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Synopsis
An Amish midwife and an Englisch doctor must embrace their differences to rescue a baby in need in this uplifting romance that will "warm your heart" (Marta Perry). Kyle Miller never planned on becoming a country doctor. But when he's offered a medical practice in his sleepy hometown, Kyle knows he must return... and face the painful past he left behind. Except the Amish community isn't quite ready for Kyle. Especially the pretty midwife who refuses to compromise her traditions with his modern medicine... The more Leah Stoltzfus works with the handsome Englisch doctor, the more she finds herself caught between the expectations of her family and her own hopes for the future. It will take one surprising revelation and one helpless baby in need of love to show Leah and Kyle that their bond may be greater than their differences... if Leah can find the courage to follow her heart. " The Amish Teacher's Gift might have been the first book I've read by Rachel J. Good, but it won't be my last." - Shelley Shepard Gray, New York Times bestselling author The Love & Promises series: The Amish Teacher's Gift The Amish Midwife's Secret The Amish Widow's Rescue
Release date: November 27, 2018
Publisher: Forever
Print pages: 385
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The Amish Midwife's Secret
Rachel J. Good
Chapter One
The phone rang as Kyle Miller was rushing out the door. He didn’t recognize the number. Probably a telemarketer, but just in case it was work related, he hit the answer button, tucked the phone between his ear and shoulder, and shoved one arm into his coat before saying, “Hello.”
Slamming the door shut behind him by hooking it with one foot, he repeated his greeting. Definitely an automated call. He should hang up now, but he was busy shrugging his other arm into the sleeve. If traffic was heavy, he was going to be late. He sighed loudly.
A voice on the other end quavered. “Kyle?”
It sounded like a human, but some of those telemarketing firms managed to make their robocalls sound real. “Yes?” he answered cautiously. He wasn’t interested in a time share or a free cruise or…
“Kyle, it’s Dr. Hess. I have a question for you.”
Dr. Hess? Name doesn’t sound familiar. Not one of the doctors I work with at the hospital.
“Yes?” he said again as he clicked open his car door and slid into the seat.
“I’m not sure if you remember me, but you and your brother used to visit my office. And I took care of your parents when…”
The words hit Kyle like a fast, hard gut punch. He froze with his hand on the car door but couldn’t move to close it. Old memories came flooding back. Memories he’d pushed below the surface. Memories he’d hoped never to dredge up again.
His “I remember” came out shakily. Why would the doctor be calling him? Had something happened to his brother? He hadn’t spoken to Caleb in years. A flood of guilt hit him. If Caleb had been hurt or was dying, could he go back and face him? And what about the twins and…and Emma. No, he never wanted to see Emma again.
“Is everything all right? Has something happened to Caleb or—?”
“No, no, I didn’t mean to alarm you. This isn’t a medical emergency. Well, it is in a way. But it’s my own emergency.”
It dawned on Kyle that he’d been sitting there unmoving. He’d forgotten all about being late for his shift. He yanked the car door shut and started the engine. Flicking the phone button on the steering wheel with one hand, he pocketed the phone with his other, then yanked the gear shift into reverse to back out.
“I have some friends at the hospital who’ve been keeping tabs on you,” Dr. Hess continued. “They’ve been telling me you’ll go far in the field.”
“Thanks.” Although if he were honest, the thought of someone checking up on him gave him an uncomfortable feeling. Had Caleb asked their old family doctor to spy?
Kyle whipped his car into traffic and pressed his foot on the accelerator to shoot around a slow-moving truck. The minute he did, old memories haunted him. One memory in particular he wished he could erase. Speeding had destroyed his life and cost him everything he’d always wanted. He lifted his foot and let the car glide to a safer speed while Dr. Hess prattled on about his retirement dreams.
Biting back a sigh, Kyle tuned out the old man’s words as he maneuvered through heavy rush hour traffic. He regretted not grabbing a cup of coffee to wake him up, because the drone of Dr. Hess’s words was lulling him to sleep. Surely, the doctor hadn’t called a relative stranger to discuss his future plans. Kyle wished Dr. Hess would get to the point.
“So I considered shutting down the practice, but I’m one of the few doctors in the Lancaster area who still makes house calls. People have come to expect it. That’s where you come in.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you. Seems to me you’ll be needing a place to work now that you’re done with your residency. I’d be happy to turn my practice over to you if you’d help me out for the next year or two. I’d like to cut back to part-time hours.”
Kyle slammed on the brakes before he ran a red light. “Take over your practice?”
“Yes, I thought Esther and I could move to the retirement village she’s been talking about. You could live in the house so you’d have the office right there.”
Kyle pictured the huge old farmhouse set on a country road with the office attached to one side. It was a far cry from his future aspirations, which included working at a major medical center in a large city. Country life wasn’t for him.
“It’s a great offer,” he said, planning to let his old family doctor down gently. “I’ll, umm…”
“Esther and I prayed about it, and we both felt led to give the practice to you.”
“Give?” Kyle said faintly.
“Yes, give. We have plenty of money to buy a home in the retirement village and live comfortably. With no children of our own, we thought it would be nice to help another young doctor starting out. The mortgage is paid off, and you’d only be responsible for the bills once I leave the practice.”
Kyle pulled into a parking space at the hospital. The man is giving away his practice and his home? “That’s a mighty generous offer. I, umm, need to get in to work now. If I don’t, I’ll be late. But I’ll think about it.”
“Don’t just think. Pray about it.”
