Night Awakens

by Mary Higgins Clark

Genres: General Fiction; Mystery; Suspense

Synopsis

The crowned Queen of Suspense, #1 New York Times bestselling author Mary Higgins Clark, has no peer in the realm of stylish, sophisticated thrillers -- brilliant, breathtaking tales that delve into the deepest affairs of the heart, the darkest crimes of passion. Now, in that same haunting tradition, she invites a star-studded cast of authors to share original stories of men and women joined in love...and driven to murder. Sara Shankman puts a chilling new spin on payback... Joseph Hansen slaps a rancher with a cold wake-up call out on the trail... Loren D. Estleman cuts a honeymoon short when a bride learns she's married to the mob... Brendan DuBois drives a brother to distractionon the road to revenge... Sally Gunning pushes jealousy to a murderous extreme... Nancy Pickard exposes the truth behind the headlines as a young love leads to old-fashioned homicide...and a panoply of other renouned writers spellbind us with the seductive charms of love, lust, and other lethal attractions.

Release date: February 1, 2000

Publisher: Pocket Books

Print pages: 320

Sample

The Perils of Pond Scum

Two minutes after it happened, I wasn't sure it had. I could see the glass on the door from the broken picture, I could feel the throb in the back of my head where it had snapped into the wall, but I could also see and feel Jeffrey, his face contorted with shock, his hand trembling as it touched my face.

"My God, Hannah, look at us. Do you see what you've done? Is this how you want it?"

I pushed his hand away, trying to focus. What had I done? I had walked into the dark apartment. My apartment. Jeffrey's voice had come at me. Where have you been? I'd reached for the light, but something had kept me from it. Hands. Strong. Angry. Had they grabbed me? Thrown me? I'd crashed backward into the wall. I knew that much. I'd crashed into the wall, and the light had come on, and there was Jeffrey.

Jeffrey. In my apartment. A week after I'd told him I needed some time alone.

"Forgive me," said Jeffrey now. I could see the rise and fall of his chest under the shirt as he struggled to calm himself. "I frightened you, didn't I? I wanted to talk. I let myself in. But you upset me, Hannah. I had no intention of -- " He broke off and dashed a hand across his face. "Are you all right?"

I felt my head and winced.

"You're not. Here. Sit down." He led me to the couch and sat beside me.
Skillful, gentle fingers probed my scalp. That was one of the first things I'd
loved about Jeffrey. First the wide, easy smile, but second had been those competent, reassuring hands.

No, it couldn't have been his hands.

Jeffrey stopped probing and smoothed back my hair. "Not even a goose egg. But you see what can happen. I'm sorry I barged in and frightened you. This isn't me tonight. But this isn't you, either. This isn't like you, sneaking around."

"I wasn't sneaking around. I went with Ellen and Paul to -- "

"You can leave Ellen out of it, Hannah. We know Ellen wasn't there, don't we? It was you and Paul. But Ellen's part of the problem, too, isn't she? Your sister doesn't like us spending all our time together, does she? I don't know why you listen to her. That's where the problem lies. You don't need time alone. We need time alone. Just the two of us, without all this
interference. I know what we'll do, we'll go the cabin."

"Jeffrey -- "

"Hush." Jeffrey leaned back, bringing me with him until my cheek rested on the hard plane of his chest.

"You know I'm right, Hannah. You don't solve problems by hiding from them. We'll get out of the city, go to the cabin for the long weekend on Saturday. We'll be alone. We'll talk. We'll sort this out." While he talked, his hands, those hands, stroked my hair, my neck, my face.

I knew I should move, get up, ask him to leave. Why did it suddenly seem so hard, so pointless, so...so silly? And what if Jeffrey was right? Maybe if we were alone, if there was no third party to make him angry, if I didn't make him angry...And what had he done, after all? He'd gotten jealous. It was flattering, really.

Jeffrey's hands gripped my shoulders and eased me sideways. "Look, you're right. You need time of your own. I can see that. I'll go now. I'll pick you up
Saturday."

When he picked me up on Saturday, and I saw the fresh haircut, the face shaved to the bone, the jacket I particularly loved that made him look so broad in the
back, I thought of Harry's. That's where we'd met, Harry's Tap. Jeffrey had worn that jacket at Harry's. Everything had been fresh and new at Harry's. Jeffrey had met me, wanted me, wooed me.

