Who Do I Run To?
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Synopsis
A love triangle with a married man spirals out of control in the new contemporary romance novel from bestselling author Anna Black …
Janiece Hawkins never thought she’d find herself involved in a love triangle—especially with a married man. KP, the man of her dreams, sweeps her off her feet long before he tells her he is married with two kids. Too deep in love to let go, she becomes accustomed to being KP’s other woman.
She doesn’t have a problem with her role as KP’s mistress until she meets Isaiah.
He’s ready to commit and make Janiece his. He will stop at nothing to win her over, even though Janiece is stuck on KP.
Things spiral out of control when KP decides it’s time to leave Kimberly, his wife, to be with Janiece. The drama kicks into high gear when Isaiah fights to have Janiece, and Kimberly also fights to keep KP. The ultimate decision has to be made by Janiece. Who will she run to when she is ready to love?
Release date: April 26, 2022
Publisher: Urban Books
Print pages: 288
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Who Do I Run To?
Anna Black
So many questions ran through Janiece’s mind while she was sitting in her dimly lit bedroom. Candles were burning, and Joe’s soft sounds, “Worst Case Scenario,” repeatedly played for the fourth or fifth time. She looked over at the clock. The minutes were ticking by fast. Soon, it would be time for him to make his departure. She rubbed his face, gently caressing his chocolate skin. Then she leaned over, kissed his shoulder, and then slid back under the covers to enjoy her final moments of having his warm body in her bed.
She wished he would take a courageous chance and stay past his usual two o’clock departure hour, but not one night in five years did he change his routine. For five years, she has been his “other half.” “The completion of his life,” he would say. She gave him all the things he couldn’t get from Mrs. Paxton. He was the only man she wanted, loved, desired, and adored. But, as much as she wanted to be, she wasn’t the first lady in his life. The truth is, he was married with two kids, but Janiece was his “more than a woman,” he would say.
She was the listener with no back talk or disputes. He told her that her home was a place of peace and relaxation. She had no kids, no pets, and no loudmouthed girlfriends hanging around. Instead, she offered a quiet, peaceful, stress-free environment, with good eating and good loving.
She would only get in his ear when she felt she wasn’t getting enough time. There were times when she got plenty of his attention, and then there were the dry moments when she barely saw him. She tried dating and seeing other men to occupy the lonely times in her life a few times, but that didn’t work because K.P. would get upset. He wouldn’t actually come out and say it, but he would make comments or find a way to ruin the relationship, like coming over when he knew she had company.
One time, she had a date that she brought home with her, and when she got to her condo, K.P. was sitting outside on the steps waiting for her. He didn’t make a scene. He just politely asked her date if he could speak with her for a moment in private, and, of course, her date obliged. They stepped inside her door, and she was waiting for him to say something, but he said nothing. Finally, after a few moments of silence, she asked, “K.P., what is it? I can’t leave him out there too long. Why are you here? You knew I was going on a date.” And he just stood there looking at her like she had been caught doing something wrong.
She could see how bothered he was, and she felt terrible, so she said, “Look, baby, I’ll get rid of him, and I’ll call you when he’s gone,” because K.P. didn’t budge. So she finally brushed by him to tell her date she would call him later, but he was already gone.
When she came back inside, K.P. was standing there looking at her like he had done nothing wrong. After that, she gave up dating completely. She had no interest in other men because she had gotten so deeply involved with K.P. that he was the only one she made herself available for. So she fell into a regular routine of being his “other woman,” and that was how things were.
She thought he was the sexiest man she had ever hooked up with. From day one, she was caught up on him. Even though their time was limited, she had gotten pretty comfortable with him over the years. He was tall, had chocolate skin, and was built like a freight train. She was turned on by his style, the way he dressed, and that beautiful, bright smile he was blessed with. Unfortunately, that was his weapon against her.
When she would be pissed or upset because he’d either stand her up or not answer his phone for days, all he had to do was turn on the charm, but when she pissed him off, he’d be an asshole. The sad thing is, he was only pissed when he was jealous and thought some other man was sniffing around. So she would purposely lie and say she had plans with a guy and instead, be out with her sister so that she could get extra time and attention from him. He’d only put in work when he thought he had competition, so she used that to her advantage.
After a moment of pulling the jealous card, she promised him that she wouldn’t mess with anyone else. He got a key to her place, and he has been her only man for the last three of their five-year relationship. Now he answers her phone, comes and goes as he pleases, and has all the privileges that a married man shouldn’t have her sister Janelle would tell her. Janelle would always shake her head at some of the things Janiece would say about their relationship. Janiece just felt that Janelle didn’t understand or know K.P. like she knew him, but in Janelle’s mind, he was a low-down, dirty bastard, and she couldn’t stand the sight of him.
She told Janiece too many times how she felt about K.P. and the whole situation with him, and Janiece would simply reply, “What’s good for you ain’t good for everybody. When I get tired of the situation, that’s when I get tired, and that’s that.” Janelle would just shake her head in astonishment. She wanted better for her one and only sister, but you can’t tell grown folks anything, so she tried to stop pushing the issue. It never changed anything, and for five years, Janiece has played second to Kimberly Paxton, a woman Janiece didn’t have a positive or negative attitude about.
