The Broposal

by Sonora Reyes

Genres: Family Life; Hispanic & Latino; Contemporary Romance

Synopsis

When best bros say fake “I do’s,” will their friendship survive?
 
It’s about time roommates Alejandro and Kenny get married. Or at least, that’s what all their close friends and family think when they announce their engagement. The kicker? The two are faking their whole relationship so Alejandro can get a green card. But if Han was going to marry anyone, it would be his ride or die since second grade. Han has never been able to put down roots, and the only one who truly breaks through his walls is Kenny.

Sweet, sensitive Kenny is newly single, and what better distraction from his soul-sucking relationship than proposing marriage to Han? Kenny can’t think of anything more fun than spending his life with his best friend, even if it’s just for a piece of paper. But as Kenny keeps up the charade, he’s soon struggling to resist their sizzling chemistry.

The line between fact and fiction begins to blur the closer they get to their wedding date. With all eyes on Han and Kenny—including a meddling ex and immigration officers—will these two bros make it down the altar for real?

Release date: January 21, 2025

Publisher: Grand Central Publishing

Print pages: 352

Sample

Hello? Han? Are you listening?”

I jolted, realizing I was paying more attention to the fake bioluminescent jellyfish in the tank next to my desk than the email on my screen or the girlfriend talking on my phone. Well, ex.

Even if the ones in my room weren’t real, jellyfish were a hell of a lot more fun to think about than getting fired or breaking up, even if I was the one doing the dumping. For one, jellyfish were pretty fucking rad.

Jellyfish didn’t have girlfriends.

Jellyfish didn’t have to work for a company that promised to sponsor unsuspecting immigrants’ work visas only to fire them over email without warning.

Jellyfish didn’t even age, bro. Those Benjamin Button motherfuckers can just de-age themselves back to childhood, to their polyp stage, whenever they’re in severe stress.

“Hello? Are you still there?” Tatiana asked over the phone, reminding me yet again that I’d just zoned out in the middle of dumping her.

“Oh, uh, yeah.”

“So, we can still go to the ball, right?” she asked, as if she hadn’t heard the words I think we should break up. We’d planned to go to a drag ball together since my cousin Leti would be emceeing tonight. “One last date?”

I paused to think about it. Scoring another date with the girl I just dumped was definitely not a part of the plan, but what the hell? We’d only been together-ish for a few weeks, so it made sense that she wasn’t too, well, broken up by it (heh). But I had still expected at least a little bit of pushback. Whatever. As long as Tatiana knew we weren’t together, I didn’t mind hanging out as friends. Especially if it’d get my mind off my newfound lack of a job. Without the ball to distract me, I would have beaten myself up all night. Maybe my boss found out I’d been applying for other jobs that would have also sponsored my work visa. A fireable offense, apparently.

I was happy to go to the ball with Tatiana instead of spiraling about the universe wanting me to suffer.

“Oh, uh… sure? Yeah, let’s go to the ball,” I finally said, quickly shooting Kenny a text saying Tatiana would still be needing a ride even though we were broken up.

“Good, I was really excited for that.” I could hear Tatiana’s smile over the phone, completely unfazed by having been dumped.

“Me too,” I admitted, chuckling to myself.

If commitment didn’t scare the living shit out of me, I might have ended up with someone like Tatiana. According to my best friend/roommate/honorary family member Kenny, she was perfect for me. Even though she worked at the same restaurant as Kenny and was good friends with Leti, it never annoyed me to spend extra time with her. What more could a guy ask for in a relationship?

Not to mention, she was beautiful. Her dark brown skin matched the shade of her eyes almost perfectly, and she wore her makeup like art. She really was the whole package. If I was ever going to fall in love. Which, let’s be real—wasn’t gonna happen.

Because, as with all the other girls I dated, I felt nothing for Tatiana. It didn’t matter how perfect she was; the spark and passion just never came. And even if it miraculously did one day, it wouldn’t change a thing. It wasn’t that I didn’t like the idea of romance. But real romance—the kind you could completely lose yourself in, the kind people spent entire lifetimes maintaining, wanting nothing more in life than each other—it just wasn’t in the cards for me. It was too dangerous. Too risky. So, I always made sure to end things before they had a chance to get there.

