Someday Soon
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Synopsis
THE PAST HELD THE KEY TO THEIR PASSION. . . AND THEIR FUTURE. Cammie Miller's career hangs on convincing Oscar-winning actor Tyler Stovall to play the lead in the movie that would make her a star. But she would rather die unknown than succumb to begging Tyler. Although ten years have passed, she still remembers the reckless night they once shared-and the hurt when he mysteriously disappeared. What Cammie doesn't know is that Tyler is running away from a dark Hollywood secret and that nothing can lure him back-unless Cammie can prove to him that their love is worth a second chance. . ..
Release date: October 24, 2011
Publisher: Zebra Books
Print pages: 404
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Someday Soon
Janelle Taylor
If fate were a woman, I wouldn’t be in this situation, Cammie Merrill thought. I’d be my own boss and my ex-husband would have no power over me. In fact, I’d be the boss and he’d be my slave. No, better yet, I’d be the boss and he would live on another planet…
But the truth was, Paul Merrill stood right in front of her, arms folded over his chest, ankles negligently crossed in front of him as he leaned against the edge of his desk. It was a pose meant to relax her, but Cammie knew better than to let down her guard in front of him. She’d had four years of marriage to learn the true merit of the man, and she knew his summoning her today did not bode well.
“Sit down, Camilla,” he urged, extending an arm toward one of the club chairs nestled against the wall.
“Thanks, I’d rather stand.”
His lips tightened briefly, then he shrugged. “You know the show’s going in a new direction,” he began. “We’re trimming a few of the lesser characters and focusing on the original cast. They’re the lifeblood of Cherry Blossom Lane, and let’s face it, Donna Jenkins isn’t one of them.”
Cammie met his gaze, desperately trying to get her suddenly banging heart to slow down. She didn’t want to feel this way. She didn’t want Paul to know how much he was devastating her. “I got you this job,” she reminded him quietly. “And now you’re firing me?”
The tips of his ears reddened. “It’s not up to me! Donna Jenkins has been around for three seasons already, and frankly, she’s about used up. Maybe if you’d created a more memorable character, things would have been different.”
Cammie’s lips parted in anger and disbelief. Before she could respond, however, Paul hurriedly jumped in again. “I know you tried hard. It just didn’t work.”
She regarded him coolly. Didn’t work? He knew, as well as she did, that she’d taken a walk-on part and turned it into a living, breathing woman who’d touched the hearts and minds of a sympathetic public. Donna Jenkins, her role on the nighttime drama, Cherry Blossom Lane, was a woman whose search for love had invariably led her into the arms of the wrong men, men who used her as a stepping-stone for their own ambitions. As a parallel for her own life, it couldn’t be more accurate.
“Now, I know what you’re thinking,” Paul said, spreading his hands. “But I had nothing to do with this. Everyone loves you here, but in a few weeks, when we film the finale, Donna Jenkins is kaput.”
“All right.”
His brows lifted in surprise. He did not expect her capitulation. “That’s it?”
“What do you want me to do, Paul? Beg you to keep me on?”
“Come on, Camilla, relax. Don’t be that way.”
“What way?” Cammie was too upset to meekly turn tail and run.
“I know you didn’t want me here,” he sputtered. “I know you’re thinking I’m behind this. But you know, it wasn’t entirely because of your famous family that I landed this job. People know me in this town. I’ve got a reputation.”
Cammie almost laughed aloud. She’d reluctantly helped him get hired on Cherry Blossom Lane only because he’d begged and pleaded and threatened her during the whole course of their marriage. But power was an addiction for Paul, and as soon as he was on staff, he set out to worm his way up the executive ladder. He’d succeeded, too, and had risen from minor underling to co-executive producer in less than three years.
But regardless of his assertion that she belonged to a “famous” family, she’d won her role by sheer talent and determination. Her famous family was really her stepfamily, and for reasons she didn’t like dwelling on, she was no longer in contact with any of them. Just thinking about them sent a frisson of discomfort down her spine.
With an effort, she pushed those thoughts aside and kept her focus on her ex-husband. “Well, I guess that’s all we have to say to each other.”
“I may not be long with the show, either, as it happens,” Paul said a bit reflectively.
“Hmmm.” His future didn’t really interest her.
Or so she thought, until he added, “I’ve been talking to some of the right people, and the Connellys have asked me to come on board.”
The Connellys? Cammie’s jaw nearly dropped, but before her shock could register, she gritted her teeth together and let her face register only mild interest. The Connellys were one of the hottest production teams going in Hollywood these days. If Paul were actually telling the truth…
Suddenly Cammie was angry, really angry. It wasn’t fair that he’d up and decided to get rid of her. And then to brag about his own continued success! It was unconscionable.
“You’re a real piece of work, Paul Merrill,” she told him flatly. “You make certain I’m fired, then you have the audacity to tell me that you’ve got a better job on the line. Well, if you think I’m going to congratulate you, you’re mistaken.”
“Look, I’ve got other issues here, Camilla,” he declared. “Don’t insult me.”
“Other issues!” she sputtered. “You took my job from me, and you know it. Worse yet, you don’t even care.”
“It’s not like that. Justrelax.”
“Stop telling me to relax, and stop calling me Camilla. You know I hate it.”
His sigh was long-suffering, as if she were just too, too impossible to deal with. “You’re always jumping to conclusions.”
“Oh, am I? You mean, you didn’t just fire me?”
“That’s not the issue I wanted to talk to you about today.”
She shook her head in utter disbelief. “Are you kidding? Forgive me, Paul, but it’s all that’s on my mind!”
“Come on, give me a chance to explain,” he demanded crossly.
“Like you’ve given me such a chance?” she responded, her voice filled with sad irony.
That, at least, seemed to penetrate. Paul looked away for a moment, but he recovered with more speed than the situation warranted. Throwing her a quick, assessing look she couldn’t quite read, he revealed, “I’ve got something else in mind for you.”
“Oh, thanks very much.”
“No, this is good. Great, actually.” He pinched his lower lip together with his thumb and forefinger, a habit denoting intense concentration.
Still reeling from his earlier news, she shook her head. She didn’t want to hear any more.
“Believe me, your part was written out on Cherry Blossom without any influence from me. The show’s got a bold new direction. You’ve been scheduled to the at the season finale for a long time.”
Cammie refused to acknowledge that she’d heard rumors to that effect. Rumors abounded on the set. There was a certain paranoia about being “let go” at all times in an industry where one pretty face could be substituted so easily for another.
“Well, it’s fact,” Paul said into the silence. He gave her another look as he dropped into his desk chair, propping his ankles on the polished mahogany finish as if it were a secondhand reject. “Okay, I pushed the powers-that-be and had you bumped out a little sooner than originally scheduled. No big deal. And it leaves you free to try other things.”
“Don’t do me any favors, Paul!”
“The finale’s fabulous. Judith and Becca are both accused of your murder. It’s going to be fabulous. The ratings will soar!” His eyes actually misted over. Paul Merrill was ready to swoon with delight.
“I’m happy for you,” Cammie murmured sardonically.
“Don’t get snippy. I told you I’ve got something for you, and I do. It’s big.” He slid her a sideways smile. His expression warred between excitement and a certain hesitancy, as if he knew his pending news wasn’t as wonderful as he would like her to believe.
