Not the Marrying Kind
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Synopsis
Small-town florist Ashley Gaines loves her little flower shop and putting together the perfect bouquets for weddings and other happy occasions. Her own love life, however, is far from blossoming. Ash has decided that staying in the closet is safer than risking her heart again.
Local bakery owner Sasha Peterson hasn't had much luck mixing it up with romance either. Besides, she's too busy whipping up delicious treats to have time for a relationship. But when their town's first lesbian wedding forces them to work together, Ashley and Sasha discover they have more in common than they imagined.
During food fights, cake tastings, and slow waltzes, they begin to see each other in a new light. Soon Ashley has to admit to herself that Sasha is tempting more than just her sweet tooth.
Contains mature themes.
Release date: May 1, 2019
Publisher: Ylva Publishing
Print pages: 332
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Behind the book
Awards:
- Rainbow Award Winner 2018/19 (19th place Best Lesbian Book)
- GCLS Literary Award finalist 2020 (Ann Bannon Popular Choice Award)
- IPPY Award (silver) in the Best Romance/Erotica E-Book category 2020
Author updates
Not the Marrying Kind
Jae
CHAPTER 1
Sasha pushed through the swinging door connecting the kitchen to the front of the bakery and placed the tray of heart-shaped cupcakes into the glass display case. “That’s the last tray. Who knew my heart would be such a hot commodity?”
Aunt Mae grinned. “Oh, I knew it all along. There’d be plenty of people interested in capturing your heart if only you’d let them.”
“Nah.” Sasha wrapped one arm around her aunt. She had to lean down to do so. “Who needs romance when they can have cupcakes?”
Aunt Mae gave her the look over the rim of her green-tinted glasses—the one that had gotten Sasha to spill the beans about whatever mischief she’d gotten into as a kid. “Who says you can’t have both? Find a good-looking hunk or a pretty gal and eat cupcakes with them.” She winked and added, “Or eat other, more interesting things.”
Sasha burst out laughing. “No, thanks. There’s no one in this town that I want to eat cupcakes with, much less anything else.”
The bell above the door jingled a welcome, and Ashley Gaines stepped into A Slice of Heaven.
Sasha never wore a watch when she was working, but she didn’t need one to know it was three o’clock. Ashley came in every day at three on the dot, when the afternoon lull hit or, during busy times like today, when she needed a break. She was as regular as clockwork, and she always ordered the same thing. Ashley Gaines was nothing if not predictable.
“Hi, Ash,” Kimberly called from where she sat having coffee with her boyfriend.
The other customers sitting at the small tables echoed the greeting, and Ashley returned it with waves and warm smiles, stopping here and there to exchange a few words.
That was the same as every day too. It reminded Sasha of high school, when Ashley, two years ahead of Sasha, had been part of the popular crowd. Back then, she had been class president, head cheerleader—and the quarterback’s girlfriend.
Everyone had thought they’d get married right out of high school, but for some reason, that hadn’t happened. Maybe Ashley wasn’t that predictable after all.
Sasha watched as Ashley finally tore herself away from her fan club and made her way over to the counter. She walked like a dancer, carrying herself with an inherent grace Sasha had envied back in high school. Ashley had skipped that awkward, gangly teenager phase, while Sasha had been the tallest person in her class and had felt about as elegant as a lumberjack.
Even now, at thirty-three, Ashley looked like the nice girl next door in her formfitting, purple sweater and a pair of jeans with a couple of green stains. Sasha couldn’t help noticing how nicely they hugged Ashley’s curvy hips and showcased her long legs.
Okay, she admitted to herself, maybe what she had felt back in high school hadn’t been just envy. Maybe a smidgen of teenage lust had been mixed in too. But now she would rather eat nothing but gas station donuts for a month than get involved with Ashley Gaines, even if Ash weren’t the straightest woman in Missouri. If Sasha ever started a relationship, she wanted it to be with a person who was fun and spontaneous, and Ashley was far too focused on her nice-girl image and doing what people expected of her.
“Hi, Ashley,” Sasha said. “What can I do to make your taste buds happy today?”