Besides, being undocumented, I would rather not get close enough to trust anyone but family. Sure, I didn’t really trust anyone but family (Kenny included) with most information about me, but especially this.

“So, you’re not mad?” I had to ask, or I’d be convinced I was imagining the whole situation.

“It’s actually good timing. I think I might be catching feelings for someone else, so it all works out.”

We both laughed, and somehow it didn’t feel forced or awkward. The two of us were definitely better as friends.

“I’m so excited! I’ve never been to a drag show before!” Tatiana said, her voice sounding a little far away. I was probably on speakerphone while she finalized her costume. Neither Tatiana nor I would be performing, but it was Halloween, so we were all dressing up.

“It’s technically a ball. But yeah, there’s definitely drag. You’ll love it.”

I’d been to plenty of drag shows and underground balls alike to support my cousin Leti, who was basically my sibling. Leti performed almost every week, but tonight they were more than performing. Tonight, Leti was the emcee.

I had to admit I was relieved Tatiana still wanted to go. Kenny was bringing his girlfriend, and the three of us alone was bad news. Hell, me around Jackie at all was bad news.

“Oh, Kenny’s here. See you soon!” Tatiana said before hanging up the phone. Since she lived closer to Jackie’s house than our apartment, Kenny would be picking Tatiana up first, then me.

About fifteen minutes later, Kenny’s car horn in the parking lot beckoned me. I took one final look in the mirror before leaving. I was already in my costume, since I’d planned on going as a third wheel with Kenny and Jackie after breaking up with Tatiana.

Cowboy—an easy choice. All I had to do was raid my tío Nacho’s closet for boots, a belt, and a cowboy hat—Nacho’s go-to outfit.

The blue minivan—Kenny’s dream car—was waiting in the apartment lot as I made my way downstairs. As soon as I opened the back door and scooted in, Jackie looked at me and then turned back to Kenny.

“What’s he supposed to be?” she asked. Jackie was the type of person who talked about me instead of to me when she was in a mood. Meaning, she was still mad at me from the other day, when she asked why I never laughed at her jokes and I made the mistake of telling her the truth: I didn’t find them funny.

“He can hear you.” I didn’t bother hiding my irritation. “And he’s obviously a cowboy.” I knew it was risky to get snarky with Jackie, but what did she expect? Her cold shoulder thing kind of depended on me being the only one to notice. Calling attention to it just made her look like an asshole, and with Tatiana as a newly introduced wildcard for Jackie, she wouldn’t want her first impression getting too tainted. As expected, she turned to respond to me directly.

“No offense, but if you’re going with the Wild West theme, wouldn’t a Native American costume be more appropriate?”

“Seriously?” I rolled my eyes, and Tatiana shifted uncomfortably next to me.

“Babe, that’s a little…” Kenny started, but Jackie was already backtracking.

“I was joking!” Jackie threw her hands up in exasperation. She sounded casual, but her usually pale cheeks were now almost as red as her hair. “Jesus, tough crowd. Let’s just go.”

Kenny obeyed, and Tatiana was quick to change the subject.

“So? How do I look?” she asked. Tatiana’s gold tiara kept the long black hair of her wig out of her face. She looked like she belonged on the big screen.

“You look hot,” I said. “Err, am I still allowed to say that?” I rubbed the back of my neck. I’d never been an expert in saying the right thing.

“You’re allowed to state facts, yes.” Tatiana grinned, and I let out a little laugh.

It didn’t take long for me to notice that neither Kenny nor Jackie was in costume. Even though I knew Kenny had planned an outfit—I’d helped him make it and everything. Instead, he was wearing his usual oversized sweater and ripped jeans.

“What happened to Dracula?” I blurted out.

Kenny slumped his shoulders, but Jackie responded for him.

“I just don’t love Kenny wearing makeup, you know? Doesn’t suit him right,” she said, as if it were totally normal to keep Kenny from wearing what he wanted.

“You know there’ll be dudes in makeup where we’re going, right?” I said, trying not to sound antagonistic.

I could hear Jackie’s eye roll in her tone. “Obviously. Kenny is different.”