Kyle choked back the negative retort that sprang to his lips. You wouldn’t catch him praying. “Um, yes. I have to go, but I’ll let you know my decision.” He said a hasty good-bye and ran for the staff entrance.
Having just completed his residency and still drowning in med school debt, the offer was tempting. And it would allow him to repay another huge debt. A debt that had haunted him for years. An unpaid debt to an Amish community.
But it would mean returning to a place he’d left years ago and to which he’d vowed never to return. A place where he’d have to face all the demons of his past.
* * *
Leah waited for Dr. Hess to get off the phone. Usually his wife, Esther, acted as receptionist, but the doctor was sitting in the outer office, which meant Leah couldn’t help overhearing his conversation.
“You’re finally getting some assistance?” she asked when he hung up.
Dr. Hess laughed. “Esther convinced me it’s time to retire, but I can’t go until I’m sure I have a good replacement who will do everything I do.”
“Someone like that may be hard to find.”
“True, but I’m hoping to convince a recent med school graduate to move back to the area. He grew up around here, and his mother—” Dr. Hess ran a hand through his silver hair. “Esther tells me I ramble too much, and she’s right.” He leaned forward, all attention on her. “What do you need today, Leah?”
“I have an expectant mother I’m worried about, but she refuses to come to the office. She says she can’t leave the children. I suspect it’s money.” Leah held out some ten-dollar bills.
Dr. Hess waved them away. “I have more than enough money. I can certainly afford to do some free visits.”
“Yes, but—”
The doctor interrupted her. “What’s her name and address?”
Leah gave him the information and tried once again to give him the money, but the doctor refused it.
He rose and picked up his medical bag. “I’ll head over there now.”
“Thank you so much. I’m praying for a healthy delivery for her.” Leah followed him to the door and out to the parking lot. “I must admit I’m curious about this new doctor. You said he was from the area?” As a midwife, she’d have to work closely with him.
Dr. Hess stopped beside his car. “His name’s Kyle Miller.”
Leah gasped. “Caleb Miller’s brother?”
With a quick nod, Dr. Hess slipped into the driver’s seat. “I’m hoping everyone can let bygones be bygones.”
The Amish community had forgiven Kyle, but having him back in their midst as a doctor might dredge up old hurts. And for Leah, it meant confronting a secret she thought would stay hidden. A secret she’d concealed for years.
Chapter Two
The rest of the week, Dr. Hess’s offer haunted Kyle. Could he go back to that sleepy town in the middle of nowhere? Leave behind his dreams of a fellowship in rare diseases? Even more worrisome, could he live and work among the Amish, especially if it meant facing the ones whose lives he’d destroyed?
The doctor called on Friday, just before Kyle flopped into bed, exhausted after extra hours on call. “Son, I’m not trying to pressure you, but I wondered if you’d thought about my offer.”
Kyle mumbled something noncommittal. All he wanted to do was sleep.
“According to Dr. Patel, you have three days off in a row starting next Wednesday. I’d like to buy you a plane ticket to fly here for a visit. It would give you a chance to look over the practice, see what I do, and discuss possible arrangements if it’s something you decide will suit.”
Kyle had been planning to catch up on sleep and dirty laundry. “I don’t know if—”
“I realize it’s a major commitment. That’s why I’d like you to come for a brief visit.”
Kyle hesitated. How could he refuse? Dr. Hess and his wife had been there for him and his brother, Caleb, during their agonizing decision to remove their mom from life support after the car accident that had already taken their dad’s life. Esther had mothered them for months after both funerals, ensuring they had clean clothes and meals and occasional motherly hugs.
“You probably have a lot to do.” Dr. Hess’s voice wavered, adding to Kyle’s guilt.
“I, umm, I’ll book a flight.”
“I’m happy to pay. I know how expensive medical school is, and I’m asking you to do me a favor on your precious time off.”
“It’s all right.” Kyle yawned. “I’ll swing it.” Money was tight, but he didn’t want to be beholden to Dr. Hess. If Kyle decided staying in the Amish community was too painful, it would make turning the doctor down that much harder.
“I apologize,” Dr. Hess said. “Sounds like I’m keeping you from some much-needed sleep. Good night, and I’ll see you Wednesday. Let me know when your flight gets in, and Esther will pick you up.”
“Thanks,” Kyle managed before another yawn overtook him. Soon after he shut off his phone, he fell into a deep sleep. But his last thoughts before he drifted off were of Emma…and the baby…
* * *
Memories continued to trouble Kyle as the days ticked down to Wednesday. Several times he almost canceled his flight, but he hated to break a promise or let the Hesses down, so on Wednesday morning, he headed to the airport as planned.
After a brief flight, Kyle walked out into a frigid October day. He preferred the warmer North Carolina weather.
Esther Hess was waiting by the curb when he walked out the door. She’d aged since he’d last seen her, but the wrinkles creasing her face formed deep smile lines. “I’m so glad you decided to come.” She motioned for him to get into an old-fashioned black car sporting black bumpers, grill, and hubcaps. Not fashionable ones, but ones whose chrome had been blackened with a paintbrush. She smiled at his confusion.
“It’s a Black-Bumper Mennonite car. They believe the silver is too gaudy and showy. They also dress plainly and have some of the same practices as the Amish.”
At the word Amish, Kyle winced. “Are you and the doctor planning to join a Black-Bumper church?” If they were, would Esther need to exchange her matronly flower-print dress, which fell to just below her knees, for a calf-length black dress that some conservative Mennonites wore?
Esther smiled. “We may be Mennonites, but we’re not quite that strict. We bought the car secondhand because it was an excellent price. I kept everything black to remind me to stay humble.”