Cammie braced herself. “What is it?” she asked, certain the other shoe was about to drop.
“Just a film role, that’s all.”
“Oh, sure.”
“A co-starring role.”
“Paul…” she warned. She’d heard that line a million times before. Half the time “co-star” meant minor character left on the cutting-room floor.
He waved her skepticism aside. “This is the opportunity of a lifetime!”
Cammie couldn’t believe his theatrics. Around the set she and Paul had made a practice of ignoring each other, elevating it to near art form, and suddenly here they were, talking as if they were almost friends. She knew better than to trust him. She’d been down that road before.
“Paulthat you can get me fired, then try and make me believe you’ve done me a favor!” Cammie inhaled deeply. “Words truly fail me.”
“You’re not listening. I’ve got you a film, for God’s sake. That’s what I was talking to the Connellys about! Summer Solstice Productions, Camilla! Do you hear me?”
“Summer Solstice?” Cammie repeated blankly. Summer Solstice was the name of James and Nora Connelly’s production company, and its string of successes was already legendary.
“Production starts next fall. This property’s red hot and ready to roll. And they want you!” he finished triumphantly, holding his arms out as if she should want to jump into them.
Cammie didn’t know what to think. She was still furious with him, but he seemed completely serious. A Summer Solstice film? Unbelievable. James and Nora Connelly were a young husband and wife team whose string of modest successes and last winter’s huge blockbuster film had shot them from obscurity to fame and fortune. They were the newest rage. Hollywood’s current golden couple. Everyone who was anybody tried to curry their favors.
Cammie didn’t believe Paul. She couldn’t. “They want me to screen test,” she corrected. “I’ve got an audition, not a part.”
“No, they want you.” He dropped his feet to the floor and leaned over the desk.
“What’s the catch?”
“You hurt me, Cammie. You really do.”
“You just fired me, Paul,” she pointed out sardonically. “Who’s hurt whom?”
“Oh, Cammie…” Paul sighed hugely and shook his head, but Cammie held firm. The way he was acting told her there was more going on here than met the eye, but to rail further against his letting her go wouldn’t accomplish anything. Moreover, she sensed that it was water under the bridge. Paul and Cherry Blossom Lane were the past and had been for a while, it appeared, even though she’d been the last to know.
“All right, I’ll bite. So, what’s this fabulous role?” she asked into the gathering silence.
“Well…” He steepled his fingers together on the desk, staring at them as if they held all of life’s mysteries within their grasp. Cammie suspected he was searching for the right way to lure her into the trap. “You’re being considered for the female lead in a romantic drama.”
Cammie didn’t move a muscle. She was certain she was dreaming. The female lead? Impossible! Supporting role, maybe. But even that was an outside chance at best.
When she didn’t comment, Paul clucked his tongue. “Here, you think the worst of me, but who do you think it was that talked Nora and Jim into using you? Who do you think that was, huh? Yours truly. Good old Paul. That’s who got you the audition.”
“Audition,” she repeated, catching him out. Her hopes sank and she dared to breathe again. She’d been right. An audition meant you were in a cattle call with about ten thousand other hopefuls.
Paul waved that aside. “Aren’t you listening? Right now you’re their first choice.”
“No.”
“Yes!”
“How?” she blurted out, furious with herself for the rising hope she couldn’t quite tamp down. If she didn’t watch out, it would suffocate her. “How can I be their first choice? They don’t even know me! No one knows me outside of television! How would James and Nora Connelly even consider a nobody like me? You’re lying to me.”
“I am not! You’ve got an audition on Friday. Because of me,” he reminded her tightly. “And a lot of thanks I get.”
“Paul!” Cammie shook her head.
“The role’s tailor made for you. Young woman trying to make it in the world meets guy, falls in love, gets pregnant, guy leaves her, she has the baby, then they get together in the end.”
“Now, there’s an original plot.”
“That’s just your part. The basic story is about a guy who loses everything to greed, then fights his way back to the top, redeeming himself along the way.”
“Are you for real, Paul?”
“Why do you doubt me so much? Here…”
He reached into a drawer and sailed a copy of a screenplay across his desk. It slipped over the edge and fluttered to the floor. Cammie picked it up.
“Rock Bottom,” she murmured, checking out the title.
“Read it tonight. It’s good.”
That little light of hope still flickered somewhere inside her; she just couldn’t quite extinguish it. Sighing, Cammie gave in. “What are you up to, Paul? Do I have to strip naked and mud wrestle or something? No, I don’t want to know.” She held up her hand as he started to answer. “Whatever it is, it’s no good. I’m not gullible anymore, Paul.”
“Read the damn screenplay! See for yourself.”
“I will read it.”
“Good.”
“Good,” she repeated tersely, staring at him.
Silence stretched between them. She watched Paul pinch his lower lip once again.
“You’re working yourself up to tell me something more,” Cammie guessed.
“There is something…” he admitted, grimacing a bit.
Cammie, who’d perched on the edge of her chair to collect the screenplay, now flopped back into the chair. “I don’t want to hear it!”
“Now, don’t get all huffy.”
She simply snorted her disgust, crossed her arms over her chest and tried to forget how much of a worm Paul Merrill was. What a jerk! He loved raising her hopes just to crush them back down.
“It’s not that bad. You don’t have to do anything on camera you might object to, within reason, of course. Nora and James just want you to help sign your co-star.”
“What does that mean?” she asked cautiously.
“They’re having a little get-together Friday night. At their house in Brentwood. We could go.”
Cammie stared. Things were moving way too fast. Was there any chance Paul was on the level? Summer Solstice wanted her? As far as she knew, the Connellys only chose from Hollywood’s A-List of starswhich Cammie definitely was not on.
Did I say A-List? I’m not even in the same alphabet!
“Cammie?”
With an effort she shook herself out of her reverie. “Help sign my co-star?” she asked, remembering the request tagged on to this startling bit of news. “I don’t understand. I don’t have any clout with anyone.”
“Well, that’s not quite true.”
“Who?” But before her lips could change from the “o” of her question, the answer sizzled across her brain: the Stovalls. Her famous stepfamily.
“If they want Samuel Stovall, they can certainly pick up the phone themselves,” Cammie stated tightly, referring to her ex-stepfather. Samuel was a Hollywood icon, and one of the most selfish men Cammie ever had the misfortune to meet.
“It’s not Samuel they want,” Paul said slowly, his eyes closely watching her face.
Cammie sat perfectly still; her brain strangely frozen. Some part of her had known this was where Paul had been headed from the moment he’d brought up her connection to the Stovalls. There was another actor in the Stovall family, and it was thinking of him that made Cammie squirm and feel heat invade her cheeks.
“No,” she said in a low voice.
Paul nodded solemnly.
“No…” she whispered again, not believing what had to be true.
“Tyler Stovall,” he said aloud.
Tyler Stovall…Hearing his name again after all these years had the power to turn Cammie’s insides to liquid. He was her worst mistakemore dire than the one she’d made by marrying Pauland the thought of him still held so much power that for a moment Cammie couldn’t speak. Finding her voice with an effort, she said, “He’s been missing for ten years.”
“You can find him,” he said with certainty.
Cammie’s aqua eyes gazed at him in disbelief. “Are you crazy? Tyler Stovall? Was this your idea? For God’s sake, Paul. You’re unbelievable!”
“It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Not that big of a deal!”
