I watched from the back of my horse in the front paddock under a gray winter sky (yeah, right, like I was my brothers, all broody and whiny—gimme a break) as a big blue GMC Sierra raced up the lane to stop right smack-dab in front of my house.
My family had been a little on edge, so it was no surprise to me when my older brother, Dean, appeared on our front porch with a shotgun aimed at the driver of the unknown truck as he emerged from the cab.
I was too far away to see or hear what the blond-haired, sexy-bodied man said. Yeah, so maybe I needed glasses, but I still had a pretty good view of the shape of him ’cause he wasn’t wearin’ a coat. Tall, lean, invitin’—fuckable, if he happened to swing that way, which he wouldn’t ’cause this was Wyoming—but he raised his hands in front of his chest and advanced slowly.
After a few seconds, my brother lowered his gun, and his girlfriend, Oly Masterson, emerged from the house in her pink pajamas and snow boots, squealed (I heard that), threw her hands up into the air, and ran down the porch stairs toward the stranger. She jumped into his arms and he hugged her close.
My brother and Oly had just gotten back together after a long time apart, like, literally a couple days ago, so I was a little confused as to why Dean didn’t pummel the guy into the snow. To my surprise, the guy released Oly, and she grabbed his hand as they climbed the porch stairs, and all three of ’em went into my house like they were BFFs.
The guy looked hot and I was curious, so I fed Classic some hay, leavin’ him happy in his stall, and stalked up the gravel lane leadin’ to my house to investigate. I still had an air cast on my right leg from a break three months before, and I had to cover it with a stupid rubber boot and eight damn socks so my toes didn’t freeze off, so I hobbled a little like an idiot, but I finally made my way to the porch.
When I pushed the kitchen door open and barreled in like I always did, my whole body was assaulted with the sounds, scents, and sights of my nightmares. Or my dreams.
I couldn’t fuckin’ decide.
I heard my brother introducin’ the guy to my family.
“… and this is Ma.” Dean stepped away, and I saw the sexified stranger extendin’ his hand to my best friend, my surrogate mama.
“Hallo, mam. Pleasure to meet you. Luuk van der Wouden.” It sounded kinda like he said Leuk Vandervoouden, like he described himself as lukewarm, but he wasn’t. He was hot AF. I hadn’t even seen his face yet, but his body… Good grief.
Ma held out her small hand and he clasped it gently, givin’ it the tiniest of shakes.
This had to be Oly’s friend from veterinary school. She’d been expectin’ him.
“Luke?”
“No, mam, Luuk. Think of it as L-E-U-K, but you can call me whatever you like. My English friends call me LV. Except Carolina.” He turned his perfectly coiffed blond head to the side to smirk at Oly, and I choked on my own spit. Just the side of his face, with his dimple and his full lips—oh my God. And the sound of his voice? Pure fuckin’ sex, even with the weird accent.
“Well, aren’t you a charmer,” Ma cooed, sittin’ back in the old brown recliner in the livin’ room. “LV? Sounds like Alvie. Maybe that’s what I’ll call you.” She laughed. “Well, Alvie, this is Jay, Dean’s youngest brother, and have you met Carey?” She motioned to the two dumbasses sittin’ on the floor.
“Hallo, good to meet you, Carey. Jay, it’s nice to meet you as well.”
Jay and Carey stood to shake the guy’s long-fingered hand.
“We spoke on the phone,” Carey said.
“We did?”
“Yeah, I’m Sheriff Michaels. We talked when you called about Oly’s accident the other day.”
“Oh, ja, of course.”
Carey relaxed back on the floor into the ridiculous bean bag chair he’d previously occupied, and the guy smiled, lookin’ a little confused, probably at the super professional image of the Sheriff of Teton County perched in a bean bag chair. Man, we really needed to invest in some new furniture.
“Good to meet you, Luuk,” Jay said. “You hungry? We got enough food to feed an army this mornin’.”
