The Day after Oblivion

by Tim Washburn

Genres: Sea Adventures; Cyberpunk

Synopsis

AND SO IT BEGINS . . .

In the United States, the Department of Defense and the NSA computer networks have been hacked. A nuclear-armed CIA drone has lost all flight control. North Korea . . . Iran . . . Russia . . . and soon the gates of Hell will open.

DEFCON 1—FULL SCALE NUCLEAR WAR

Humanity's most terrifying nightmare has become reality. Bombs are detonated, missiles are launched, counterstrikes are ordered, and within minutes, untold thousands of megatons have left countless millions dead or dying. Devastation of biblical proportions has fallen over the land . . . and the USA has been hit the hardest.

NOW THE SURVIVORS ARE ON THEIR OWN . . .

The death toll is incalculable. Following the devastation, there is no law, no power, no communication. But there are survivors. And now the real battle begins, on the ground, hand to hand, person to person. Can those who remain survive long enough to rebuild a world . . . or will it just take a little longer for them to die?

Release date: January 30, 2018

Publisher: Pinnacle Books

Print pages: 560

Sample

The White House, Washington, D.C.

As the group from this morning’s intelligence briefing filters out of the Oval Office, President Thomas Aldridge arches his back, trying to alleviate the pain that has taken up residence along his lower spine. The world’s escalating problems are reflected in the length of the briefings, this one lasting more than an hour. Not only are they dealing with the usual problems—North Korea, Syria, Putin—but a growing trend that’s threatening every major computer system, both civilian and government: hacking. And it’s gone well beyond a few private e-mails leaked to the press.

The Russian and Chinese governments have hacked their way onto the nation’s power grids and there’s a growing concern it’s only the tip of the iceberg. Aldridge knows from his daily briefings that the United States bears some responsibility for the enemy’s computer infiltrations. The computer jocks at the National Security Agency (NSA) were the first to burrow into the power grid computer code in both China and Russia, as well as in many other countries. Aldridge can live with a power grid détente. It’s the constant worry about infiltrations into the country’s most sensitive networks that keep him up at night.

Aldridge sighs and arches his back a final time before walking over to his desk. A tall man, it doesn’t take him long to cover the distance. He circles behind the desk and drops into his seat, reaching for his smartphone. Rail thin, Aldridge runs five miles on the treadmill every morning before most people are out of bed. And at fifty-six, he has the usual aches and pains but he’s remarkably healthy for a man who has spent the past three years lugging around the mountain of problems that come with his office. He slips on his reading glasses and pulls up the favorites list on his phone. He sends a text to his son Jacob, a high school senior, about his first-hour calculus test.

The fact that President Aldridge has a smartphone is a long-simmering issue between him and the Secret Service. The battle raged until Inauguration Day, when the service relented and presented him with a phone that had been specially programmed by the computer whizzes at the NSA. Now the phone is always within reach no matter where he is in the world.

With his son struggling through calculus most of the semester, Aldridge wants to be a supportive parent. He glances up at his chief of staff. “What’s next on the agenda, Isabella?”

Chief of Staff Isabella Alvarez consults her iPad. “You’re meeting with a Girl Scout troop here in the Oval at ten.”

Aldridge groans as his phone chimes, signaling a message. He taps the screen and chuckles. “Is it bad my son doesn’t have a clue about how well he did on his test?”

“I’m sure he did fine,” Isabella says. “Calculus was definitely not my subject. I think you either get it or you don’t. Unfortunately I never did.” Alvarez, forty-three, has the dark complexion and raven black hair of her Mexican ancestors, but her azure eyes are a gift from her Caucasian father.

The President thumbs out a reply, but before he can hit send, the phone powers off and begins to reboot. When the screen lights, a tingle of dread races down his spine. “What the hell?”

“What’s wrong, sir?” Isabella asks, striding across the room.

The President turns the phone her way. On the screen are three words—VENGEANCE IS OURS. The white letters are in stark contrast to the scarlet background.

“I thought your phone was supposed to be unhackable,” Isabella says.

“You and me both. See if you can get in touch—”

“Mr. President,” his secretary says over the intercom, “I have an urgent call from General Vickers on line one.”

The President picks up the phone and pushes the flashing button. “Earl, I think my phone’s been hacked.”