“You know him,” Paul pointed out tautly. “Better than anyone.”
“Not true! I haven’t been close to him in yearseven before he disappeared. You know that! For heaven’s sake, no one’s sure if he’s even alive!”
“Oh, he’s alive.”
“How do you know?”
“It stands to reason. If he were dead, the whole world would know it. That kind of news travels like lightning. No, he’s hiding out somewhere. Cammie, it’s Paul you’re talking to, remember? We’ve discussed this. You and I both know that, for whatever reason, he packed it in, left Hollywood and chose to live the life of a recluse in some podunk part of the world where no one can recognize him. But whatever sent him away is long over now,” Paul rationalized. “It’s time he came back.”
“Easy for you to say, Paul! We don’t know what happened to him. No one does but Tyler!”
“Look, I’m just being realistic. Nora and James want Tyler for this picture. It would be a great comeback film for him. They’re willing to use you if you can get him.”
“Otherwise, any number of starlets will do,” she stated with a certain amount of bitterness.
He spread his hands. “I didn’t make the rules in this town.”
“No, but you sure know how to play by them!”
“Camilla, come on. You can reach him. I know you can.”
“I don’t have any idea where he is!”
Paul made a face, as if Tyler Stovall’s disappearance had been perpetrated just to annoy him personally. “No one does. The guy’s a damn ghost. But you could find out. His family would talk to you. Hell, they’re your family, too.”
“Not anymore!”
“Well, they were once. Come on, Cammie. You know what I’m saying. This could be the biggest thing you’ll ever see.”
Her legs shaking from outrage, Cammie strode over to the desk, glaring down at her ex-husband. He straightened in his chair and smoothed back his thinning hair. He’d once been very good-looking, but now he sported that wellfed, too-many-steaks-and-martinis look, and his natural appeal had all but vanished. She wondered anew what she’d ever seen in him. “I won’t do it.”
“You’re slitting your own throat.”
“My prerogative.”
“Look, somebody’s going to find him. If you don’t do it, someone else will. Nora and James really want him, and they’re willing to pay a lot. Someone with less scruples than yourself will get the job done, and your role will go to an actress with less credentials and talent, but who’ll play the game. That’s the way it always is.”
“Your cynicism has rotted your soul, Paul.”
He half-laughed. “I don’t have a soul left, Cammie. I sold it years ago. You should take a lesson.”
“I’d rather the a painful, humiliating, grisly death.”
“That’s what the death of your career will feel like.”
“Go to hell, Paul.” She strode toward the door, feeling slightly sick and definitely depressed.
“Think about it, Cammie. Friday night. At the Connellys’ Brentwood home.”
She glanced back, so infuriated she could hardly see. And the worst of it was that Paul was right! Just because she possessed more morals and ethics than most of the dwellers around these parts didn’t mean it would turn her into a success. And that made her all the angrier. She wanted to call him filthy, low-down dirty names, and when he lifted his brows in challenge, she had to fight down the bile bubbling in the back of her throat.
“Fate is a man,” she muttered through clenched teeth, and was gratified at least to witness his look of total incomprehension before she slammed the door to his office behind her, closing his wretched visage from her sight.
Maybe it was because she never spoke of it. Maybe it was because Tyler’s father, Samuel Stovall, had been married so many times that some of his ex-wives, and certainly his ex-stepdaughters, were forgotten memories. Or maybe it was because Tyler had been gone for so many years and that she, Cammie, refused to think about him.
Or maybe it was remembering how close they’d once been…
Shivering in the bright L.A. sunshine, Cammie climbed into her blue BMW and headed outside the studio, waving to the guard at the gate for one of the last times. With a pang, she thought about the job on Cherry Blossom Lane that was about to end. A new chapter of her life was beginning.
Tyler Stovall…
Waiting at a red light, Cammie closed her eyes for a moment. Thinking about him wouldn’t do. Not now. Not ever. She wanted her association with the Stovalls to be a forgotten memory in this community. It was just too bad Paul knew so much about her history.
But he didn’t know about Tyler and her. Not all of it. Tyler, himself, might not remember that last fateful night they’d shared together, for he’d been too unhappy, too destroyed, and too drunk for it to be a complete memory.
At least that’s what she told herself.
Oh, Cammie, she thought for about the billionth time. How could you have?
Punching out a number on her cellular phone, Cammie weaved her way toward the Hollywood Freeway. Teri, the receptionist for her agent, Susannah Coburn, put her on hold without checking who was on the line. Knowing how busy Susannah could be, Cammie hung up. She would call Susannah later. Right now, she just wanted to get home.
Tyler Stovall…
She’d adored him as a teenager, and when he’d gone on to megafame, becoming an icon in the acting profession in six short years, she’d nearly fallen into a coma of delight. All those other girls might salivate over him, but Tyler was her big brother.
Sort of.
Tyler, for mysterious reasons no one seemed to understand, had disappeared ten years earlier. There was speculation he was dead, ill, or dying. People thought he’d run off with some woman he didn’t want the press to know about. While a Hollywood celebrity, he’d been hounded by paparazzi in the usual fashion and had been known to politely, but firmly, run them off his property. Once, if one could believe everything they read, he’d actually come at a trespasser while riding on his lawn mower. Tyler had simply pushed the man and his invasive camera into the water of a pond located on his property. Incensed, the interloper had sued himand lost. He had been trespassing, after all, and no one looked favorably on the viciousness of celebrity stalkers in the first place.
Glancing in the rearview mirror, Cammie encountered her own blue-green, anxious eyes. That anxiety was for a lot of reasons, not least the matter of her one night with Tyler. She’d never forgotten him; he probably didn’t remember. But if she should encounter him again…then, what? How could she ever explain that sleeping with him while he was under the influence had just happened, the result of some unfulfilled love and need that had suddenly taken over her common sense.
No! She could never try to find him now. However remote her chance of success might be, she couldn’t face him again. She couldn’t face herself.
You called Paul a coward, but you’re the coward.
Pressing her foot to the accelerator, she headed up the on-ramp to the freeway, desperately in need of speed to help her outrun her memories. But once trapped in the afternoon traffic, speed eluded her, and her jumbled thoughts and fears surged to the forefront of her brain.
The soft touch of his kisses, his sinewy limbs surrounding her, the sweet thrill of his uneven breaths feathering her skin, the strength of his possession…to this day the recollections made her shudder and squirm with humiliation, although another part of herself was still so very susceptible! She hated thinking about their night together, yet it crept into her dreams even to this day. She wished she could forget the feel of his strong body pressed against her softer form, his lips possessively demanding her response, her own body eagerly responding.
Unbidden, a squeak of protest rose to her lips. She shook herself to get rid of the feelings, wishing she were free of the past.
And though she should be glad that he’d been dead drunk at the time and probably didn’t remember a thing, she still couldn’t help wishing he’d been sober enough to realize what he was doing. Maybe then he would not have reached for her, and maybe then she would have been able to resist…
She hadn’t been in contact with Tyler since that night, and though she’d wondered about his later disappearance, she’d been aware Tyler had been suffering some kind of major emotional trauma the night she’d slept with him. He’d been distraught and seeking comfortand she’d been there. It was just too bad she hadn’t relied on her normal common sense and had succumbed instead to hot desire.
Ah, well, Cammie thought resignedly. Such were the mistakes nightmares were made of.
