The Road to Heaven

Book 3: The Allendale Four

by Angel Lawson

Genres: Contemporary Romance; New Adult Romance; YA Romance

Synopsis

What happens when the road of love is filled with detours?

Or giant potholes and washed out bridges.
I had the Allendale Four.
Had them.
In my heart. In my bed.
And then…I lost them.

But our bonds are linked and when one of the boys needs me, I’m there. We’re there and that’s when the road gets bumpier than ever before.

Can we navigate our way back together? And what happens if not everyone wants to return?

#whychoose

Release date: September 4, 2018

Publisher: Independently published

Print pages: 266

Sample

Chapter 1

The trailer door slammed just as I pulled on my rubber gloves. I used my foot and spun the chair around, and the man slumping into the seat offered me a gruff, “Morning.”

An assistant followed, shoving a paper coffee cup in his hands while scanning the daily schedule. My assistant, Lea, hovered nearby with tools in her hands. To the untrained eye, they looked a little like torture devices.

“Good morning, RJ,” I said, looking down at the young actor. Despite the tired circles under his eyes, he was still strikingly handsome. “You’re looking chipper today.”

“These 5 a.m. wakeup calls are going to kill me.” His eyes flickered shut, like he was trying to block me and everyone else out.

“You’re twenty years old, lack of sleep won’t kill you. Partying all night at the Paper Plane may do it, though.”

He cracked an eye, giving me a peek of the brilliant blue that helped him land an agent in the first place. “How do you know I was at Paper Plane?”

I shook my head and prepped his face with toner. Paper Plane was a local bar--which RJ was too young to go to, but I supposed rules were bent for celebrities. “I learned a long time ago that it’s best to check your social media first thing in the morning to make sure no one is talking about you—or if they are, that it’s not going to destroy your life.”

He perked up a little and his assistant handed him one of the three phones he carried for various aspects of his job. His thumb quickly scrolled down the photos, pausing on one of him huddled in the corner with a faceless blonde. Our eyes met in the large mirror in front of us, in the narrow slot not piled high with makeup and supplies. “Shit.”

“Sorry,” I said, feeling a mixture of genuine empathy for him along with a heavy dose of the fact he should know better. I felt a million years older than this kid. Wiser. Yet he was the one making a hundred thousand dollars an episode, while I got paid to turn him into a monster every week. 

RJ mumbled a few directions at his assistant—damage control—I got it. I’d been there, just on a much less-public level. I reached out to grab a tin of glue and a brush and started on my efforts to turn this handsome kid into a terrifying creature. 

I’d slathered on the first coat when he eyed me and asked, “How could a woman with a name like Heaven know anything about social media scandal?”

I snorted. “Trust me, I know more than you’d think.”

“Explain.”

“A high school prank gone wrong,” I tell him, glancing at my assistant, Lea. She knew the story. I told her everything one night over too many margaritas and a binge watch of Buffy The Vampire Slayer. “But that’s a really long story and it happened a really long time ago. Trust me, everything about that period of my life is in the past.” I caught my reflection in the mirror, looking for the girl I used to be. Other than faint scars on my arms and familiar blue eyes, I could barely find her.

“How long am I going to be in this chair?” RJ asked.

His assistant looked at the clock. “Two hours.”

His bright eyes met mine again in the mirror. “I’ve got time, Heaven Reeves, I want to hear that story.”

* * *

Two hours later, RJ no longer looked like a handsome TV star but like a creature from a demonic dimension. He was on a weekly TV show, Creature Feature, which was about a group of best friends that jumped from one alternate reality to the other, fighting demons and saving the world. Part X-Files, part Supernatural, it unsurprisingly became the breakout hit of the season. And by some crazy mixture of fate and luck, I’d secured the job of head makeup person.

I couldn’t see RJ’s actual expression under the gobs of liquid latex and paint, but his assistant stopped typing on her phone about fifteen minutes into my story. Lea, with her non-committal expression and purple-streaked hair, patiently handed me my supplies while I spilled the sordid details. Everything. Justin and the favor gone tragically, socially, wrong. Spencer and his harassment. The bullying. I left out the self-harm but I didn’t forget the Allendale Four. How could I?