There’s a slight pause on the other end of the line. “That’s the least of our problems, sir. Both the NSA and DOD networks have been infiltrated.”

“By whom?”

“Unknown, sir. It appears our system is frozen. All the monitors in our office are displaying a single message.”

General Earl T. Vickers, director of the NSA and U.S. Cyber Command, disconnects the secure line to the President and immediately mashes another button. “Colonel, I want the best computer operators we have in my office forthwith.”

“Military or civilian, sir?” the colonel asks.

“Colonel, I don’t care if they’re from Mars. Send me the best we have.” The general replaces the handset, stands, and begins pacing the perimeter of his office while his mind clicks through the list of probable suspects.

Located approximately forty miles northwest of the White House on the edge of Fort Meade, the National Security Agency occupies a sprawling office complex dominated by two large buildings sheathed in dark glass. The black glass creates a mysterious aura, befitting the secret work that goes on inside.

Created in 2009, USCYBERCOM started at the back of the pack and remains in catch-up mode as they attempt to thwart the daily assaults on the nation’s defense networks. The man charged with the mission, Vickers, is a four-star who rocketed up the army ranks. A broad-shouldered man of average height whose salt-and-pepper hair is cut high and tight, Vickers has two advanced degrees from an Ivy League university. Unfortunately, neither is computer related, and the general is also playing catch-up, learning on the fly.

Vickers stops pacing when there’s a knock at his door. “Enter,” he shouts. That’s the other thing about Vickers—he’s not big on gatekeepers. If you want to see him, you knock and enter, if so instructed.

The door opens revealing a woman, early thirties, dressed in ripped jeans, flip-flops, and a T-shirt—all in black. Standing beside her is a man, approximately the same age, tall and broad, outfitted in khakis, a blue blazer, and a button-down shirt. Vickers waves a hand at the two chairs fronting his desk and works his way back to his chair. The woman saunters over, plops down, and crosses her leg, letting a flip-flop dangle from the edge of her big toe. The man straightens his blazer and sits, his posture ramrod straight.

Once both guests are seated, General Vickers drops into his chair finds it hard to draw his gaze from the silver hoop dangling from woman’s left nostril. “You two are my computer experts?”

“Let me guess—you were expecting a couple of good old boys?” the woman says.

If the general has learned anything since taking command, it’s that it takes all types to make a world, especially when it comes to computer programmers. He smiles. “I don’t care what’s between your legs, young lady, if you can get the job done. Names?”

The woman leans forward and grabs a foam football from the general’s desk. “I’m Alyx Reed.” She jabs a thumb toward the man seated next to her. “He can speak for himself.”

“Sir, I’m Zane Miller, working for the National Security Agency.”

Alyx leans back and begins squeezing the football. “Some shitstorm, huh?”

“How could our systems be hacked?”

“Anything powered by a computer can be hacked.” Alyx tosses the ball in the air and catches it.

“The NSANet isn’t connected to the Internet. It’s a closed system.”

“Intelligence operators all across the world have access to the system,” Alyx says, tossing the football in the air again. “The system may be air-gapped from the World Wide Web, but there are other access points.”

“Zane, are you thinking this could be an insider?”

Before he can answer, Alyx says, “The name Edward Snowden ring any bells?”

General Vickers scowls at Alyx, before turning to Zane. “Mr. Miller—insider, or have we been hacked by an outside group?”

“Unknown, at this time, sir. It’s going to take some time to decipher how they hacked the systems and we’re a long, long way from knowing who. But, sir, a more troubling problem presents itself.”

“What’s that?” Vickers asks. Alyx tosses the football to Vickers, who catches it one-handed.

“Good catch,” Alyx says. “If they’re on the NSA and DOD networks, you can bet your ass they’ve infiltrated most everything else.”

Vickers leans forward in his chair. “Such as?”

“Sir, whoever they are,” Zane answers, “they’ve probably spent years probing our networks, searching for weaknesses. Once they found a way in, they most likely spent many more months mapping our systems.”

Alyx uncrosses her legs and leans forward in her chair. “What Zane is trying to say is that they’ve got us by the balls.”

“But who?” Vickers asks.

“Won’t know until we know,” Alyx replies.

The intercom buzzes and the general’s aide says, “Sir, Ms. Alvarez is on line one.”