A few people in the airport parking lot pointed and stared, making Kyle glad he didn’t know many people in the area anymore.
“Martin’s promised to give up the practice as soon as God sends someone who’ll do it for him. It may be selfish of me”—Esther shot him a sideways glance—“but I’m hoping he’s found that someone in you. Forty years is a long time. He deserves a break.”
“He certainly does.” That doesn’t mean it needs to be me. I certainly wouldn’t be anyone’s answer to prayer.
As Esther drove, Kyle almost drifted off to sleep. Not only because he was physically drained, but because coming back here had hit him hard emotionally.
The jangle of a phone startled him.
“Would you mind answering that?” Esther asked. “It’s Martin’s ringtone.”
Kyle mumbled a groggy hello.
Dr. Hess’s jovial welcome boomed through the phone, and Kyle held it away from his ear.
“Glad you arrived safely. Could you ask Esther to come to Enos Fisher’s?”
“We’ll be there shortly, Martin,” Esther called out. She smiled apologetically at Kyle. “I was hoping you’d get a bit more rest before Martin dragged you around on house calls.”
“It’s all right. I’m used to it. The lack of sleep, I mean.” He’d never done house calls. That would be a first.
As Esther wound her way out into the country, the neat brown squares of harvested fields resembled giant patchwork quilts, like the multicolored ones flapping on some clotheslines they passed. Kyle’s heart sank. He’d forgotten how isolated some of these farms were. And the outbuildings reminded him of parties at an Amish barn and…
He released a sigh as Esther bumped down a dirt lane toward a neat white farmhouse surrounded by rows of chopped-down cornstalks. Behind a wooden fence, cows lowed in the field, and when he opened the car door, the crisp fall air carried the earthy scent of farmland. Kyle inhaled deeply. The familiar sights and sounds made his eyes misty. Though he and Caleb had grown up Englisch and had lived in town, they’d spent time on friends’ farms, and Kyle had visited one Amish house more times than he could count.
He shook off the nostalgia. Being here with the doctor meant he needed to appear professional. He pasted on a neutral, businesslike expression.
Esther stepped past him and hurried onto the wooden porch. “Yoo-hoo,” she called through the screen door.
A little boy of about four, with a bowl haircut, pushed open the door. His black pants and suspenders signaled they’d come to an Amish home. Kyle’s stomach clenched. Not only his first house call. His first time entering an Amish home since…
“We left the door open so you could come in.” The boy’s eyes widened as they traveled up Kyle’s height. “You’re tall.”
“Yes, he is.” Esther stepped into the living room. “How’s baby Aaron?”
His older sister, who appeared to be about eight, came up behind him and smiled shyly. She wore a long dress and had her hair twisted on the sides and pulled back into a bun. “He’ll get better now that Leah’s here. She brought some ingredients to help Mamm. They’re in the kitchen.”
“Oh, good. Did you stay home from school today?”
The young girl shook her head. “I only came home during lunchtime to watch Aaron while Mamm and Daed meet with Leah.”
Esther motioned for Kyle to follow her down the hall. “You’ll get to meet Leah, our midwife-in-training. The two of you will work together on high-risk preg— um, high-risk cases.” She leaned over and whispered so the children couldn’t hear. “Amish women never mention they’re expecting, especially not to men and children.”
Kyle frowned. “I’d think it would be obvious.”
“That may be, but no one talks about it. I hope you’ll respect that.”
Once again, Esther acted as if he’d already agreed to take over the practice. They crossed the threshold to a large, spacious kitchen with a hand-hewn wooden table capable of seating ten. Dr. Hess sat on one of the chairs, waiting patiently as several women and girls bustled around.
Whew! Onions and cayenne pepper stung Kyle’s nose and eyes. The odor didn’t remind him of typical Amish cooking. A young woman who appeared to be in her midtwenties and about eight months pregnant stepped over to the stove carrying what looked like a piece of nylon stocking.
“Are you ready for this, Leah?” she asked an attractive Amish girl stirring a pot on the stove.
“Not quite. Could you hand me the herbs and essential oils?”
The young mother obliged, and the girl—Leah?—took the pot off the stove before adding some ingredients to the mixture she was stirring.
A small girl who couldn’t have been more than five staggered into the kitchen, carrying a heavy bundle wrapped in blankets. “Here’s Aaron, Mamm.”
She was holding a baby? Sucking in a breath, Kyle rushed across the kitchen floor to rescue the dangling infant. Before he reached them, Dr. Hess turned around and held out his arms.
“I’ll take him.” The doctor slid a hand under the baby. He didn’t seem at all perturbed that the girl could have dropped the child.
Kyle’s heart banged against his chest at the near accident, but the expectant mother only smiled and thanked the little girl for bringing her brother to the doctor. The girl had called her Mamm, so she and the baby must both belong to this woman.
“This baby is yours?” Kyle could barely keep the shock from his voice. “He’s only about a year old.”
“Eleven months,” the mother corrected, her words soft and gentle.
Eleven months? And she was about to have another soon. Kyle almost asked when her next baby was due, but recalling Esther’s caution, he clamped his mouth shut.
After the little girl partially undressed the baby, Dr. Hess lowered the stethoscope to the infant’s chest. His face grave, he slid the chest piece around several times. Then, while propping the baby’s chest against his hand, he touched the stethoscope to various spots on the baby’s back. He rewrapped the child in blankets and beckoned for Kyle to take his place on the chair.