Janiece sometimes felt that Kimberly was just as bad as she was, being in love with a man she had to know was cheating on her. There were times when he and Janiece would be together, and his wife would call his phone ten times, and he wouldn’t answer. What he told his wife later, Janiece had no clue. There were times when they’d be making love, and he would pick up his phone and tell his wife that he was busy, and he’d call her back. He’d say to her that he’d be home in an hour and didn’t leave Janiece’s condo until three or four hours later sometimes.
That made Janiece feel his wife had to know something. Maybe Kimberly was just like her . . . in love with him and had accepted things for what they were. Janiece loved him just as much as his wife, she assumed, and she continued to love him and be right there for him because that was where she wanted to be, and that night was no different.
Although she dreaded the two a.m. hour, it was approaching quickly. The alarm would be waking him soon to leave her again, and she wasn’t ready for it to sound off.
K.P. was so anal about getting up on time. He also set his alarm on his phone so that he wouldn’t oversleep. She lay back in his arms and snuggled close to him. The clock read 11:29 p.m., and it’s like she blinked, and the alarm was sounding off. Mechanically, he got up. He hit the OFF button on the alarm clock, and then he turned the alarm on his phone off. After that, he stood up and leaned over in the dark, looking for his boxers.
“Jai,” he whispered like he would wake up someone else in the house.
“Yeah?” she responded, annoyed.
“Where are my boxers?” he asked, feeling around and under her as if she hid them.
“Man, I don’t know,” she said and nestled back under the covers.
“Come on, Jai, stop fucking around and help me. You know I gotta go,” he said, feeling around like a madman.
“Look, dude, turn on the lamp and leave me alone,” she snapped. She didn’t have pleasantries to exchange when he had to go. Her attitude was completely different from when he first arrived.
“Fine,” he said and turned on the lamp that sat on the nightstand. “I thought the light would bother you, bighead,” he said and proceeded to look for his shorts. He found them and quickly started to dress.
“No, that loud-ass alarm bothers me. The fact that you can’t give me one night at my place in five years bothers me,” she snapped.
“Jai, baby, come on. Don’t, baby, please. Don’t do this tonight. Don’t trip out on me. You know I don’t like to leave when you’re upset,” he said, putting on his socks. It seemed as if he was in a hurry because he was dressed before she knew it. His shirt was unbuttoned, but he was dressed faster than he had ever dressed before.
“If you hate it so much, why do you leave me by myself all the time? All I asked is for you to just stay past two for one night, K.P.—just one,” she whined.
“Janiece, stop it, baby. No dramatics tonight,” he said and bent over and kissed her forehead. “Now, go back to sleep, and I’ll call you tomorrow. I’ll let you know early if we can get together and maybe rent a movie,” he said.
“I’m tired of renting movies. Chicago is a big city. Why can’t we go out to a movie? You’re not going to get caught,” she said, to him, frustrated because they hardly went out anywhere. Instead, they spent their time indoors, and if they went out, it was to the local bookstore or park near her condo.
“Look,” he said, raising his voice. Then he looked at her face and changed his tone. “Baby, I promise I’ll try to get over here tomorrow, and if you want to go out, I’ll take you out,” he said softly and caressed her face. “Okay, baby? I promise. Now, get some sleep, beautiful, and I’ll work out something special for us tomorrow evening,” he said, laying on the charm. In times like this, she couldn’t stay mad at him.
“You promise?” she asked.
“Yes, you know I will. I love you, babe. Now, come on. Smile for me,” he said, smiling at her. She returned the smile but still didn’t want him to leave.
“I gotta go,” he said, backing away.
“I know, and I love you too,” she told him.
“That’s my girl.” He turned off the lamp and then headed for the door. It didn’t matter if she smiled at him or not. He still had to go. The tears started to flow as soon as she heard the back door shut. Why on earth did she let him have so much power over her? Why couldn’t she just tell him to get the hell on and find a man of her own? She couldn’t figure it out.
She knew she was tired of the “two a.m. got to go home to wife and family” crap. Why did she love someone else’s husband? She didn’t know the answer. Why did she get this deeply involved with K.P.? What she did know was that something had to change for her—and soon.
It was Sunday afternoon, and she hadn’t heard a word from Kerry. Janiece text messaged him five or six times, and she didn’t get any response. She was hungry but didn’t want to eat in case he called and wanted to take her to dinner. She peeped out the kitchen window for the hundredth time, hoping to see his black Escalade in her guest parking stall because he’d sometimes just show up instead of calling.
She wasn’t sure why he would do that from time to time. She just figured that made him feel good to be able to walk in unannounced with his key, guaranteeing she wouldn’t have a guy over. She stared at the clock, and it was still ten after four, and it seemed to be stuck on that time, she thought to herself. She reached for her phone again to text him, but it vibrated in her hand, and she immediately got excited, thinking it was him finally calling or returning her text, but it was her sister, Janelle, instead.
She really didn’t want to talk to her at that time, but she figured she’d kill some time if she chatted with her sister while she waited for Mr. K.P. to call or come by.