Vickers stabs the button and puts the phone to his ear. “Yes, ma’am?” He listens for a moment before hanging up the phone. “You two go to work. Set up in one of the video conference rooms in case I need you.” He scribbles something on a piece of paper and slides it across the desk. “That phone number will reach me anywhere in the world, twenty-four/seven. I’ve been summoned to the White House.”

Weatherford, Oklahoma

Gage Larson eases down his driveway, the gravel crunching under the tires and the vast Oklahoma horizon filling the windshield. Weatherford, Oklahoma, is a dot on the map an hour west of Oklahoma City. Once a hotbed of oil drilling activity, the town has returned to a sleepy little hamlet after the price of oil dropped through the floor. Now it’s back to plowing fields, baling hay, and rounding up cattle, unless you’re lucky enough to land a job with the new boom—wind. Gage is one of the lucky ones. Growing up on a farm, Gage has a lifetime of knowledge when it comes to fixing things.

The Larson family stretches back four generations in Weatherford. Gage’s great-great-grandfather homesteaded the original 160 acres after the land was released during the Cheyenne-Arapaho Opening in 1892. Over time the previous Larsons added to the original homestead and today the family farms 1,280 acres, a section two miles square. But Gage and Holly, his wife, wanting something different, bought ten acres and a two-bedroom fixer-upper on the edge of town. Now they can walk to get a gallon of milk instead of having to drive four miles into town.

The highest point in Custer County is not much taller than an average sapling, and the rest is flat farmland that spreads as far as the eye can see. This makes Weatherford the perfect location to harness one of Mother Earth’s most abundant resources. The road transitions from gravel to potted pavement and the tires sing along the asphalt. The morning sun is bright, and Gage fumbles around in the seat for his sunglasses. He finds them tangled in the seat belt and pulls them free, plopping them in place. A farmer on his tractor is raking cut hay into furrows to be baled and the sweet aroma of freshly mown grass fills the cab. Nearing his turnoff Gage watches the shadows dancing across the field as the massive blades rotate in the wind and he pulls into the drive and bounces across the cattle guard.

Rounding a bend in the road, he can’t help but marvel every time at the sheer size of the machines. The tower stands 260 feet tall and the blades extend another 126 feet beyond the hub, making the overall height 389 feet. In the distance, the towering turbines are lined out in a row that stretches for miles—ninety-eight in all. And Gage’s job is to keep them turning. Each turbine is capable of producing 1.5 megawatts of electricity, and the entire wind farm pumps out 147 megawatts, enough to power over ninety thousand homes.

Gage pulls up to the closest turbine and kills the engine. He steps out, grabs his climbing harness from the back, and pulls it on. The newer turbines are outfitted with a small service elevator, but it traverses only a portion of the tower, leaving plenty of climbing to do. He cinches the harness tight and ties a line to his toolbox and a small ice chest and carries everything inside the tower. He wedges himself into the small elevator car and punches the button. It’s a tight fit for Gage, who stands six-two and weighs north of 230 pounds. Although heavy, his weight is evenly distributed across his large frame. When the elevator stops, he wiggles out onto a small platform and begins to climb, the ice chest and toolbox dangling beneath him. The higher he goes the narrower the tower becomes. By the time he’s reached the opening to the nacelle, or hub housing, he’s drenched in sweat. In the August heat it’s like climbing through a blast furnace. Gage pulls himself through the hatch carved into the floor and immediately triggers the power doors that open outward away from the guts of the machine.

The view is breathtaking, with visibility stretching for miles. In the far distance, he can just make out the top of the newest skyscraper towering over Oklahoma City. He pulls out his phone and snaps a few pictures to show Holly, his wife, after work. Little does he know the photographs will be the last he takes of ordinary life.

White House Situation Room

President Thomas Aldridge strides into the Situation Room and waves down those rising to their feet. He pulls out his chair at the head of the table and sits. In addition to General Vickers, the others parked around the table include the director of Homeland Security, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs, the director of the CIA, director of National Intelligence, the vice president, and the President’s chief of staff, Isabella Alvarez. All are members of the President’s National Security Council, with the exception of Alvarez. In addition to the principals, deputies and aides line the perimeter of the room.

“I want to know how the nation’s most secure networks were infiltrated and I want to know who’s responsible.” Aldridge turns his gaze on Vickers. “Earl, how could they have hacked an array of supposedly closed systems?”