“This sounds like a TV show,” RJ said. “Why haven’t they made this into a TV show? One girl, four guys, all in love with one another. There’s danger, social commentary, mental health issues, and an incredible romance.”

“It’s not a story anyone would ever want to put on TV,” I said, fussing with a scale on RJ’s forehead that wouldn’t stay down the way I wanted. I reached for my superglue.

“Why? Because of the polyandry lifestyle?” Lea asked. “It’s not so taboo anymore.”

“There’s that, although in my experience it’s hard for people to understand the complexity of that relationship, but also—” I was interrupted by a bang on the door, announcing that it was time for RJ to get on set. I whipped off the apron covering his clothes and pushed down the scale one more time.

“Also, what?” he said, facing me. He looked terrifying and I couldn’t help but smile.

“My story doesn’t have a happy ending, and who wants to watch a show like that?”

 

 

Chapter 2

 

“This is a bad idea.”

“Heaven, how long has it actually been since you’ve gone on a date?” Lea asked as we walked down the street. We were in the trendy part of town—yes, Allendale had a trendy part of town now—something that had changed while I was away at school.

Allendale had always been a small but thriving city. We had a university and hospital and those both provided jobs for many people in the town. I went away for college and then for art school. While I was gone, Hollywood took notice of the quaint downtown area, the beach not too far away, and all the things they needed for TV shows and movies. They set up shop, which was perfect timing for my specialty in makeup/FX design. Creature Feature picked Allendale for the shooting location of the long-term series and the union has rules about hiring locals. I was literally in the right place at the right time with the right skills.

With the industry bustling, it was easier for me to start over than I’d thought. The historic part of town became trendy. I lived in an old high school that was converted to loft apartments. I avoided the places that hurt the most, the neighborhood where I grew up, the community where my father’s now-defunct church stood abandoned and empty. His money schemes eventually ran him out of town and left the church in bankruptcy. My mother still worked at the police station, but even so, I didn’t see her often. Years of therapy made me realize our relationship was better with a little distance.

I had goals of something bigger and better—New York or Hollywood--but something about Allendale still felt right to me. I was a small-town girl—woman—at heart.

“Heaven?” 

I glanced at Lea. She looked at me expectantly with bright brown eyes. She was Korean and a whiz at makeup and FX, but still in school part-time. We’d become close when we both landed our dream jobs and scrambled to learn the ropes.

“What?”

“I asked how long it had been since you’d gone on a date?”

“Not long enough to know that I’m not a fan of dating, especially blind dates.”

“Look, we’re in the same boat. Double blind dates. Set up by RJ, who I’m hoping knows some attractive guys. Don’t they have a club or something?”

“The hot guy club?” I’d laugh but I’d known a club like that…well, not really a club, but a group of ridiculously hot guys that all hung out together. But I also knew Lea had a point. Did you say no to a famous actor agreeing to set you up on a date with some friends? No. You didn’t. Sure, it would probably end up a total disaster but would make for a good story and laugh at some point.

Plus, even I couldn’t bear another night of reality TV at home alone. Seriously, I needed to do something other than work and binge Netflix all night. 

We arrived at the sushi bar—one of the kinds where you ordered at the bar via computer and a conveyer belt carried out the food. It was new and trendy and I expected it to last about three months before something newer and trendier took its place. That was half the reason I agreed to come tonight. I want to see my shrimp tempura slide across the counter on tiny plates. 

It was as much of a bar as a restaurant and the bouncer waved us in. RJ told Lea we’d meet the guys here, probably afraid I’d bail if they showed up at my loft. I scanned the room but I saw nothing but a bunch of young people looking like they were trying too hard to have fun. Faking a good time had never been easy for me—and when it was, it only got me in hot water.

“What do we know about these guys?” I asked, sliding into a bar stool.

“They’re guys,” was her only reply. When I make a face, begging for more,, she rolls her eyes. “If I knew anything it wouldn’t matter. Anything I say will only get some kind of snarky reply.”

“That’s not true.” I ordered a Japanese beer from the bartender. “Why would you say that?”

“Because you have a particular type—one I haven’t figured out yet. It seems to be a vague mix of some kind of unattainable, imaginary guy that doesn’t live up to your exes.”

I sighed, thinking about the Allendale Four. “If you knew them, you’d understand why they’re hard to surpass.”