How did Paul expect her to find Tyler anyway? There was no doubt in Cammie’s mind that Tyler’s overbearing, egocentric father, Samuel Stovall, had raised heaven and earth looking for him. Why hadn’t Paul contacted the great Samuel Stovall himself?
Wrinkling her nose in distaste, Cammie considered the Hollywood legend who’d sired Tyler. Sam Stovall was still a recognized leading man, though with the meteoric rise of Tyler’s fame, his had certainly taken a backseat. And though it was true that Samuel’s A-List stature had slipped a few degrees after Tyler’s disappearance, he still was a fairly weighty name in town. He would certainly have a better chance and more resources for finding his son.
Maybe he even knew where Tyler was.
Cammie had lost contact with both Tyler and Sam when Sam divorced her mother. Samuel had moved on to a new wifehis fourth at last countand Cammie’s mother had slipped into deep depression, followed by a losing battle with cancer. Cammie, who’d never much liked her adulterous stepfather in the first place, Hollywood legend or no, blamed Samuel for contributing to her mother’s death. Unwarranted, perhaps, but it was how she’d always felt, and she had been unable to ever completely recognize his innocence in the matter.
Tyler, on the other hand, held her heart within his grasphad he but known it. Cammie dreamed of him long after he was a forgotten part of her life, and when she married Paul, it was simply as a substitute for the man who’d disappeared from her life and the world at large.
Oh, she hadn’t known it at the time, of course. She’d made herself believe she loved Paul. Twenty-four years old with no family to rely on, the young Cammie had been entranced by Paul’s quick wit and good looks. Paul had found Cammie at an audition and had promptly fallen in love. At least that’s what he told her, and what she’d once believed. And when he met Cammie’s mother, Claire, just before her death, he professed himself in love all over again. He flattered Claire, who responded like a wilted flower to water. When Paul asked Cammie to marry him, Claire clasped her daughter’s hands within her own and begged her to say yes.
It was one of those moments etched in Cammie’s memory. Her mother’s dark blue eyes full of hope as she stared at her uncertain daughter. “Cammie, it’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance. This man loves you. Don’t marry someone who doesn’t love you. Paul is right for you, I can feel it. Do you feel it?”
“Y-y-ess,” Cammie struggled. She felt something. Was it love? She really hoped so.
“Marry him. Please.”
If Cammie had known then how truly ill her mother was at that point, she might have hesitated, might have realized that Claire’s desire for her daughter’s marriage was based on her own need as a mother to have everything tied up neatly and done with before she died.
But she hadn’t known. Nor had she realized her mother was truly on her deathbed. Though cancer had spread throughout her body, Claire’s beauty remained, fooling Cammie into believing her mother’s immortality.
“Are you going to marry Paul?” Claire beseeched her daughter, a now constant litany.
“Yes,” Cammie told her.
“Good…” Claire’s lashes fluttered. “I haven’t made a mistake, have I? About Paul? You do love him, don’t you?”
Cammie couldn’t bear to air her own fears. She simply swallowed and nodded.
“You’ll do fine. You’re stronger than I am.”
“Mom, please…” Cammie squeezed her mother’s hand, sensing she was struggling hard.
“I’ll tell you a secret.” Her voice lowered. “I only loved one man, but he’s a cheat. Sam…”
“Mom, don’t”
“No, listen. Listen…” She took several shallow, unsteady breaths. “I didn’t understand when I was your age. Family’s the most important thing. I thought love was everything. Romance, you know. But it turned out I just loved illusions. Your father never wanted to marry me, and he left us both, but Sam…”
“I know, I know. It’s okay,” Cammie assured her. “When you’re better, we’ll plan a wedding.”
“Don’t wait too long.”
“I won’t.” Cammie just wanted to change the subject.
“Family is everything. It’s all we have, in the end. And you need to have a baby, Camilla. Someone to love.” She relaxed her grip on Cammie’s hands, falling into a troubled sleep.
Three days later, she simply didn’t wake up and suddenly Cammie was standing at her gravesite, Paul by her side, wondering what to do. Her mother’s death filled her with enormous grief. Claire had been Cammie’s only true family and it seemed impossible that she was gone forever.
And it hadn’t helped that Sam Stovall appeared at the ceremony. He murmured condolences, but Cammie couldn’t look at him. Maybe her anger and blame were misguided. She didn’t care. It just hurt too much. Tyler was already long gone. He’d disappeared soon after Cammie’s night with him, and no one knew how to reach him.
Cammie married Paul soon afterward, abiding by her pledge to her mother. Then ironically, within the first few months of her marriage, she learned she was pregnantClaire’s other wish for her. Cammie had barely adjusted to the news when she miscarried. In those sad hours that followed, while she coped with this next unexpected loss, she learned another unpalatable truth: Paul might have professed his love for her, but he truly only cared about himself. He couldn’t understand Cammie’s melancholia.
“We’ll have another kid. Better later anyway,” he told her, checking his watch as if every moment counted in his busy, busy life. His impatience made her cover up her misery, and she pretended that it didn’t matter.
But she learned that ambition was his true mistress; Cammie didn’t even run a close second. She miscarried again, and Paul shrugged it off. Then, a few years later, she miscarried once more, and Paul grew even more callous and less empathetic, if that were possible. He couldn’t understand her feelings, labeling them as some kind of weird “female phobia.”
That’s when she left him and focused on her career.
She was happier without Paul. She struggled, waiting tables and heading for audition after audition. She thought of Tyler often, wondering where he was, how he was, and though she believed Sam might know, she would rather walk on hot coals than contact him.
She was running out of money, literally scraping pennies to make enough for rent, when she got her break: Cherry Blossom Lane was looking for a new character, Donna Jenkins, whose road to true love would be a rocky one, to say the least. Cammie beat out a slew of other would-be Donnas, her own pain in the romance department so real and raw that it translated onto her screen test. They loved her. They hired her, and she spent a blissful three seasons with the nighttime drama, thinking her luck had finally changed. Even with Paul on board, she seemed secure in her position. Now, of course, that was over.
Family…the only thing of value.
Her mother’s words floated across her conscience again, almost forgotten until this moment of introspective pain.
Family…
Signaling for the next off-ramp, she considered her life to date, realizing with a sad smile that she wished she’d gotten pregnant all those years ago when she and Tyler Stovall had made love.
He awakened with a jerk, nearly rolling off the narrow couch onto the stone floor. In the semidarkness, he blinked, trying to orient himself. Across the room the television flickered noiselessly, an anomaly of the electronic age set in the fir and river rock wall of shelves that marched up the west end of the cabin. Squinting at the late-night host, Tyler Stovall blindly reached a hand for the remote control, sending magazines and papers flying in his search. Swearing good-naturedly, he finally discovered the rectangular object, clicking off the familiar face on the screen. Yawning, he stretched, and vaguely remembered the uneasy dream he’d been having. Cammie Pendleton.
Without a stitch on.
Ty shook his head in a mixture of disgust and amazement. What time was it? Ten o’clock? Eleven? He’d come in from chopping wood as the light was fading and had simply flopped down on the couch to relax before dinner. Well, he’d relaxed himself right through to bedtime, it appeared, although now he didn’t feel the least bit sleepy.
Scratching his beard, he grimaced, pulling at some of the stiff, curling hairs. He needed a serious shave. He looked a bit like the hermit he was, and even his hair was too long, brushing the back of his collar and then some.