“Sir, we’re just beginning our investigation. The discovery of the infiltration only came to light when we received the message. It’s unacceptable, but finding how and who is going to take some time. With your permission, sir, I’d like to videoconference in two of our top computer experts.”

“General, I don’t care who you conference in, but I want some damn answers.”

Vickers nods to one of the technicians, and the large screen at the front of the room comes to life. On it are two people sitting side by side. “Sir, on the screen are Zane Miller and Alyx Reed, two of the best we have at Cyber Command and the NSA.”

President Aldridge turns his attention to the screen, where the names are superimposed under their images. “Mr. Miller, how extensive is the damage?”

“Sir, we’re in the very early stages of the investigation, but I believe we should assume they have access to most everything on both the NSA and Department of Defense networks,” Zane replies.

Alyx takes advantage of the momentary pause. “This is not a pimple-faced teenager hanging out in his parents’ basement. Whoever they are, they’ve most likely been in these computer systems for months, if not years.”

“How did they gain access?” Aldridge asks. “These networks aren’t connected to the Internet.”

“You need to eliminate the idea of closed networks from your brain,” Alyx Reed says. “If something is connected to a computer, it’s hackable. Period. End of story. All software code has flaws. They’ve probably exploited several zero days to penetrate our networks.”

“What the hell is a zero day?” Aldridge asks.

“An unknown vulnerability in the software,” Zane replies. “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, sir, but it could be months before we discover who the real culprits are, if at all. That said, the sophistication of this infiltration does lead me to believe a nation-state is involved.”

“For what purpose?” the President asks. “So they could post a graphic with this ‘vengeance is ours’ bullshit? That makes no sense. And why now?”

“Probably some type of triggering event or the last piece of the puzzle finally fell into place,” Alyx says. “If they’ve hacked the DOD network, how big a stretch is it to think they’ve also hacked some of the military weapon systems? We’ve known for years that our computer systems are vulnerable, but there’s so much dysfunction in this town nothing ever gets done. It’s only when the shit hits the fan that someone takes notice and decides to do something.”

General Vickers bristles at her comment. “Young lady, don’t forget who you’re talking—”

Aldridge waves a hand, cutting Vickers off. “She has a valid point, Earl. Seems we’re always playing catch-up.” Aldridge leans forward in his chair and stabs the table with his index finger when he says, “If this country is under attack, I need to know who the culprits are and I need to know today, not months from now. I want every agency with cyber capabilities working to unmask these bastards.” Aldridge turns his gaze on Martin Caldwell, secretary of defense. “Marty, get the troops working to discover if any of our weapon systems are compromised.”

“That’s a tall order. We’ll have to scour through millions of lines of computer code and that takes time, sir.”

Aldridge sighs and runs a finger around the inside of his shirt collar. “How can we narrow it down? Which systems, if hacked, would do the most damage?”

“Duh,” Alyx Reed says from the screen. “The nukes. There’re four hundred fifty ICBMs set on hair triggers that are controlled by computer code that was out of date when it was installed. That’s where I would start.”

“The nukes are secure,” Admiral Henry Hill, chairman of the Joint Chiefs, says. “The command and control systems are isolated from any and all outside networks.”

“I don’t know what it takes to get through to you, Mr. Four Stars,” Alyx says, her voice laced with a touch too much disdain. “Anything controlled by computer code is hackable. It could happen with an infected flash drive, a piece of malware that slips through the system, or a careless employee. And that’s just off the top of my head. Even here at the NSA, we have tools to gain access to air-gapped networks. You can bet the other side does, too. You need to wipe the thought of unhackable networks from your brain. They do not exist.”

“Duly noted, young lady,” Admiral Hill replies. “But I stand by my statement—the nukes are secure, Mr. President.”

Revved up, Alyx charges in. “Forget the ICBMs for a moment. What about the ballistic missile submarines? Are they secure? Are they unhackable?”

“The nukes are secure,” Hill replies, crossing his arms.

President Aldridge shifts uncomfortably in his chair. “Do you know something different, Ms. Reed?”

“As a matter of fact, I do. I think all of those stars on the admiral’s shoulders are blinding him to reality. When those submarines surface there’s a Windows XP chip on the engine that broadcasts the maintenance schedule back to base. We’re talking an operating system that’s years out of date and has more holes than a round of Swiss cheese. That XP chip is also connected to the submarine’s control systems. And while we’re talking about this tiny computer chip on a multibillion-dollar sub, that maintenance data is shared with other contractors via an unclassified network. Does that scare the hell out of you?”