“See what you think.” The doctor set one hand on the baby to keep him from rolling off the table and held out the stethoscope with the other.
The look in his eyes challenged Kyle. Was this a test of competence? His nervous fingers closed around the earpieces. Overcoming his squeamishness about using someone else’s equipment, he fumbled to insert the ear tips and then set the diaphragm against the infant’s tiny chest. The crackling, bubbling, and rumbling coming through the chest piece as the baby wheezed left no doubt of the diagnosis.
To keep from blurting out the answer, Kyle fiddled with the earpieces as he waited for Dr. Hess to reposition the baby. Kyle had no need to listen to the child’s back, but to look professional, he finished the exam. His eyes sought Dr. Hess’s before he announced, “Pneumonia.”
Dr. Hess nodded.
“I know.” Leah, who’d been stirring the smelly mixture in the pot, motioned for the mother to hold out the nylon bag so she could spoon the mush into it. “That’s why we’re making this poultice.” With a quick motion, she wrapped the nylon in a towel and hurried to the table.
She practically elbowed Kyle out of the way as she reached for the baby. With deft movements, she placed the stinking mixture on the baby’s chest, quickly redressed him, and swaddled him in warm blankets. “This should help.”
“Help?” Kyle’s eyes burned from the sharp stench rising from the infant’s body, and he choked. “That child belongs in a hospital.”
“Hospital?” Leah shot him an incredulous glance. “How could his mamm be with him? She shouldn’t be jolting all that way to the hospital, and who’d care for the children?”
Kyle couldn’t believe his ears. “Children under age two are at the greatest risk—” He broke off when Dr. Hess jiggled his arm. Snapping his mouth shut, Kyle waited for the doctor to speak. This was still Dr. Hess’s case, after all. Just because he’d allowed Kyle to offer a diagnosis, it didn’t mean Kyle should take over.
“I’ll put the baby in the cradle.” Leah looked at the mother, who nodded.
Dr. Hess held out a hand to stop her, and Kyle released a pent-up sigh. The doctor would explain the need for hospitalization. Instead he gestured toward Kyle. “Before you go, Leah, I’d like you to meet Kyle. I’m hoping to convince him to take over my practice.”
Leah ducked her head and mumbled a brief greeting. She refused to meet his eyes, which might be just as well, because his face likely would reveal how upset he was about the home remedy. Pneumonia wasn’t something to fool around with, especially not in infants.
“Kyle, you’ll be working closely with Leah. She’s in training to be a midwife, and she makes many effective herbal remedies.”
Kyle managed to say, “Pleased to meet you,” but he wasn’t sure how true that was.
Dr. Hess might trust Leah’s homemade brews, but when Kyle graduated from medical school, he’d taken an oath promising his patients’ health would always be his foremost consideration. So how could he stand here and let her smear a stinky concoction on a baby’s chest when that child should be taken to the hospital?
He could never allow anyone to harm a baby. Never.
Chapter Three
Kyle. Leah’s arms tightened around the baby, and her heart quickened. She averted her gaze because, if she met Kyle’s eyes, he might read the guilt in hers. Or worse yet, remember the part she’d played that dreadful night. After he’d left town years ago, she’d buried her fear that he’d discover the truth. Now he was here in this kitchen, close enough to touch. Leah struggled to control her trembling, to put the past out of her mind, to concentrate on the darling baby in her arms.
Although she avoided meeting Kyle’s eyes, she couldn’t help noting his pursed lips. He appeared to be pinching back a retort, and his nose had wrinkled when she’d put the onion poultice on baby Aaron’s chest. She suspected Kyle’s expression wasn’t only a reaction to the strong smell. Definitely not a good sign. The last thing they needed was a doctor who didn’t understand Amish ways.
His half-hearted greeting proved he felt as wary of her as she did of him. Having Kyle Miller back in the community would be difficult enough, but having to work with him during deliveries would be torture. Any moment he might glance at her and…
The baby emitted a phlegmy cough, and Leah tipped him upright and patted his back to ease his breathing. Beside her, Kyle’s body tensed as if he wanted to snatch Aaron from her. Leah swished past him before he could make a move and headed for the cradle in the back bedroom.
When she reached the room, she shut the door behind her to give herself some time to recover. Her breathing was as labored as the baby’s. Kyle hadn’t looked at her closely. If he did, would he remember that time their eyes locked and both their worlds changed forever? Leah didn’t want to take that chance.
From the brief glimpse she had of him, Kyle looked too slick and polished to return to a small farming community. Why would he even want to come back after what happened? Although the Amish would never hold his past against him, few in their area would visit his office or invite him into their homes if he refused to accept their way of life.
As much as she wanted to see Dr. Hess enjoy retirement—he worked much too hard—Kyle Miller was the last person she’d want to take his place. The first chance she got, she’d recommend that Dr. Hess find a different assistant. Seeing Kyle again made her realize she couldn’t work with him. Not only did they have totally different ideas on how to handle illness, but being around him sent waves of guilt over her. Kyle might never remember what she’d done, but the shame of that night was burned indelibly into her memory.
Rather than settling baby Aaron in the cradle, Leah sank onto the nearby bed and cuddled him close. For years, she’d yearned to have a family of her own, but holding babies like this had been her only chance to hug little ones. Blinking back tears, she patted Aaron’s back as he coughed. Now that she’d started dating Ben, she’d begun to hope someday he’d be her husband and they’d have a family. That possibility could become a reality…if only they could start agreeing on things.
