The Second Marriage

by Jess Ryder

Genres: Mystery; Thrillers; Psychological Thrillers; Suspense

Synopsis

‘They’re lying,’ my little stepson whispers, his blue eyes shining with tears as I tuck him into bed for the first time. ‘They think I’ve forgotten, but I remember everything. I know my mummy is still alive.’

My best friend warned me that it was too soon to marry Edward, a widower with an adorable but troubled little boy. She said we were moving too fast. But all I could see was a kind, loving man, struggling with grief, who needed my help.

Yet as storm clouds gather above our small wedding ceremony, my hopes and dreams fall apart. None of my husband’s family turn up to support us. Instead of a honeymoon, we have a quiet night in. My wedding bouquet is placed on his first wife’s grave. And then my new stepson tells me he’s sure his mother is still alive.

What does Noah remember and why is his father trying to make him forget? Have I been completely wrong about my husband? What happened to the woman who came before me, and how far will he go to stop me finding out the truth?

An utterly unputdownable, gripping, twisty psychological thriller, perfect for fans of Before I Go To Sleep, The Girl on the Train and Gone Girl.

What everyone is saying about Jess Ryder:

‘Set aside everything that you have to do… This book will grip you from the very first pages and hold you tightly in its grasp right until the very last page... it will have you staring into space and wondering what book you could possibly read next because no book would be able to top the one you have just finished. I loved it.’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Wow, wow, wow!!!!! This book had me hook line sinker from the very start… Fast paced and had so many twists and turns… That ending is going to take me a while to get over.’ Blue Moon Blogger, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘I seriously could NOT put this book down! It had me hooked from the beginning to the end… my mind was blown… kept me guessing until the very end. Add this book to your reading list, you won’t be disappointed!’ Red Head That Reads, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Wow this is a stonker of a book. Gripped me from the very first page and even made my bath water go cold in a desperate attempt to finish it… fantastic… takes hold and doesn’t let go. This is going in my top reads!’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘Wow!! This is a gripping book that had me reading until the wee hours. From the first chapter I was pulled into the story and didn’t want to put it down… One of the best psychological suspense stories I have read.’ Goodreads reviewer, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

‘A whopping 5* from me… had me up to early hours of the morning, so transfixed was I to this story that I heard the birds tweeting outside. The ending had me gasping in awe. Truly a masterpiece.’ Sue and her Books, ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Release date: November 3, 2021

Publisher: Bookouture

Print pages: 350

Sample

‘Lily, will you marry me?’

He was down on one knee, holding out a tiny black box, the lid hinged open. A beautiful diamond ring was wedged into a white satin cushion. I let out a gasp and put my hand to my chest. Edward looked up at me, smiling. The corners of his mouth and eyes were etched with fine laughter lines. His grey hair shone in the candlelight like polished steel.

‘Well?’

The other diners had put down their forks and were watching us openly, nodding and smiling like we were part of the evening’s entertainment.

I hadn’t seen the proposal coming, even though he’d told me to dress up for the evening and brought me to one of the most expensive restaurants in Soho. Not even the bottle of vintage champagne had given the game away. I wasn’t used to love moving so fast. My previous boyfriend had taken seven years to decide I wasn’t the one for him, but Edward had made up his mind after as many months.

‘Please say something,’ he said. ‘This is getting embarrassing.’

‘Yes, yes, of course I’ll marry you.’

His eyes lit up and his shoulders dropped. The whole restaurant burst into applause.

‘I didn’t realise we had an audience,’ he said, blushing.

‘They’re just happy for us.’ The ring was a large solitaire, simple and elegant, exactly what I would have chosen myself. ‘It’s stunning,’ I said. ‘Must have cost a fortune.’

‘Never you mind about that. Put it on.’

‘What, now?’

‘Of course now.’ He slipped it onto my finger and it came to rest perfectly. I splayed out my hand and let the diamond catch the candlelight.

‘I can’t believe it. I never dreamt I’d have a ring like this. My mum is going to go crazy when she sees it. And as for my friends…’

‘I can’t wait for you to be my wife,’ he grinned. ‘Let’s get married as soon as we can.’ He sat back down, then leant across the table and kissed me full on the mouth.