Aldridge stands and leans forward, placing his palms flat on the table. “Admiral Hill, priority one is to determine if any of our nukes are compromised. Assign as many people as you need—hell, assign a battalion or two—but I want an answer before the end of the day. As for the rest of you, find the culprits. General Vickers, develop our options for a cyber counteroffensive. These people are playing in the wrong backyard and the big dog is about to bite back. We’ll reconvene in one hour. And to be perfectly clear, I want answers.” The President turns and strides from the room, Isabella Alvarez hurrying to catch up.

U.S. Cyber Command

Zane Miller unclips the microphone and steps around the table to kill the camera and the hot halogen lights. The temperature in the room is edging in on the inferno level and both occupants are perspiring. Alyx unclips her microphone and stands, arching her back as if feline blood was flowing through her veins. Lithe and lean, her movements are fluid. “So how did you get the name Zane?” she asks.

“Really? You just humiliated the chairman of the Joint Chiefs and you want to know about my name?”

“Four Stars is an overconfident asshole who doesn’t have a clue. So, Zane?”

Zane shakes his head. “My grandfather and my father were both big Zane Grey fans. I tried to read Riders of the Purple Sage and only made it halfway through. Not my taste. So Zane it is.” He works his way around the table and takes a seat in front of his laptop. “Back to the matter at hand. Who?”

Alyx bends down for a couple of toe touches before arching her back again. She walks over to her workspace and sits. “Well, we haven’t done much to piss off the Chinese lately, so my money’s on Iran, North Korea, or Russia. Could be North Korea and Iran in some type of collaboration. Those jackasses are passionate in their hate for us.”

“Could it be ISIS?” Zane asks.

“Too sophisticated for them. Unless they’re working in tandem with one of our enemies. But I think that’s highly unlikely. Hell, everyone on the planet would love to wipe those ISIS assholes off the map. Even if they are capable, which I find highly unlikely, they’re too busy watching for missiles up the ass to organize something like this.”

Zane navigates to the NSA gateway and enters his credentials. “I’m going to look for cross talk chatter about the hack. You?”

Alyx rests her long fingers on the computer’s keyboard and begins to type. “Look for clues, maybe a partial IP address. Probably a dead end. These people aren’t amateurs and I can guarantee you they’re spoofing. But, who knows, I might get lucky and find a stray address that slipped through. I think Mr. Big Man is going to be disappointed when his one-hour deadline arrives.”

“I’m not sure the President fully understands what’s required to find the hackers,” Zane says. “Unless . . .”

“Unless whatever surprise they launch points a finger?” Alyx says, leaning back in her chair. “Might be too late then.”

“Think they’re bluffing?”

“To what end?”

“Maybe hacking our most secure systems is the big payoff. Something they can pound their chests about,” Zane says

“Bullshit. Send us a message—and then stand up and give us the finger? I don’t buy it. Whoever is responsible has been planning this for years.”

Zane wipes the sweat from his forehead. “Meaning they probably have something big in the works.”

“Don’t worry, Zane. Four Stars says we’re safe . . . the conceited asshole. All those weapon computer programs are older than Methuselah.”

Zane takes a moment to survey his new partner. Tall at five-eight, Alyx’s bottle-black hair is sheered close to the skull on one side while the other half remains long, cascading down to conceal a portion of her face. The shorn hair reveals a left earlobe studded with piercings to match the one in her left nostril. He wonders what the rest of her body would reveal. “You married or have a significant other?”

“No and no. Have a couple of fuck buddies available when needed.” Alyx glances up from her keyboard to see the blood rushing to Zane’s cheeks. She smiles. “You?”

“Was and no. I spent four years in the army and the marriage was a hastily arranged affair we both thought we wanted. It began to unravel almost as quickly as it began. We were both deployed at alternating times. Probably had something to do with the unraveling.”

Alyx straightens in her chair. “Might have something.”

“What?”

“Maybe a partial IP address. Three numbers.”

Alyx copies the partial address and pastes it into a browser on the NSA’s network. She taps her foot, waiting for a response. The odds are long, with only three numbers and over six billion possible number combinations. She groans when the screen fills with nearly a million hits. “There has to be some way to narrow this down,” she mumbles out loud.

