and quite stunning by anyone’s measure. I knew it was unfair of me, but I felt a frisson of annoyance that Michael would see her a lot while working. She seemed very nice, though, and told me she’d moved over to the UK from Poland a while ago hoping to make a new life here.

‘Aleks and I were stuck in temporary accommodation and I found most jobs were for low pay and very long hours. But there is a big Polish community in the East Midlands and I got lots of advice online. Someone mentioned agency work, and I signed on and they sent me to help Irene. Now we have a nice new life at Wadebridge. Irene rescued us!’

That had been a while ago now, and I’d kept meaning to invite her to one of our village events, but I’d never really had a chance. I only seemed to see her at a distance.

She walked past us now, clasping Aleks’s hand tightly and leaving behind a fragrant cloud of floral perfume.

‘Jeez, not exactly appropriate attire for a few fireworks in a muddy field,’ Donna remarked spitefully as she took in the younger woman’s outfit.

Suzy was tall and slender, the perfect frame for the skinny jeans she’d paired with striking over-the-knee high-heeled boots. She wore a short faux-fur zipped jacket and her long blonde hair looked impressively sleek and unaffected by the damp air – unlike my own mop, which had already begun to frizz out of its restraining bobble, framing my face like a fuzzy dark halo. She wore a stylish pair of glittery horns on a headband in a nod to the occasion.

‘To be fair, if I had a figure like her, I’d probably have worn the exact same thing,’ I said wistfully, patting down my hair. I dropped my voice. ‘Give her a chance, Donna, she’s only been here a few months.’ I called out loudly, ‘Suzy!’

She stopped and turned, surprised to hear her name. ‘Oh, Kate … and Michael, hi!’ She flashed her perfect white smile.

‘I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Paul Thatcher.’ Paul stepped in front of us and held out his hand, and Suzy took it. ‘Anything you need, just let me … or Donna know, yeah?’ It was painfully obvious he could hardly keep his eyes off her. Suzy faltered as Donna glared at her, and pulled her hand away.

Donna had never been very good at keeping her true feelings off her face. She’d taken an instant dislike to Suzy the first time she’d seen her outside school and had made it clear that she didn’t want to include her in our mums’ meet-ups for coffee each week. Now, with Paul so obviously taken with her, her eyes had narrowed to slits.

‘Hi, Count Aleks!’ I smiled at Suzy’s son, trying to crack the ice. Aleks was tall for his age and with his pale skin and black hair, made an impressive vampire complete with black cloak and bloody dribbles at the corner of his mouth. He had equally dark eyes that really didn’t want to meet mine at this precise moment. His lips twitched and he took a step closer to his mum.

‘Say hi to Kate,’ Suzy prompted him.

‘Hello,’ he murmured.

‘We’re having a Macmillan coffee morning next Wednesday,’ I said. ‘Be great if you could come. It’s at Donna’s tea room, the Larder. You know it?’

‘Yes … I’ve been meaning to pop in. It looks so nice and welcoming.’ She gave a hesitant smile.

Donna folded her arms and looked away. I wanted to nudge her so she’d stop acting so rudely, but Suzy would have spotted the gesture. I felt awkward stuck between the two of them.

‘Well, you’d be very welcome,’ I added, glancing at Donna and hoping she got the hint. No such luck.

‘Oh, that’s kind,’ Suzy said. ‘I … I might do, thank you, Kate.’

‘Everyone is welcome!’ Paul boomed brightly, as if he’d got something to do with the organisation of the coffee morning.

Suzy glanced at Donna’s stony expression and patted Aleks’s head in its red wool hat.

‘Well, we’d better get going. Someone is excited to have some …’ She hesitated, and grimaced. ‘… mushy peas? Did I get that right? I have to say, it sounds pretty revolting!’

‘Oh yes, it’s the law that you have to eat mushy peas on Bonfire Night.’ I laughed.

‘Ha! We will report back what we think. Bye, Kate, Michael … and Paul.’ She glanced again at Donna’s blank face. ‘See you!’

‘Not if I see you first,’ Donna murmured as Suzy walked away, her narrowed eyes tracking up from the other woman’s heels to her long fair hair.

‘Well, she brightens the place up a bit, doesn’t she!’ Paul said cheerfully to Michael. ‘Bit of eye candy for you while you’re toiling away up at Wadebridge, mate.’

‘Paul! Have some respect, for goodness’ sake.’ I squeezed Donna’s arm, aware that her eyes were glistening.

He didn’t respond, too interested in watching Suzy disappear into the crowd. ‘Very nice indeed.’