‘Hey, steady.’

‘Oh.’ He pulled back, looking hurt. ‘I’m sorry. Am I embarrassing you? It’s because I look old enough to be your father, isn’t it?’

‘You are old enough to be my father,’ I teased.

‘Barely. There’s only fifteen years between us. It’s the grey hair.’ He smoothed it back self-consciously. ‘Makes me look ancient.’

‘No, it makes you look sexy and distinguished. Anyway, you know I couldn’t care less about that. It’s just that everyone’s staring.’

He glanced around. ‘Yes, you’re right. Sorry. I wasn’t thinking.’

‘Shh, no need to apologise. It’s fine.’ I lifted my glass. ‘I love you, Mr Morgan.’

Our eyes locked as we chinked. ‘I fell in love with you at first sight,’ he said. ‘From when you came for the interview. I was trying so hard to be professional. There were all these questions I was supposed to ask you, but they went straight out of my head.’

I laughed. ‘I have to say, it was the easiest interview of my life.’

‘I was so frightened you’d turn me down.’

‘No way. I needed the job.’

‘No, tonight, I mean. You’ve made a forty-five-year-old man very happy, Lily, I can’t tell you.’ He picked up his napkin and wiped his forehead. ‘Sorry, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed.’

‘It’s okay, Edward, everything’s going to be fine.’

He excused himself and went to the bathroom. I sat there turning my hand this way and that to admire the diamond, remembering how it had all started. To think that I’d nearly not bothered to turn up for the interview…

The uphill walk from the Tube station had taken longer than I’d expected; I’d got lost in the maze of twisting side roads, hitting dead ends and having to retrace my steps. Even when I found what had to be the correct house, there was no number or name outside to confirm it either way. I felt irritated. This was taking privacy too far, I thought as I pushed the buzzer on the security gate.

A warm male voice answered and asked for my name. ‘Lily Baxendale,’ I said. ‘I’m here about the teaching job.’ There was a buzzing sound and then the gate swung open. I walked across the expansive paved driveway and up the steps to where my potential employer stood at the open door.

‘Lily! Great to meet you. Sorry about all the security.’ He beckoned me inside. ‘Sadly, we have to be careful these days.’

He was older than I’d expected for someone with an eight-year-old son; casually dressed for the occasion in jeans, a white linen shirt and leather flip-flops on his bare feet. I remember thinking he was very attractive for a man of his age. I guessed he was in his mid forties, although I wasn’t sure. Maybe a few years younger? My stomach flipped over, but I put it down to the butterflies that had been plaguing me since breakfast.

He showed me into the living room and sat me down on a large, squashy sofa. I waited, assuming that his wife would join us, but then it became clear that there would be just the two of us. After I’d refused tea and coffee, he took the chair opposite and we talked. I had all my answers prepared – why I’d quit my career as a primary school teacher, what my approach to home-schooling would be, how I’d balance academic studies with field trips, group activities and physical education – but he didn’t ask me any of the normal questions. Instead, he wanted to know what books I’d read and films I’d seen, what countries I’d visited, what food I enjoyed, whether I liked to cook.

‘I’ve brought my certificates,’ I said, reaching into my bag.

He waved them aside. ‘I’m sure the recruiters did all the necessary checks. I’m more interested in your personality, to be honest. I’m a financial adviser and I work mainly from home, so we’ll be seeing a lot of each other.’

‘Yes, I understand.’

‘The last tutor was very experienced but too strict. Like Mary Poppins but without the magic.’ I laughed appropriately. ‘We didn’t see eye to eye about the best way to handle Noah.’

‘Oh… Yes, well… I can see how important it is that everyone gets on,’ I agreed.

‘Just one thing I should make clear. I only have one rule in this house. And that’s that nobody ever talks to Noah about his mother.’

‘Oh,’ I said, rather taken aback. ‘Can I ask why?’

He paused to swallow, as if it hurt to get the words out. ‘She died when he was only three years old. He has no real memories of her, and that really upsets him. Any mention of her, or even talking about mothers in general, can trigger a serious panic attack. That’s why he can’t go to school – he’d be bullied without a doubt. So please avoid the subject at all times. Is that okay?’