“Can you exclude locations?” Zane asks. “Focus the search on known IP addresses associated with bad actors?”

“I used fairly narrow search parameters. Or I thought I did.” Alyx begins typing. “Let me try something else.” Going with her gut, she narrows the search parameters and the list of possibilities is narrowed to a hundred, all clustered in one region. “I can’t say with one hundred percent certainty, but I believe the partial IP address resides somewhere around Shaoxing.”

“Are you suggesting the Chinese are behind the hack?” Zane asks.

“Not necessarily.”

Weatherford

Gage Larson pulls a rag from his back pocket and mops the sweat from his face. Although he’s working 260 feet above the ground, what little breeze exists only stirs the stifling heat around. The heat makes his job twice as difficult and exacerbates the fact the equipment is not cooperating. Today he’s attempting to replace the brake pads, and every damn bolt he tries to unscrew is being a pain in the ass. Much like the brakes on a car, the braking system is used to slow or completely stop the turbine in times of emergency. Although blade pitch is used to control the turbine’s speed, the braking system is the fail-safe to keep the turbine from destroying itself in high winds. Two skinned knuckles into the procedure, he finally breaks the last bolt loose. As he works the ratchet, his mind drifts to Holly.

Married for two years, Holly broke the big news almost eight months ago—she’s pregnant. Now she looks like she swallowed a watermelon, and Gage is slowly coming around to the fact that he’ll soon be a father. It’s not that Gage doesn’t want children—it’s more a matter of money. He’s making about half of what he made in the oil patch and Holly’s paycheck as a teacher barely covers the debt on the new tractor and ten head of cattle they purchased last year. By the end of the month, they’re lucky if they have two quarters to rub together. Being able to afford everything raising a child demands is a concern weighing heavily on Gage’s mind. He thought about selling some of the cattle or the tractor, but the cattle are moneymakers and the tractor is an essential tool. He sighs. He’s going to have to come up with a plan because the baby’s coming despite his misgivings.

Gage works the last of the bolts loose and pulls the heavy caliper away from the large steel wheel. The wind sends a blast of brake dust up his nose and he sets the caliper aside and stands to clear his nostrils. In the distance, an AWACS plane is taking off from Tinker Air Force Base in Oklahoma City. The large round radar dome mounted at the rear looks like a foreign appendage, much like a suckerfish on a shark. Gage recalls one of his buddies telling him the jets travel all over the globe, spending days in the air while being refueled by aerial tankers. That same friend also told Gage that Tinker Air Force Base has a big red X on it if something were to ever happen. But that’s a worry for another day, Gage thinks—or hopefully never.

Watching the jet climb higher into the azure sky sparks a yearning that he quickly tamps down. While the crew flies off to parts unknown, Gage knows, without a college degree, he’ll likely be working similar jobs the rest of his life. He did attend the local college to pick up a certificate that allows him to work on the turbines. And it’s not that he lacks intelligence—he’s plenty smart. It’s just that he finds the classroom boring, especially discussing this theory or that theory without ever accomplishing a meaningful task. Gage is more of a doer. He turns away and pulls a bottle of water from the ice chest and unscrews the cap. After guzzling most of it, he pours the remainder over his head and tosses the empty bottle back into the ice chest and returns to the job.

Working to install the new brake pads, a task he’s performed numerous times, his mind drifts again to Holly. She moved to town her junior year of high school, and it took Gage most of the year to convince her to go out on a date. That date stretched into their senior year, but the relationship hit a rocky patch when she left for Norman and the University of Oklahoma. She couldn’t understand why Gage didn’t want to “better himself”—her words—by getting a college degree. During her sophomore and junior years the relationship withered on the vine. Gage dated around, but spent most of his time moping. The other girls around town weren’t like Holly. Not even close. His greatest fear was that she’d find a frat boy and move to the other side of the world. During her senior year, when thoughts turned to life after college, she and Gage would share an occasional dinner when she was back in town. It wasn’t until Holly decided to return home to begin her teaching career that the last fragments of the smoldering fire reignited. Two years later they married.

A smile plays across Gage’s face as he recalls the honeymoon in Cancún. But the smile quickly fades because thinking about their time frolicking in the sun and bedroom is not going to do anyone a bit of good, especially with Holly e