“Hello, Janelle,” she said after finally picking up.
“Well, hello, little sis. How are you?” Janelle asked, upbeat. She was always in good spirits. She lived a life that Janiece only dreamed of living. She had a fine-ass husband who made a lot of dough and lived in a huge, six-bedroom home with a gourmet kitchen to die for. She was self-employed and got to work out of her family room. Her husband was a successful banker and worked for one of the largest banks in Chicago.
Janelle went all the way in school. I mean, all the way. She was in school for so long that Janiece thought school was her career choice. When she finally did graduate, and so-called started working, it was from her home, and Janiece, to this day, didn’t get what her job was, although Janelle had broken it down to her five or six times. But Janiece figured it sure was a great-paying career that allowed you to work in your pj’s. So she understood why Janelle was always perky and happy.
“Hey, Nellie, what’s going on?” she asked, trying to sound just as cheery as Janelle was.
“Nothing too much—I was just calling to see what you were up to and to see if you wanted to hang out for a minute. You know, go to the movies, dinner . . . I want to see that new Sanaa Lathan movie that’s out.”
“What—you wanna hang out with me? Where’s Gregory?” she asked sarcastically.
“Greg is out with the fellas at the game, and I finished some work sooner than I thought, and I wanted to get some air. Why do I have to explain why I wanna spend time with you, Janiece?” she asked, sounding a little upset.
“Calm down, Janelle. Damn, I was just joking,” she said quickly. Janelle was older, but she was a big sensitive baby. She would cry at the drop of a hat.
“Oh, okay. So how about it? Are you up for a movie?”
“Girl, I would, but I’m waiting to see if K.P. is gonna call. He was supposed to have something special planned for us tonight,” she said, but she wished she had not.
“Again . . .” Janelle said and clicked her tongue. “Janiece, when are you gonna stop waiting around for this clown? He’s a two-timing loser,” she said, with anger in her voice.
“Come on, Nellie, don’t start. You know how I feel about K.P., and you know we’ve been through this a million times. What I do is my business.”
“Yeah, I know, and you know how I feel about my baby sister fucking someone’s husband,” she said unsympathetically.
Janiece really didn’t want to continue the conversation if they went through the same old sermon about her and Kerry.
“Okay, Janelle, here we go. You wanna reprimand me again, go right ahead. You wanna bash K.P. again, go right ahead. It’s not like you’re gonna say something new,” Janiece said, rolling her eyes. She wished she hadn’t picked up the damn phone and was about a minute from hanging up.
“You are so stubborn and thickheaded, just like your daddy was.”
“Aw, please, Janelle, he was your daddy too, you heifer, and I’ve never disregarded what you’ve said. I just want you to know that I will leave K.P. alone when I’m good and ready. There’s nothing you can say to make me change. I love him, and that’s that, so leave it alone.”
“And if he loved you, you wouldn’t have to sit around waiting to see if he is or if he isn’t gonna call. If he loved or respected his wife, he wouldn’t be fucking around with you. So if you want to continue to wait for that loser, go right ahead; be my guest. I have nothing more to say about it,” she said and blew out a breath of air.
“Good,” Janiece said, relieved and hoping she’d leave it alone. She thought that would be the end of it, but, of course, it wasn’t.
“I just can’t understand for the life of me why a beautiful young woman like you would settle for such crap. You can have any guy you want, but you put up with K.P.’s stank behind. I don’t get that, Jai,” she said, now, sounding like their mother.
“So stop trying to get it, Mrs. Perfect. We all can’t be like you. Do you feel better now that you’ve told me straight?” Janiece asked, irritated.
“Come on, Jai. Don’t, sweetie. I didn’t call you to argue or tell you straight. I just wanted to hang out with you. I want you to be happy, and I just think you deserve way more in a man than being on standby,” she said tenderly.
Janiece knew her sister meant well, but her life was her life. Janiece couldn’t help that she was in love with K.P. She never meant for that to happen, but since it had, she stayed with him. She didn’t have any intentions or schemes to ruin his marriage. She just accepted things for what they were, and she would keep going until she couldn’t go anymore. All the scolding in the world from Janelle went in one ear and out the other.
Her girlfriend Tia didn’t lecture her. Tia stopped badmouthing K.P. two years ago when she realized Janiece would do what Janiece wanted to do, and Janiece wished her sister had taken the same approach to her life choices.
“I know where you’re coming from. I’ve heard you the last 2,000 times you have told me, but please, leave it alone. I wish I could just walk away. I wish I could just stop messing with a married man. I wish I could just turn my feelings for K.P. off, but that is not the case. Shit is just not that simple. Understand that I’m not proud of my relationship with him, Nellie. I’m not walking down the streets broadcasting I’m in love with a married man who is two-timing his wife. I just love him, Nellie, and I’m sad without him. I know you think I sound pathetic and stupid, but that’s how I feel,” she said, speaking honestly to her older sister.
No matter what approach she took with Janelle, there was no common ground with that situation. Janelle wasn’t going to show her sister any type of approval or support for her lifestyle with K.P.—she totally hated that about her sister, and she wasn’t going to change.
“So the answer is no? You don’t wanna go? You wanna wait for Mr. Dawg to call you?”
