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Synopsis
Cole is successful beyond his wildest dreams. He can have any woman he wants, but there's only one he can't stop thinking about: his childhood sweetheart, Ren. He's never forgotten his first taste of innocent love and the desire that consumed them-or the pain he brought upon her . . .
Her long ago brush with submission awakened a longing in Ren that drove her to walk the darker edge of desire. She's become a beautiful woman at ease with her sexuality and unapologetic about her need for a dominant man. When Cole finds her again, he's gutted that she belongs to another. Ren's current master agrees to give her to Cole for a short time, but then she must return to his keeping. And though Cole agrees to this bargain, he knows he will never be able to let Ren go again . . .
Release date: April 3, 2012
Publisher: Berkley
Print pages: 336
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Sweet Addiction
Maya Banks
PRAISE FOR THE NOVELS OF
MAYA BANKS
“Heated investigative romantic suspense… Intense, transfixing.”
—Midwest Book Review
“Definitely a recommended read… filled with friendship, passion, and most of all, a love that grows beyond just being friends.”
—Fallen Angel Reviews
“Grabbed me from page one and refused to let go until I read the last word… When a book still affects me hours after reading it, I can’t help but Joyfully Recommend it!”
—Joyfully Reviewed
“I guarantee I will reread this book many times over, and will derive as much pleasure as I did in the first reading each and every subsequent time.”
—Novelspot
“An excellent read that I simply did not put down… A fantastic adventure… covers all the emotional range.”
—The Road to Romance
“Searingly sexy and highly believable.”
—RT Book Reviews
“A must-read author… her [stories] are always full of emotional situations, lovable characters and kick-butt story lines.”
—Romance Junkies
Berkley Heat titles by Maya Banks
FOR HER PLEASURE
SWEET SURRENDER
BE WITH ME
SWEET PERSUASION
SWEET SEDUCTION
SWEET TEMPTATION
SWEET POSSESSION
SWEET ADDICTION
Anthologies
FOUR PLAY
(with Shayla Black)
MEN OUT OF UNIFORM
(with Karin Tabke and Sylvia Day)
sweet addiction
MAYA BANKS
Heat / New York
Table of Contents
PART 1
lucas
CHAPTER 1
Her laughter was the first thing that caught his attention. Vibrant and shining. So effervescent and full of unfettered joy that it arrested him and he couldn’t remember what he’d been thinking just moments earlier.
He turned, seeking the source of the captivating music. And then he thought he’d heard it before. When he was much younger.
A lifetime ago.
Ren.
The memory of her still had the power to make him ache.
So much regret. Guilt. Wishful thinking. If only he had it to do all over again.
He hadn’t thought about her in a while now. Not because she’d slipped from his mind, but because he’d willed himself to stop thinking of the beautiful, shy eighteen-year-old girl who’d meant the world to him when he was in his early twenties.
It still hurt him to bring her to mind years later. She reminded him of mistakes he’d made. How he’d hurt her when it was the very last thing he’d ever wanted or intended.
He scanned the interior of the restaurant, his eyes sharp as he took in each table. But he couldn’t find the source of the burst of laughter, nor did he hear it again.
“Is something the matter?” Damon Roche asked.
Cole turned back to his friend and dinner companion and cast an apologetic glance in Serena Roche’s direction.
“No, nothing. I just thought I heard… I was reminded of someone I once knew.”
Damon slid his hand from Serena’s arm and picked up his glass of wine. His touch never strayed far from his wife. His now pregnant wife. If Damon had been possessive before—and he was forbiddingly possessive of Serena—he was even more so now that she was round with his child.
The two shared a nontraditional relationship. Serena was submissive to Damon’s dominance in and out of the bedroom. It was a relationship that made Cole envious, dangerously so. Spending time with the couple he called friends made him face his past mistakes. Made him realize that if he’d only been more careful and mindful in the past, he could even now be enjoying a relationship like Damon and Serena’s with a woman he’d loved with everything he had.
But he’d hurt her in his impatience and ignorance.