"We're getting a good early start," said Jeffrey now. He smiled at me from the driver's seat, that smile I'd first met at Harry's. "Or should I say a good fresh start?"

A fresh start. To go back to the way it was at Harry's. Suddenly, the weekend ahead of me glimmered brightly.

My daydreams dissolved as Jeffrey started talking, filling me in on the history of the cabin. It belonged to Jeffrey's father, divvied his way in a nasty divorce settlement. It was a treasure beyond compare, said Jeffery, sitting virtually alone in the middle of two thousand acres of conservation land. Most of the year, it sat there empty, waiting for Jeffrey's father to remember he owned it and blow down the expressway for a getaway summer weekend with most of the people you'd expect him to want to get away from. He brought business associates, politicians, friends, acquaintances, anyone he could find, said Jeffrey.

Except Jeffrey.

But Jeffrey didn't seem to resent this parental neglect as much as I thought he might. He talked calmly of arranging with his father, once he came of age, for his own time at the cabin. July and August were his father's. The off-season months were Jeffrey's own. Usually, because of the risk of frost, Jeffery
drained the pipes and closed up the cabin the last weekend in September. It was only the unseasonably warm October, a true Indian summer, that had prompted the late visit this year.

At first, as Jeffrey talked about the cabin, I listened attentively -- how there were plenty of deer, fox, trout. How there were no phones, electricity, neighbors. But as the sun beat through the windshield and the tires hummed over the highway and Jeffrey's voice rose and fell, I began to feel drowsy. I closed my eyes.

I woke when we hit the first rut in the dirt road.

"You just missed Fairnham," said Jeffrey.

"Fairnham?"

"Our last sight of civilization. If you could call it that. A post office, a laundromat, and a town hall."

I looked around. On either side of me was nothing but wilderness -- deep, black, wild. Huge pines blocked the light from overhead, and thick seedlings
and bull briars and dead stumps obliterated the ground.

We rattled in and out of the ruts for what seemed like another ten miles, until Jeffrey suddenly yanked the wheel hard right and we plunged into the trees.

I gasped.

Jeffrey laughed. "Almost there now."

When I'd collected myself, I could see that we weren't forging a new trail through virgin forest, as I'd first supposed, but were actually following a faint track through the pine needles and dead leaves. It seemed to go on forever, the forest crowding closer and closer on each side, until finally, just when I was sure if I didn't see sky or light or air I would suffocate,
I saw the glimmer of the water through the trees.

The car rolled to a stop fifty feet on.

"Like it?" asked Jeffrey.

I didn't answer right away. I wasn't sure. If I looked straight ahead, the gloom of the woods seemed to have disappeared as if someone had waved a magic
wand, and the sun stretched a welcome pool of light across the surface of the pond. A narrow dock of rough planking bridged the gap between sun and cabin, but when I turned to look at the cabin itself, I saw that neither sun nor water had penetrated that far. The cabin was nestled in shade so dark it seemed like night, and the deeply stained clapboards of the porch wrapped what I could see of the doors and windows in even blacker shadows. I felt Jeffrey's eyes swivel in my direction.

"Well, Hannah?"

"I...yes. It's...the pond...it's beautiful."

He grinned. "Wait till you see the inside." He pulled me after him up three stone steps to the cabin. When I stepped onto the porch, the floor gave slightly under me. Jeffery pulled a rusty key from his jacket pocket, scraped it into the lock, and the door opened with a moan. He stood back, and I stepped inside.

It smelled of must. A pale green light oozed through a crack in the shutters and wobbled across the floor, illuminating what the previous tenants had left us chewed mattress batting, empty seed casings, mice droppings. My eyes traveled to the farther wall.

A pair of beady black eyes stared back at me.

I shrieked.

Two paces took Jeffrey across the room. He snatched something off the wall, pulling it into the light. The glass eyes of a stuffed fox gleamed at me.
Jeffrey laughed. He put the fox down and showed me around.

The room we stood in seemed to be most of it -- living area to the left of the wood stove, with an iron cot for a couch and a wooden crate for a table. The
kitchen was to the right of the stove -- a wood table, two chairs with missing rungs, a small ice box, a sink complete with rusty pump, a metal cupboard. A
collection of fishing rods hung suspended from the rafters.

