'A Quantick quiz is always an unmissable occasion. Funny and fantastical, brilliant, brain-bending and unutterably bonkers. Quantick is the Captain Beefheart of quizzing' MARK BILLINGHAM
'Quantick's Quite Difficult Quiz Book is the antidote to every deathly dull pub quiz you've ever been to. This is how a quiz book should be written - where having fun is the most important outcome' GARY WIGGLESWORTH, author of The Book Lover's Quiz Book Distinctive, unusual, difficult, but spectacularly entertaining, this quiz book is to other pub quizzes what Trivial Pursuit was to Ludo, what TheHitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy is like to the Rhyl phone directory, and what the Rolls-Royce Silver Ghost is like compared to a kid's scooter. Loads better.
David Quantick works regularly with Armando Iannucci, including on the new HBO series, Avenue 5. He won an Emmy as part of the writing team on Veep, a BAFTA for Harry Hill's TV Burp and a Writers' Guild Award for The Thick of It. For over fifteen years, David has also hosted his own very popular quizzes at festivals, events, pubs, clubs, cinemas and in tents: the quizzes range is broad and the questions are tricky. They're not about statistics, there's no sport, the picture rounds are conceptual, and there's sometimes a round called 'Martin Amis Character or Blur Song'. Each quiz is funny and entertaining even if you don't know the answers. The quizzes are informative and opinionated. In some ways, they're like stand-up with questions. This is a book based on David's excellent live quizzes.
David Quantick is a novelist (All My Colours, Night Train), broadcaster (Radio 2's The Blagger's Guide, Front Row, Loose Ends), music journalist (NME, Q, Uncut) and comedy writer, who hosts quizzes in his spare time. For years, David's quizzes have attracted paying customers who like to be enraged and entertained by quizzes described by many people as 'quite difficult'.
But they are quizzes. Quite difficult quizzes that tax the brain and make it go in directions it didn't know it could. That's not to say the questions are fiendishly scientific and packed with questions about dates and the periodic table. They're about books and music, movies and actors, strange events and interesting quotes. You don't leave a Quantick quiz knowing how many times Spurs have won the League, but you may know how many Shirleys have sung a Bond theme or how George V made the front page of The Times.
The effectiveness of David's quizzes is down to their unusual variety and almost stream-of-consciousness leaps and bounds of factual imagination. There's not even much point in cheating, because the answers often require mental agility as well as just knowing where Calais is (it's in France, but it wasn't always, even when it was).
David's quiz book includes twenty-five main quizzes, four Christmas quizzes and four specialist quizzes, so thirty-three quizzes in total. Entertaining in its own right, this is also a conceptual yet very practical guide to staging excellent quizzes of your own.
Release date:
November 4, 2021
Publisher:
Little, Brown Book Group
Print pages:
256
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1. Have questions. This is what this book will provide for you.
2. Nature of questions. Should be interesting in own right etc. Comprehensible. Same applies to answers. Be clear. Same with points.
3. Be firm. Remember: the quizmaster (or quizmistress) is always right. Even if you claim that 1 + 1 = 45, IT IS THE ANSWER ON THE SHEET and you must stand firm. That way, if you change your mind and grudgingly admit that 1+1 may sometimes = 2, you look magnanimous and kind.
4. Make sure each team has a NAME. If they have trouble choosing a name, suggest something short, as you will be reading their name out a lot during the quiz. And pretend to laugh when someone shouts out, ‘We’re called Quiz Team Aguilera!’ for the fourteenth time.
5. Make sure each team writes their name on each of their answer sheets.
6. Make sure that someone, probably you, adds up the scores during the course of the quiz as it can be overwhelming if you leave it till the end, especially if you’ve had a drink.
7. Give out scores so far after the break or halfway through: teams love to know how they are doing.
8. Do not take any nonsense from bullies and cheats. Banish cheats; they spoil the event for everyone. THE QUIZMASTER (OR QUIZMISTRESS) IS ALWAYS RIGHT.
9. Include PICTURE ROUNDS. These add variety to the quiz, give your voice a rest and buy you time to mark scores. Picture rounds are easy to prepare for: just gather five or six related images from the internet, put them on one page and either print them off and hand them out or show them on a screen. Remember to remove identifying names and words! This book is full of picture rounds for your assistance.
