Chapter One
Vince
Normally, I don’t watch the clock. Especially in this class since it’s my favorite. But today I’m restless. Each minute feels like an hour as I watch the hands slowly move. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that time is standing still.
Will it ever end?
My mind drifts to thoughts I can’t afford to think about, and a dull ache in the center of my head forms.
Immediately, I tamp those thoughts down.
This isn’t the time or the place.
Today of all days, I deserve to be happy.
I’ve made a promise to Van, and I fully intend to honor it.
Switching gears, I focus on counting my blessings. I have so many things to be thankful for. Today’s not the day to wallow or self-destruct, no matter how much I miss them.
Having no idea how long I’ve zoned out, somehow through my fog-like state I hear my favorite professor finally announce the words I’ve been waiting for, “I’ll see you Monday.”
With my trance lifted, I quickly gather my things, stuffing them into my backpack. Ignoring the classmates I usually talk with at the end of class, I take the stairs two at a time, eager to get some fresh air and shake away my thoughts.
With each step I take, my chest loosens, and my thoughts easily become about the here and now, rather than the past. They aren’t bad memories per se, but the past has a way of pulling me into a rabbit hole I’m not prepared to enter today.
By the time I reach the center of campus, I feel more in control of my thoughts. Hearing my name shouted from behind me makes me stop and turn around.
I can’t help but smile at Ryan’s goofy grin as he towers above the crowded courtyard. I’m just over six feet, and the man has a half of a head over me in height. “Wait up, man. What’s the rush?”
Ryan and I met as freshman. He may not know it, but he’s helped me through more than he’ll ever know. My body instantly falls into a relaxed stance, and the tension from before nearly disappears. “Not much,” I say, running my palm along my neck to relieve what’s left of the tension built there. “I thought I wouldn’t see you until later tonight?”
“Class got out early, and I’m on my way home. Is Vanessa coming out with us?”
“Nah…” I say, shaking my head. “Couldn’t find a sitter. She’ll go out tomorrow night.”
Wait… is that disappointment I see in his eyes? Before I can think twice about it, Ryan’s expression returns to carefree. “So… it’ll just be us guys tonight?”
Weird. I must’ve imagined it.
“Looks like it. I’ll text you later when I’m ready. I’m doing dinner with the fam, then we’ll meet up.”
“Sure thing, man. I’ll pick you up since I’m DD. There’s no way I’m walkin’ home tonight.”
Before I can respond, my phone buzzes in my pocket. Knowing it could only be a handful of people at this time, I immediately pull it out to find a text notification.
Van: We’re slammed at work and short staffed. Can you pick up J? I won’t make it there in time.
I notice the time. Shit. I have twenty minutes and of course, I chose to walk to campus today.
I don’t even hesitate as my fingers fly across the keys to respond.
Me: Of course. I’ll see you when you get home.
Van: I’ll make it up to you by bringing home dinner.
Me: You won’t hear me complaining.
Van: Haha—like you’d ever complain about not cooking. See you at home. Thanks again.
Looking up to Ryan, I explain, “Sorry, man, gotta pick up Jules. I’ll let you know when I’m ready. Thanks again for driving my ass around. I promise not to get too out of control,” I tack on just to put a smile on his face.
This earns me a dramatic eye roll. “No one deserves this more than you. I’m happy to help out.” He knows I won’t drink much. And he knows why I’d never take the chance behind the wheel. Yet he won’t let today pass as just another day either. That’s what good friends are for.
With that, I turn and lengthen my strides across campus. It figures with this being farthest class from Jules, today would be a day Van can’t pick her up. At this time of day, it’s difficult to be on time without making any stops. But there’s nothing I won’t do for her—or Vanessa for that matter.
In fact, I’ve done everything I can to make sure their needs come first. Refusing to let them be another statistic based on the stack we’ve been dealt. Hell, don’t get me wrong, I’ve learned to love Columbia River University, but it wasn’t my first choice. No—I’m here because it was Vanessa’s first choice. Me attending CRU is the only way she’d be able to reach her dreams, too.
Don’t get me wrong—I’m by no means a martyr. I’m getting a great education, but my plans to go away on my own to school went up in smoke right after graduation. Thank goodness, I’d already been accepted to CRU, and my counselor pulled some strings when he explained our situation. CRU’s become home to us, and I think it was the best decision I’ve ever made. Life’s way too damn short to live with regrets.
It helps that I love it here.
Walking across campus, I’m reminded of exactly why. Where else can you see St. Helens, Mt. Adams, and Mt. Hood from one location? Not to mention the Columbia River in the far distance, from this particular spot. It’s just one of the many perks of living in the Pacific Northwest. I couldn’t have picked a better place if I’d tried. This was the perfect decision for our family, and the people we’ve met along the way have welcomed us like family of their own.
I arrive with minutes to spare. Walking into the daycare center, I’m greeted by Shannon, the girl who usually runs the pick-up station at this time of day.
“Hey, Vince. Julia will be out any minute. I saw you walking up and already told her to gather her things.”
“Thanks, Shannon. Vanessa had to work late.”
We’re interrupted by the sound of feet tapping against the tiled floor. I turn to see Julia’s bright smile as she closes the distance between us, practically running. God knows a three-year-old can’t walk inside, no matter how many times we remind her. Especially when she’s excited.
“I thought Momma was pickin’ me up?” she says as I bend, pulling her into a hug. She eagerly embraces me tight. She smells of fun and innocence. This hug is like a breath of fresh air, after being trapped with my thoughts all afternoon.
“Nope.” I pop the p purposely, making her giggle. “You get me tonight, squirt.” Standing to my full height, I bring her with me as she clings to my neck like the monkey she is.
“Can we make a cake when we get home? Momma said we’d make cake.” Her serious tone is just like her mom’s when she wants something. Clearly, the apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree.
This girl has a one-track mind. “Who do you think you’re dealing with? Of course, we’ll make a cake. But I get to lick one of the beaters.” I bop her on the nose with a grin. “You know the rules.”
This earns me an exasperated sigh, just like I’d get from Van if she were here and an intense eye roll from a pair of eyes that mirror my own. “You’re silly. I share with you. Always… Or next time, I don’t get any.”
Yep. She’s got the rules down pat. I set her on her feet and pat her head playfully before instinctively reaching for her hand. “You ready to get out of here and let Miss Shannon get on with her night?”
“Night, Miss Shannon.” Julia beams. “See you tomorrow. We’re makin’ a cake.”
Shannon chuckles lightly as she waves. “Have fun, you two. Don’t get into too much trouble.”
As sweet as can be, Julia smiles wide. “Don’t worry. Unks is trouble. Not me.”
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