Ashley gave her the same friendly smile she had directed at everyone else. Her strikingly white teeth shone against her face that was still slightly tanned from helping out on her father’s farm all summer. “The usual, please.”
“Oh, come on. It’s Valentine’s Day. Aren’t you feeling even a little adventurous?”
Ashley hesitated and studied the confections on the other side of the glass.
Sasha couldn’t resist teasing her. Ms. Goody-Two-Shoes was always such easy bait. “How about a Sweet Kiss?”
Ashley blinked. “Um…”
“Or would you prefer something hotter?”
“Pardon me?”
Sasha gave her an innocent smile and gestured at the heart-shaped cupcakes as if she had been talking about them all along. “The Sweet Kiss ones are chocolate with salted caramel frosting. Or if you’re not in the mood for something sweet, how about a spicy cheddar muffin?”
Ashley brushed back a blonde strand that had escaped her ponytail, but the gesture couldn’t hide the blush coloring her cheeks.
Kind of cute. Sasha bit back a groan at the thought. That lingering attraction to Ashley was really annoying.
“Um, no, thanks,” Ashley said. “I think I’ll go with my usual vanilla cupcake.”
Yeah, that was Ashley. Totally vanilla. Sasha suppressed a chuckle.
“Plus two espresso chocolate chip cookies for Brooke and a Beagle Bite for Casper, of course,” Ashley added.
“Of course.” Ashley never forgot to buy treats for her employee or her dog. Sasha took a paper box with the bakery’s logo and reached for one of the vanilla cupcakes with strawberry buttercream frosting.
“You know what?” Ashley said.
Sasha looked up. Would Ashley surprise her after all? “What?”
“Make that two vanilla cupcakes. I think I need the extra sugar today.”
Sasha gave her a questioning look, but Ashley didn’t elaborate. Not that Sasha had expected her to. They had never exchanged confidences. She placed a second cupcake in the box and put the cookies and the doggie treat for Ashley’s golden retriever into two separate bags. “Anything else I can do for you?”
Jeez, why had that come out sounding so flirty?
Ashley didn’t seem to notice. “No, thanks.” She put the exact change on the counter without having to ask how much she owed Sasha. “See you tomorrow for my cupcake break.”
“See ya.” Sasha took the money without looking at it, her gaze following Ashley as she walked away.
At the door, Ashley nearly ran into Leo and Holly, who had been about to enter.
“Oh, hi, Ash,” Holly said. “How are you doing?”
“Um, great. Keeping busy. You know how it is—Valentine’s Day is always crazy.”
“Is it okay if we add to the craziness? Could you make up a bouquet of gerbera daisies for Leo’s mom and some tulips for mine?” Holly asked. “We’ll be by to collect them right after we get ourselves a snack.”
“Oh, sure. I’ll get right on that. See you later.” Without waiting for a reply, Ashley hurried down the street toward her flower shop.
Sasha stared after her. For someone who had been close friends with both Leo and Holly at one point, Ashley never seemed completely at ease chatting with them, making Sasha wonder if she was uncomfortable with their sexual orientation.
“Hey, guys,” Sasha said as Holly and Leo walked up to the counter. “Are you having a great Valentine’s Day?”
“The best ever,” they answered in unison.
Sasha playfully rolled her eyes at them. “God, you two are so stinking cute together. You sound like an old, married couple.”
They traded a long gaze.
“Um, about that…” Holly sent Leo a questioning look. “What do you think? Should we tell her our news now or wait until later, when she’s not so busy?”
“News? There’s news in this town, and I haven’t heard about it yet?” Sasha opened her eyes comically wide. “Wow. The Fair Oaks rumor mill really isn’t what it used to be.” She took an apricot-orange cream scone and put it in a bag without asking what Holly and Leo wanted. They, too, always ordered the same. “So, what’s the news?”
Holly leaned forward as if about to share a secret. The ear-to-ear grin on her face made Sasha think it had to be something good. “We’re getting married.”