Frowning, he rolled to his feet, wondering where that thought had come from. His appearance had scarcely changed in ten years. In this Canadian border town, the locals simply knew him as Jerry, and for as long as they could remember, he’d looked just the same.
And he’d liked it that way. Tyler Stovall was dead and buried, as far as he was concerned; he was Jerry Mercer, no one else.
Still, he felt restless, and muttering an oath no one else co. . .
But the truth was, Paul Merrill stood right in front of her, arms folded over his chest, ankles negligently crossed in front of him as he leaned against the edge of his desk. It was a pose meant to relax her, but Cammie knew better than to let down her guard in front of him. She’d had four years of marriage to learn the true merit of the man, and she knew his summoning her today did not bode well.
“Sit down, Camilla,” he urged, extending an arm toward one of the club chairs nestled against the wall.
“Thanks, I’d rather stand.”
His lips tightened briefly, then he shrugged. “You know the show’s going in a new direction,” he began. “We’re trimming a few of the lesser characters and focusing on the original cast. They’re the lifeblood of Cherry Blossom Lane, and let’s face it, Donna Jenkins isn’t one of them.”
Cammie met his gaze, desperately trying to get her suddenly banging heart to slow down. She didn’t want to feel this way. She didn’t want Paul to know how much he was devastating her. “I got you this job,” she reminded him quietly. “And now you’re firing me?”
The tips of his ears reddened. “It’s not up to me! Donna Jenkins has been around for three seasons already, and frankly, she’s about used up. Maybe if you’d created a more memorable character, things would have been different.”
Cammie’s lips parted in anger and disbelief. Before she could respond, however, Paul hurriedly jumped in again. “I know you tried hard. It just didn’t work.”
She regarded him coolly. Didn’t work? He knew, as well as she did, that she’d taken a walk-on part and turned it into a living, breathing woman who’d touched the hearts and minds of a sympathetic public. Donna Jenkins, her role on the nighttime drama, Cherry Blossom Lane, was a woman whose search for love had invariably led her into the arms of the wrong men, men who used her as a stepping-stone for their own ambitions. As a parallel for her own life, it couldn’t be more accurate.
“Now, I know what you’re thinking,” Paul said, spreading his hands. “But I had nothing to do with this. Everyone loves you here, but in a few weeks, when we film the finale, Donna Jenkins is kaput.”
“All right.”
His brows lifted in surprise. He did not expect her capitulation. “That’s it?”
“What do you want me to do, Paul? Beg you to keep me on?”
“Come on, Camilla, relax. Don’t be that way.”
“What way?” Cammie was too upset to meekly turn tail and run.
“I know you didn’t want me here,” he sputtered. “I know you’re thinking I’m behind this. But you know, it wasn’t entirely because of your famous family that I landed this job. People know me in this town. I’ve got a reputation.”
Cammie almost laughed aloud. She’d reluctantly helped him get hired on Cherry Blossom Lane only because he’d begged and pleaded and threatened her during the whole course of their marriage. But power was an addiction for Paul, and as soon as he was on staff, he set out to worm his way up the executive ladder. He’d succeeded, too, and had risen from minor underling to co-executive producer in less than three years.
But regardless of his assertion that she belonged to a “famous” family, she’d won her role by sheer talent and determination. Her famous family was really her stepfamily, and for reasons she didn’t like dwelling on, she was no longer in contact with any of them. Just thinking about them sent a frisson of discomfort down her spine.
With an effort, she pushed those thoughts aside and kept her focus on her ex-husband. “Well, I guess that’s all we have to say to each other.”
“I may not be long with the show, either, as it happens,” Paul said a bit reflectively.
“Hmmm.” His future didn’t really interest her.
Or so she thought, until he added, “I’ve been talking to some of the right people, and the Connellys have asked me to come on board.”
The Connellys? Cammie’s jaw nearly dropped, but before her shock could register, she gritted her teeth together and let her face register only mild interest. The Connellys were one of the hottest production teams going in Hollywood these days. If Paul were actually telling the truth…
Suddenly Cammie was angry, really angry. It wasn’t fair that he’d up and decided to get rid of her. And then to brag about his own continued success! It was unconscionable.
“You’re a real piece of work, Paul Merrill,” she told him flatly. “You make certain I’m fired, then you have the audacity to tell me that you’ve got a better job on the line. Well, if you think I’m going to congratulate you, you’re mistaken.”
“Look, I’ve got other issues here, Camilla,” he declared. “Don’t insult me.”
“Other issues!” she sputtered. “You took my job from me, and you know it. Worse yet, you don’t even care.”
“It’s not like that. Justrelax.”
“Stop telling me to relax, and stop calling me Camilla. You know I hate it.”
His sigh was long-suffering, as if she were just too, too impossible to deal with. “You’re always jumping to conclusions.”
“Oh, am I? You mean, you didn’t just fire me?”
“That’s not the issue I wanted to talk to you about today.”
She shook her head in utter disbelief. “Are you kidding? Forgive me, Paul, but it’s all that’s on my mind!”
“Come on, give me a chance to explain,” he demanded crossly.
“Like you’ve given me such a chance?” she responded, her voice filled with sad irony.
That, at least, seemed to penetrate. Paul looked away for a moment, but he recovered with more speed than the situation warranted. Throwing her a quick, assessing look she couldn’t quite read, he revealed, “I’ve got something else in mind for you.”
“Oh, thanks very much.”
“No, this is good. Great, actually.” He pinched his lower lip together with his thumb and forefinger, a habit denoting intense concentration.
Still reeling from his earlier news, she shook her head. She didn’t want to hear any more.
“Believe me, your part was written out on Cherry Blossom without any influence from me. The show’s got a bold new direction. You’ve been scheduled to the at the season finale for a long time.”
Cammie refused to acknowledge that she’d heard rumors to that effect. Rumors abounded on the set. There was a certain paranoia about being “let go” at all times in an industry where one pretty face could be substituted so easily for another.
“Well, it’s fact,” Paul said into the silence. He gave her another look as he dropped into his desk chair, propping his ankles on the polished mahogany finish as if it were a secondhand reject. “Okay, I pushed the powers-that-be and had you bumped out a little sooner than originally scheduled. No big deal. And it leaves you free to try other things.”
“Don’t do me any favors, Paul!”
“The finale’s fabulous. Judith and Becca are both accused of your murder. It’s going to be fabulous. The ratings will soar!” His eyes actually misted over. Paul Merrill was ready to swoon with delight.
“I’m happy for you,” Cammie murmured sardonically.
“Don’t get snippy. I told you I’ve got something for you, and I do. It’s big.” He slid her a sideways smile. His expression warred between excitement and a certain hesitancy, as if he knew his pending news wasn’t as wonderful as he would like her to believe.
Cammie braced herself. “What is it?” she asked, certain the other shoe was about to drop.
“Just a film role, that’s all.”
“Oh, sure.”
“A co-starring role.”
“Paul…” she warned. She’d heard that line a million times before. Half the time “co-star” meant minor character left on the cutting-room floor.
He waved her skepticism aside. “This is the opportunity of a lifetime!”
Cammie couldn’t believe his theatrics. Around the set she and Paul had made a practice of ignoring each other, elevating it to near art form, and suddenly here they were, talking as if they were almost friends. She knew better than to trust him. She’d been down that road before.