10. Have AUDIO ROUNDS. These take up time, but also add variety to the quiz. Editing software means it’s easy to make audio extracts from songs, videos and even spoken word. There’s lots of different kinds of software out there. I generally find thirty seconds is the best length as it avoids moaning that the clip is too short. And you can always play them twice. Again, this quiz book offers many examples of audio rounds.
11. Have prizes and giveaways. Or charge people.
12. Pens and paper! Drinks and snacks!
13. Have a tie-breaker ready, just in case two teams score the same points.
14. And remember:
THE QUIZMASTER**IS ALWAYS RIGHT!
_________
* or quizmistress
** or quizmistress
ROUND ONE – PREQUEL OPPORTUNITIES
Please name the shows/books/movies of which these claim to be prequels.
1. First of the Summer Wine
2. The Magician’s Nephew
3. The Good the Bad and the Ugly
4. Red Dragon
5. The Silmarillion
6. Wide Sargasso Sea
7. Wicked
8. Rock and Chips
9. Manhunter
10. The Flashman Papers
ROUND TWO – WHO, WHAT OR WHOSE?
Who are they?
1. Which TV detective is cousin to Clangers creator Oliver Postgate?
2. What was the name of Barack Obama’s dog?
3. Who was Captain Beefheart’s favourite poet?
4. Who was Sophie Dahl’s paternal grandfather?
5. Which Bond girl is Wreckless Eric’s second cousin?
6. Who spent the coronation of George VI at home, knitting?
7. Whose last words were ‘Bugger Bognor’?
ROUND THREE – AUDIO ROUND – TRIBUTES
Source, edit and play clips from these songs, all tributes to various musical acts. One point if you can name the song, another if you can name who recorded it.
1. ‘I’ll Be Missing You’ – P Diddy
2. ‘Geno’ – Dexys Midnight Runners
3. ‘Lady Stardust’ – David Bowie
4. ‘Four Horsemen’ – The Clash
5. ‘The Story of a Rock ’n’ Roll Band’ – Randy Newman
6. ‘Shine on You Crazy Diamond’ – Pink Floyd
ROUND FOUR – PICTURE ROUND – SOAPLESSLY DEVOTED TO YOU
Source pictures of characters from various soap operas for teams to identify the soap.
Remember, to prepare for a picture round, you need to copy photos, etc. from the internet and crop them to show the relevant parts (and don’t forget to remove identifying names and words!).
1. The Archers
2. Brookside
3. Dynasty
4. Eldorado
5. Dallas
6. Albion Market
7. Emmerdale
8. Coronation Street
ROUND FIVE – ENDORSEMENTS – TRUE OR FALSE
The following people endorsed these products – true or false?
1. Louis Armstrong – Laxatives
2. Johnny Rotten – Anchor Butter
3. Ozzy Osbourne – I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter!
4. Mikhail Gorbachev – Louis Vuitton
5. Old Dirty Bastard – Crisps
6. The Rolling Stones – Rice Krispies
7. The Flintstones – Winston cigarettes
8. Pelé – Viagra
ROUND SIX – LINKED
All these questions are . . . linked. Answer them to find the connections!
1. Who narrated The Wombles on TV?
2. On which song does Maya Angelou duet with Jessica Mitford?
3. Unity Mitford was conceived in which aptly named Canadian town?
4. On YouTube, which famous film is the basis for parodies in which Hitler gets really cross about modern entertainment stories?
5. One of those stories involved Lou Reed making an album with which heavy metal group?
6. What is the name of the heavy metal group featured in a hilarious documentary whose drummer is called Robb Reiner?
7. And what is the name of the fictional heavy metal group featured in a hilarious documentary directed by Rob Reiner?
8. The comedians who made up that group also made a film about a famous director visiting a small-town theatre group. Name the film.
9. Which famous play was staged in London featuring two of the stars of the X-Men movies?
10. And which other X-Men star appeared in the all-singing all-dancing 1999 West End production of Oklahoma?
ROUND SEVEN – NAMING THE DETECTIVES
Name the fictional sleuth who . . .