A second scone and Sasha’s pair of silver tongs landed on the counter with a clatter, making several customers look over. Sasha didn’t care. She wiped her hands on her baker’s apron, rushed around the counter, and engulfed first Holly, then Leo in a warm hug. “That’s wonderful. I’m so happy for you guys!”
As soon as she let go, Aunt Mae hurried over and hugged them too. “Did you propose today?” She looked from Holly to Leo and back.
“I wanted to.” Holly laughed. “I had it all planned out. A romantic stroll along the creek before heading to Tasty Barn for a candlelit dinner, and when we got to the bridge, I wanted to drop down on one knee and ask her to marry me. But Leo beat me to it last night.” She held out her hand, showing off her engagement ring with a single, beautiful diamond.
“I wanted to do it on Valentine’s Day too, but then I thought that might be a little too cheesy, even for someone who writes sappy love songs for a living.” The corners of Leo’s mouth curved up into an embarrassed smile. A ring that looked nearly identical to Holly’s sparkled on her finger. “Plus I just couldn’t wait any longer.”
“Wow. You both planned to propose without the other knowing? Great minds think alike.” Sasha had never really believed in all that happily-ever-after stuff, but seeing the obvious love radiating off her friends, she was almost considering changing her mind. “So when’s the happy day?”
“We were thinking the first Saturday in May. It’s my parents’ wedding date, and my mom loved the idea when we told her over breakfast,” Holly said. “Plus it’s not too hot in May.”
Sasha nodded her approval. Elaborate wedding cakes and summer heat didn’t mix well.
“We want something small and low-key, not a big, fancy production, so we’re not going to have an official maid of honor or bridesmaids with identical dresses or anything like that, but…” Holly traded a look with Leo, who gave her a tiny nod. “We’d like you to be part of our wedding party.”
Warmth spread through Sasha, as if she had just taken a bite of a cinnamon roll fresh out of the oven. “I’d be honored.”
“And we’d love for you to make our wedding cake,” Leo added.
“Of course,” Sasha said without even consulting her order book first. “Any idea what kind of cake you want?”
Holly and Leo again exchanged gazes before Holly said, “Not yet. But my mom thinks it’s a good idea for the baker and the florist to collaborate closely so the cake and the flowers match both in color and design. Maybe we could all get together at our place in a week or two and talk about the details.”
“Yeah, sure. Who’ll do the flowers? Blossoms from Kansas City?”
“Um, no,” Holly answered. “We want Ash to do it. We haven’t asked her yet, but I hope she’ll agree.”
Ash… It shouldn’t have thrown her for a loop. Not only was The Flower Girl the only floral shop in town, but Ashley had also been friends with both brides-to-be in the past. Still, the prospect of having to work with Ashley was more unsettling than Sasha cared to admit, and she couldn’t even say why exactly.
“That’s not a problem, is it?” Holly asked when Sasha remained silent.
“No, of course not.” If Ms. Prim-and-Proper was willing to work a lesbian wedding with her, there wouldn’t be a problem at all. Sasha had worked with dozens of other wedding professionals over the years, and it had always gone without a hitch. Why would this time be any different?
* * *
“If anyone else walks in here and orders a dozen red roses, I’m going to scream.” As the latest in a long string of rose-buying customers disappeared down the street, Ashley sank against the counter and stretched her aching back.
Brooke, her part-time employee, laughed, making the small hoop in her nose vibrate. “Yeah, me too. It’s so lame. They all say they want something special and unique for V-Day—and then they order the most cliché thing ever.”
“Well, at least we’re making good money today.” Her little shop really needed that since business was always slow in January.
“Yeah,” Brooke said. “It’s the day of overpriced chocolates and guilt-trip flowers that people only buy because they’re supposed to.”
Ash circled the counter to choose the most beautiful gerbera daisies for the bouquet Holly had ordered. “Wow. That’s kind of jaded for a nineteen-year-old, don’t you think? You sound like—”
“Like you?”
“Me?” Ash shook her head. “I never said anything like that. I merely mentioned that it would be more logical if Valentine’s Day were in summer, when roses are actually in bloom. But aside from that practical consideration, I’m a romantic at heart.”