Jeffrey led me into the bedroom. The bed seemed to fill it, with no more than a foot to spare all around. I looked for the bathroom and found it through a crack in the shutters, a box like a wooden phone booth twenty yards off in the pines. I must have peered through that cracked shutter a long time.

Jeffrey spoke from behind me. "Who's out there?"

"No one. Aren't there any neighbors at all?"

"Not anymore. I told you, we're smack dab in the middle of conservation land. Our cabin and the Blakes' down the beach were the only ones here before the park came in. By law, we both have lifetime use, but Blake abandoned his a couple of years ago. Come on. You clean up while I open up. The broom's behind
the ice box."

Jeffrey went out, and almost at once I heard the sound of creaking boards as he removed the shutters. The light that filtered in through the trees did little to lighten the dark rooms. I found the broom and swept up the mouse residue. I unpacked our sheets and made the bed. By the time I'd filled the kitchen cupboard with our provisions, Jeffery was no longer there.

I stepped out onto the porch. No Jeffrey. The sun was high above the towering trees, but I could see the spot where it would later disappear behind them, off
to the west, and I felt a moment of panic. I didn't want to see this place without the sun. I crept onto the dock and looked along the beach. I saw a second dilapidated dock a hundred yards to the left but no signs of life. Jeffrey had been right. Our lone neighbor was gone.

I turned around and called, hoping I'd defeated any sounds of panic. "Jeffrey!"

"Down here." The voice came from underneath the cabin somewhere. "Pipes are all right. Try the pump, will you?"

I went inside and pumped the handle. Rusty brown filth sputtered out into the sink.

"Keep going," said Jeffrey behind me. "It'll clear."

He disappeared again, but by the time I'd pumped the water clear, he was back with an armload of wood.

"I'll have to cut more. We'll need the stove nights."

Nights.

Suddenly, I felt the need of air. Sunlight. "Could we take a walk?"

Jeffrey followed me out. I stood on the dock and looked left and right. The choice was clear. To the east, the white sand beach disappeared into choking
reeds and undergrowth twenty yards beyond our dock, but to the west, the sand stretched in a welcoming crescent all the way to the absent neighbor's dock
and beyond. We stepped o the dock and walked west.

Sun or no sun, I found myself reaching for Jeffery's hand. As we neared the Blake cottage, his fingers tensed in mine.

"What's the matter?"

"There's a chair on the porch."

"Oh? You think he's here?"

"No. He hasn't come in years. And there's no car. I just never noticed that chair before."

Jeffrey stared at the cabin, and I stared with him, curious. It seemed much like ours, only smaller, if that were possible, with the same dark clapboards and tiny windows, but the sticks and leaves on the roof, the rip in the screen door, made it seem somehow lonely and forlorn.

Jeffrey seemed to find it the same. He turned us around. "Come on, let's go back. We've got work to do."

Jeffrey assigned me my usual chores -- washing the dishes, making the stew. After I'd figured out the ways and means of the primitive kitchen and the stew was bubbling on the stove, I stepped outside and was surprised to see most of the day was gone. The sun brushed the tops of the trees. I could hear the sound of Jeffrey's ax behind me in the woods somewhere. I walked out on the dock and sat down, my feet dangling just above the water, watching the sun disappear.

Suddenly, one of the tall, dark posts on the distant dock moved. Something splashed out of the water, danced into the air, flopped back into the water.

After I saw the fish, I noticed the black rod, arching between the long shadow of the man on the dock and the fish. I watched, fascinated, as the rod dipped and reared, the man rocking with it, until the fish blasted out of the water again. It gave one last sharp, silver twist in midair and seemed to grow wings. The rod snapped backward, the fish soared in a graceful arc and splashed into the pond, free.

I hadn't meant to clap. The sound seemed to echo over the water like a small burst of cannon fire. The shadow on the dock turned in my direction. I felt the
dock tremble under my feet, and Jeffrey spoke from behind me.

"So he is here."

I turned, surprised at his tone, the words more hissed than spoken.

I touched Jeffrey's arm. "So he's here. It doesn't matter."

"Doesn't matter? Of course it matters. That was the point. I wanted us to be alone."