‘Yes, of course,’ I replied, privately thinking it was a strange way to deal with a child’s grief, or anyone’s grief for that matter. But my curiosity was piqued. I immediately wanted to know more about this mysterious woman who couldn’t be mentioned. Had she been the same age as Edward, or a young trophy wife? And how had she died?

‘Noah is a special child,’ he continued, ‘and he needs sensitive handling. We live very quietly here. He spends a lot of time in his bedroom playing video games, and he loves drawing.’

‘Does he do any sport?’

‘He used to have swimming lessons, but it, er… didn’t work out. There’s a basketball hoop and a trampoline in the garden. He likes playing on those. But team sports aren’t really his thing. He’s a solitary child, prefers his own company.’

It sounded like he didn’t have much choice. ‘How do you feel about trips out?’ I ventured. ‘Educational visits, I mean. To museums, art galleries…’

‘That’s fine as a treat, but not every week.’

‘No, of course not. I didn’t mean—’

‘He likes his own home – he feels safe here. Once you get to know him, you’ll understand.’

We seemed to be talking as if I’d already got the job. ‘Is Noah around?’ I asked.

‘Yes. Would you like to meet him?’

I nodded. ‘Please. If that’s okay.’

Edward went into the hallway and called up the stairs. Left briefly alone, I glanced around the room, expecting to see family photos, but there wasn’t a single image of the dead wife. Instead, there were several pictures of two young women whom I later discovered were Edward’s grown-up daughters, Tara and Georgia.

A minute later, a boy appeared. He was a miniature version of his father, with bright blue eyes and a shock of jet-black hair that patently hadn’t seen a brush in a while.

‘This is Lily,’ Edward said. ‘She’s going to be your new teacher.’ He quickly turned to me. ‘At least, I hope she is.’

‘Hi, Noah.’ I smiled at him and he almost smiled back.

‘Will I have to do maths?’ he asked.

‘Yes. Some. But we’ll do other stuff. Reading, writing, making up stories… some science, a bit of history. And art, of course. I hear you like drawing.’

‘Yes, but I’m not very good at it.’

‘I bet you are, but it doesn’t matter as long as you enjoy it. I’d really love to see your pictures sometime.’

‘Really? Okay.’ He seemed genuinely pleased and surprised that I was interested. My heart went out to him. I felt an immediate bond with this small, gentle soul, and wanted to prise him out of his shell. But it didn’t occur to me for one second that one day I would be his stepmother.

Edward returned to the table and the restaurant suddenly came back into focus. ‘Glad you like your ring,’ he said, sitting back down.

‘I love it.’

‘Would you like to see the dessert menu?’

‘No thanks. I think we should go home now, don’t you?’

‘Good idea.’ He called for the bill.

‘I’ve been wondering about Noah. How do you think he’ll take the news?’

Edward considered for a few moments. ‘I’m not sure. I think if we play it down, don’t make a big thing of it, he should be okay. He thinks the world of you, so hopefully…’ His face clouded over. ‘It’s Tara and Georgia I’m more worried about.’

‘Really? I thought we got along.’

‘You do, they like you. It’s just that… me having a girlfriend is one thing, but marrying again? That’s a big change for them.’ He picked up his napkin and folded it nervously. ‘Tara’s so volatile, you never know how she’s going to react. Georgia’s more easy-going, but she usually follows big sis.’

‘They’re both grown up. They should understand,’ I said firmly. ‘Clare died five years ago – why shouldn’t you move on with your life?’

‘Yes, you’re right,’ he said, taking my hands. ‘I’m sure they’ll be happy for us, once they’ve got over the shock. We’ll invite them over to Sunday lunch, tell them at the same time. You know how competitive they are.’

‘Whatever you think best.’

Edward settled the bill and we took a taxi back to his house. The champagne and excellent food, not to mention the beautiful rock on my finger, were making me feel hot and fuzzy around the edges. We kissed and cuddled on the back seat like a couple of teenagers. I couldn’t wait to get back to the house and show Edward how much I loved him, but Georgia was babysitting and would be staying the night in her old bedroom. Edward always felt inhibited when the girls were around. The real celebration of our engagement would have to wait.