“He’s not—” I started, but Kenny finally spoke up.

“It’s okay, Han. You did a great job on the costume, but it was a little itchy. That part was my bad. I’m fine going casual,” he said, talking slightly faster than normal.

“Nothing wrong with going casual,” Jackie said, turning to give me a glare that said I needed to shut the hell up. But her eyes found the backpack on the floor by my feet, and her face turned bright pink from embarrassment before snapping to the side. She stared stiffly out the window so her blush wasn’t too noticeable, but I saw it.

The backpack was Kenny’s “sex bag.” He had this bag stocked with condoms, lube, even things like handcuffs, rope, and sex toys—Kenny was a kinky motherfucker—and he would take it with him whenever he was meeting up with Jackie. I guess it was more convenient than just carrying condoms around in your pocket? I don’t know. Apparently, Jackie wasn’t fond of Kenny leaving it in the car when there were other people around. I had half a mind to rummage through it, pretending to be looking for a snack or something. She’d just take it out on Kenny though.

Once we made it to the main streets, the world outside the car windows started to zoom past faster than I was comfortable with.

“Whoa, slow down, bro.” Kenny tended to have a lead foot when he was stressed, but I couldn’t stand being in a speeding car. We’d be more likely to get pulled over, and that meant cops. I couldn’t be too careful, especially when US citizens were getting thrown in cages indefinitely for not having their papers on them.

“Sorry, Han,” Kenny said, his tone a bit flustered. But he slowed down, no doubt understanding the edge in my voice for what it was. Still, my anxiety took a few minutes to settle.

“Quit back-seat driving,” Jackie said when she noticed me glancing at the speedometer.

I wanted to defend myself, but I couldn’t say why I needed Kenny not to speed without outing myself as undocumented. So I held my tongue. If it was anyone but Jackie, Kenny would have defended me in a heartbeat, but he kept quiet. I shifted my focus out the window, ignoring the pang in my chest.

Now seemed like a good time to channel that jellyfish energy. If I tried hard enough, I could go back to polyp, too. Replacing stress with a calming childhood memory was a trick I’d been doing for as long as I could remember.

Close your eyes. Breathe steady. Remember where you came from.

My breath slowed, the sound of cars zooming past enveloped my imagination, and the scene filled out.

Zooming child-sized cars raced all around a large fountain in the middle of my favorite childhood park in Mexico. Children laughed and screamed as they pedaled for their lives. One of those screams was my own.

“Alejandro!” an anxious voice called as I lost control of the wheel and fell out of the circular formation.

I didn’t stop screaming in joy as the play car zoomed down the hill, going faster and faster until it was suddenly stopped by a thick tree.

“Alejandro!” the voice called again from a distance, though as she ran closer, her face was no clearer to me, even if I knew instinctually she was my mom.

The real car pulled to a stop much more gracefully than the one I’d crashed into that tree all those years ago.

Thanks to Kenny’s initial speeding, we got to the ball well before it started, so we were able to catch Leti before they got too busy.

Kenny and Jackie trailed behind as Tatiana eagerly pulled me inside. Tonight’s ball was at an art center that’d been decorated for the event. The walls had cobwebs, and there were pumpkin decorations on the tables. A stage and makeshift runway were set up in the middle of the room so the competitors could show off their personas.

All the categories were spooky. Kinky Kanines (werewolves), Sexy Spirits (ghosts), and Alluring Undead (zombies) in drag were scattered around, waiting for their turn to shine. Ballroom music played through the speakers, the bass shaking life into my veins. I wasn’t a Halloween fanatic or anything like that—that was all Kenny, at least before Jackie got weird about the makeup—but I always enjoyed Leti’s events, whatever season they came in. Being autistic, you’d think the loud music and crowds would be overstimulating, but these particular events were so familiar, they just felt safe.

I took Tatiana’s hand and guided her behind the stage to find Leti.

“Han! Tati!” Leti waved enthusiastically from across the room, then made their way toward us in style. They walked slowly to draw attention, snaking their hand around the shoulder of a would-be contestant and dipping, then twirling as they reached us. They wore a sparkling purple catsuit, a long pink wig, and a face full of drag makeup.