“No, the answer is not no. Just give me a little while longer to see if he calls, and if he doesn’t, I wanna go, okay? Please, sissy, don’t give me a hard time,” she whined like a little sister would.
“Okay. Fine, you little nutcase. I love you so much, and I just can’t comprehend how we came from the same parents. You are twisted, you little retard,” she said jokingly. But deep down, she thought her baby sister was crazy to be in love with such a loser. “But you better not take forever. Unlike you, I have a life, and I’m hungry, and K.P. is not gonna put my life on hold too.”
“Thanks, Nellie. I’ll call you back soon,” Janiece said, smiling. She loved her sister and knew that if K.P. came up in any conversation, it would be the same argument, and it didn’t make her so angry anymore.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Bye,” she said and hung up before Janiece could say goodbye. Janiece hopped off the couch and ran to the window again, and still, there was no sign of him. So she redialed his phone, and it went straight to voicemail. She didn’t leave another message this time. Then she opened the fridge and fought the urge to fix a sandwich or eat a piece of fruit because she didn’t want to ruin her appetite if he came by or if she went out with her sister.
Janiece went back to the sofa, grabbed the remote, and flipped through the channels. She landed on the Encore channel and decided to watch Love Jones, one of her favorite movies. It had already been on, but she wanted to finish it anyway. Once the film was over, it was 5:44 p.m., so she reached for the cordless and dialed K.P. once more, but again, the voicemail came on.
She walked to the kitchen window while dialing her sister back and looking through the curtains. Her guest parking stall was still empty. When Janelle picked up, she was glad that her sister didn’t wait until seven or eight o’clock for K.P. to call. She was actually surprised that she called back that soon. That was good for Janiece.
“Hey, girl, you’re getting better,” Janelle teased.
“What are you talking about?” Janiece asked in confusion.
“I thought you’d be waiting for the dawg longer than an hour,” she joked.
“Ha-ha, funny—you always got to go there, don’t you?”
“I’m just playing. You wanna go? There’s a movie that starts at 8:40. We can go to dinner and make that one.”
“Yeah, that’s cool. I’ll be ready in about twenty minutes,” Janiece said, looking out the window with a sad look on her face. She was disappointed again that he didn’t call like he said he would.
“Okay, then, I’ll be there shortly.”
“Okay, bye,” Janiece said, and they hung up. Janiece went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and fix her hair. She unwrapped her hair, looked at her roots, and shook her head. Then, quickly, she plugged in her flat iron and started dressing.
She put on her jeans, but not her shirt, because she had to put some heat on her roots, so her hair could look halfway decent. She washed her face, then put on some powder and lip gloss. As soon as she put on her shirt, her sister knocked on the door. She looked at her clock and thought, Damn, she must have done ninety, but then she realized flat ironing her hair took some time.
“You’re dressed,” Janelle teased when she opened the door.
“Yes, I am. Just let me grab my boots and jacket,” Janiece said, walking back into the other room and opening her hall closet. The layout of her condo was nice. It’s just that the hall closet was near the front door, and she never used the front door unless she checked the mail or wanted quiet with a nice breeze. The parking stalls were in the back, so the back door was used for convenience. She grabbed a pair of tan boots and went into her room to put them on.
“Your place is immaculately clean, as usual. I wish I were as creative as you,” Janelle yelled.
“Thank you, and you know I get it from Mom.”
“I know. I wished you were this brilliant when it came to picking men,” she added.
Janiece rolled her eyes and went back to the living room to say something about her sister’s last remark, but she paused and took another look at her sister, thinking how good she looked with her casual clothing, fresh curly hairdo, and French-manicured nails. Her diamond wedding ring sparkled underneath the dim light, and as usual, she had on name-brand boots, a matching handbag, and a nice camel-colored leather jacket. Her makeup, not the cheap stuff Janiece used, looked like a professional did it, Janiece thought as she checked out her sister.
“Hey, are you ready?” Janiece asked with purse and jacket in hand. She was ready, but after taking a good look at Janelle, she wished she had chosen a different outfit.
“Yeah, I’m starving, girl,” she said and started to walk toward the door.
“Girl, me too,” Janiece said, walking a step behind her. As they made their way to the door, Janiece heard keys on the other side. Someone was coming in. It was the one and only K.P., and they both paused when he entered. When he opened the door, he stood there for an awkward moment before she said anything. He was dressed nicely and had flowers in his hand.
“Hey, baby, we were on our way out for dinner,” Janiece said, breaking the silence.
“These are for you,” he said, handing her the flowers. “How are you, Janelle?” he asked.
Janelle gave him a weak smile and merely replied that she was good. She didn’t bother to ask him how he was doing, but he disclosed the unwanted information to her anyway.
“I’m doing well myself,” he said, volunteering conversation. Even though he wasn’t one of her favorites, that never stopped him from trying to be friendly. “Look, I can see that I came at a bad time. I was just trying to surprise you,” he said to Janiece. He looked at her like he wanted her to forget about her plans with Janelle and allow him to do what he came to do.