“I’d love to get to know them, but since you cut them out of your life it’s not happening.” She took a drink from the shot glass the waiter pushed toward her, and grimaced. “You don’t use social media for anything other than work, so I can’t stalk them there. You refuse to talk about them—all I know is that you had this epic romance, until you didn’t.”

“Epic may be an exaggeration.”

Leigh gives me a hard look. “They were a big part of your life. It has to be weird not having them involved anymore.”

“First of all, I didn’t cut them out of my life. We, as a group, made a decision. And that decision was that everyone should be free to pursue their dreams. We all had different ones and continuing our relationship was only going to hinder that.” 

I took a long swallow of my beer, trying not to think of the day Anderson got his invite to train year-round with the US National team, and earned his first spot in the Olympic games. I didn’t want to remember the mixed feelings when Hayden was recruited to play professionally across the country—only available a few weeks of the year. I refused to remember how Oliver and Jackson sat down with me, tears in their eyes, and told me it didn’t feel right to go on. That there was a fracture in the group. I felt it. They felt it. We were incomplete and that led us to find different homes, different jobs, and different lives.

So, we cut ties. Completely, and other than seeing a few things in the news occasionally about Hayden or Anderson, I’d walked away completely. 

“I get why you ended the relationship,” she said, “but there is no way they wanted you to go on forever alone, creating monster faces and living a nun’s life.”

I fought back a grimace. I sure as hell hoped they were living a monk’s life, even though I knew it was ridiculous. The idea of them with anyone else…

I took another gulp from my drink.

“Okay.” I exhaled shakily. “Tonight is the night I move on. No snarky comments. No leaving before midnight. Tell me what you know about these guys.”

“All RJ said was that he met them at the gym.”

I made a face. “Seriously? Gym rats?”

“Stop, you promised!” I adjusted my face into something more pleasant and she continued. “He met them there but I think they train him or something? They’re connected to the business somehow. A group that specifically works with the entertainment industry in town.”

That was logical. All RJ did was work and exercise, training his body into a work of perfection. His physique, his face, and his eyes were what got him into this business. It was ironic that my job was to cover it up. To be honest, I was a little surprised he set Lea up on a blind date. The flirty vibes between them lately were intense.

“Okay, so they’re athletes.” I could handle athletes. Four of them, in fact. I scanned the room, trying to figure out if they were here yet. There were a few suspects and one guy across the room caught my eye. Handsome. Built. Definitely worked out. His dark eyes met mine and I raised an eyebrow; was this one of the dates? 

I opened my mouth to point him out, but Lea’s small hand wrapped around my forearm and squeezed. “I think that’s them,” she said in a low voice.

The hair prickled on the back of my neck long before I looked at the door, like a spidey-sense warning me of trouble. It was too late, though, because I ignored the feeling and locked eyes with the brightest of blues. My heart jumped to my throat and my knees threatened to buckle. 

His reaction was nothing more than a blip, the quick rearranging of his face to disguise his shock but zero halt to his swagger. I braced for a second time when I spotted the man behind him, who wasn’t as smooth. His jaw, leaner than before, tightened. There was no mistaking the shock and conflict in his eyes.

“Shit,” I muttered.

“Hot, right?” Lea asked, taking in the curly, tousled locks on the first one and the broad chest on the second. When I didn’t reply, she glanced at me and frowned. “What’s wrong?”

They stopped before us and the guy with soulful brown eyes grabbed my drink out of my hand, gulping down the contents. Lea watched in shock, waiting for an explanation.

“Lea, this is Jackson and Oliver.” I pointed to each one, my world spinning on its axis. “My exes.”

* * *

“A beer, please,” Oliver said to the bartender. Jackson elbowed him. “Make that two.”

“Three,” I added before looking at them, terrified to do so. “What are you doing here?”

“What are you doing here?” Jackson asked back. “Since when do you hang out in bars?”

“We’re waiting on a blind date,” Lea replied. She smiled brightly and brushed a stripe of purple hair behind her ear. “Hi, I’m Lea.”

Oliver’s eyes darkened. “Was this date set up by someone you work with?”

I didn’t say his name. That’s part of the business, not spreading around celebrity contacts. “Yes.”