“My God, Tati, you look gorgeous!” Leti winked, “And, Han, you look… like my dad.”

I grinned, and Tatiana giggled at the compliment. She suddenly seemed way more Diana Prince than Wonder Woman. Still cool and confident but less like the star of the movie. Now Leti was the star.

“You look pretty great yourself,” Tatiana said, playfully touching Leti’s arm.

“As always.” Another wink. “So, Han, where’s your husband?”

“He’s with Jackie.” Kenny and I were voted “most likely to get married” in high school as a joke, but people still played it up whenever Jackie wasn’t around. She hated being reminded Kenny and I got that vote, considering she and Kenny were dating back then, and I doubt anyone voted for that pairing.

“Jealous she’s hogging up your hubby?” Leti gave me a fake pouting face, and I rolled my eyes. I knew they were joking, but just because I wasn’t a fan of my best friend’s cartoon-villain girlfriend didn’t mean I was jealous.

“Five minutes.” Someone came from behind Leti, tapping their shoulder. Leti peeked over to the common area, which was getting crowded. They nodded and shooed us away.

We walked back to find Kenny and Jackie at a table next to the runway, so we’d be getting a great view. Elaborate costumes were everywhere, some folks sitting at tables and some standing idly around. I was surprised Jackie had agreed to come. She was the type of girl who made fun of Kenny for being soft and expressing his feelings “like a woman.”

Still, inviting Jackie was the only way Kenny could come. She bounced her leg and bit her nails. If I didn’t know better, I’d think she was anxious, but that wasn’t Jackie. She was just way out of her element. Who even knew what Jackie’s element was—she seemed to hate everything that wasn’t her job or being alone with Kenny.

I caught eyes with Tatiana, who glanced at Jackie and back at me.

She okay? she mouthed. Tatiana just didn’t know Jackie for the judgmental asshole she was.

Before I could respond, Leti stepped onstage.

“Welcome to the Ghoul Ball,” they said in a deep, sultry voice I’d only ever heard them use for moments like this. As they introduced themself and the judges, I got distracted by Jackie again.

“Sorry, he’s straight,” she called out to a drag queen who was making eyes at Kenny from another table. The queen rolled her eyes and got back to her conversation, but I couldn’t push down the embarrassment in my chest.

“What was the point of that?” I said, arms crossed. “He’s not even—”

“Kenny can speak for himself,” Jackie said, and I let out a bark of a laugh at her inability to see the irony.

Kenny looked a little offended, and I realized he might have thought I was laughing at the idea of him having his own agency, so I went on to clarify. “You’re right, so why did you say he’s straight?”

“Because he is,” Jackie said through gritted teeth.

“I’m not though?” Kenny said, shifting uncomfortably. “We’ve been over this, babe…”

Jackie rolled her eyes. “Of course you are. You’re with me, and I’m a woman. So you’re straight.”

As a straight man, even I could tell Jackie was completely missing the point. “That’s not how that—” I started, but Jackie interrupted, again.

“I’m sorry, was I talking to you?”

“Guys, stop,” Kenny pleaded. “Can we just have fun for one night?”

Shit. I had promised Kenny I’d play nice with Jackie tonight, then immediately did the opposite. And there Kenny was with his goddamned kicked-puppy eyes.

“Sorry, bro,” I conceded.

“Is Kenny really the one you should be apologizing to?” Jackie said, arms crossed.

“Yeah,” I answered matter-of-factly. Why the hell would I apologize to Jackie? “You should apologize to him, too.”

Jackie looked like she was about to jump over the table and strangle me, but I elected to ignore her, turning my attention back to Leti, who was introducing the next round of contestants.

“Kinky Kanines…” they said suggestively, and three performers dressed like werewolves stepped to the stage. They had two minutes to dance, pose, and vogue their way down the runway in an attempt to upstage each other and impress the judges.

Once the music came on, the werewolves started voguing their asses off. One with furry thigh-high boots duckwalked down the runway to the judges’ table, then jumped up and landed in a shablam, her leg held up high. The other two faced off, posing high and low, trying to outdo each other with every beat. They twisted into positions that made my back and shoulders hurt just looking. Leti counted down on beat, and the music stopped so the judges could choose their winner: the duckwalker.

