Chapter One
“WE’RE HERE.”
Reed’s voice wakes me from the fitful sleep I’d fallen into somewhere north of Portland, the slap of wipers and sluice of tires accomplishing what bourbon and sleeping pills had failed to do for the past two weeks. I open my eyes to a wall of sodden gray the color of wet cement. I can feel it pressing down my throat—
I cough.
Reed swivels his head toward me, blue eyes feverish in the gloom above his white surgical mask.
“I’m fine.” I reach for the water bottle and swig lukewarm water that tastes like copper. “The others—”
“Behind us. Crosby’s driving like an old woman, trying to protect his precious Volvo’s paint job. Honestly, for a supposed socialist he likes the trappings of the bourgeoisie.” He grins, his bones sharpening under sallow skin. With all the stress of the recent news and preparations to come to the island, neither of us has been eating much for the past few weeks.
“They could have gotten lost.”
Reed shakes his head. “There’s just the one road and it ends here.” He points to something outside. A weathered gray sign. Land’s End. Pass at Your Own Risk.
I shiver. Reed places his hand on my forehead. It feels good to be touched—when was the last time we touched?—but I shrug it away. “I’m fine,” I say again.
“Check.”
I take the thermometer gun out of the cup holder and aim it at my forehead, peering into the fog until an electronic voice pronounces the number 98.6.
“Normal,” I say.
Nothing is normal. Nothing has been normal for months. Maybe longer.
I hear tires on gravel behind us. “They’re here,” Reed says. I want him to touch me again but we promised we wouldn’t until we were sure we were both safe, and Reed always keeps his promises. He’s gotten us this far, hasn’t he?
“Ready?”
I nod. A lie. I hadn’t been ready for any of this. Not when the first cases were reported, or my classes at the college went remote, or the restaurants and stores closed. None of us had.
Except for Reed. Somehow he had seen it coming and had a plan set in place when most people were still pretending it wasn’t real. Now he’s opening the car door and stepping out into the fog, moving forward as if the path is clear. I follow him into the mist toward a car that looks unfamiliar.
My heart rate speeds up, and my skin turns clammy. Reed had warned that the locals might not like us coming up here, carrying our contagion from the “big cities.” A woman at a rest stop outside of Portland had pressed her unmasked face against the passenger-side window and hissed, “Go back where you came from!” Who knows what crazed vigilantes might be in the grimy car—then I recognize Crosby’s beige Volvo beneath the mud splatter and Ada getting out of the car. Her curly red hair looks like it has exploded into a corona around her masked face, like the virus itself has surrounded her with its pestilent nimbus. The spark in her eyes, though, brings me back to the eighteen-year-old who greeted me at the door of our freshman dorm with a red Solo cup of watery beer. Now she’s holding up a thermometer gun.
“Ninety-eight point six, bitches,” she crows. “The only thing normal about me.”
“We have to take them together,” Reed says.
“Hello to you, too,” Crosby says, his loafers sinking into the mud as he gets out of the car. He’s wearing a plexiglass face shield designed, it appears, to show off his meticulously trimmed goatee. (He tends to it like a Zen gardener pruning his prized bonsai, Ada confided to me once.) “We just thought we’d check before we got out of the car. As a courtesy.” He holds up his wrist to display a temperature reading on his Smart Watch. I notice it’s the latest model. Reed is right; for a socialist Crosby likes his toys.
“We took ours, too,” I say, jumping in before Reed can respond. It isn’t strictly true; only I have taken my temperature. “No fevers here. Were Niko and Liz far behind you?” I ask, peering toward the road we drove in on. There’s nothing to see, though, as if the fog has already swallowed the world we’ve come from.
“We waited at the turnoff until we saw them,” Crosby says, glancing at Reed as if Reed hadn’t done the same for him. Shit. I shouldn’t have fallen asleep. Reed forgets things when he’s focused on a task. “But then we lost them a little ways back. I was too busy trying not to drive into the fucking ocean.” He gestures at the water, which I see now is on three sides of us. We’re on a muddy spit of land that dribbles out into the ocean as if it just got tired and gave up. Aside from the weathered gray dock with its ominous sign, the only other structure is a long gray shed with a tin roof the exact color of the fog.
“Maybe Niko stopped to take a photograph,” Ada says.
“In this pea soup?” Reed asks.
Ada shrugs. “Have you seen Niko’s work? Fog is like her métier.” She pronounces the French word with an exaggerated accent, the way she would at school when she was making fun of someone she thought was pretentious.
“Then she’s hit the jackpot here,” Crosby says, walking toward the pier with his hands in his pockets. “Is it always like this?”