“A romantic who hasn’t had a date since way before I started working here.”
Ash turned away under the pretense of getting sprigs of eucalyptus and some bear grass for the bouquet. This was exactly why Valentine’s Day was both a blessing and a curse for her. The most romantic day of the year was a reminder that she was alone and would likely stay that way. She forced a smile as she returned to her workstation and faced Brooke. “Is my mother paying you to say that?”
Brooke grinned and brushed back the long side bang hanging over one eye. “Ooh! You think she would? I need all the money I can get to be able to leave this town and go away to college.”
Before Ash could answer, the bell above the door announced another customer.
Barry Clemons, the owner of the grain and feed, stepped into the shop and shook drops of rain and sleet off his coat. “Brr. Hi, Ashley. Can’t wait for spring. Bet your dad says the same.”
“He does. You know him. Every year after harvest, he swears he’ll finally take Mom on vacation, but by the time January and February come around, he can’t wait to get back in the fields.”
Barry chuckled, then sobered. “How are your folks? Must be a tough time of year for them.”
Ash smiled through the stab of pain and sent a glance to the customer who had come in right after Barry. Thankfully, Mrs. Mitchell was busy looking at the orchids and the potted hydrangeas and didn’t seem to be listening in on their conversation. “They’re okay. Staying busy fixing tractors and doing barn repairs. Dad is even helping me out with deliveries today because we have so many online orders that my driver can’t do it all. So, how can I help you?”
“I thought I’d get some flowers,” Barry said.
“Captain Obvious,” Brooke muttered under her breath.
Ash nudged her behind the cover of the counter. The customer was king, even though it was kind of obvious that he was here for flowers.
“What were you thinking of?” Ash asked.
He looked around the shop, which today wasn’t as neat and orderly as Ash usually tried to keep it. The floor was dirty from the many customers who’d come in since seven this morning, when she had opened the shop two hours earlier than usual. She hadn’t had much of a chance to tidy up her work area, so trimmings of stems and stripped leaves formed piles behind the counter. One of the adorable plush teddy bears had toppled over on the shelf, as if it had gotten tired waiting for someone to take it home. A heart-shaped balloon had escaped from the flower basket it had been tied to, and now it dangled from the ceiling.
Barry’s gaze went from the floating balloon to the bouquets Ash had prepared for walk-in customers. Then he paused on Brooke and looked at her as if he had never seen her before even though she’d worked for Ash since the previous summer. A deep groove formed between his brows as he took in Brooke’s nose ring, her kohl-rimmed eyes, and the edgy haircut, short except for a sweeping side bang that almost obscured her left eye.
Brooke met his gaze as if she didn’t care what he thought of her.
Ash couldn’t help admiring her. At Brooke’s age, all she had wanted was to fit in and avoid anything that could make her the subject of gossip again—and that hadn’t changed now that she was an adult.
Finally, Barry turned toward the walk-in cooler that took up most of one wall. In it, cut flowers were arranged in metal buckets. “A dozen red roses, please.”
Brooke rolled her eyes in that way only teenagers could.
Ash nudged her again. “Why don’t you go see if you can help Mrs. Mitchell?” When Brooke trudged away, Ash turned back to Barry. “Roses are always a great choice. I bet Heather will love them. Would you like them wrapped or in a vase?”
“Wrapped, please.” Barry watched while Ash pulled a rose from one of the buckets.
She formed a circle with her thumb and index finger and started slotting flowers into it at an angle, constantly rotating the bouquet as she added more roses and some baby’s breath. Finally, she created a frill around the bouquet with some leatherleaf fern and held her creation out to Barry for his approval.
He nodded. “Looks great. Thanks.”
Ash wrapped the stems with floral tape and trimmed them to an even length.
“Could you make up another bouquet and wrap them too?” Barry asked.
Flowers for his mother? How sweet. Ash smiled. “Sure. Roses too?”
Barry shrugged. “Anything will do. You pick.” He rifled through his wallet while he waited and put his credit card down on the counter. But then he paused and added a couple of bills. He glanced back over his shoulder at Brooke and Mrs. Mitchell. “Um, I’ll pay cash for the roses, if you don’t mind.”