Ben didn’t want her being a midwife, but Leah was determined to show him she could make their relationship and her career work. So far, they’d crossed a few hurdles and managed to stay together. The fall months would be busier than usual with weddings, babies, and illnesses, making it a challenge to find time to be together.
“Leah?” Dr. Hess’s voice boomed through the house, and she jumped, startling baby Aaron, whose thin wail came out choked.
She lifted him to her shoulder, breathing shallowly to avoid getting a strong whiff of the onion, and rubbed his back. “Be right there,” she called back as she waited for Aaron’s spate of coughing to subside. When he’d quieted, she propped him in the cradle to make it easie. . .
The phone rang as Kyle Miller was rushing out the door. He didn’t recognize the number. Probably a telemarketer, but just in case it was work related, he hit the answer button, tucked the phone between his ear and shoulder, and shoved one arm into his coat before saying, “Hello.”
Slamming the door shut behind him by hooking it with one foot, he repeated his greeting. Definitely an automated call. He should hang up now, but he was busy shrugging his other arm into the sleeve. If traffic was heavy, he was going to be late. He sighed loudly.
A voice on the other end quavered. “Kyle?”
It sounded like a human, but some of those telemarketing firms managed to make their robocalls sound real. “Yes?” he answered cautiously. He wasn’t interested in a time share or a free cruise or…
“Kyle, it’s Dr. Hess. I have a question for you.”
Dr. Hess? Name doesn’t sound familiar. Not one of the doctors I work with at the hospital.
“Yes?” he said again as he clicked open his car door and slid into the seat.
“I’m not sure if you remember me, but you and your brother used to visit my office. And I took care of your parents when…”
The words hit Kyle like a fast, hard gut punch. He froze with his hand on the car door but couldn’t move to close it. Old memories came flooding back. Memories he’d pushed below the surface. Memories he’d hoped never to dredge up again.
His “I remember” came out shakily. Why would the doctor be calling him? Had something happened to his brother? He hadn’t spoken to Caleb in years. A flood of guilt hit him. If Caleb had been hurt or was dying, could he go back and face him? And what about the twins and…and Emma. No, he never wanted to see Emma again.
“Is everything all right? Has something happened to Caleb or—?”
“No, no, I didn’t mean to alarm you. This isn’t a medical emergency. Well, it is in a way. But it’s my own emergency.”
It dawned on Kyle that he’d been sitting there unmoving. He’d forgotten all about being late for his shift. He yanked the car door shut and started the engine. Flicking the phone button on the steering wheel with one hand, he pocketed the phone with his other, then yanked the gear shift into reverse to back out.
“I have some friends at the hospital who’ve been keeping tabs on you,” Dr. Hess continued. “They’ve been telling me you’ll go far in the field.”
“Thanks.” Although if he were honest, the thought of someone checking up on him gave him an uncomfortable feeling. Had Caleb asked their old family doctor to spy?
Kyle whipped his car into traffic and pressed his foot on the accelerator to shoot around a slow-moving truck. The minute he did, old memories haunted him. One memory in particular he wished he could erase. Speeding had destroyed his life and cost him everything he’d always wanted. He lifted his foot and let the car glide to a safer speed while Dr. Hess prattled on about his retirement dreams.
Biting back a sigh, Kyle tuned out the old man’s words as he maneuvered through heavy rush hour traffic. He regretted not grabbing a cup of coffee to wake him up, because the drone of Dr. Hess’s words was lulling him to sleep. Surely, the doctor hadn’t called a relative stranger to discuss his future plans. Kyle wished Dr. Hess would get to the point.
“So I considered shutting down the practice, but I’m one of the few doctors in the Lancaster area who still makes house calls. People have come to expect it. That’s where you come in.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you. Seems to me you’ll be needing a place to work now that you’re done with your residency. I’d be happy to turn my practice over to you if you’d help me out for the next year or two. I’d like to cut back to part-time hours.”
Kyle slammed on the brakes before he ran a red light. “Take over your practice?”
“Yes, I thought Esther and I could move to the retirement village she’s been talking about. You could live in the house so you’d have the office right there.”
Kyle pictured the huge old farmhouse set on a country road with the office attached to one side. It was a far cry from his future aspirations, which included working at a major medical center in a large city. Country life wasn’t for him.
“It’s a great offer,” he said, planning to let his old family doctor down gently. “I’ll, umm…”
“Esther and I prayed about it, and we both felt led to give the practice to you.”
“Give?” Kyle said faintly.
“Yes, give. We have plenty of money to buy a home in the retirement village and live comfortably. With no children of our own, we thought it would be nice to help another young doctor starting out. The mortgage is paid off, and you’d only be responsible for the bills once I leave the practice.”
Kyle pulled into a parking space at the hospital. The man is giving away his practice and his home? “That’s a mighty generous offer. I, umm, need to get in to work now. If I don’t, I’ll be late. But I’ll think about it.”
“Don’t just think. Pray about it.”
Kyle choked back the negative retort that sprang to his lips. You wouldn’t catch him praying. “Um, yes. I have to go, but I’ll let you know my decision.” He said a hasty good-bye and ran for the staff entrance.
Having just completed his residency and still drowning in med school debt, the offer was tempting. And it would allow him to repay another huge debt. A debt that had haunted him for years. An unpaid debt to an Amish community.
But it would mean returning to a place he’d left years ago and to which he’d vowed never to return. A place where he’d have to face all the demons of his past.
* * *
Leah waited for Dr. Hess to get off the phone. Usually his wife, Esther, acted as receptionist, but the doctor was sitting in the outer office, which meant Leah couldn’t help overhearing his conversation.