‘It’s just occurred to me,’ I said as we pulled up outside the front gates. ‘Georgia will spot the ring straight away.’

He grimaced. ‘Shit, you’re right. Sorry, darling, would you mind taking it off? Just for now.’

‘No worries.’

He fished the box out of his pocket. I gave my hand one last admiring look, then removed the ring and put it back on its cushion. The lid closed with a snap. It was a shame to be parted from it so soon, but I understood. At least, I thought I did.

The following day, once I’d finished teaching, I told Edward I was going back to my place for the night.

‘Do you have to?’ he said. ‘I thought we could spend the evening looking at the calendar. We need to pick a date for the wedding. Make some plans…’

‘I really want to do that, but there’s no rush, is there? I need to pick up some clean clothes, do a few chores, that kind of stuff.’ I also wanted to tell Marsha that I was getting married and moving out of her flat for good.

Edward shrugged resignedly. ‘Okay, you can stay at Marsha’s one night, but no longer.’

I gave him an arch look. ‘I assume that’s a joke.’

‘Of course it is. I can’t bear sleeping alone any more, that’s all.’ He kissed me goodbye as if we weren’t going to see each other again for months.

Soon after I left the house, I took my engagement ring out of its box and put it back on. It felt strange and heavy on my finger, and as I walked down the hill towards the Tube station, I wondered if I would ever get used to wearing it. I didn’t normally bother with jewellery – a pair of discreet stud earrings or a simple silver chain around my neck was about as far as it went. My mother would be thrilled when she saw the diamond, of that I had no doubt, but I was less confident of Marsha’s reaction. She was a defiant singleton and hated anything that smacked of male possessiveness. Not that I saw my engagement ring in that way. For me, it was simply a sign of Edward’s love and generosity.

Marsha’s flat was a period conversion on the first and second floors of an Edwardian terrace. As soon as I got in, I set about preparing dinner. It had been weeks since we’d sat down to eat together, and as I chopped some onions and peppers for a pasta sauce, I reflected that I hadn’t been a very good flatmate of late. Now I was about to desert her altogether. Marsha and I had been close since childhood. She had taken me in a year ago after I split up with my boyfriend Alex, pouring the wine, listening to me as I ranted and raved into the night. She was the only one who supported my decision to take a break from my stressful teaching job.

We decided to take a year out and go travelling together. Her career as a museum curator had stalled, and she was up for a change. All I needed was a temporary job so that I could save some money. Home-schooling an eight-year-old boy in upmarket, leafy Hampstead seemed like the perfect fit. I never had any intention of falling in love so quickly, even less of getting married. Now I was wrecking my plans with Marsha. I was sure she would forgive me, but I still felt anxious about breaking the news.

I heard the key turn in the front door lock and the sound of her footsteps coming up the stairs. I strained the spaghetti and started to serve up.

‘Hello, stranger,’ she said, smiling. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘I was worried you weren’t eating properly,’ I joked.

‘Oh yes, I starve when I’m on my own. But seriously, thanks.’ She went to wash her hands, and when she came back, two steaming bowls of pasta arrabbiata were sitting on the table. As I passed her the Parmesan cheese, my diamond glinted and she gasped.

‘OMG, is that what I think it is?’ she exclaimed.

‘Yup.’

‘When did this happen?’

‘Last night.’ I told her the story of Edward’s romantic proposal, and her eyes widened in amazement.

‘Obviously you said yes…’ She gave me one of her penetrating stares. ‘But are you sure this is what you want? I mean, I was expecting you to move in with Edward – you virtually have already anyway – but marriage? That’s a different league of commitment.’

‘Yes, I know it’s a bit sudden, but actually, I feel surer about Edward than I ever felt about Alex. When I’m with him, it’s like I’ve come home, like I don’t belong anywhere else. He feels the same. We love each other. What’s the point of waiting?’

‘You’ve only been together a few months, Lily, you don’t really know him. You come from completely different worlds, different generations. You’re only thirty and he’s a middle-aged widower with three kids. From what you’ve told me before, he was deeply in love with his wife. The whole family’s still grieving. That’s a hell of a lot of baggage to dump on you.’