Between acts, Leti held everyone’s attention by clowning on the audience members’ costumes. Once the category with sexy Freddy and Jason lookalikes concluded, Leti looked at Kenny and shook their head in disappointment.

“I’m not usually one to go after family, but how can I not when this guy shows up to a Halloween ball like that?” Leti gestured their arms in Kenny’s direction. The audience booed, but Kenny didn’t miss a beat before standing to pose for them, which had a few in the crowd catcalling and whistling.

“Sit down.” Jackie tugged the sleeve of Kenny’s sweater.

Luckily, Leti moved on quickly by introducing the hero category.

We got another Wonder Woman (whom Tatiana whistled loudly for), a Hawkgirl, and a Sailor Moon.

Before the category was over, Jackie cleared her throat once the music stopped.

“I’m leaving,” she said.

“But the show just started,” Tatiana replied.

“This isn’t really my scene. Kenny?”

Kenny gave Jackie a guilty look. “Babe, I’m their ride.”

“Can’t they take an Uber?” Jackie asked.

My jaw clenched. Sure, I’d take an Uber if I had to, but it was kind of ridiculous for Jackie to expect that when we all came together.

When Kenny took too long to respond, Jackie snatched her bag from the table. “Fine. I’ll take an Uber. Seriously, Kenny, it’s like you’re his boyfriend.” While it was usually a joke, Jackie saying it made my face burn.

“We’ll take an Uber. It’s fine.” I felt myself getting defensive.

“No, no. I’ll drop Jackie off, then come back for you guys,” Kenny said.

“Jackie, are you sure you want to leave?” Tatiana asked, not knowing that reasoning with Jackie was like breathing and swallowing at the same time.

Jackie frowned. “Yeah, I should get to bed since I have an early day at work tomorrow. Some people’s jobs are important.” I wasn’t sure if that last comment was meant as a jab against me or Kenny (and Tatiana by extension), since they worked at a restaurant and I was at a boring office job before getting fired—not that she knew about that.

I wanted to defend myself, but… she wasn’t wrong. She worked at a shelter for abused women, which was an important job. And Jackie knew it and never let anyone forget it.

She turned away, firmly grabbing Kenny’s arm as she led him outside. I wanted to walk after them and tell Jackie off for putting her hands on Kenny like that. But I knew getting involved would only make things worse.

Jackie was the type of girl who needed constant reassurance that she was a good person whom people liked. Calling her out on anything she did just reminded her I was one of the few people who never gave her that validation. We had a hard enough time around each other as it was. I didn’t want to go making things worse.

I should have been annoyed, but it was honestly a relief to be rid of Jackie. Finally, I could properly ignore my problems and relax into the performances. It sucked that Kenny had to leave, but I would take alone time with Tatiana over a whining Jackie any day.

“Is Kenny okay?” Tatiana eventually asked.

I didn’t know how to answer. Kenny would have said yes, of course he was okay. But I wasn’t so sure.

“I don’t know why he won’t break up with her. She’s way too controlling.” I ran a hand through my hair. “She wants him to break our lease so they can move in together.”

Then again, if I couldn’t get another job soon, he might not have another choice.

“Oh shit. Are you gonna be okay if he does?”

“He wouldn’t do that. Are you kidding? He’s scared shitless of living alone with her,” I said, knowing I needed to get my ass in grind to get another job now. Tatiana nodded.

“Why is he with someone he’s afraid to live with?” she asked, as if it were that simple.

“Hell if I know” was all I could bring myself to say. If I knew anything about Kenny’s relationship, it was that it was beyond my comprehension.

It was hard to pay attention to the show after that. It’d been a few months since Jackie first asked Kenny to move in, but so far Kenny hadn’t budged. He’d lied and said it was because his traditional Mexican Catholic parents wouldn’t approve of them living together before they were married, but Jackie wasn’t buying it. (Kenny’s parents were the farthest thing from traditional.)

Lie or not, Jackie was getting fed up. She was nice enough when they’d first started dating in high school, but the longer they were together, the bolder she got. By now Kenny and I could barely hang out without Jackie getting possessive.