“It’s Maine,” Reed replies matter-of-factly, going to stand a careful six feet away from him. “My father always said it was good luck to arrive on the island in fog. And for us it is; no one will see us heading out there.”
“Is there anyone around to see us?” Crosby asks.
“A few houses—guest cottages in the summer, a couple of lobstermen who live on this road—” He jerks his chin at the shed. “We can store our cars in the boathouse so no one sees them.” He looks back toward the road. “I just hope Niko and Liz didn’t run into anyone.”
“They know not to get out of the car,” I say. “They wouldn’t take any chances—”
“But if Niko did get out of the car to take a picture,” Reed says, “and someone did approach them—”
“We don’t know that’s happening,” I say, trying to forestall the train of Reed’s projections. Once he gets going, predicting each cause and effect, it’s hard to derail him. His mind is like a Rube Goldberg machine: once the marble is rolling it’s going to trip every hazard and spring every mousetrap. It’s what makes him a great city planner, and it’s what has gotten us this far today, but I can tell he’s about to spin some horror tale in which an angry mob of lobstermen are on their way here with harpoons. “We don’t know if she even got out of the car.”
“Then where are they?” Reed asks in the calm voice he adopts when he thinks I’m not facing the hard facts. Or, at least, the facts as he sees them.
“There,” Crosby says at the same moment we hear the car tires on gravel. But it’s not Niko and Liz’s yellow Mini; it’s a rusted orange pickup truck. Just the kind of vehicle angry vigilante lobstermen would drive. My mouth goes dry. How does Reed do it? I wonder. How do all his worst predictions come true?
But when a big man in a yellow rain slicker, baseball cap, and red bandanna tied over his mouth and nose steps out of the truck, Reed breaks into a grin and heads toward the man as if he’s going to wrap him in a bear hug. I’ve never seen Reed look so happy to see anyone, myself included. He halts a mere three feet away. “Mac, man, you’re here!”
Mac tugs the bandanna away from his face, revealing a sunburnt nose, and grins. “Hey, man, I’m the one who lives here. Where else would I be? I see you made it.”
As if we’ve arrived for a kegger. Still, I’m relieved. This is Mac, Reed’s best friend from high school and the one who’s been setting everything up for us on the island.
“Yeah, we did . . . or at least most of us. I’m getting concerned about Liz . . .”
“No worries, I winched her and her girlfriend out of a ditch a couple miles back.” He cocks a thumb over his shoulder and the yellow Mini appears as if summoned. It’s now a mottled yellow brown, as if someone had stamped a sunflower into the mud. A pestilent color. But then everything looks pestilent these days. When Niko gets out she’s covered head to toe in the same muck. Even her black spiky hair, cut so choppily I would think it was a lockdown DIY job, only it’s the way Niko’s hair always looks, is covered in mud. She’s not wearing a mask. I hear Reed swear under his breath.
“
“The virus isn’t transmitted through mud,” I say softly.
Niko grins, her teeth eerily white against her mud-streaked face. “I was thinking a good coating of mud might keep the virus out,” she says.
“Shut up,” Liz says, getting out of the car. She is mud-free, immaculate in soft drapey yoga pants, white cotton tunic, and a linen mask fitted to her face in a complicated pattern of origami folds. Her long blond hair gleams as if she’s been brushing it all the way up from Boston. It’s hard to understand how she could emerge from the same car so spotless. “Niko was trying to push our car out of a ditch. If you idiots hadn’t sped away without us”—she glares at her brother, Reed, even though ours hadn’t been the car directly ahead of hers—“you’d have seen us and been able to help. Thank God Mac came along.” She directs an entirely different sort of look in Mac’s direction, and I marvel at the elasticity of a face that can change its expressions so fast. It must be a family trait; Reed has the same ability.
Mac shrugs. “I just took one last beer run, but yeah, it was no problem, Lizzie.”
Lizzie? I’ve never heard anyone call Liz Lizzie.
“A beer run?” Crosby repeats. “Aren’t you supposed to be self-isolating?”
“Beer doesn’t carry the virus,” Mac replies. “I picked up a pallet down at Hanny’s Market, untouched by human hands since delivery.” Mac’s voice is calm and matter-of-fact, but he straightens himself up as if to remind us all of how tall he is, which must be around six five. His eyes, shaded by his cap, go a dead flat green, the same color as the water lapping against the wooden pilings. Reed steps between the two men.
“Mac’s following the procedure we set in place. New goods from the store stay in the supply shed for fourteen days before being stocked up at the house pantries. Right, Mac?”
Mac visibly relaxes. “Yeah, and I used my gloves while moving and washed my hands afterward. The stuff in the pantries has been there for weeks, clean as a whistle.” He looks around as if daring one of us to object. I see that we’ve formed a circle, with six feet between each couple. Mac’s in the middle of it. “Okay, then,” he says, “if we’re going to do this we’d better get to it. Tide’s going out. We got half an hour to pack up or we’ll be stuck sitting here with our thumbs in our asses another eight hours.”