He’d met many women in the years since. Women who were beautiful, submissive, willing to submit to him on a permanent basis, but none had captured his heart like Ren. The one woman he couldn’t have.
Until recently he hadn’t done more than touch or prepare women who frequented The House, the exclusive club devoted to sexual largesse, owned by Damon Roche. Cole was a frequent visitor. Damon trusted him. Only Cole had been trusted with Serena, Damon’s beloved wife, and even then his role was just preparation.
Only with Angelina had he allowed himself to become more intimate, to actually have sex and open himself to the pleasure of having a woman go quiet at his touch and command. But a part of him realized that Angelina had reminded him of Ren. And Angelina belonged to Micah, another of Cole’s friends, one he shared with Damon.
All of the women he’d allowed himself to soften around belonged to other men. Maybe that was why he was willing to indulge with them, because he knew they were no threat to his heart and soul.
“Is the food to your liking, Serena mine?” Damon asked.
Serena smiled. “It’s divine. I only wish I could eat more. I swear this kid is wrapped around my stomach, squeezing for all it’s worth. I can’t eat more than a small amount at a time, but then I get hungry. The result is I eat all day!”
Damon chuckled and lifted a glass of water before pressing it gently to her lips. “You need to eat. You’ve not been sleeping well lately. Our child is wearing you out. The calories will give you more energy.”
“Or just make me fat and lazy,” Serena muttered.
“Are you still set on not knowing the sex?” Cole asked, trying to maintain polite conversation. But he was rattled and the laughter had opened the door to his past that he tried to keep shut at all times.
A wistful light entered Serena’s eyes. She was a beautiful woman. Startling blue eyes and shiny black hair. He’d been drawn to her as well even though there had never been a question of her belonging to Damon. But again, there was something about her that had reminded him of his childhood sweetheart, and he often found himself unable to look away from Serena. And wish that he hadn’t messed up so badly with Ren, that they could have been older. Cole could have been wiser. Could have guided her as Damon had guided Serena. Maybe Ren would still be with him now. His. Beautiful, submissive, his treasure.
“There are days when I really want to know,” she said. She glanced over at Damon and smiled. “I made Damon promise not to let me cave even though he wants to know very badly whether we’re having a son or a daughter. He really wants a girl. I don’t care and maybe that’s why I want to be surprised.”
“Another girl in the fold would be entertaining,” Cole said. “I imagine Damon will be just as bad as Micah when it comes to his little girl.”
Serena rolled her eyes. “Oh God, don’t you know it?”
“She’s threatening to make me wear one of those damn baby carriers that Micah parades around in,” Damon said dryly. “He’s lost his goddamn mind ever since Nia was born.”
Cole snickered. “I’m going to remind you of this conversation when your own child is born. You’re overprotective of Serena as it is. I can’t imagine you’ll be any less so of the baby. Especially if you have a daughter.”
“Maybe, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to wear her twenty-four seven,” Damon said darkly.
Serena just grinned and stroked her fingers over Damon’s hand. Cole winked at her as if to say he agreed with her private assessment.
Distant laughter sounded again, sending a cascade of chill bumps up his neck. This time he reacted much quicker and jerked around, his gaze honing in on the source.
Finally, he saw her.
All his breath left him in a ragged rush. She was facing away, which was why he hadn’t been able to find her the first time. He could just see the hint of her profile. Smooth, dusky skin, creamy, beckoning his touch. A cascade of black hair tumbled down her back, going so low that he lost track of it.
She was petite. He could tell from here that she was a small woman, probably not much more than five feet. Her features were delicate. As she turned, he caught a glimpse of the slim column of her neck, but then she reached up and pulled her hair over one shoulder, baring the expanse of her back.
Her dress was backless and he froze as his gaze lighted on the tattoo trailing down her spine.
He couldn’t breathe. His fingers curled and uncurled as he stared, riveted to the sight. Almost in dread, he raised his gaze to her right shoulder, just over the blade. Would it still be there? Had the years been kind and diminished the reminder of his inexperience?
He couldn’t tell from this distance. Or maybe he didn’t want it to be there. A scar. Evidence of the care he hadn’t taken with a woman who trusted him with her heart and body.