Ash froze with her hand extended toward a bucket of peonies. Jesus. How much more obvious could he be? She schooled her face and tried to keep smiling, but it wasn’t easy.
God knew, she had thoroughly messed up her one and only relationship as an adult, but she had never, ever cheated.
Ash turned away from the peonies and picked yellow carnations and pink snapdragon instead. Heather probably wouldn’t know that the flowers in her bouquet symbolized disappointment and deception, but at least Ash could imagine that she was warning her in some way, saying through flowers what she would never dare voice.
A few minutes later, Barry left, cradling the two bouquets and holding the door open for Mrs. Mitchell and her potted hydrangea.
Brooke stared after him. “Did he just…?”
Ash sighed. “Yeah, I think so.”
“What an ass. Who do you think it is? The chick he’s hooking up with, I mean.”
“I don’t know, and I don’t want to know.” Ash really liked Fair Oaks and the people in this little town—well, most people, most of the time—but the one thing she despised was gossip.
“I bet it’s Cora. I’ve seen her head into the feed and grain a couple of times, and I don’t think she was there for the corn. She’s a postal worker, for fuck’s sake.”
“Poor Heather,” Ash said. “She probably has no idea that he’s giving her a bunch of ‘anything will do’ while sending red roses to another woman.”
“Oh, don’t worry. She’ll find out like this.” Brooke snapped her fingers. “This is Fair Oaks after all. Secrets don’t stay secret here for very long.”
A chill skittered down Ash’s spine, making the air in the flower shop appear even cooler. Her own secret had nearly come out a year and a half before, when Travis had told their former classmates about her car being parked in front of Holly’s house all night long. But that relationship had ended years ago, and everyone had probably dismissed Travis’s suspicions as his dirty little fantasies.
She was safe, especially since she had decided that another relationship wasn’t worth the risk. She’d stay far, far away from the women of Fair Oaks…which was easy to do since they were all straight.
Well, all except for the two women who were now entering the shop to collect the bouquets they had ordered.
Holly was the first to step inside, while Leo hung back, her guarded pop star mask firmly in place.
Was she still angry with Ash? There had been a time when Ash could read her well, but that had been back in high school, when they had been best friends. They hadn’t exchanged more than a quick hello in the year and a half since Ash had tried to warn her away from Holly. It had been a stupid move, caused by hurt and jealousy; she could admit that now, at least to herself.
She was over it. Okay, mostly over it. She swallowed against the lump in her throat as she watched them walk toward her, hand in hand.
Seeing them together was always a little weird. The first girl she had ever kissed dating the first—and only—woman she’d ever been in a relationship with… It was mind-boggling.
But they looked good together, Ash had to admit. Happy.
Brooke watched them approach with a grin. “Let me guess. You want a dozen red roses?”
Ash sent her a warning glance. She really had to talk to Brooke. If Brooke wanted to keep working for her, she would have to learn to hold her tongue in front of customers.
“Um, no.” With her free hand that wasn’t holding on to Leo’s, Holly pointed at the bouquet Ash was still working on. “Actually, I think this one is for us.”
The light caught on a ring glistening on Holly’s left ring finger.
The ribbon Ash had been about to tie around the gerbera stems dropped to the worktable. A gasp escaped her, and she stared at Holly’s hand. As a nurse, Holly had never been one to wear any jewelry, especially not a tasteful but obviously expensive diamond ring. Her gaze darted to Leo’s hand, which sported a similar ring. “Oh my God! Is…is that…? Are you…?”
Holly curled her hand around the ring as if to protect it. A flush of joy colored her cheeks. “I know today is crazy for you. That’s why I didn’t want to say anything today. But if Brooke could hold down the fort for a minute, maybe we could go and talk in the back.”
“Okay,” was the only word Ash could get out.
Leo still hadn’t said a word as Ash led them around the counter and through the open door into the back room.
Casper, Ash’s golden retriever, jumped out of his doggie bed and rushed over to greet them.