Relationships were always fun in the beginning, but I knew from watching Kenny’s that eventually it wore off and turned soul-sucking. When you let someone get close enough, nine times out of ten you ended up getting burned, and romantic relationships were the perfect recipe for getting too close. I vowed never to get to that point with anyone. As much as I cared for Kenny, no way would I let myself end up like him.

I hated that thoughts about Jackie distracted me from the show that was supposed to be distracting me from losing my job. Jackie somehow found a way to suck out the fun in everything even when she wasn’t there. And when the last winner was announced, Kenny still wasn’t back. Tatiana and I helped Leti and the crew clean up the venue while we waited.

Once we were done, Leti appeared behind me, throwing their arms over Tatiana’s and my shoulders, holding their wig in one hand, their face now devoid of the intense makeup and their black hair braided down their back.

“Have you ever thought about doing drag?” they asked, looking me up and down.

“Nope.” I couldn’t act for shit, and I had major stage fright. I was definitely more of a spectator.

Leti frowned. “We need more performers for the next show.”

“Sorry, Leti. I’d just embarrass you.” I laughed at the idea of myself wobbling down a runway in heels. I’d probably break an ankle… again.

“I’m not even sure we’re related. Whatever. Who’s hungry?”

Leti and Tatiana debated where to get food while I wondered how much an Uber would cost to get all of us home. I couldn’t be spending too much now that I was out of a job. Before I could call the Uber, Kenny finally showed up. His light brown skin was flushed and sweaty as he jogged over to apologize.

“Sorry, guys. Jackie and I had some stuff to work out. I didn’t mean to miss the whole thing.” He frowned, pushing his glasses up his nose with his index finger. “I hope y’all haven’t been waiting too long.”

“Didn’t think you were coming back,” I said under my breath.

“Of course I was coming back.” Kenny frowned like he was offended. I shook my head and sighed. Kenny was a good dude and always intended to be on time to things, but he also lived in the moment, so he wasn’t exactly punctual.

Leti leaned toward Kenny and cupped his cheeks in their hands, inspecting him closely. “Have you ever thought about doing drag?” They let go of his face and took a step back. “We need more performers for the next show.”

Kenny’s lips pursed to the side. “Yeah, kind of.”

I couldn’t say the news surprised me. Kenny was a theater kid in high school and was always looking to show off his acting chops. Plus, he was an incredible dancer. He would have no problem figuring out how to duckwalk.

“You should do it! I can do your makeup, and you can wear one of my outfits!” Leti squealed. “You have the perfect bone structure for drag. I can’t wait to do your face.”

I couldn’t argue with that. Kenny’s bone structure was…

Yeah, it was good.

“I don’t know,” Kenny said, looking conflicted. “Jackie would hate it…”

“Ah, yes. Heterosexual opinions are very important on this matter,” Leti deadpanned.

“I’ll think about it,” Kenny said, rubbing his arm.

“So, how are you and Jackie?” Tatiana asked. A bit forward, but I was curious, too. Jackie couldn’t have been happy that Kenny came back for us, but his flushed cheeks, sweaty forehead, and overall glowing aura implied they might have… Let’s just say they may have put that backpack to use.

“We had a really good talk actually.” Kenny smiled. A hesitant, but genuine smile. I made a note to myself to ask him about that later. “Anyway, I’m starving.”

“I’ve never been hungrier in my life,” Leti said, the back of their hand raised to their forehead in a show of drama.

“Food’s on me,” Tatiana offered, and I had to admit I was relieved.

After getting burgers and chili con carne at Blakes, we sat outside to eat. Being as hungry as I was, I started scarfing down my chili as soon as I sat down. Midbite, I vaguely noticed Tatiana laughing about how I sat next to Kenny instead of her, my “date,” even if we were broken up now. I was too into my chili to care, but Kenny turned his head and gave me a little smile that would look subtle to anyone who didn’t spend practically twenty-four-seven with the dude. To me, though, that smile belonged on the face of the universal chaos gremlin mascot. Which meant a prank was coming, but because this particular smile was directed at me, it must have meant I was supposed to be in on it.

His eyes flickered down to my lips, and . . .