“Sure, sure, ja. I’m actually starving. I have been on the road all night.”
“Luuk, you drove all the way here?” Oly asked. “I thought you flew. That’s not a rental?”
“No. I bought it a few weeks ago. Did I forget to tell you? And ja, I drove straight here. Carolina, I thought you had been highjacked.”
I snorted.
“Carjacked. I tried to call, Lookie Loo. I’m sorry.”
Lookie Loo? What a stupid nickname.
“Ja, but by then, I was somewhere in the middle of— Where am I?” He laughed, and all the blood in my head rushed to my dick when the silky sound of his voice entered my bloodstream through my ears. “I spoke to your parents, but I lost my cell signal. It’s okay. I’m just so relieved you’re not hurt.”
“So, Alvie, where you from?” Ma asked while Jay walked into the kitchen and looked me up and down, standin’ in the middle of the room, frozen, hard, and stupid. What? So maybe I didn’t get out much. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen a guy so hot, though I hoped Jay couldn’t tell what I was thinkin’. I sat at the kitchen table, unlacin’ my boot and removin’ my stupid cast.
“Eh, originally I come from Oudewater, a small farming town, but also we lived in Amsterdam for a short time. In the Netherlands.”
“Have a seat, sweetheart,” Ma said. “Oh, I bet it’s beautiful there. I’ve always wanted to travel. I just never really had the chance. Do your parents still live there?”
“No, mam, they passed when I was fifteen.” He sat on the couch next to my almost-sis-in-law, Evvie, and she smiled and patted his leg.
“I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”
“No, no, mam, please. It was a long time ago.” He smiled a little awkwardly, like maybe he didn’t really wanna talk about his family, but he also didn’t wanna make Ma uncomfortable.
“Oh, honey. Well, who raised you then? Do you have brothers or sisters?” I could hear Ma adoptin’ him in my mind. She kinda tended to do that. Ma—our lady of lost boys.
“No, it’s just me. I stayed in boarding school until I graduated. Then I went to university and then to vet school, where I met Carolina.”
“Oh, you poor dear,” Ma said, and he smiled at her, but somethin’ sad flashed across his face, or at least the half of it I could see. “Well, congratulations on your graduation, Alvie. What an accomplishment.”
He tilted his head a little. “Dank je wel, mam.” He sounded completely taken back by Ma’s praise.
Carey asked, “Boardin’ school, what was that like?”
“It was pretty boring. I found a lot of trouble. I guess you could say I had a habit of trying to make my own fun.”
Carey snickered and Jay laughed, walkin’ back into the livin’ room. He shoved a huge plate of food into Luuk’s hands, and Luuk thanked him. God, that voice. Like a low, relaxin’ hum.
I took the opportunity to walk in there to get a better look at the guy, and when he saw me, he choked on his first bite of bacon and eggs! Hm. Interestin’ development. Did he like what he saw? I sure did.
He was sexy as shit! Blond hair, blue eyes for days, dark eyebrows, and his jawline coulda cut through leather. Shadowy, two-day scruff covered it, framin’ a smile to die for. ’Cept, he didn’t smile. Somethin’ dark and… intense hid behind his eyes. He stared up at me, slack-jawed, and I arched an eyebrow. Oh man.
Catch, fuck, and release.
“Luuk, this is Kevin,” Oly said, and he glanced at her for half a second before lookin’ back at me.
“Hallo, nice”—he lifted his arm to cough into it, clearin’ his throat—“nice to meet you, Kevin.”
I didn’t respond. I just stood there like an idiot, lookin’ at him. I kinda felt like I was stuck in a trance—I couldn’t look away from his aqua-blue eyes.
Finally, Sheriff Dickwad reached over and yanked on my pant leg, and I lost my balance. I tipped over but regained it before fallin’ on my face in front of, literally, the sexiest man I’d ever laid eyes on. I pounced on Carey, took his ass down, pulled his arm around his back, and shoved his face against the wood floor.