“You’re finally getting some assistance?” she asked when he hung up.
Dr. Hess laughed. “Esther convinced me it’s time to retire, but I can’t go until I’m sure I have a good replacement who will do everything I do.”
“Someone like that may be hard to find.”
“True, but I’m hoping to convince a recent med school graduate to move back to the area. He grew up around here, and his mother—” Dr. Hess ran a hand through his silver hair. “Esther tells me I ramble too much, and she’s right.” He leaned forward, all attention on her. “What do you need today, Leah?”
“I have an expectant mother I’m worried about, but she refuses to come to the office. She says she can’t leave the children. I suspect it’s money.” Leah held out some ten-dollar bills.
Dr. Hess waved them away. “I have more than enough money. I can certainly afford to do some free visits.”
“Yes, but—”
The doctor interrupted her. “What’s her name and address?”
Leah gave him the information and tried once again to give him the money, but the doctor refused it.
He rose and picked up his medical bag. “I’ll head over there now.”
“Thank you so much. I’m praying for a healthy delivery for her.” Leah followed him to the door and out to the parking lot. “I must admit I’m curious about this new doctor. You said he was from the area?” As a midwife, she’d have to work closely with him.
Dr. Hess stopped beside his car. “His name’s Kyle Miller.”
Leah gasped. “Caleb Miller’s brother?”
With a quick nod, Dr. Hess slipped into the driver’s seat. “I’m hoping everyone can let bygones be bygones.”
The Amish community had forgiven Kyle, but having him back in their midst as a doctor might dredge up old hurts. And for Leah, it meant confronting a secret she thought would stay hidden. A secret she’d concealed for years.
Chapter Two
The rest of the week, Dr. Hess’s offer haunted Kyle. Could he go back to that sleepy town in the middle of nowhere? Leave behind his dreams of a fellowship in rare diseases? Even more worrisome, could he live and work among the Amish, especially if it meant facing the ones whose lives he’d destroyed?
The doctor called on Friday, just before Kyle flopped into bed, exhausted after extra hours on call. “Son, I’m not trying to pressure you, but I wondered if you’d thought about my offer.”
Kyle mumbled something noncommittal. All he wanted to do was sleep.
“According to Dr. Patel, you have three days off in a row starting next Wednesday. I’d like to buy you a plane ticket to fly here for a visit. It would give you a chance to look over the practice, see what I do, and discuss possible arrangements if it’s something you decide will suit.”
Kyle had been planning to catch up on sleep and dirty laundry. “I don’t know if—”
“I realize it’s a major commitment. That’s why I’d like you to come for a brief visit.”
Kyle hesitated. How could he refuse? Dr. Hess and his wife had been there for him and his brother, Caleb, during their agonizing decision to remove their mom from life support after the car accident that had already taken their dad’s life. Esther had mothered them for months after both funerals, ensuring they had clean clothes and meals and occasional motherly hugs.
“You probably have a lot to do.” Dr. Hess’s voice wavered, adding to Kyle’s guilt.
“I, umm, I’ll book a flight.”
“I’m happy to pay. I know how expensive medical school is, and I’m asking you to do me a favor on your precious time off.”
“It’s all right.” Kyle yawned. “I’ll swing it.” Money was tight, but he didn’t want to be beholden to Dr. Hess. If Kyle decided staying in the Amish community was too painful, it would make turning the doctor down that much harder.
“I apologize,” Dr. Hess said. “Sounds like I’m keeping you from some much-needed sleep. Good night, and I’ll see you Wednesday. Let me know when your flight gets in, and Esther will pick you up.”
“Thanks,” Kyle managed before another yawn overtook him. Soon after he shut off his phone, he fell into a deep sleep. But his last thoughts before he drifted off were of Emma…and the baby…
* * *
Memories continued to trouble Kyle as the days ticked down to Wednesday. Several times he almost canceled his flight, but he hated to break a promise or let the Hesses down, so on Wednesday morning, he headed to the airport as planned.
After a brief flight, Kyle walked out into a frigid October day. He preferred the warmer North Carolina weather.
Esther Hess was waiting by the curb when he walked out the door. She’d aged since he’d last seen her, but the wrinkles creasing her face formed deep smile lines. “I’m so glad you decided to come.” She motioned for him to get into an old-fashioned black car sporting black bumpers, grill, and hubcaps. Not fashionable ones, but ones whose chrome had been blackened with a paintbrush. She smiled at his confusion.
“It’s a Black-Bumper Mennonite car. They believe the silver is too gaudy and showy. They also dress plainly and have some of the same practices as the Amish.”
At the word Amish, Kyle winced. “Are you and the doctor planning to join a Black-Bumper church?” If they were, would Esther need to exchange her matronly flower-print dress, which fell to just below her knees, for a calf-length black dress that some conservative Mennonites wore?
Esther smiled. “We may be Mennonites, but we’re not quite that strict. We bought the car secondhand because it was an excellent price. I kept everything black to remind me to stay humble.”
A few people in the airport parking lot pointed and stared, making Kyle glad he didn’t know many people in the area anymore.
“Martin’s promised to give up the practice as soon as God sends someone who’ll do it for him. It may be selfish of me”—Esther shot him a sideways glance—“but I’m hoping he’s found that someone in you. Forty years is a long time. He deserves a break.”
“He certainly does.” That doesn’t mean it needs to be me. I certainly wouldn’t be anyone’s answer to prayer.
As Esther drove, Kyle almost drifted off to sleep. Not only because he was physically drained, but because coming back here had hit him hard emotionally.