“Paulthat you can get me fired, then try and make me believe you’ve done me a favor!” Cammie inhaled deeply. “Words truly fail me.”
“You’re not listening. I’ve got you a film, for God’s sake. That’s what I was talking to the Connellys about! Summer Solstice Productions, Camilla! Do you hear me?”
“Summer Solstice?” Cammie repeated blankly. Summer Solstice was the name of James and Nora Connelly’s production company, and its string of successes was already legendary.
“Production starts next fall. This property’s red hot and ready to roll. And they want you!” he finished triumphantly, holding his arms out as if she should want to jump into them.
Cammie didn’t know what to think. She was still furious with him, but he seemed completely serious. A Summer Solstice film? Unbelievable. James and Nora Connelly were a young husband and wife team whose string of modest successes and last winter’s huge blockbuster film had shot them from obscurity to fame and fortune. They were the newest rage. Hollywood’s current golden couple. Everyone who was anybody tried to curry their favors.
Cammie didn’t believe Paul. She couldn’t. “They want me to screen test,” she corrected. “I’ve got an audition, not a part.”
“No, they want you.” He dropped his feet to the floor and leaned over the desk.
“What’s the catch?”
“You hurt me, Cammie. You really do.”
“You just fired me, Paul,” she pointed out sardonically. “Who’s hurt whom?”
“Oh, Cammie…” Paul sighed hugely and shook his head, but Cammie held firm. The way he was acting told her there was more going on here than met the eye, but to rail further against his letting her go wouldn’t accomplish anything. Moreover, she sensed that it was water under the bridge. Paul and Cherry Blossom Lane were the past and had been for a while, it appeared, even though she’d been the last to know.
“All right, I’ll bite. So, what’s this fabulous role?” she asked into the gathering silence.
“Well…” He steepled his fingers together on the desk, staring at them as if they held all of life’s mysteries within their grasp. Cammie suspected he was searching for the right way to lure her into the trap. “You’re being considered for the female lead in a romantic drama.”
Cammie didn’t move a muscle. She was certain she was dreaming. The female lead? Impossible! Supporting role, maybe. But even that was an outside chance at best.
When she didn’t comment, Paul clucked his tongue. “Here, you think the worst of me, but who do you think it was that talked Nora and Jim into using you? Who do you think that was, huh? Yours truly. Good old Paul. That’s who got you the audition.”
“Audition,” she repeated, catching him out. Her hopes sank and she dared to breathe again. She’d been right. An audition meant you were in a cattle call with about ten thousand other hopefuls.
Paul waved that aside. “Aren’t you listening? Right now you’re their first choice.”
“No.”
“Yes!”
“How?” she blurted out, furious with herself for the rising hope she couldn’t quite tamp down. If she didn’t watch out, it would suffocate her. “How can I be their first choice? They don’t even know me! No one knows me outside of television! How would James and Nora Connelly even consider a nobody like me? You’re lying to me.”
“I am not! You’ve got an audition on Friday. Because of me,” he reminded her tightly. “And a lot of thanks I get.”
“Paul!” Cammie shook her head.
“The role’s tailor made for you. Young woman trying to make it in the world meets guy, falls in love, gets pregnant, guy leaves her, she has the baby, then they get together in the end.”
“Now, there’s an original plot.”
“That’s just your part. The basic story is about a guy who loses everything to greed, then fights his way back to the top, redeeming himself along the way.”
“Are you for real, Paul?”
“Why do you doubt me so much? Here…”
He reached into a drawer and sailed a copy of a screenplay across his desk. It slipped over the edge and fluttered to the floor. Cammie picked it up.
“Rock Bottom,” she murmured, checking out the title.
“Read it tonight. It’s good.”
That little light of hope still flickered somewhere inside her; she just couldn’t quite extinguish it. Sighing, Cammie gave in. “What are you up to, Paul? Do I have to strip naked and mud wrestle or something? No, I don’t want to know.” She held up her hand as he started to answer. “Whatever it is, it’s no good. I’m not gullible anymore, Paul.”
“Read the damn screenplay! See for yourself.”
“I will read it.”
“Good.”
“Good,” she repeated tersely, staring at him.
Silence stretched between them. She watched Paul pinch his lower lip once again.
“You’re working yourself up to tell me something more,” Cammie guessed.
“There is something…” he admitted, grimacing a bit.
Cammie, who’d perched on the edge of her chair to collect the screenplay, now flopped back into the chair. “I don’t want to hear it!”
“Now, don’t get all huffy.”
She simply snorted her disgust, crossed her arms over her chest and tried to forget how much of a worm Paul Merrill was. What a jerk! He loved raising her hopes just to crush them back down.
“It’s not that bad. You don’t have to do anything on camera you might object to, within reason, of course. Nora and James just want you to help sign your co-star.”
“What does that mean?” she asked cautiously.
“They’re having a little get-together Friday night. At their house in Brentwood. We could go.”
Cammie stared. Things were moving way too fast. Was there any chance Paul was on the level? Summer Solstice wanted her? As far as she knew, the Connellys only chose from Hollywood’s A-List of starswhich Cammie definitely was not on.
Did I say A-List? I’m not even in the same alphabet!
“Cammie?”
With an effort she shook herself out of her reverie. “Help sign my co-star?” she asked, remembering the request tagged on to this startling bit of news. “I don’t understand. I don’t have any clout with anyone.”
“Well, that’s not quite true.”
“Who?” But before her lips could change from the “o” of her question, the answer sizzled across her brain: the Stovalls. Her famous stepfamily.
“If they want Samuel Stovall, they can certainly pick up the phone themselves,” Cammie stated tightly, referring to her ex-stepfather. Samuel was a Hollywood icon, and one of the most selfish men Cammie ever had the misfortune to meet.
“It’s not Samuel they want,” Paul said slowly, his eyes closely watching her face.
Cammie sat perfectly still; her brain strangely frozen. Some part of her had known this was where Paul had been headed from the moment he’d brought up her connection to the Stovalls. There was another actor in the Stovall family, and it was thinking of him that made Cammie squirm and feel heat invade her cheeks.
“No,” she said in a low voice.
Paul nodded solemnly.
“No…” she whispered again, not believing what had to be true.
“Tyler Stovall,” he said aloud.
Tyler Stovall…Hearing his name again after all these years had the power to turn Cammie’s insides to liquid. He was her worst mistakemore dire than the one she’d made by marrying Pauland the thought of him still held so much power that for a moment Cammie couldn’t speak. Finding her voice with an effort, she said, “He’s been missing for ten years.”
“You can find him,” he said with certainty.
Cammie’s aqua eyes gazed at him in disbelief. “Are you crazy? Tyler Stovall? Was this your idea? For God’s sake, Paul. You’re unbelievable!”
“It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Not that big of a deal!”
“You know him,” Paul pointed out tautly. “Better than anyone.”
“Not true! I haven’t been close to him in yearseven before he disappeared. You know that! For heaven’s sake, no one’s sure if he’s even alive!”
“Oh, he’s alive.”
“How do you know?”
“It stands to reason. If he were dead, the whole world would know it. That kind of news travels like lightning. No, he’s hiding out somewhere. Cammie, it’s Paul you’re talking to, remember? We’ve discussed this. You and I both know that, for whatever reason, he packed it in, left Hollywood and chose to live the life of a recluse in some podunk part of the world where no one can recognize him. But whatever sent him away is long over now,” Paul rationalized. “It’s time he came back.”