Ash was grateful for the distraction so she could get herself together. The low buzz of the flower cooler compressor filled her ears—or maybe it was the chaotic thoughts tumbling through her mind.
Brooke had stared after them, but now she quickly busied herself rearranging the greeting cards next to the counter, affecting a look of sullen teenage disinterest.
Ash didn’t buy it for a second. She closed the curtain that separated the workroom from the front of the shop, which she rarely ever did. For once, she wished for a real door.
With trembling hands, she cleared the small, round table in the corner of bows, little packets of flower food, and floral picks with pink hearts and pushed two chairs and a stool over to it. “Please, sit.” She took the stool and sank onto it.
Casper settled down at her feet as if wanting to lend support.
Leo and Holly sat across from her without letting go of each other’s hand.
Again, Ash’s gaze was drawn to their rings. “You…you’re getting married?”
A joyous smile lit up Holly’s face. “Yes.”
“Wow, that’s…um…” Finally, Ash’s good manners kicked in, and she said, as if on autopilot, “Congratulations. I’m really happy for you.” And she was. But at the same time, so many conflicting thoughts and emotions were crashing down on her that she felt as if she were caught in a hailstorm.
“Thanks.” Holly beamed, and even Leo’s celebrity mask was replaced by a warm smile.
They radiated so much happiness that Ash had to look away. How could they be so happy with their sexual orientation, while Ash still struggled with hers? She couldn’t imagine ever getting to a point where she would want to celebrate her love for a woman with a big event that would probably include the entire town.
“We would both really like it if you would come to our wedding and also do our flowers,” Holly said.
Ash peered over at them from under half-lowered lashes. “Are you sure?”
“If you’d rather not do a wedding between two women because of what people—or your parents—might say…” Leo said.
That concern had crossed Ash’s mind. Her parents and some of her more conservative customers wouldn’t be too happy about her being involved in a same-sex wedding, but that wasn’t why she hesitated. “No, that’s not it.” She lowered her gaze to the table. “I mean, after what I said about Holly, I would completely understand if you’d rather use a florist in Kansas City.”
For several seconds, no one answered.
Casper let out a low whine as if sensing the rising tension.
Ash looked up. Oh shit. Unlike Ash, Holly had never been one to hide her emotions, and now it was written all over her face that she hadn’t known about Ash’s careless words.
Both Ash and Leo opened their mouths, but before either of them could say anything, Holly lifted her hand. “I don’t want to know. It doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it matters,” Leo said, heat in her eyes.
“Leo, after everything that happened—your father dying, you firing your manager, and me finally understanding that I can have a happy relationship despite being asexual—I thought we agreed that we don’t want to hang on to any bitter feelings from the past. That’s part of why we want to get married, right? To have a new beginning—and that includes a new beginning for you and Ash too.”
Tears burned in Ash’s eyes. She hadn’t expected that Holly of all people would defend her to Leo. It made her feel even worse about the words she’d spoken in anger. “I know I owe you an apology. Both of you.” She glanced from Leo to Holly and back. “I was hurt and bitter, blaming everyone else for the way my life turned out. But I made my peace with it, and I’d really like to make peace with you too.”
“I’d really like that too,” Holly said softly. “I always regretted losing our friendship, and I’d like to work on getting it back.”
Ash was speechless. She hadn’t expected to be invited back into Holly’s life. Maybe she should have known better. Holly had always possessed the biggest heart of anyone she knew.
Holly squeezed Leo’s hand. “What do you think, honey?”
Leo looked down at her hand that was joined with Holly’s, and when she gazed back up, her tense features had relaxed. “I think you’re right.” She exhaled and looked Ash in the eyes. “You were once an important person in my life. In both of our lives. I won’t lie. It’ll take a lot of work to get that friendship back, but we have to start somewhere. Would you be a part of our wedding and also do the flowers?”
Snippets of what her parents and the more conservative people in town would say echoed through Ash’s head. She shook off those thoughts. If she wanted to earn back Holly’s and Leo’s friendship, she had to do something to deserve it. “I would be honored.”
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