“We’ve got to do the tests first,” Reed says. He opens the hatchback of our car and withdraws a YETI cooler. Last year we used it for camping out on the Fourth of July. It held hot dogs—Tofutti ones for Liz—potato salad, and beer. Now it holds seven testing kits. Reed holds out one for each of us, maintaining the distance of two outstretched arms even with me.
“You’ll need a surface,” Mac says. He grabs three weathered crates and lays one out for each couple. Then he gets one for himself.
“Okay,” Reed says, opening his kit, “it’s pretty simple. Remove the swab and insert it into your right nostril—”
“Why the right?” Ada asks.
“It’s just easier—”
“Only if you’re right-handed,” Niko says, shoving a swab up her left nostril with her left hand . . . and then leaving it there, suspended in the air, like she’s a kid sticking straws up her
nose to imitate a walrus. Liz laughs. Even from six feet away I can feel Reed stiffen. I know what he’s thinking: if the swab falls in the mud the test will be invalidated and we only have seven. They’re the new rapid tests that are supposed to be 94 percent accurate. I’m not sure how much he had to pay for them on the black market, but he’d come back the night before we left looking shook and Reed never worries about money. Before he explodes, Niko extracts the moist yellowish swab. “And now?” she asks, guileless.
“You stick it in this vial, cap it, and then swirl it around,” Reed says, not rising to the bait. My heart swells with love and pride for him. None of them knows how hard this has been for him, how much he’s had to work to keep it together for the rest of us.
We all do as he says, everyone but Crosby taking off their masks. Liz makes a face at the way the swab feels in her nose. Ada makes one at how it looks coming out and says gross the way she would in college when she found hair in the shower drains. When we’ve all sealed our vials, we place them on the crates in front of us.
“What happens now?” Crosby asks.
“It takes ten minutes,” Reed replies, setting a timer on his watch. “A positive turns green. A negative just stays the same.”
“Shit,” Niko says, “my booger looked a little green coming out. I hope you all won’t hold that against me.”
Before anyone can reply Mac claps his hands together. “Right. I’m not going to stand here contemplating my own snot. I’ll start bringing your stuff down to the dock. You folks need to move your cars into the boathouse—” He tosses a ring of keys to Reed. “Let me know if my vial turns green and I’ll just take a header into the drink.” He grabs three cases of beer from his truck, balances them on his shoulder, and walks out onto the pier, vanishing into the fog.
“What if he is positive?” Crosby asks. “He’s handled all the supplies for the island.”
“He won’t be,” Reed says, glaring down at our two vials as if daring them to turn green. “He’s been careful, and there still aren’t many cases up here.”
“That’s magical thinking,” Crosby says. “Have you thought about what we’ll do if he’s positive? Can you even drive that boat if you have to?”
“Reed and I can both drive the boat,” Liz says, “but it won’t be necessary. Mac would never endanger our lives.”
“Like that’s in anyone’s control these days,” Crosby spits out.
“Look,” Ada says, putting her hand on Crosby’s arm, “we’re going to know in just a few minutes. No use looking into a future we can’t see.”
As if to demonstrate the opacity of that future, she pulls an old battered purple North Face duffel—the same one she had in college—from the back of their Volvo and carries it up the pier where she, too, vanishes into the churning mist.
“Give me those keys,” Liz says, holding her hand out to Reed. “I’ll unlock the boathouse and move our car inside.”
Reed
remains standing guard over the test vials. He’s staring down at ours—or is it mine he’s staring at? Is he wondering what he’ll do if mine is positive? Whether he’d leave me here on the dock?
His timer trills with the opening notes of Beethoven’s Fifth. I look down at our tests.
Both are clear.
I look at the rest of the vials. They’re all clear.
“Thank God,” I say, hoping the test is as accurate as it’s supposed to be. Reed wouldn’t trust it if it weren’t.
He looks at me, a question in his eyes.
“Who were you worried about, Lucy?”
Before I can answer, the pier shakes and we both turn to see what’s barreling out of the fog toward us. As a dark hooded shape wielding a crooked staff emerges, I catch my breath. It looks like those cartoons of the Grim Reaper that were so popular ten years ago during the 2020 pandemic. I remember one carrying a carton of toilet paper, another wearing a mask. But it’s only Mac, the hood of his slicker up, carrying a loading hook.
“We’d better get going,” he says, “before the tide goes out without us.”
I let my breath out along with the idea that has seized me: that the death I’d avoided ten years ago has been waiting here for me all along.
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