Ren.
What was she doing here? It was her. The tattoo was unmistakable. Delicate and feminine. Just like her. A thin, scripty flowering vine from the small of her back to her nape. He’d traced it many times with his fingers, his mouth and his tongue.
Before he could get to his feet, the man sitting with Ren stood and extended his hand to her. She took it and gracefully rose from her seat. The man’s hold was possessive and intimate, a clear signal that he considered her his.
But when Ren turned where he could see her fully, Cole saw the wide silver band encircling her neck. It was a fist to his gut and he could only stare, so stunned that he couldn’t draw a breath.
He knew the significance of that piece of jewelry. It wasn’t decorative, although it was beautifully rendered and drew attention to her delicate features.
It was a sign of ownership.
A gift from a master to his submissive.
Serena wore such a symbol, but hers was a band that encircled her upper arm. Damon wasn’t a fan of collars. He found them demeaning. Cole agreed.
The surge of jealousy—and anger—that bolted through his veins took him completely off guard.
The man put his arm protectively around Ren, and she smiled up at him as they made their way to the exit. Power emanated from the man—a worthy adversary.
“Do you know him?” Cole asked urgently, glancing quickly back at Damon.
Damon’s gaze jerked up, his brow creased in confusion.
“The man there, with the Asian woman. They’re walking out now.”
“Why would you think I know…” Damon frowned and leaned forward. “Yes, I do, actually.”
“Who is he?” Cole demanded.
“He’s visited The House before, but not often. He prefers to keep to himself.”
“Who?” Cole asked again, his impatience an edgy burn under his skin.
“Lucas Holt.”
“What’s his story? Is he into the scene or is he just someone playing at the game?”
“He’s serious,” Damon said slowly. “His background checked out or he wouldn’t have been admitted to The House. He’s wealthy. Successful businessman. Owns several clubs both in Houston and Dallas. I think he recently opened one in Vegas. He spends a lot of time in Vegas but he has residences in Dallas and Houston as well.”
“Have you ever seen her at The House?” Cole asked. How close had she been all this time? Had they barely missed each other? Had she been present in the very place he frequented?
His pulse ratcheted up and he stood, the urge to go after her so strong that he was almost in motion when Damon spoke again.
“Sit down, Cole. Don’t make a scene. I’ll tell you what I know.”
Reluctantly, Cole retook his seat but watched the pair until they disappeared from view.
“Who is she?” Serena asked in a low tone.
She put a gentle hand on his arm, a gesture of comfort he appreciated, though it took everything he had not to snatch his hand back and go chasing after Ren.
Ren.
God. He couldn’t believe it. She was here. And she belonged, really belonged, to another man. There was a clear stamp of ownership for the world to see. He couldn’t even wrap his mind around it. He’d never imagined that Ren would have gone from their failed experimentation into a submissive relationship.
Jealousy. Anger. Rage.
Excitement.
Longing ate at his gut until his stomach churned and the food he’d eaten knotted into a giant fist.
“Tell me,” he rasped in Damon’s direction. He ignored Serena’s question for now. He had to know all he could about Ren.
Damon calmly sipped his wine, almost as if he were trying to infuse some of that calm into Cole. “I haven’t seen her at The House. But it’s been quite some time since I’ve seen Lucas. He isn’t big into the scene or into public displays for that matter.”
“Who did you see him with?” Cole bit out.
“He doesn’t bring his submissives to the club. When I saw him last, he was simply there to observe. He’s extremely private. He only has one woman at any given time. He’s loyal and he demands the same, but his relationships aren’t permanent.”
Cole frowned. “He’s a player?”
Damon shook his head. “I never got that impression. I’ve spoken to him before. Had drinks with him. He finds comfort in the women in his keeping. Most interestingly, he is completely faithful to his submissive. However, he has discreetly inquired in the past as to men for his woman. I think he likes to watch. Perhaps he even participates. But he himself only has sex with the woman in his care.”
“How the hell do you know all of this?” Cole demanded.