Rollin’ me off him, he sat up. “Quit bein’ a jerk. Sit down and join us,” he said, grabbin’ a ridiculously large bucket of popcorn from the floor, shovelin’ a handful in his mouth.
“Fuck you, Sheriff. Did you really get elected, or did the other guy just die? And why you eatin’ popcorn at nine in the mornin’?”
“Kevin Christian Cade, watch your mouth in front of our guests, or I’ll wash it out with soap.”
“Yes, ma’am. Sorry.” Yeah, okay, I wanted to be cool in front of Dutch Hot Guy, but I couldn’t be rude to Ma.
“Nice, Kevin,” Jay said, and Carey smacked the back of my head, causin’ my hair to fall in my face, and I coulda sworn I saw Luuk, outta the corner of my eye, watch me push it away. He licked his lips.
“We’re havin’ a movie marathon. We finally talked Evvie into somethin’ other than Christmas movies.” Carey leaned closer to me. “So fuck you too,” he whispered, thinkin’ he’d be the one to get away with a little profanity.
“Carey Michaels, you may be the sheriff, but I’ll still tan your hide,” Ma scolded. “Show a little decorum, would ya? Jeez-o-pete, what’s the matter with y’all? Buncha hooligans.”
Sexy Luuk chuckled, and I turned away from Carey to face the TV, tryin’ to act like the hottest guy on the planet wasn’t sittin’ right behind me. I felt pretty confident from his physical reactions to me that he thought I was hot, too, and I planned on takin’ full fuckin’ advantage of that.
Contrary to what my brothers believed, I hadn’t had sex with anybody in a long time, and by sheer coincidence, I’d just found the guy to break that unlucky streak.
I sat with my back to him, flexin’ my shoulders while I pretended to watch whatever stupid movie played. I knew he watched me. I felt it, like he had lasers in his eyes and aimed ’em right between my shoulder blades.
A lotta people liked watchin’ me. I’d never had a shortage of admirers. Mostly women, unfortunately, but I knew I looked good, and I still felt his eyes on me as he ate, and everyone else casually asked questions about his life and work while I listened to his every word, plottin’ how I might get him on his knees in some dark, secret spot.
“So, you’re visiting with Oly for New Year’s?” Evvie asked.
“Em, yes. Well, actually, I’m going to work with her at the veterinary clinic. I was supposed to interview with Dr. Prittchard, but now, I will full in to help Carolina while he recovers from his stroke.”
“Fill in, dear,” Ma corrected him. “Isn’t that sweet of you. I’m sure Doc will appreciate the help.” She swooned and I rolled my eyes. Dude sounded like a goody-two-shoes to me. A hot-as-fuck goody-two-shoes, but still.
“Seriously, I can’t thank you enough, Luuk. You are totally savin’ my butt,” Oly said. “I have no idea what I would do if you couldn’t help me. I’ve been a vet for five minutes. I can’t do this by myself.”
“Of course you can, Carolina. But I’m happy to help. Denver was not really working out for me. I much prefer a mixed practice, and the clinic there is strictly small animals. I miss cows and horses.”
“You’re in the right place then,” Jay said, standin’ and steppin’ toward Luuk. “Here, Luuk, lemme get your plate.”
“No, no, please, relax. I need to stretch my legs.” The couch creaked, his clothes rustlin’ when he stood.
“Alright, well, make yourself at home then. Grab a soda or there’s coffee, if you like,” Jay said.
“Dank je wel. Can I get anything for anyone?” he asked, and finally, I sprang up from the floor in one lithe movement and turned to him.
“Yeah, but I’ll get it. Sit, Doc.” I took his empty plate from his hands, makin’ sure to touch my fingers to his, and looked right into his eyes. He kinda fell back down onto the ugly plaid couch, and I smirked but schooled my expression quick. My brothers didn’t know I liked guys, and I wasn’t about to broadcast it.