“I know, baby, and I am happy that you came, and the flowers are beautiful,” she said, admiring them. Janelle sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes. She didn’t bother to hide how irritated she was around K.P., but Janiece didn’t pay her any mind.
“Look, baby, you can come with us. We all can go to dinner,” she said like that was an excellent idea, and Janelle looked at her like she was insane.
“Look, I’ll be downstairs,” Janelle interrupted and opened the door. “And hurry up, Jai, because I’m hungry,” she barked and shut the door behind her after giving K.P. another evil look.
“Look, K.P., I’m sorry about her,” Jai said, apologizing for her sister’s behavior.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize for her. I know and understand why she hates me. I told you in the beginning not to tell her that I was married, Jai.”
“I had to tell her. I can’t lie to my family. Not to my big sister. It’s bad enough . . .
She wished he would take a courageous chance and stay past his usual two o’clock departure hour, but not one night in five years did he change his routine. For five years, she has been his “other half.” “The completion of his life,” he would say. She gave him all the things he couldn’t get from Mrs. Paxton. He was the only man she wanted, loved, desired, and adored. But, as much as she wanted to be, she wasn’t the first lady in his life. The truth is, he was married with two kids, but Janiece was his “more than a woman,” he would say.
She was the listener with no back talk or disputes. He told her that her home was a place of peace and relaxation. She had no kids, no pets, and no loudmouthed girlfriends hanging around. Instead, she offered a quiet, peaceful, stress-free environment, with good eating and good loving.
She would only get in his ear when she felt she wasn’t getting enough time. There were times when she got plenty of his attention, and then there were the dry moments when she barely saw him. She tried dating and seeing other men to occupy the lonely times in her life a few times, but that didn’t work because K.P. would get upset. He wouldn’t actually come out and say it, but he would make comments or find a way to ruin the relationship, like coming over when he knew she had company.
One time, she had a date that she brought home with her, and when she got to her condo, K.P. was sitting outside on the steps waiting for her. He didn’t make a scene. He just politely asked her date if he could speak with her for a moment in private, and, of course, her date obliged. They stepped inside her door, and she was waiting for him to say something, but he said nothing. Finally, after a few moments of silence, she asked, “K.P., what is it? I can’t leave him out there too long. Why are you here? You knew I was going on a date.” And he just stood there looking at her like she had been caught doing something wrong.
She could see how bothered he was, and she felt terrible, so she said, “Look, baby, I’ll get rid of him, and I’ll call you when he’s gone,” because K.P. didn’t budge. So she finally brushed by him to tell her date she would call him later, but he was already gone.
When she came back inside, K.P. was standing there looking at her like he had done nothing wrong. After that, she gave up dating completely. She had no interest in other men because she had gotten so deeply involved with K.P. that he was the only one she made herself available for. So she fell into a regular routine of being his “other woman,” and that was how things were.
She thought he was the sexiest man she had ever hooked up with. From day one, she was caught up on him. Even though their time was limited, she had gotten pretty comfortable with him over the years. He was tall, had chocolate skin, and was built like a freight train. She was turned on by his style, the way he dressed, and that beautiful, bright smile he was blessed with. Unfortunately, that was his weapon against her.
When she would be pissed or upset because he’d either stand her up or not answer his phone for days, all he had to do was turn on the charm, but when she pissed him off, he’d be an asshole. The sad thing is, he was only pissed when he was jealous and thought some other man was sniffing around. So she would purposely lie and say she had plans with a guy and instead, be out with her sister so that she could get extra time and attention from him. He’d only put in work when he thought he had competition, so she used that to her advantage.
After a moment of pulling the jealous card, she promised him that she wouldn’t mess with anyone else. He got a key to her place, and he has been her only man for the last three of their five-year relationship. Now he answers her phone, comes and goes as he pleases, and has all the privileges that a married man shouldn’t have her sister Janelle would tell her. Janelle would always shake her head at some of the things Janiece would say about their relationship. Janiece just felt that Janelle didn’t understand or know K.P. like she knew him, but in Janelle’s mind, he was a low-down, dirty bastard, and she couldn’t stand the sight of him.
She told Janiece too many times how she felt about K.P. and the whole situation with him, and Janiece would simply reply, “What’s good for you ain’t good for everybody. When I get tired of the situation, that’s when I get tired, and that’s that.” Janelle would just shake her head in astonishment. She wanted better for her one and only sister, but you can’t tell grown folks anything, so she tried to stop pushing the issue. It never changed anything, and for five years, Janiece has played second to Kimberly Paxton, a woman Janiece didn’t have a positive or negative attitude about.
Janiece sometimes felt that Kimberly was just as bad as she was, being in love with a man she had to know was cheating on her. There were times when he and Janiece would be together, and his wife would call his phone ten times, and he wouldn’t answer. What he told his wife later, Janiece had no clue. There were times when they’d be making love, and he would pick up his phone and tell his wife that he was busy, and he’d call her back. He’d say to her that he’d be home in an hour and didn’t leave Janiece’s condo until three or four hours later sometimes.
That made Janiece feel his wife had to know something. Maybe Kimberly was just like her . . . in love with him and had accepted things for what they were. Janiece loved him just as much as his wife, she assumed, and she continued to love him and be right there for him because that was where she wanted to be, and that night was no different.