Christ, like he wanted to imagine Ren with other men while the bastard watched? He was a flaming hypocrite. He wasn’t so pissed he didn’t recognize the blatant hypocrisy in his anger. He’d had sex with a woman who belonged to another man. He’d indulged in Angelina more than once at Micah’s urging.
Damon shrugged. “We’ve talked on occasion. He’s asked for recommendations.”
Serena’s brow furrowed. “Are you trying to delicately state that you’ve been with some of his women?”
Damon smiled and lazily ran his fingers over her shoulder. “No, Serena mine. You of all people should know I don’t share. Even another man’s woman. I don’t look down on the practice. However, it isn’t for me.”
“I need to see her,” Cole said tightly. “I… have …to see her.”
“Is she important to you?” Serena asked, her blue gaze studying him intently.
“She used to be everything to me.”
Damon lifted an eyebrow. “I wondered.”
Cole sent him a questioning look.
“Let’s face it. You’ve had your pick of beautiful, willing women all but throwing themselves at your feet,” Damon said dryly. “And yet you’ve shunned them all. That speaks of a man whose focus is elsewhere.”
“I hurt her,” Cole said in a low voice. “I was young, arrogant, stupid. I abused her trust. She gave herself to me. She believed I wouldn’t hurt her. I did.”
Serena’s face crinkled in sympathy. Damon simply stared back, silent.
“I need to know how to find her,” Cole said. “I have to see her.”
Damon sighed. “I can invite Lucas to The House. That’s all I can do. I can’t give you anything else. He’s extremely private. Such a breach would be unforgiveable to him.”
“Then invite him. Make damn sure he brings Ren,” Cole growled. “I’ll turn this whole damn city over if I have to.”
Damon leveled his gaze at Cole. “What will you do if Lucas comes?”
“I don’t know yet. But I’m damn sure not going to sit back and do nothing. I have to see her. Damn it, she was mine.”
“And yet you didn’t keep her,” Damon returned.
Cole flinched at the reminder. No, he hadn’t kept her. He’d walked away. And he’d never found anyone who could occupy the same place in his heart.
CHAPTER 2
“On your knees.”
Ren slid gracefully to her knees, thighs open, lips parted, hands resting palms up on her legs. She waited patiently for Lucas’s next instruction, her gaze trained straight ahead.
“You were beautiful tonight, Ren. But then you’re always beautiful and graceful. I’ve no complaint in that area.”
“Thank you, Lucas.”
“As a reward, I’ll let you choose tonight’s instrument.”
“Your hand,” she said without hesitation.
He smiled and she thought he liked her choice. “Tell me why.”
“I like having the imprint of your hand on my skin. It’s a reminder that I belong to you. That you possess me.”
He nodded his agreement. “Open your mouth. Wider. No teeth. If your teeth touch me, you’ll be punished.”
The words were said more for effect than a true warning. Arousal rose, sharp and aching, within her. He knew how his words would fan the flames of her desire. Above all else, she enjoyed the sweet kiss of pain when he saw fit to give it to her.
If she weren’t so disciplined, she’d graze her teeth across his rigid length, but they played no games. No silly pretense of disobedience so he would punish her. They both had needs and they fulfilled each other’s need perfectly.
She supposed in a way that Lucas cared for her. Emotion had little to do with their relationship. He gave her something far more powerful than love. He provided security and comfort. He protected her, and in return, she gave him her submission, her complete obedience and her respect.
His cock slid over her lips and then over her tongue. She savored the first burst of musk and inhaled his masculine scent. He was rougher tonight, not as patient as he typically was.
He thrust deep, holding there until her chest burned. Then he pulled back and she sucked in a deep breath. He framed her face in his hands and slid his fingers around to the back of her head until they dug into her scalp. Then he thrust again, harder this time.
It was then she realized he was trying to draw her teeth. He wanted to punish her. He was in a mood tonight. He wanted to exert mastery over her, push her limits. For a moment she considered giving in and allowing him the bite of her teeth, but he wouldn’t want that either.