“Easy for you to say, Paul! We don’t know what happened to him. No one does but Tyler!”
“Look, I’m just being realistic. Nora and James want Tyler for this picture. It would be a great comeback film for him. They’re willing to use you if you can get him.”
“Otherwise, any number of starlets will do,” she stated with a certain amount of bitterness.
He spread his hands. “I didn’t make the rules in this town.”
“No, but you sure know how to play by them!”
“Camilla, come on. You can reach him. I know you can.”
“I don’t have any idea where he is!”
Paul made a face, as if Tyler Stovall’s disappearance had been perpetrated just to annoy him personally. “No one does. The guy’s a damn ghost. But you could find out. His family would talk to you. Hell, they’re your family, too.”
“Not anymore!”
“Well, they were once. Come on, Cammie. You know what I’m saying. This could be the biggest thing you’ll ever see.”
Her legs shaking from outrage, Cammie strode over to the desk, glaring down at her ex-husband. He straightened in his chair and smoothed back his thinning hair. He’d once been very good-looking, but now he sported that wellfed, too-many-steaks-and-martinis look, and his natural appeal had all but vanished. She wondered anew what she’d ever seen in him. “I won’t do it.”
“You’re slitting your own throat.”
“My prerogative.”
“Look, somebody’s going to find him. If you don’t do it, someone else will. Nora and James really want him, and they’re willing to pay a lot. Someone with less scruples than yourself will get the job done, and your role will go to an actress with less credentials and talent, but who’ll play the game. That’s the way it always is.”
“Your cynicism has rotted your soul, Paul.”
He half-laughed. “I don’t have a soul left, Cammie. I sold it years ago. You should take a lesson.”
“I’d rather the a painful, humiliating, grisly death.”
“That’s what the death of your career will feel like.”
“Go to hell, Paul.” She strode toward the door, feeling slightly sick and definitely depressed.
“Think about it, Cammie. Friday night. At the Connellys’ Brentwood home.”
She glanced back, so infuriated she could hardly see. And the worst of it was that Paul was right! Just because she possessed more morals and ethics than most of the dwellers around these parts didn’t mean it would turn her into a success. And that made her all the angrier. She wanted to call him filthy, low-down dirty names, and when he lifted his brows in challenge, she had to fight down the bile bubbling in the back of her throat.
“Fate is a man,” she muttered through clenched teeth, and was gratified at least to witness his look of total incomprehension before she slammed the door to his office behind her, closing his wretched visage from her sight.
Maybe it was because she never spoke of it. Maybe it was because Tyler’s father, Samuel Stovall, had been married so many times that some of his ex-wives, and certainly his ex-stepdaughters, were forgotten memories. Or maybe it was because Tyler had been gone for so many years and that she, Cammie, refused to think about him.
Or maybe it was remembering how close they’d once been…
Shivering in the bright L.A. sunshine, Cammie climbed into her blue BMW and headed outside the studio, waving to the guard at the gate for one of the last times. With a pang, she thought about the job on Cherry Blossom Lane that was about to end. A new chapter of her life was beginning.
Tyler Stovall…
Waiting at a red light, Cammie closed her eyes for a moment. Thinking about him wouldn’t do. Not now. Not ever. She wanted her association with the Stovalls to be a forgotten memory in this community. It was just too bad Paul knew so much about her history.
But he didn’t know about Tyler and her. Not all of it. Tyler, himself, might not remember that last fateful night they’d shared together, for he’d been too unhappy, too destroyed, and too drunk for it to be a complete memory.
At least that’s what she told herself.
Oh, Cammie, she thought for about the billionth time. How could you have?
Punching out a number on her cellular phone, Cammie weaved her way toward the Hollywood Freeway. Teri, the receptionist for her agent, Susannah Coburn, put her on hold without checking who was on the line. Knowing how busy Susannah could be, Cammie hung up. She would call Susannah later. Right now, she just wanted to get home.
Tyler Stovall…
She’d adored him as a teenager, and when he’d gone on to megafame, becoming an icon in the acting profession in six short years, she’d nearly fallen into a coma of delight. All those other girls might salivate over him, but Tyler was her big brother.
Sort of.
Tyler, for mysterious reasons no one seemed to understand, had disappeared ten years earlier. There was speculation he was dead, ill, or dying. People thought he’d run off with some woman he didn’t want the press to know about. While a Hollywood celebrity, he’d been hounded by paparazzi in the usual fashion and had been known to politely, but firmly, run them off his property. Once, if one could believe everything they read, he’d actually come at a trespasser while riding on his lawn mower. Tyler had simply pushed the man and his invasive camera into the water of a pond located on his property. Incensed, the interloper had sued himand lost. He had been trespassing, after all, and no one looked favorably on the viciousness of celebrity stalkers in the first place.
Glancing in the rearview mirror, Cammie encountered her own blue-green, anxious eyes. That anxiety was for a lot of reasons, not least the matter of her one night with Tyler. She’d never forgotten him; he probably didn’t remember. But if she should encounter him again…then, what? How could she ever explain that sleeping with him while he was under the influence had just happened, the result of some unfulfilled love and need that had suddenly taken over her common sense.
No! She could never try to find him now. However remote her chance of success might be, she couldn’t face him again. She couldn’t face herself.
You called Paul a coward, but you’re the coward.
Pressing her foot to the accelerator, she headed up the on-ramp to the freeway, desperately in need of speed to help her outrun her memories. But once trapped in the afternoon traffic, speed eluded her, and her jumbled thoughts and fears surged to the forefront of her brain.
The soft touch of his kisses, his sinewy limbs surrounding her, the sweet thrill of his uneven breaths feathering her skin, the strength of his possession…to this day the recollections made her shudder and squirm with humiliation, although another part of herself was still so very susceptible! She hated thinking about their night together, yet it crept into her dreams even to this day. She wished she could forget the feel of his strong body pressed against her softer form, his lips possessively demanding her response, her own body eagerly responding.
Unbidden, a squeak of protest rose to her lips. She shook herself to get rid of the feelings, wishing she were free of the past.
And though she should be glad that he’d been dead drunk at the time and probably didn’t remember a thing, she still couldn’t help wishing he’d been sober enough to realize what he was doing. Maybe then he would not have reached for her, and maybe then she would have been able to resist…
She hadn’t been in contact with Tyler since that night, and though she’d wondered about his later disappearance, she’d been aware Tyler had been suffering some kind of major emotional trauma the night she’d slept with him. He’d been distraught and seeking comfortand she’d been there. It was just too bad she hadn’t relied on her normal common sense and had succumbed instead to hot desire.
Ah, well, Cammie thought resignedly. Such were the mistakes nightmares were made of.
How did Paul expect her to find Tyler anyway? There was no doubt in Cammie’s mind that Tyler’s overbearing, egocentric father, Samuel Stovall, had raised heaven and earth looking for him. Why hadn’t Paul contacted the great Samuel Stovall himself?
Wrinkling her nose in distaste, Cammie considered the Hollywood legend who’d sired Tyler. Sam Stovall was still a recognized leading man, though with the meteoric rise of Tyler’s fame, his had certainly taken a backseat. And though it was true that Samuel’s A-List stature had slipped a few degrees after Tyler’s disappearance, he still was a fairly weighty name in town. He would certainly have a better chance and more resources for finding his son.