I looked up from my bowl of pasta. ‘I have baggage too – we all do. I like the fact that Edward’s a grown-up with proper real-life experiences. I’m sick of relationships with boys who are afraid to be honest.’

‘Like Alex.’

‘Yes. Like Alex.’

‘I understand, but… dead wives…’ she muttered. ‘Such a tough act to follow.’

I frowned at her. ‘Come on, Marsha. I thought you’d be happy for me. I was going to ask you to be my bridesmaid.’

She put down her fork. ‘Of course I’m happy for you, and I’d love to be your bridesmaid. I just worry, that’s all. Alex hurt you really badly. If you’re marrying Edward to get back at him…’

‘I’m most definitely not. I’m completely over Alex.’

‘Okay, that’s good.’ We started eating again and I sensed the atmosphere easing. ‘So, when’s the big event? Do I have enough time to lose some weight?’

I laughed. ‘We haven’t decided yet, but Edward doesn’t want to wait too long. He’s sensitive about his age. It’ll only be a small, quiet wedding. Close friends and family. He doesn’t want to hire a venue or anything. It’ll be a registry office ceremony, then back to the house for a party.’

‘Oh. That’s a shame.’

‘He thinks it wouldn’t be appropriate. In the circumstances.’

Marsha frowned. ‘You mean because his first wife died?’ I nodded. ‘But that was five years ago.’

‘I know. It’s Tara and Georgia he’s worried about. Well, mainly Tara – she’s the spiky one. And Noah, I guess, although I don’t think he’ll take much notice.’

‘Hmm… see what I mean about baggage?’

I sighed. ‘Yes, Marsha, you’re right – as ever. But have faith. We’re both going into this with our eyes open. It’s not the wedding that’s important, it’s being married, spending the rest of our lives together. It’s going to be fine.’

As I’d guessed, my mother was far easier to win over. ‘Oh, I’m so thrilled! How wonderful! You lucky girl!’ she exclaimed when I rang to tell her the news. She’d never been a great fan of Alex (too laid-back, not enough ambition), and had been instantly charmed by Edward on the one occasion they’d met. Her enthusiasm waned a little when I told her the wedding was going to be low-key, but then redoubled when I sent her a picture of the ring.

Now we just had Edward’s children to deal with. I’d only met his daughters a handful of times. As Noah’s tutor, they’d taken virtually no notice of me, but when I became Edward’s girlfriend, their interest had suddenly increased. To be fair, they’d seemed okay with the idea, even though I was closer in age to them than I was to their father. Of the two, I preferred the younger sister, Georgia – she was more open and friendly. Twenty years old, she was following in her father’s footsteps and was in her second year of a business studies course at university. Tara, two years older, was what my mother would call ‘a cold fish’. She was about to graduate with a degree in fashion marketing from the famous Central Saint Martins and was extremely ambitious. The girls shared a flat in north-west London, the considerable rent paid by their father. Although very different in looks and personalities, they were inseparable.

Edward was busy in the kitchen, lovingly slaving over roast lamb. He was a good cook, but used to doing everything himself. I’d already learnt not to try to help, and was upstairs sorting out the last of the clothes that I’d brought from Marsha’s. There wasn’t room for everything. I still had several boxes of books and cooking equipment sitting in the garage.

When Edward and I had started our relationship, I’d hardly ever thought about his first wife, but now that I was about to replace her, the woman was constantly on my mind. I kept wondering about her personality, how she and Edward had worked as a couple, whether they’d really been as deliriously happy as he made out. I even worried about their sex life and whether she had been better in bed than me. I knew it was unhealthy, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself.

With no photos of her in the house and online searches producing no credible results, I had to create her from my imagination. Naturally I gave her all the qualities I felt I lacked. She was voluptuously beautiful, with long hair that fell in waves down her back. I gifted her a flawless skin, with not a wrinkle in sight.

Edward never wanted to talk about her; it seemed to hurt him too much. When I asked questions, I received the briefest of replies. She’d been an events manager, specialising in outdoor concerts – classical music with fireworks, ageing pop stars performing their greatest hits, that kind of thing. She’d had a severe nut allergy and had died after eating some bread containing sesame seeds. That was about it. Despite spending hours scouring all the usual social media platforms, I couldn’t find any more information about her. It was as if all evidence of her existence had been deliberately erased.