Although she dreaded the two a.m. hour, it was approaching quickly. The alarm would be waking him soon to leave her again, and she wasn’t ready for it to sound off.
K.P. was so anal about getting up on time. He also set his alarm on his phone so that he wouldn’t oversleep. She lay back in his arms and snuggled close to him. The clock read 11:29 p.m., and it’s like she blinked, and the alarm was sounding off. Mechanically, he got up. He hit the OFF button on the alarm clock, and then he turned the alarm on his phone off. After that, he stood up and leaned over in the dark, looking for his boxers.
“Jai,” he whispered like he would wake up someone else in the house.
“Yeah?” she responded, annoyed.
“Where are my boxers?” he asked, feeling around and under her as if she hid them.
“Man, I don’t know,” she said and nestled back under the covers.
“Come on, Jai, stop fucking around and help me. You know I gotta go,” he said, feeling around like a madman.
“Look, dude, turn on the lamp and leave me alone,” she snapped. She didn’t have pleasantries to exchange when he had to go. Her attitude was completely different from when he first arrived.
“Fine,” he said and turned on the lamp that sat on the nightstand. “I thought the light would bother you, bighead,” he said and proceeded to look for his shorts. He found them and quickly started to dress.
“No, that loud-ass alarm bothers me. The fact that you can’t give me one night at my place in five years bothers me,” she snapped.
“Jai, baby, come on. Don’t, baby, please. Don’t do this tonight. Don’t trip out on me. You know I don’t like to leave when you’re upset,” he said, putting on his socks. It seemed as if he was in a hurry because he was dressed before she knew it. His shirt was unbuttoned, but he was dressed faster than he had ever dressed before.
“If you hate it so much, why do you leave me by myself all the time? All I asked is for you to just stay past two for one night, K.P.—just one,” she whined.
“Janiece, stop it, baby. No dramatics tonight,” he said and bent over and kissed her forehead. “Now, go back to sleep, and I’ll call you tomorrow. I’ll let you know early if we can get together and maybe rent a movie,” he said.
“I’m tired of renting movies. Chicago is a big city. Why can’t we go out to a movie? You’re not going to get caught,” she said, to him, frustrated because they hardly went out anywhere. Instead, they spent their time indoors, and if they went out, it was to the local bookstore or park near her condo.
“Look,” he said, raising his voice. Then he looked at her face and changed his tone. “Baby, I promise I’ll try to get over here tomorrow, and if you want to go out, I’ll take you out,” he said softly and caressed her face. “Okay, baby? I promise. Now, get some sleep, beautiful, and I’ll work out something special for us tomorrow evening,” he said, laying on the charm. In times like this, she couldn’t stay mad at him.
“You promise?” she asked.
“Yes, you know I will. I love you, babe. Now, come on. Smile for me,” he said, smiling at her. She returned the smile but still didn’t want him to leave.
“I gotta go,” he said, backing away.
“I know, and I love you too,” she told him.
“That’s my girl.” He turned off the lamp and then headed for the door. It didn’t matter if she smiled at him or not. He still had to go. The tears started to flow as soon as she heard the back door shut. Why on earth did she let him have so much power over her? Why couldn’t she just tell him to get the hell on and find a man of her own? She couldn’t figure it out.
She knew she was tired of the “two a.m. got to go home to wife and family” crap. Why did she love someone else’s husband? She didn’t know the answer. Why did she get this deeply involved with K.P.? What she did know was that something had to change for her—and soon.
It was Sunday afternoon, and she hadn’t heard a word from Kerry. Janiece text messaged him five or six times, and she didn’t get any response. She was hungry but didn’t want to eat in case he called and wanted to take her to dinner. She peeped out the kitchen window for the hundredth time, hoping to see his black Escalade in her guest parking stall because he’d sometimes just show up instead of calling.
She wasn’t sure why he would do that from time to time. She just figured that made him feel good to be able to walk in unannounced with his key, guaranteeing she wouldn’t have a guy over. She stared at the clock, and it was still ten after four, and it seemed to be stuck on that time, she thought to herself. She reached for her phone again to text him, but it vibrated in her hand, and she immediately got excited, thinking it was him finally calling or returning her text, but it was her sister, Janelle, instead.
She really didn’t want to talk to her at that time, but she figured she’d kill some time if she chatted with her sister while she waited for Mr. K.P. to call or come by.
“Hello, Janelle,” she said after finally picking up.
“Well, hello, little sis. How are you?” Janelle asked, upbeat. She was always in good spirits. She lived a life that Janiece only dreamed of living. She had a fine-ass husband who made a lot of dough and lived in a huge, six-bedroom home with a gourmet kitchen to die for. She was self-employed and got to work out of her family room. Her husband was a successful banker and worked for one of the largest banks in Chicago.
Janelle went all the way in school. I mean, all the way. She was in school for so long that Janiece thought school was her career choice. When she finally did graduate, and so-called started working, it was from her home, and Janiece, to this day, didn’t get what her job was, although Janelle had broken it down to her five or six times. But Janiece figured it sure was a great-paying career that allowed you to work in your pj’s. So she understood why Janelle was always perky and happy.