He was her master, yes, but he didn’t want a weak woman or one who gave in too easily to his silent demands. Yes, she was obedient, absolutely. But only to commands he voiced. If he wanted to punish her, he would, but she wouldn’t be an easy conquest for him.
She relaxed further around his impressive girth and allowed him to slide deeper into her throat. He made a sound that was a mixture of approval and frustration. He didn’t want her to give in.
And for that reason, he withheld his release for longer than usual. He was rough, relentless, and he showed no mercy. He was determined to push her past her limits, and she was determined to show him she had none.
She purposely blanked herself to everything but the task at hand. Outlasting him.
With a muttered curse, he tightened his hands on her head and poured himself into her throat, forcing her to swallow every single drop. When he finally released her, she rocked back on her heels, dazed by the power of the exchange.
Lucas breathed harshly as he slowly withdrew from her mouth. His grip gentled and he slid his fingers back along the line of her cheekbones before wiping his semen from her lips.
“So fiercely determined,” he murmured. “I wonder what it would take to break that restraint.”
Ren didn’t flinch because she knew Lucas wouldn’t do it. He had no interest in breaking her. Eventually he’d grow bored with her just as he’d grown bored with his previous possessions. And when he did, she would be cast adrift again.
He saw her as a challenge. She knew without false modesty that she intrigued him far more than the previous women he’d owned. It wasn’t intentional. It was just who she was. She knew what she wanted and what she needed. She had nothing to prove. She wasn’t interested in impressing her master. She did only what she needed to do in order to have her needs met. Pleasing the man she gave herself to was a need.
He held his hand down to her and she accepted the wordless command. He helped her to her feet and then guided her toward the plush leather chair where much of her pleasure and pain were doled out.
He settled onto the seat, still nude, his muscular legs splayed. His cock was semi-erect. Thick and long, it lay over the top of his thigh and she stared, suddenly overtaken by the urge to have it deep inside her body, taking, demanding.
More likely he would thrust it into her ass when he was through spanking it.
He pulled her between his legs, allowing his hands to smooth up her body, wandering over her curves, up to cup her full breasts.
Her breasts were a source of fascination for him. She was otherwise slender. Slim hips, flat belly, slender legs. She was slightly built and delicate, and he loved that sense of fragility about her that hid a core of steel.
But her breasts were full and plump, a contradiction to the rest of her otherwise boyish figure.
He toyed with her dark nipples, plucking gently at them until they were hard and pointed. But he didn’t do as she wanted. He didn’t take them into his mouth and suck.
“I’m glad you chose my hand.”
He bent her over, positioning her so that she was draped across his lap, her head toward the floor. He tucked his leg over the backs of her knees and then rubbed his hand over her buttocks.
She shivered and he chuckled softly. He loved to draw out her pleasure. Tease her mercilessly. He was hard. No doubt about that. He was ruthless, even. But he was fair and a generous lover. He knew what pleased her and never hesitated to give her what she needed.
Were their needs not so closely aligned, perhaps it would be a different matter. Perhaps he wouldn’t be as generous as he was. But they craved the same things. Him taking his pleasure spurred her own.
The smack of his hand against her behind startled her from her sensual thoughts. Fire licked up her spine when he followed the first blow with another in rapid succession.
He alternated splaying his fingers and keeping them tightly held together so the sensation was different each time he struck her flesh.
She moaned and stirred restlessly but his hold tightened on her until she was powerless to move and it only heightened her desire.
This was what she craved beyond all else. To be held completely in a man’s power. To know that she had no choice but to accept whatever it was he wanted to do to her. The knowledge was dark and edgy. It made her skate along that forbidden line where it was easy to fall off into complete darkness.
How far would she go? How far would she allow Lucas to go? She’d never answered that question. Had never entertained allowing things to go that far.
She trusted Lucas. Implicitly. But maybe even he didn’t trust himself to push beyond the tightly controlled boundaries they’d erected.
He continued to mete out the spanking, but it was a ludicrous word that in no way described the dance they performed. This was no spanking for an undisciplined sub. This was as sexual as fucking, more powerful than kissing.