‘Give it a rest, eh?’ Michael growled, eyeing Donna’s crestfallen expression. Ellie moved closer to her mum.

‘Just a joke! Christ, don’t take yourself so seriously, man.’ Paul grabbed Donna and pulled her to him. ‘Why would I be interested in her when I’ve got a woman like this?’

Donna allowed herself to be kissed and hugged like a rag doll, but didn’t respond.

‘Come on,’ Michael said stiffly, taking Tansy’s hand. ‘Time for us to get off home, Kate.’

I wasn’t going to argue with that. We said our goodbyes and left the field. Michael was as angry with Paul as I’d ever seen him.

‘That’s it, Kate. I’m done with him,’ he fumed as Tansy skipped ahead of us. ‘If Donna wants to be disrespected like that with her daughter watching, then that’s her lookout. But I’m not standing by and letting our daughter witness it.’

‘I feel so sorry for Donna, but I could shake her at the same time,’ I agreed. ‘He’s awful. And Suzy looked uncomfortable, too.’ While all that was true, part of me understood that after what Donna had been through as a kid, Paul, dreadful as he was, was something consistent for Donna to cling to.

Irene Wadebridge was in her mid-seventies, a generous, gregarious woman who played a big part in our lives. Her land stood on the outskirts of the village. As well as the large detached main house, where Irene lived alone, there was a row of five stone cottages. Michael had started working there young, learning the ropes under Amos, Irene’s husband. When Amos had died ten years ago, she’d appointed Michael as her property and land manager, and he’d been there ever since.

I worked as a temporary teaching assistant at the local village school, covering for sickness and listening to the children read mostly. Over the last year, the school had called on me to do more hours, which suited me as we needed the money. There was a restructuring taking place in spring next year and I was hopeful the additional hours might become permanent. Before Suzy Baros had become Irene’s home help, I’d always tried to help Irene out with a few light cleaning and caring tasks in addition to my school work. I still collected her prescribed medication from the pharmacy in town and filled up her tablet boxes, each clearly marked with the day of the week. She was sharp as a tack mentally, but thanks to arthritis and sciatica, she often struggled with her mobility and needed a bit of assistance here and there.

Michael and I weren’t exactly hard up, but we weren’t awash with cash like Donna and Paul seemed to be. The holidays abroad and frequent meals out they took for granted were beyond our means most of the time. Ellie came to us for a sleepover on alternate weekends, and Donna and Paul would often have dinner at an expensive restaurant in the city, though it was a sore point with Paul that Donna wouldn’t leave Ellie for more than one night, even with us. When it was our turn for a free night, we usually plumped for a romantic meal and movie at home.

Donna knew we hadn’t got much money spare, and to give her credit, she never flaunted the fact that they were well off, but Paul liked to. It had been Michael who’d told Donna that Paul was having an affair, and Paul had never forgiven him. He’d do anything to get at Michael.

It had always been well known in the village that Paul had a wandering eye. Over the years, his indiscretions had often been public knowledge, though most of them had been casual dalliances. Then one day three years ago, Michael had travelled out of town to see an important supplier at an upmarket hotel and had stumbled upon Paul and a young woman in the restaurant. Paul had his back to Michael and didn’t see him, but as Michael walked by, he’d heard Paul charging the wine to ‘our’ room. On his return, he’d told Donna what he’d seen, and that was the end of any goodwill between the two men.

Paul had left Donna and Ellie and moved in with the young woman, who turned out to be his secretary. I’d nursed Donna through her heartbreak, and after about six months, I really thought she’d begun to turn a corner. Until Paul realised the grass wasn’t greener after all. Donna had taken him back almost instantly, no questions asked. Her relief at being a family again was almost palpable.

Michael had really liked Paul as a friend, and they’d always got on well, but he had no patience with Paul’s infidelity. ‘What a prat,’ he had raged when Paul left Donna. ‘I’ve told him to his face he’s an idiot, and do you know what he said? “I know, but I can’t help it. It’s not my head doing the thinking right now.” He needs to keep it in his trousers.’ After that, he had cut back on the amount of time he spent alone in Paul’s company.

I loved it that Michael was such a devoted family man. He wasn’t always out at the pub or the gym like Paul, and provided he didn’t have to work, our weekends were spent together, just the three of us. It was the childhood I wanted for Tansy after my own turbulent and insecure upbringing. It was probably the most important goal in my life.

Donna took a different approach. Rather than demand better of Paul, she preferred to expend a great deal of energy keeping a watchful eye on him, which included making sure he stayed. . .