The jangle of a phone startled him.
“Would you mind answering that?” Esther asked. “It’s Martin’s ringtone.”
Kyle mumbled a groggy hello.
Dr. Hess’s jovial welcome boomed through the phone, and Kyle held it away from his ear.
“Glad you arrived safely. Could you ask Esther to come to Enos Fisher’s?”
“We’ll be there shortly, Martin,” Esther called out. She smiled apologetically at Kyle. “I was hoping you’d get a bit more rest before Martin dragged you around on house calls.”
“It’s all right. I’m used to it. The lack of sleep, I mean.” He’d never done house calls. That would be a first.
As Esther wound her way out into the country, the neat brown squares of harvested fields resembled giant patchwork quilts, like the multicolored ones flapping on some clotheslines they passed. Kyle’s heart sank. He’d forgotten how isolated some of these farms were. And the outbuildings reminded him of parties at an Amish barn and…
He released a sigh as Esther bumped down a dirt lane toward a neat white farmhouse surrounded by rows of chopped-down cornstalks. Behind a wooden fence, cows lowed in the field, and when he opened the car door, the crisp fall air carried the earthy scent of farmland. Kyle inhaled deeply. The familiar sights and sounds made his eyes misty. Though he and Caleb had grown up Englisch and had lived in town, they’d spent time on friends’ farms, and Kyle had visited one Amish house more times than he could count.
He shook off the nostalgia. Being here with the doctor meant he needed to appear professional. He pasted on a neutral, businesslike expression.
Esther stepped past him and hurried onto the wooden porch. “Yoo-hoo,” she called through the screen door.
A little boy of about four, with a bowl haircut, pushed open the door. His black pants and suspenders signaled they’d come to an Amish home. Kyle’s stomach clenched. Not only his first house call. His first time entering an Amish home since…
“We left the door open so you could come in.” The boy’s eyes widened as they traveled up Kyle’s height. “You’re tall.”
“Yes, he is.” Esther stepped into the living room. “How’s baby Aaron?”
His older sister, who appeared to be about eight, came up behind him and smiled shyly. She wore a long dress and had her hair twisted on the sides and pulled back into a bun. “He’ll get better now that Leah’s here. She brought some ingredients to help Mamm. They’re in the kitchen.”
“Oh, good. Did you stay home from school today?”
The young girl shook her head. “I only came home during lunchtime to watch Aaron while Mamm and Daed meet with Leah.”
Esther motioned for Kyle to follow her down the hall. “You’ll get to meet Leah, our midwife-in-training. The two of you will work together on high-risk preg— um, high-risk cases.” She leaned over and whispered so the children couldn’t hear. “Amish women never mention they’re expecting, especially not to men and children.”
Kyle frowned. “I’d think it would be obvious.”
“That may be, but no one talks about it. I hope you’ll respect that.”
Once again, Esther acted as if he’d already agreed to take over the practice. They crossed the threshold to a large, spacious kitchen with a hand-hewn wooden table capable of seating ten. Dr. Hess sat on one of the chairs, waiting patiently as several women and girls bustled around.
Whew! Onions and cayenne pepper stung Kyle’s nose and eyes. The odor didn’t remind him of typical Amish cooking. A young woman who appeared to be in her midtwenties and about eight months pregnant stepped over to the stove carrying what looked like a piece of nylon stocking.
“Are you ready for this, Leah?” she asked an attractive Amish girl stirring a pot on the stove.
“Not quite. Could you hand me the herbs and essential oils?”
The young mother obliged, and the girl—Leah?—took the pot off the stove before adding some ingredients to the mixture she was stirring.
A small girl who couldn’t have been more than five staggered into the kitchen, carrying a heavy bundle wrapped in blankets. “Here’s Aaron, Mamm.”
She was holding a baby? Sucking in a breath, Kyle rushed across the kitchen floor to rescue the dangling infant. Before he reached them, Dr. Hess turned around and held out his arms.
“I’ll take him.” The doctor slid a hand under the baby. He didn’t seem at all perturbed that the girl could have dropped the child.
Kyle’s heart banged against his chest at the near accident, but the expectant mother only smiled and thanked the little girl for bringing her brother to the doctor. The girl had called her Mamm, so she and the baby must both belong to this woman.
“This baby is yours?” Kyle could barely keep the shock from his voice. “He’s only about a year old.”
“Eleven months,” the mother corrected, her words soft and gentle.
Eleven months? And she was about to have another soon. Kyle almost asked when her next baby was due, but recalling Esther’s caution, he clamped his mouth shut.
After the little girl partially undressed the baby, Dr. Hess lowered the stethoscope to the infant’s chest. His face grave, he slid the chest piece around several times. Then, while propping the baby’s chest against his hand, he touched the stethoscope to various spots on the baby’s back. He rewrapped the child in blankets and beckoned for Kyle to take his place on the chair.
“See what you think.” The doctor set one hand on the baby to keep him from rolling off the table and held out the stethoscope with the other.
The look in his eyes challenged Kyle. Was this a test of competence? His nervous fingers closed around the earpieces. Overcoming his squeamishness about using someone else’s equipment, he fumbled to insert the ear tips and then set the diaphragm against the infant’s tiny chest. The crackling, bubbling, and rumbling coming through the chest piece as the baby wheezed left no doubt of the diagnosis.
To keep from blurting out the answer, Kyle fiddled with the earpieces as he waited for Dr. Hess to reposition the baby. Kyle had no need to listen to the child’s back, but to look professional, he finished the exam. His eyes sought Dr. Hess’s before he announced, “Pneumonia.”