I wondered if everyone in the room could hear my heartbeat. It pounded in my chest like a bass drum while I stared at him, imaginin’ chasin’ him into the kitchen and takin’ him up against the ancient fridge.
* * *
Luuk stayed in Oly’s little cottage in town, and I didn’t see him again till almost a week later, on the night of Jack and Evvie’s weddin’, New Year’s Eve.
I’d been gettin’ really annoyed with all the endless weddin’ preparations. Somehow, I’d been the one to end up takin’ care of all the horses and the barn, and I needed to let out some steam. I wondered, if I showed up there, just knocked on his front door, would he invite me in? If he was— If he liked guys like I did, maybe he’d welcome the opportunity without havin’ to go lookin’ for the hookup. Or maybe he’d be shy about it.
Fine. Maybe I was shy about it. It wasn’t too often the perfect guy showed up on my doorstep though. Not in Wisper. Probably not in Wyoming, period. But one had, and turned out, he didn’t seem shy about it at all.
Also turned out I was a gigantic dick. Well, everyone knew that already, but Luuk hadn’t.
He was about to find out.
“This stud is magnificent,” Luuk said while I stood behind him, starin’ at his ass in his fancy jeans while he appraised Mad Max, our gargantuan black stallion, in his stall.
Luuk had shown up to the weddin’ in time for the nuptials and stayed after to help clean up and hang out with Dean, Oly, and her parents. I’d gone out to the barn to take care of the horses and close down for the night, and Luuk followed to help. Said he wanted to be useful. I could think of a couple things he might do to be useful to me.
“Yeah, that’s Mad Max. He’s a feisty S.O.B. Jack’s the only one can calm him,” I said, leanin’ back against Hobbs’ stall, crossin’ one boot over the other.
“He’s beautiful. He reminds me of a horse I had when I was a boy. Are you going to breed him?”
“That’s the plan. Jack likes his pedigree, thinks he’ll bring in some money,” I replied as the stupid goofy three-year-old gelding stuck his head over the railin’ behind me, rubbin’ his slobbery horse lips all over my shoulder.
“I am thinking of five people I could call right now who would love a foal from this horse.”
“Yeah? Talk to Jack. He runs the show ’round here.”
He turned real slow, lookin’ down the aisle and back, his eyes dartin’ everywhere but at me, like he was nervous to be alone with me.
“So, em, welk paard rijd je?” He clicked his tongue. “Which horse do you ride?”
“Classic.” I nodded toward my horse’s stall, then headed down in that direction. Luuk followed and stood in the aisle while I stepped in with Classic, my obstinate chestnut gelding with a white star on his forehead.
“He was my dad’s horse. He don’t really like anybody else to ride him, but I guess I’m just stubborn.” I patted Classic’s back and whispered to him to get a load of the hot vet behind me. His big horse ears lifted and turned, listenin’, and he snorted and stomped his hoof. He probably disapproved of my sexual predilection just like my dad woulda.
Luuk and I worked together, feedin’ and waterin’ the horses. With the weddin’ and all the guests on the ranch all day, supper had been late, and the beasts weren’t shy about lettin’ us know. We spoke a few times but not about anything too excitin’. I got the feelin’ he felt uneasy around me, which was very disappointin’ ’cause I was extremely drawn to him. He looked at me, though, a lot. I caught him peekin’ many times.
He peered in at Mad Max again while I went to put the hose away, and like an idiot, I banged my recently broken and metal-pin-infused leg against the water spigot.
“Fuck!”
When he came joggin’ to find me, I sat on the barn floor next to the hose with my eyes closed, clutchin’ my right leg and holdin’ my breath. I knew he was standin’ there. I heard him breathin’, but my leg hurt really bad, and I couldn’t concentrate on bein’ Mr. Cool Guy in the moment. Technically, I shoulda still been wearin’ my stupid air cast, but I was a vain motherfucker.
“Kevin? Are you hurt?”
“I’m fine.”
“You do not look fine,” he argued.