“Is he famous?” Jackson asked, reaching for the green bottle off the bar top. He knew my profession, even if I didn’t know theirs.

I stared at him, non-committal, as though I wasn’t about to fall apart. I wanted desperately to hug him, ask him a million questions, drag him back to my house, but that wasn’t who we were anymore. I kept my mouth shut and watched him, noting how freaking good he looked. Both of them did, and I had to fight back on my gawking. They’d grown since I’d seen them last, matured, and it suited them better than I could have anticipated.

When I didn’t answer, Jackson admitted quietly, “RJ set this up, okay? We had no idea.”

“How do you know RJ? He told Lea something about trainers?” 

Jackson grinned proudly. “We opened a gym. Specifically for the talent coming into town. We’ve got everything from weight lifting, Parkour, and sports training, like baseball and soccer.”

Lea thought this over for a second, then her eyes lit up. “Oh, I’ve heard of you guys! A5 Training?”

He smiled wider. “That’s it.”

A5. Oliver glanced my way then averted his eyes again. He could barely look at me. My stomach tightened and twisted. I wanted nothing more than to just run and pretend none of this had happened.

“Did RJ know?” I asked suddenly. “Did he do this on purpose?”

Lea frowned. “No, Heaven, I don’t think so. This is just a bizarre coincidence.”

I shook my head. “There’s no way. He must have done some digging after I told him about us.”

Oliver’s head jerked my way. “You told him about us?”

“Not your names or anything specific. We were just killing time during a long session in my makeup chair.” I eyed them suspiciously. “Does he really train with you?”

“Yeah, three times a week,” Jackson replied, his eyes and voice softening. “I agree, it’s a weird coincidence, Heaven, but stranger things have happened.”

I wasn’t so sure about that. Sure, Allendale was growing, but it wasn’t that big of a city. I knew the internet was forever. If he dug around, he could find what he wanted. I sighed. If RJ was playing games…it was the wrong subject. Even though it had been two years, everything still felt raw. There was no doubt they felt it, too.

“Well, I’ve been waiting forever to meet one or two of you guys; I want to hear everything about everything,” Lea said, leaning eagerly toward Jackson.

I couldn’t do it. Not a chance. I couldn’t relive the stories, the good times or the bad. I’d worked too damn hard to get my shit together for these two to walk in and rip me apart again. My hand shook when I reached into my bag and found my wallet. I tossed cash on the bar. “With things going sideways like this, I’m calling it a night.”

“You’re leaving?” Lea asked, frowning.

“Same,” Oliver agreed. 

“Dude,” Jackson said, but Oliver was already headed to the door without another word.

Jackson and I watched him go and it hurt. Fuck, fuck, fuck it hurt. He turned back to me and gave me a sad, lopsided grin. “It was good to see you, Heaven.”

“You too, Jackson. You look good, both of you, and I’m proud of you for opening the gym and figuring things out.”

He shoved his hands in his pocket. “I’m not sure any of us ever figured anything out but, thank you. Your approval means everything to us.”

Lea watched us like a tennis match, but I felt the wounds being picked at like a scab. It was time to go, so I left. Again.

 

 

Chapter 3

 

Oliver

 

The warm city air hit me as I strode out of the bar. I ducked past the line of people trying to get in, a few women smiling in my direction. I only wanted one woman to grace me with a grin tonight, and she could barely muster eye contact.

I’d known going on a blind date was a bad idea, but Jackson assured me it was good for business and developing a relationship with someone as influential as RJ Malone. I saw his point, and it wasn’t like we were finding a lot of dates on our own. The business took up most our time, and thankfully, it left us with a valid excuse for our monk-ish lives. Things had never shifted back for either of us after the group split. Anderson was laser-focused, like always. Training. Competing. Wash, rinse, repeat. 

Hayden spent the first year traveling across Europe before winning a spot as the first-string goalie on the Atlanta United Team. Increasingly, his face was everywhere from endorsements to celebrity events.

And Heaven? She’d been down the road from us but we kept our distance. We made a deal and despite the proximity, stuck with it.

Until tonight.

We should’ve known it was only a matter of time before we ran into one another, but a blind date? You couldn’t make that shit up.