“Hey, Nellie, what’s going on?” she asked, trying to sound just as cheery as Janelle was.
“Nothing too much—I was just calling to see what you were up to and to see if you wanted to hang out for a minute. You know, go to the movies, dinner . . . I want to see that new Sanaa Lathan movie that’s out.”
“What—you wanna hang out with me? Where’s Gregory?” she asked sarcastically.
“Greg is out with the fellas at the game, and I finished some work sooner than I thought, and I wanted to get some air. Why do I have to explain why I wanna spend time with you, Janiece?” she asked, sounding a little upset.
“Calm down, Janelle. Damn, I was just joking,” she said quickly. Janelle was older, but she was a big sensitive baby. She would cry at the drop of a hat.
“Oh, okay. So how about it? Are you up for a movie?”
“Girl, I would, but I’m waiting to see if K.P. is gonna call. He was supposed to have something special planned for us tonight,” she said, but she wished she had not.
“Again . . .” Janelle said and clicked her tongue. “Janiece, when are you gonna stop waiting around for this clown? He’s a two-timing loser,” she said, with anger in her voice.
“Come on, Nellie, don’t start. You know how I feel about K.P., and you know we’ve been through this a million times. What I do is my business.”
“Yeah, I know, and you know how I feel about my baby sister fucking someone’s husband,” she said unsympathetically.
Janiece really didn’t want to continue the conversation if they went through the same old sermon about her and Kerry.
“Okay, Janelle, here we go. You wanna reprimand me again, go right ahead. You wanna bash K.P. again, go right ahead. It’s not like you’re gonna say something new,” Janiece said, rolling her eyes. She wished she hadn’t picked up the damn phone and was about a minute from hanging up.
“You are so stubborn and thickheaded, just like your daddy was.”
“Aw, please, Janelle, he was your daddy too, you heifer, and I’ve never disregarded what you’ve said. I just want you to know that I will leave K.P. alone when I’m good and ready. There’s nothing you can say to make me change. I love him, and that’s that, so leave it alone.”
“And if he loved you, you wouldn’t have to sit around waiting to see if he is or if he isn’t gonna call. If he loved or respected his wife, he wouldn’t be fucking around with you. So if you want to continue to wait for that loser, go right ahead; be my guest. I have nothing more to say about it,” she said and blew out a breath of air.
“Good,” Janiece said, relieved and hoping she’d leave it alone. She thought that would be the end of it, but, of course, it wasn’t.
“I just can’t understand for the life of me why a beautiful young woman like you would settle for such crap. You can have any guy you want, but you put up with K.P.’s stank behind. I don’t get that, Jai,” she said, now, sounding like their mother.
“So stop trying to get it, Mrs. Perfect. We all can’t be like you. Do you feel better now that you’ve told me straight?” Janiece asked, irritated.
“Come on, Jai. Don’t, sweetie. I didn’t call you to argue or tell you straight. I just wanted to hang out with you. I want you to be happy, and I just think you deserve way more in a man than being on standby,” she said tenderly.
Janiece knew her sister meant well, but her life was her life. Janiece couldn’t help that she was in love with K.P. She never meant for that to happen, but since it had, she stayed with him. She didn’t have any intentions or schemes to ruin his marriage. She just accepted things for what they were, and she would keep going until she couldn’t go anymore. All the scolding in the world from Janelle went in one ear and out the other.
Her girlfriend Tia didn’t lecture her. Tia stopped badmouthing K.P. two years ago when she realized Janiece would do what Janiece wanted to do, and Janiece wished her sister had taken the same approach to her life choices.
“I know where you’re coming from. I’ve heard you the last 2,000 times you have told me, but please, leave it alone. I wish I could just walk away. I wish I could just stop messing with a married man. I wish I could just turn my feelings for K.P. off, but that is not the case. Shit is just not that simple. Understand that I’m not proud of my relationship with him, Nellie. I’m not walking down the streets broadcasting I’m in love with a married man who is two-timing his wife. I just love him, Nellie, and I’m sad without him. I know you think I sound pathetic and stupid, but that’s how I feel,” she said, speaking honestly to her older sister.
No matter what approach she took with Janelle, there was no common ground with that situation. Janelle wasn’t going to show her sister any type of approval or support for her lifestyle with K.P.—she totally hated that about her sister, and she wasn’t going to change.
“So the answer is no? You don’t wanna go? You wanna wait for Mr. Dawg to call you?”
“No, the answer is not no. Just give me a little while longer to see if he calls, and if he doesn’t, I wanna go, okay? Please, sissy, don’t give me a hard time,” she whined like a little sister would.
“Okay. Fine, you little nutcase. I love you so much, and I just can’t comprehend how we came from the same parents. You are twisted, you little retard,” she said jokingly. But deep down, she thought her baby sister was crazy to be in love with such a loser. “But you better not take forever. Unlike you, I have a life, and I’m hungry, and K.P. is not gonna put my life on hold too.”