“I’m fine,” I said again and tried to stand, but as soon as I put weight on my right foot, pain shot through my leg down to my goddamn toes. “Shit!”
I lost my balance, and he jumped over to give me somethin’ to lean against. I threw my arm out and grasped his coat in my fist, steadyin’ myself, tryin’ not to fall the fuck over.
“Have you hurt your ankle?”
“No, it’s an old injury. I banged it against that stupid metal spigot. Just smarts is all. Gimme a minute.” I blew out a big breath and inhaled again, holdin’ it in and squeezin’ my eyes shut against the pain.
“Breathe. It will help. It hurts more if you hold your breath.”
I exhaled like he said and he did too. He was breathin’ heavy, and I realized I was still touchin’ him as I opened my eyes and felt the heat from his body on my hand. He watched my face, my lips, and I had to fight the urge to lick his bottom one. He bit it hard, and the sight of his white teeth tearin’ into that plump skin made all the blood in my body travel on a one-way ticket right to my dick. I coulda pounded nails with it.
Well, ow.
Okay, so I coulda pounded somethin’ with it.
Raisin’ his head a little, he released his lip and blew out a slow and steady breath, and his eyes looked right into mine. I was frozen—a mouse in the snake’s snare. Shit. Say something, you idiot. Speak! But I couldn’t. My brain wouldn’t work.
He’d caused some kinda short circuit.
He watched me warily as I inched my face closer to him, and closer still, until my mouth hovered a centimeter from his. I felt his breath against my cheek.
I couldn’t seem to stop myself.
Lookin’ down his body and back up, my eyes raked over his neck as I imagined bitin’ and lickin’ it, and my fingers unzipped his red, ridiculously overstuffed winter coat so slowly. I had no clue what I was doin’, but he didn’t stop me when I placed my hand on his ribs over his shirt.
Oh. My. Fuck.
I wanted to dig my fingers into his skin and slam his body to mine.
My hair brushed against his lips as I looked down at my hand inside his coat. He inhaled and his ribs expanded with the breath. It felt a little choppy, which gave me confidence. I was so hard, if he touched me, I’d blow right there in the middle of my family’s barn.
Liftin’ my head, I looked in his eyes.
What I imagined myself sayin’ sounded sexy and irresistible, but what came outta my mouth was: “Want me, Doc?” He didn’t answer, but his lips quirked just a little. “I think you do. I saw the way you watched me earlier. You like watchin’ my body? Imaginin’ me suckin’ you off? My lips ’round your cock?”
Breathin’ faster and faster, his face was set in deadpan lust, his eyes blue flames, like one of them blue-green driftwood fires.
Touchin’ my nose to the skin beside his bottom lip, I inhaled, drawin’ my breath in slowly and closin’ my eyes as the heady scent of his skin overtook my better instincts (well, the one or two I still had left).
I’d never kissed a man. I’d been with plenty of women, kissed ’em tryin’ to force myself to enjoy it. And I’d been with guys. Well, I’d fucked ’em or they’d sucked me off. But I’d never kissed ’em. Never let ’em kiss me.
Kissin’ Luuk, though? I wanted my tongue in his mouth so damn bad. Even closed, tipped up in a sarcastic, uncertain smirk, with his sexy lips—and God, those dimples—his mouth was my own personal haven.
Or I thought, maybe it could be.
I had just been about to growl like an animal and shove my tongue into the wet, hot Dutch cave of my dreams, when I heard my brother, Finn, callin’ my name, and I froze. I wanted this man like none I’d ever met, but nobody could know it. The guy was a vet in my town, for a little while at least, and I lived and worked on a horse ranch.
What in the world was I thinkin’?
I stood up tall, backed away, and lied, “I know I look good, and you’re welcome to dream, but that’s all it’s gonna be for you. I ain’t a fuckin’ fairy.” I winced as I said the word but pulled my hand away from him and limped outta the barn.
Shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
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