This was where she got her high. Where she got so pumped on lust that she’d literally let him take her wherever she wanted to go.
She was barely aware when he pushed her to the floor, forced her cheek to the carpet and held her head down, his hand tangled in her hair.
He mounted over her—rough, crude, possessive—like she was a bitch in heat. He thrust first into her pussy and then dragged his cock out and up the seam of her ass. With his free hand, he applied a liberal amount of lubricant, but tonight she didn’t even want that. She wanted it hard. She wanted it to hurt. She craved the rough bite of pain when he forced his way past her unwilling opening.
His hand tightened in her hair and he growled low in his throat. “Open to me. Let me take what’s mine.”
As he knew they would, the words sent her over the edge. She arched up, desperate for his possession. He fit his cock to the tight ring and pushed hard.
She cried out but he yanked upward on her hair until she quieted.
“That’s it,” he said in a harsh, low voice. “Be silent and take it. You’re mine, Ren. Never forget that. I own you.”
He powered inside her and held himself deep, cupped over her body, covering every inch of her flesh.
She trembled. Her entire body shook as she fought the orgasm that built like a hurricane.
He laughed and reached underneath to press the flat of his hand to her belly. He slid his fingers down to the juncture of her legs and lightly touched her clit.
She clenched her teeth, closed her eyes and willed herself to control the reaction.
He was a master at knowing her body. Knowing what she loved. He knew how to talk to her, what words aroused her. How hard to take her. When to be rough and when to be gentle.
His fingers slid even lower, toying with the entrance to her pussy. He fingered her roughly as his cock twitched deep inside her ass. Then he withdrew, dragging that huge erection over distended flesh.
She moaned again and let out a sigh.
“No, Ren, you don’t get to come yet. I’m going to fuck you for a good long while and you’re going to be a good girl and you’re going to take it up the ass and keep taking it until I tell you to come. And then I’m going to fill your ass full of my cum and you’re going to beg me for more.”
And she would. She closed her eyes. She’d beg him never to stop. He’d come inside her and then he’d go back to fucking her until his hot liquid ran down her leg. And she’d love every damn minute of it.
CHAPTER 3
Ren stretched and glanced up at the clock. She grimaced. It was time for a break. Lucas insisted she not work to the exclusion of all else. It annoyed her sometimes, but the simple fact was, that if he didn’t interfere, she’d forget to eat, wouldn’t sleep and would work tirelessly until she collapsed.
And well, she was in touch enough with her feminine wants and needs to know that she loved that he took such good care of her. She needed that.
She put down the pencil she’d made preliminary sketches with, carefully pushed her drawings into an orderly pile and closed her sketchbook so the weight would prevent them from falling out.
Deadlines had little meaning to her. Once she got inspiration for the story she wanted to tell and the images began dancing in her mind, she was driven to work until the book was completed. Often that meant finishing well ahead of her deadline. It was an illness, this compulsion to be early. But it was who she was and it served her well in her career as an author of children’s books.
Rennie Michaels. A slight variation of her real name. It sounded light and fun and on the level with the children who she wrote for.
She got up from her desk and rubbed absently at a kink in her neck. When she looked up, to her surprise, Lucas was leaning against the doorframe, his lazy gaze stroking lightly over her body.
He didn’t often come into her studio. It was the one place that was hers. It was provided by him and he insisted that she be able to maintain her privacy here. Anywhere else in his home, she was his. There was no privacy. She belonged to him and he could intrude at will. But here was her work place and her place to be alone with her thoughts. It was off limits to him, a condition he himself had put into place.
She stood still, unsure of what he wanted her to do.
He pushed off the doorframe and walked into her studio, hands shoved into his jeans pocket. He was barefooted, as he typically was in his home. For a man as wealthy and cultured as he was, in his private sanctuary he was a creature of comfort, usually in well-worn jeans, a T-shirt and sometimes flip-flops.
“We’ve received an invitation,” he said when he stopped in front of her.
She arched one eyebrow. She didn’t know anyone here. She and Lucas had met in his Las Vegas night
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