There were noises below. The girls had arrived, by the sound of it. I checked my face for make-up smudges and reapplied my lipstick, then went down to greet them.

‘Hi, Lily,’ said Georgia, looking up. ‘Loving the dress.’

‘You should have told us it was a special occasion,’ added Tara. They glanced at each other suspiciously.

Edward put an arm round each of them. ‘Seeing you two is always special,’ he said neatly, then turned to me. ‘Lily? Would you mind calling Noah?’ He led his daughters into the sitting room and sat them down on the sofa. I shouted up for Noah, then followed, perching on the edge of an armchair.

‘Lunch smells good,’ said Georgia. ‘Who’s the cook?’

‘Me, of course.’ Edward pointed to his apron. ‘Roast lamb with all the trimmings. Your favourite…’ He hovered nervously. ‘Anyone for an aperitif? G and T?’ We all shook our heads. ‘Where is that boy?’ He went to the foot of the stairs and called Noah again.

Tara twisted her mouth. ‘What’s going on, Dad? I feel like we’ve been summoned.’

‘Is it bad news?’ Georgia asked.

‘No, quite the opposite.’ Finally Noah slunk into the room. He barely acknowledged his sisters, and stood by the door as if in preparation for a quick escape.

‘Well?’ demanded Tara.

Edward came and stood by me, resting his hand on my shoulder. ‘I’ve asked Lily to marry me, and I’m thrilled to say that she’s said yes.’

There was a stunned silence. The girls exchanged a glance, but nobody said anything. Noah didn’t display any emotion at all. I realised – too late – that Edward should have told them on his own.

‘I know we haven’t known each other long, but we both feel very sure about our relationship,’ he continued bravely. ‘It’ll be a small wedding, nothing showy or fancy, but we very much hope you’ll join us.’

‘Can I go now?’ asked Noah, seemingly unbothered.

‘Um… yes, I guess so, unless you’ve got any more questions?’

He shook his black mop of hair, then scooted off. Another ticklish pause followed.

‘So when’s the big day?’ drawled Tara, without enthusiasm.

Edward smiled. ‘We’ve booked the registry office for the end of next month.’

‘Next month?’ echoed Georgia, somewhat alarmed. ‘That’s a bit quick.’

Tara immediately looked me up and down. ‘Are you pregnant?’

‘No,’ I replied quickly, silently adding, not that it’s any of your business.

‘Thank goodness,’ she muttered under her breath.

‘Shh…’ hissed Georgia.

‘One late accident’s enough, isn’t it?’

I cut in. ‘I would love to have a child with your father, but it’s not possible. I had an ectopic pregnancy when I was a teenager and had to have emergency surgery.’

Georgia gasped. ‘Oh, gosh, I’m sorry, how awful for you.’ She shot a reproving look at her sister.

‘How was I supposed to know?’ Tara protested.

‘It’s okay. I came to terms with it a long time ago,’ I replied smoothly. It was almost true. ‘Look, I want you both to know that I’ve no intention of barging into your family and trying to take your mother’s place. You’re grown women, it would be absurd for me to act like your stepmum. But Noah’s still little, he needs a mummy.’

Edward squeezed my arm. ‘And a wonderful job you’ll make of it too, darling.’ He turned to his daughters. ‘See? It’s all fine. Nothing will change. Life will go on as before in its normal quiet way, only I won’t be so lonely any more.’ He looked from one daughter to the other, and I sensed a secret unspoken dialogue going on between them. ‘I think I deserve that, don’t you? After everything I’ve been through?’

‘Sure. It’s your life, Dad,’ said Tara. ‘You don’t have to ask our permission.’

‘I know, but I’d like your blessing. We both would, wouldn’t we, Lily?’ I nodded, but I was starting to think I no longer cared about their approval, particularly not Tara’s.

‘Well, I think it’s brilliant news,’ said Georgia. ‘I was just a bit surprised, that’s all. But hey, congratulations all round.’

Tara forced a smile. ‘Can I have that G and T now? A strong one.’

‘Lily,. . .