Dr. Hess nodded.
“I know.” Leah, who’d been stirring the smelly mixture in the pot, motioned for the mother to hold out the nylon bag so she could spoon the mush into it. “That’s why we’re making this poultice.” With a quick motion, she wrapped the nylon in a towel and hurried to the table.
She practically elbowed Kyle out of the way as she reached for the baby. With deft movements, she placed the stinking mixture on the baby’s chest, quickly redressed him, and swaddled him in warm blankets. “This should help.”
“Help?” Kyle’s eyes burned from the sharp stench rising from the infant’s body, and he choked. “That child belongs in a hospital.”
“Hospital?” Leah shot him an incredulous glance. “How could his mamm be with him? She shouldn’t be jolting all that way to the hospital, and who’d care for the children?”
Kyle couldn’t believe his ears. “Children under age two are at the greatest risk—” He broke off when Dr. Hess jiggled his arm. Snapping his mouth shut, Kyle waited for the doctor to speak. This was still Dr. Hess’s case, after all. Just because he’d allowed Kyle to offer a diagnosis, it didn’t mean Kyle should take over.
“I’ll put the baby in the cradle.” Leah looked at the mother, who nodded.
Dr. Hess held out a hand to stop her, and Kyle released a pent-up sigh. The doctor would explain the need for hospitalization. Instead he gestured toward Kyle. “Before you go, Leah, I’d like you to meet Kyle. I’m hoping to convince him to take over my practice.”
Leah ducked her head and mumbled a brief greeting. She refused to meet his eyes, which might be just as well, because his face likely would reveal how upset he was about the home remedy. Pneumonia wasn’t something to fool around with, especially not in infants.
“Kyle, you’ll be working closely with Leah. She’s in training to be a midwife, and she makes many effective herbal remedies.”
Kyle managed to say, “Pleased to meet you,” but he wasn’t sure how true that was.
Dr. Hess might trust Leah’s homemade brews, but when Kyle graduated from medical school, he’d taken an oath promising his patients’ health would always be his foremost consideration. So how could he stand here and let her smear a stinky concoction on a baby’s chest when that child should be taken to the hospital?
He could never allow anyone to harm a baby. Never.
Chapter Three
Kyle. Leah’s arms tightened around the baby, and her heart quickened. She averted her gaze because, if she met Kyle’s eyes, he might read the guilt in hers. Or worse yet, remember the part she’d played that dreadful night. After he’d left town years ago, she’d buried her fear that he’d discover the truth. Now he was here in this kitchen, close enough to touch. Leah struggled to control her trembling, to put the past out of her mind, to concentrate on the darling baby in her arms.
Although she avoided meeting Kyle’s eyes, she couldn’t help noting his pursed lips. He appeared to be pinching back a retort, and his nose had wrinkled when she’d put the onion poultice on baby Aaron’s chest. She suspected Kyle’s expression wasn’t only a reaction to the strong smell. Definitely not a good sign. The last thing they needed was a doctor who didn’t understand Amish ways.
His half-hearted greeting proved he felt as wary of her as she did of him. Having Kyle Miller back in the community would be difficult enough, but having to work with him during deliveries would be torture. Any moment he might glance at her and…
The baby emitted a phlegmy cough, and Leah tipped him upright and patted his back to ease his breathing. Beside her, Kyle’s body tensed as if he wanted to snatch Aaron from her. Leah swished past him before he could make a move and headed for the cradle in the back bedroom.
When she reached the room, she shut the door behind her to give herself some time to recover. Her breathing was as labored as the baby’s. Kyle hadn’t looked at her closely. If he did, would he remember that time their eyes locked and both their worlds changed forever? Leah didn’t want to take that chance.
From the brief glimpse she had of him, Kyle looked too slick and polished to return to a small farming community. Why would he even want to come back after what happened? Although the Amish would never hold his past against him, few in their area would visit his office or invite him into their homes if he refused to accept their way of life.
As much as she wanted to see Dr. Hess enjoy retirement—he worked much too hard—Kyle Miller was the last person she’d want to take his place. The first chance she got, she’d recommend that Dr. Hess find a different assistant. Seeing Kyle again made her realize she couldn’t work with him. Not only did they have totally different ideas on how to handle illness, but being around him sent waves of guilt over her. Kyle might never remember what she’d done, but the shame of that night was burned indelibly into her memory.
Rather than settling baby Aaron in the cradle, Leah sank onto the nearby bed and cuddled him close. For years, she’d yearned to have a family of her own, but holding babies like this had been her only chance to hug little ones. Blinking back tears, she patted Aaron’s back as he coughed. Now that she’d started dating Ben, she’d begun to hope someday he’d be her husband and they’d have a family. That possibility could become a reality…if only they could start agreeing on things.
Ben didn’t want her being a midwife, but Leah was determined to show him she could make their relationship and her career work. So far, they’d crossed a few hurdles and managed to stay together. The fall months would be busier than usual with weddings, babies, and illnesses, making it a challenge to find time to be together.
“Leah?” Dr. Hess’s voice boomed through the house, and she jumped, startling baby Aaron, whose thin wail came out choked.
She lifted him to her shoulder, breathing shallowly to avoid getting a strong whiff of the onion, and rubbed his back. “Be right there,” she called back as she waited for Aaron’s spate of coughing to subside. When he’d quieted, she propped him in the cradle to make it easie. . .
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The Amish Midwife's Secret
Rachel J. Good
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