It felt wrong going to meet another woman. It always did—had—since the day we forged our relationship with Heaven. We were just kids, but what we had? It was more. I’d known it then. I knew it now. Walking in that door felt like a betrayal, followed by a punch in the gut seeing her standing there; smiling, confident, and absolutely gorgeous.

It wasn’t the body of a girl that stood by the bar. It was one of a woman; it was like I thought I knew what she looked like, thought I knew her body, but there was a subtle difference—just enough to stop me cold. Long legs, the slight curve of her hips, the leanness of her arms, and sharp cheekbones were the make-up of an enhanced Heaven Reeves. I’d absorbed everything in a matter of moments, the way she wore her hair was up, twisted at the back of her head exposing the long, swanlike column or her neck. 

I’d known I’d missed her, but not exactly how much until that moment, and now, after a bit of fresh air, I felt like a complete dick taking off like that. I’d never walked away from Heaven before. Not during the dark days. Not during the hard shit. Never—but that didn’t stop the wedge of time from separating us and changing everything.

We’d made a deal.

I reminded myself of this every damn day. I knew Jackson did as well. I know he floundered, brushing off the advances of our female clients, the accountant, the saleswoman that came once a month to demonstrate the new equipment. He’d had opportunities, we both had, and neither of us ever took the bait.

Except this one fucking time.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I expect it to be Jackson, but it wasn’t. Anderson’s name flashing on the screen. Did he know? I refused to believe Jackson called him. Not a chance.

“Hey,” I said into the phone, ducking into the alcove of a closed shop. I stood across the street from new, trendy lofts. 

“Hey, man,” Anderson said. “I had a break and thought I’d check in—see how you’re doing.”

Yeah no, he didn’t know. Talk about coincidences.

“Everything’s good here. Busy. The industry is strong here and we’re picking up clients left and right.”

“That’s awesome.”

“How’s the training?”

“Same,” he replied. Anderson had been committed to an Olympic swim career since he was eight years old. During the last Games, that dream came to fruition. The next one was only a summer away. “Qualifiers are coming up. You wouldn’t believe the amount of food I’m eating right now just to keep my strength and energy up.”

“God, I’m jealous,” I laughed. “I’ve been on this low-carb, cutting diet. It sucks.”

“Sounds awful. I’ll eat some pasta for you.”

“Do that.” I spotted a figure walking down the street, the gait quick and familiar. I knew the swing of those hips. Fuck. I ducked deeper into the shadows. “Have you heard from Hayden?”

“Yeah, his tournament starts in two weeks. He said things look good for them to make a run at the championship this year.”

“Awesome.” Hayden’s skills only amplified when he got out of college. If he was a beast then, he was more like a dragon now. “We’ll catch the game this weekend.”

“Good, I’ll call then and we can watch together.”

My eyes were still trained on the woman walking across the street. She stopped and climbed the stairs toward the lofts. Did she live there? The instant she hit the top step I found myself avoiding traffic and crossing the street, following her up the cement staircase. What the hell was I doing?

“Oliver?” 

“Yeah?” I realized he’d still been talking about the game. “Sorry, I ran out for a bit and was just dodging cars.”

“Huh, you have a date?” he asked, surprisingly. 

Surprising that he asked and surprising that in theory, I did. “Uh, no. How about you? What’s going on with Caitlin James?” 

“Nothing’s going on with Caitlin.” His voice was hard. “We’re just both repped by the same aquatic group. We have to travel a lot together.”

“Okay, got it.” The implication was clear. Anderson didn’t date any more than me or Jackson. Heaven entered the front door of the building by pressing a code. Against all instincts of self-preservation, I dashed behind her and caught the door before it swung shut. “Yeah, uh,” I said quietly, “I should probably go.” I heard her footsteps a floor up. Maybe two. I’d lost my damn mind.

“Yeah, I need to go eat. Talk to you Saturday?”

“Yep.”

“Love you, man.” 

“You too, bro,” I replied softly and shut off my phone. 

I was breaking a million rules right now, I thought, following Heaven up the stairs, arriving on the second floor just in time to see her apartment door close.

I had no idea how long I stood there; minutes? An hour?

But there was no way I was leaving without talking to her. Alone. Just this once. Heaven Reeves had always drawn me in, like a moth to a flame, and like a stupid, fucking moth, I was willing to get burned.