Maybe he even knew where Tyler was.
Cammie had lost contact with both Tyler and Sam when Sam divorced her mother. Samuel had moved on to a new wifehis fourth at last countand Cammie’s mother had slipped into deep depression, followed by a losing battle with cancer. Cammie, who’d never much liked her adulterous stepfather in the first place, Hollywood legend or no, blamed Samuel for contributing to her mother’s death. Unwarranted, perhaps, but it was how she’d always felt, and she had been unable to ever completely recognize his innocence in the matter.
Tyler, on the other hand, held her heart within his grasphad he but known it. Cammie dreamed of him long after he was a forgotten part of her life, and when she married Paul, it was simply as a substitute for the man who’d disappeared from her life and the world at large.
Oh, she hadn’t known it at the time, of course. She’d made herself believe she loved Paul. Twenty-four years old with no family to rely on, the young Cammie had been entranced by Paul’s quick wit and good looks. Paul had found Cammie at an audition and had promptly fallen in love. At least that’s what he told her, and what she’d once believed. And when he met Cammie’s mother, Claire, just before her death, he professed himself in love all over again. He flattered Claire, who responded like a wilted flower to water. When Paul asked Cammie to marry him, Claire clasped her daughter’s hands within her own and begged her to say yes.
It was one of those moments etched in Cammie’s memory. Her mother’s dark blue eyes full of hope as she stared at her uncertain daughter. “Cammie, it’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance. This man loves you. Don’t marry someone who doesn’t love you. Paul is right for you, I can feel it. Do you feel it?”
“Y-y-ess,” Cammie struggled. She felt something. Was it love? She really hoped so.
“Marry him. Please.”
If Cammie had known then how truly ill her mother was at that point, she might have hesitated, might have realized that Claire’s desire for her daughter’s marriage was based on her own need as a mother to have everything tied up neatly and done with before she died.
But she hadn’t known. Nor had she realized her mother was truly on her deathbed. Though cancer had spread throughout her body, Claire’s beauty remained, fooling Cammie into believing her mother’s immortality.
“Are you going to marry Paul?” Claire beseeched her daughter, a now constant litany.
“Yes,” Cammie told her.
“Good…” Claire’s lashes fluttered. “I haven’t made a mistake, have I? About Paul? You do love him, don’t you?”
Cammie couldn’t bear to air her own fears. She simply swallowed and nodded.
“You’ll do fine. You’re stronger than I am.”
“Mom, please…” Cammie squeezed her mother’s hand, sensing she was struggling hard.
“I’ll tell you a secret.” Her voice lowered. “I only loved one man, but he’s a cheat. Sam…”
“Mom, don’t”
“No, listen. Listen…” She took several shallow, unsteady breaths. “I didn’t understand when I was your age. Family’s the most important thing. I thought love was everything. Romance, you know. But it turned out I just loved illusions. Your father never wanted to marry me, and he left us both, but Sam…”
“I know, I know. It’s okay,” Cammie assured her. “When you’re better, we’ll plan a wedding.”
“Don’t wait too long.”
“I won’t.” Cammie just wanted to change the subject.
“Family is everything. It’s all we have, in the end. And you need to have a baby, Camilla. Someone to love.” She relaxed her grip on Cammie’s hands, falling into a troubled sleep.
Three days later, she simply didn’t wake up and suddenly Cammie was standing at her gravesite, Paul by her side, wondering what to do. Her mother’s death filled her with enormous grief. Claire had been Cammie’s only true family and it seemed impossible that she was gone forever.
And it hadn’t helped that Sam Stovall appeared at the ceremony. He murmured condolences, but Cammie couldn’t look at him. Maybe her anger and blame were misguided. She didn’t care. It just hurt too much. Tyler was already long gone. He’d disappeared soon after Cammie’s night with him, and no one knew how to reach him.
Cammie married Paul soon afterward, abiding by her pledge to her mother. Then ironically, within the first few months of her marriage, she learned she was pregnantClaire’s other wish for her. Cammie had barely adjusted to the news when she miscarried. In those sad hours that followed, while she coped with this next unexpected loss, she learned another unpalatable truth: Paul might have professed his love for her, but he truly only cared about himself. He couldn’t understand Cammie’s melancholia.
“We’ll have another kid. Better later anyway,” he told her, checking his watch as if every moment counted in his busy, busy life. His impatience made her cover up her misery, and she pretended that it didn’t matter.
But she learned that ambition was his true mistress; Cammie didn’t even run a close second. She miscarried again, and Paul shrugged it off. Then, a few years later, she miscarried once more, and Paul grew even more callous and less empathetic, if that were possible. He couldn’t understand her feelings, labeling them as some kind of weird “female phobia.”
That’s when she left him and focused on her career.
She was happier without Paul. She struggled, waiting tables and heading for audition after audition. She thought of Tyler often, wondering where he was, how he was, and though she believed Sam might know, she would rather walk on hot coals than contact him.
She was running out of money, literally scraping pennies to make enough for rent, when she got her break: Cherry Blossom Lane was looking for a new character, Donna Jenkins, whose road to true love would be a rocky one, to say the least. Cammie beat out a slew of other would-be Donnas, her own pain in the romance department so real and raw that it translated onto her screen test. They loved her. They hired her, and she spent a blissful three seasons with the nighttime drama, thinking her luck had finally changed. Even with Paul on board, she seemed secure in her position. Now, of course, that was over.
Family…the only thing of value.
Her mother’s words floated across her conscience again, almost forgotten until this moment of introspective pain.
Family…
Signaling for the next off-ramp, she considered her life to date, realizing with a sad smile that she wished she’d gotten pregnant all those years ago when she and Tyler Stovall had made love.
He awakened with a jerk, nearly rolling off the narrow couch onto the stone floor. In the semidarkness, he blinked, trying to orient himself. Across the room the television flickered noiselessly, an anomaly of the electronic age set in the fir and river rock wall of shelves that marched up the west end of the cabin. Squinting at the late-night host, Tyler Stovall blindly reached a hand for the remote control, sending magazines and papers flying in his search. Swearing good-naturedly, he finally discovered the rectangular object, clicking off the familiar face on the screen. Yawning, he stretched, and vaguely remembered the uneasy dream he’d been having. Cammie Pendleton.
Without a stitch on.
Ty shook his head in a mixture of disgust and amazement. What time was it? Ten o’clock? Eleven? He’d come in from chopping wood as the light was fading and had simply flopped down on the couch to relax before dinner. Well, he’d relaxed himself right through to bedtime, it appeared, although now he didn’t feel the least bit sleepy.
Scratching his beard, he grimaced, pulling at some of the stiff, curling hairs. He needed a serious shave. He looked a bit like the hermit he was, and even his hair was too long, brushing the back of his collar and then some.
Frowning, he rolled to his feet, wondering where that thought had come from. His appearance had scarcely changed in ten years. In this Canadian border town, the locals simply knew him as Jerry, and for as long as they could remember, he’d looked just the same.
And he’d liked it that way. Tyler Stovall was dead and buried, as far as he was concerned; he was Jerry Mercer, no one else.
Still, he felt restless, and muttering an oath no one else co. . .
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