1. Is obsessed with brains and moustaches.
2. Compares everything to home village.
3. Is basically a human Swiss Army knife.
4. Pronounces all initial consonants as ‘r’.
5. Hasn’t had any dinner.
6. Likes classical music and is rude.
7. Has a cocaine problem.
8. Publishes books of poetry.
9. Is two and a half centimetres tall.
ROUND EIGHT – DANCE STAR OR COMIC CHARACTER?
In this round, please state whether each name is either a dance-music star or a comic-strip character.
1. The Yellow Kid
2. Mumzy Stranger
3. Dizzee Rascal
4. Little Nemo
5. Molester Mole
6. Snoopy
7. Tinchy Stryder
8. Lord Snooty
ROUND ONE – PREQUEL OPPORTUNITIES
1. Last of the Summer Wine
2. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, although The Narnia Books is acceptable
3. A Fistful of Dollars or For a Few Dollars More
4. The Silence of the Lambs
5. The Hobbit or Lord of the Rings
6. Jane Eyre
7. The Wizard of Oz
8. Only Fools and Horses
9. The Silence of the Lambs, again
10. Tom Brown’s Schooldays
ROUND TWO – WHO, WHAT OR WHOSE?
1. Angela Lansbury
2. Bo
3. Philip Larkin
4. Stanley Holloway (not Roald Dahl, who was her maternal grandfather)
5. Gemma Arterton
6. The Duke of Windsor, aka Edward VIII
7. George V
ROUND THREE – AUDIO ROUND – TRIBUTES
1. Notorious B.I.G.
2. Geno Washington
3. Marc Bolan
4. The Clash (yes, a self-tribute)
5. E.L.O.
6. Syd Barrett
ROUND FOUR – PICTURE ROUND – SOAPLESSLY DEVOTED TO YOU
1. The Archers
2. Brookside
3. Dynasty
4. Eldorado
5. Dallas
6. Albion Market
7. Emmerdale
8. Coronation Street
ROUND FIVE – ENDORSEMENTS – TRUE OR FALSE
1. True
2. True
3. True
4. True
5. True – ‘Rap Snacks’
6. True
7. True
8. True
ROUND SIX – LINKED
1. Bernard Cribbins
2. ‘Right, Said Fred’
3. Swastika, Ontario
4. Downfall
5. Metallica
6. Anvil
7. Spinal Tap
8. Waiting for Guffman
9. Waiting for Godot
10. Hugh Jackman
ROUND SEVEN – NAMING THE DETECTIVES
1. Hercule Poirot
2. Miss Marple
3. Inspector Gadget
4. Scooby-Doo (yes, he’s a detective)
5. Regan (The Sweeney)
6. Inspector Morse
7. Sherlock Holmes
8. Adam Dalgliesh
9. Inch High Private Eye
ROUND EIGHT – DANCE STAR OR COMIC CHARACTER?
1. Comic-book character
2. Dance star
3. Dance star
4. Comic-book character
5. Comic-book character
6. Comic-book character
7. Dance star
8. Comic-book character
ROUND ONE – TAG THAT AND PARTY
Name the movies whose taglines these were.
1. ‘They had absolutely nothing. But they were willing to risk it all’
2. ‘You’ll laugh. You’ll cry.You’ll hurl’
3. ‘Five criminals. One line-up. No coincidences’
4. ‘If you see one movie in 1999, see Star Wars. But, if you see two movies, see ours’
5. ‘In space no one can hear you scream’
6. ‘Dance she did, and dance she must – Between her two loves’
7. ‘He is afraid. He is alone. He is three million light years from home’
8. ‘Nobody does him better’
9. ‘Does for rock and roll what The Sound of Music did for hills’
10. ‘No goats. No glory’
ROUND TWO – DROP THE PILOT AND OTHER ANSWERS
Answer these – hint – linked questions.
1. What kind of term is the phrase ‘Dropping the Pilot’?
2. What are carried through the street of Ottery St Mary on the night of 29th October every year?
3. What is Joanne Rowling’s middle name?
4. Who were Belka and Strelka?
5. Who was the subject of the Tenniel cartoon, Dropping the Pilot?
6. There are two Kansas Cities in America, right next door to each other. One’s in Kansas. Where. . .
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