“Thanks, Nellie. I’ll call you back soon,” Janiece said, smiling. She loved her sister and knew that if K.P. came up in any conversation, it would be the same argument, and it didn’t make her so angry anymore.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Bye,” she said and hung up before Janiece could say goodbye. Janiece hopped off the couch and ran to the window again, and still, there was no sign of him. So she redialed his phone, and it went straight to voicemail. She didn’t leave another message this time. Then she opened the fridge and fought the urge to fix a sandwich or eat a piece of fruit because she didn’t want to ruin her appetite if he came by or if she went out with her sister.
Janiece went back to the sofa, grabbed the remote, and flipped through the channels. She landed on the Encore channel and decided to watch Love Jones, one of her favorite movies. It had already been on, but she wanted to finish it anyway. Once the film was over, it was 5:44 p.m., so she reached for the cordless and dialed K.P. once more, but again, the voicemail came on.
She walked to the kitchen window while dialing her sister back and looking through the curtains. Her guest parking stall was still empty. When Janelle picked up, she was glad that her sister didn’t wait until seven or eight o’clock for K.P. to call. She was actually surprised that she called back that soon. That was good for Janiece.
“Hey, girl, you’re getting better,” Janelle teased.
“What are you talking about?” Janiece asked in confusion.
“I thought you’d be waiting for the dawg longer than an hour,” she joked.
“Ha-ha, funny—you always got to go there, don’t you?”
“I’m just playing. You wanna go? There’s a movie that starts at 8:40. We can go to dinner and make that one.”
“Yeah, that’s cool. I’ll be ready in about twenty minutes,” Janiece said, looking out the window with a sad look on her face. She was disappointed again that he didn’t call like he said he would.
“Okay, then, I’ll be there shortly.”
“Okay, bye,” Janiece said, and they hung up. Janiece went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and fix her hair. She unwrapped her hair, looked at her roots, and shook her head. Then, quickly, she plugged in her flat iron and started dressing.
She put on her jeans, but not her shirt, because she had to put some heat on her roots, so her hair could look halfway decent. She washed her face, then put on some powder and lip gloss. As soon as she put on her shirt, her sister knocked on the door. She looked at her clock and thought, Damn, she must have done ninety, but then she realized flat ironing her hair took some time.
“You’re dressed,” Janelle teased when she opened the door.
“Yes, I am. Just let me grab my boots and jacket,” Janiece said, walking back into the other room and opening her hall closet. The layout of her condo was nice. It’s just that the hall closet was near the front door, and she never used the front door unless she checked the mail or wanted quiet with a nice breeze. The parking stalls were in the back, so the back door was used for convenience. She grabbed a pair of tan boots and went into her room to put them on.
“Your place is immaculately clean, as usual. I wish I were as creative as you,” Janelle yelled.
“Thank you, and you know I get it from Mom.”
“I know. I wished you were this brilliant when it came to picking men,” she added.
Janiece rolled her eyes and went back to the living room to say something about her sister’s last remark, but she paused and took another look at her sister, thinking how good she looked with her casual clothing, fresh curly hairdo, and French-manicured nails. Her diamond wedding ring sparkled underneath the dim light, and as usual, she had on name-brand boots, a matching handbag, and a nice camel-colored leather jacket. Her makeup, not the cheap stuff Janiece used, looked like a professional did it, Janiece thought as she checked out her sister.
“Hey, are you ready?” Janiece asked with purse and jacket in hand. She was ready, but after taking a good look at Janelle, she wished she had chosen a different outfit.
“Yeah, I’m starving, girl,” she said and started to walk toward the door.
“Girl, me too,” Janiece said, walking a step behind her. As they made their way to the door, Janiece heard keys on the other side. Someone was coming in. It was the one and only K.P., and they both paused when he entered. When he opened the door, he stood there for an awkward moment before she said anything. He was dressed nicely and had flowers in his hand.
“Hey, baby, we were on our way out for dinner,” Janiece said, breaking the silence.
“These are for you,” he said, handing her the flowers. “How are you, Janelle?” he asked.
Janelle gave him a weak smile and merely replied that she was good. She didn’t bother to ask him how he was doing, but he disclosed the unwanted information to her anyway.
“I’m doing well myself,” he said, volunteering conversation. Even though he wasn’t one of her favorites, that never stopped him from trying to be friendly. “Look, I can see that I came at a bad time. I was just trying to surprise you,” he said to Janiece. He looked at her like he wanted her to forget about her plans with Janelle and allow him to do what he came to do.
“I know, baby, and I am happy that you came, and the flowers are beautiful,” she said, admiring them. Janelle sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes. She didn’t bother to hide how irritated she was around K.P., but Janiece didn’t pay her any mind.
“Look, baby, you can come with us. We all can go to dinner,” she said like that was an excellent idea, and Janelle looked at her like she was insane.
“Look, I’ll be downstairs,” Janelle interrupted and opened the door. “And hurry up, Jai, because I’m hungry,” she barked and shut the door behind her after giving K.P. another evil look.
“Look, K.P., I’m sorry about her,” Jai said, apologizing for her sister’s behavior.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize for her. I know and understand why she hates me. I told you in the beginning not to tell her that I was married, Jai.”
“I had to tell her. I can’t lie to my family. Not to my big sister. It’s bad enough . . .
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