I laughed, waving a shaky hand at the miles and miles of blackening woods. "I think we've got enough room."

Jeffrey looked down at me. The lumpiness in his jaw eased as he smiled. The odd sunless panic I'd felt moved off. He put his arm around me, and we walked together up the dock.

Just before we stepped onto the porch, I looked again for the fisherman, but he was gone.

The lantern helped. So did the wood stove. So did the bubbling stew. So did Jeffrey, the old Jeffrey, the Jeffrey of Harry's Tap, talking and laughing and
reaching across the rickety table to touch my hand.

Once the stew was gone, the plates washed, the wine glasses refilled, he stood up and led me to the cot. He propped the pillows behind him, pulled me down
against his shoulder. "Now," he said. "Let's hear it. What's wrong? What's happened to us, Hannah? Or should I ask what's happened to you? I still feel the same. And you know, deep down inside where it counts, I think you do, too."

"Jeffrey," I said, and stalled. It must have been the wine. My mind seemed to have slipped into neutral.

"That's it, then. I was right, wasn't I? It's not us. When it's just the two of us, away, alone, there's nothing wrong. You belong with me, Hannah, can't you see that?"

"I...yes...sometimes..."

The arm around me tightened. Was he angry? I didn't want Jeffrey angry. And now, right now, it did seem that I belonged there with him. The wood crackled comfortably in the stove, the lantern warmed the dark wood walls, Jeffrey's hands warmed my skin, and any misgivings I might have had about him seemed to recede with the black woods.

But I slept badly that night, just the same, too alert to woods noises and cabin smells and phantom visions. When daylight came, I did better and was
still in a muddled half-doze when Jeffrey's lips brushed my cheek at nine.

"I have to run into town for ice. Stay put. The coffee's on the stove."

The words hardly registered. I only snapped wide awake when the car engine roared. "Jeffrey!" I grabbed my robe and raced onto the porch, but I was seconds too late. The car's brake lights winked once through the trees and were gone.

But the sun was there, a glorious lemon balloon floating over the treetops, already dispelling the shadows and warming the air. I went inside for coffee and brought it out onto the dock. I stretched my toes to the water. It was surprisingly warm. When I finished the coffee, I went back inside, put on my
bathing suit, took a running start off the dock, and plunged.

It was colder down below. I broke the surface gasping and struck out along the shore in a stiff crawl. It had been some time since I'd done any serious swimming, and I tired way too soon. I was twenty yards from our neighbor's cabin when I stopped, exhausted. I decided to cut straight to shore and walk home. I angled toward the beach and climbed out onto the sand, shivering. I was leaning over wringing out my hair when a voice spoke from behind.

"Stabbed in the back?"

My heart bucked. I turned. A man stood there, not smiling, hands on hips, bare feet planted. The fisherman. It had to be the fisherman. But the long black shadow from the night before now seemed all gold. The sun glinted o the fine hairs on his head, chest, legs, arms. Even the khaki shorts looked gold.

"Stabbed?"

He pointed at my back. "That cut."

I stumbled backward, babbling. "No. No. I wasn't stabbed. It was glass. A picture. A piece of glass. I fell into the wall, and the picture broke, and I was cut with the glass. It was an accident. A silly accident. I -- "

By the time I realized he was smiling, he stopped. He seemed to be looking at me oddly. "It was a joke. Stabbed in the back. No need to explain. But I brought it up because it looks like it could use some attention. I guess you can't see it, but it seems to be infected."

"I...oh." I stood there, breathing.

The man continued to watch me, still with the odd expression. Finally, he stretched out a hand. "Peter. Peter Blake."

I took the hand. "Hannah Templeton. I'm staying over there." I pointed to Jeffrey's cabin.

"I assumed so. You're the clapper. So you enjoy seeing men starve?"

"I...starve?"

"That fish last night was my dinner. I'm not torturing them for fun." He half smiled. "But it is fun. Especially when they put up a good fight." He stopped. He seemed to be waiting. For what, an apology?

"I'm sorry," I said. "I didn't mean to clap. It was just so beautiful, and it fought so hard. It -- "

That half-smile again. "I know. He deserved to win. Will you be here long?"

"A week." I paused, at a loss. "We were surprised to see you here."

"Surprised?"

"I suppose I should say Jeffrey was surprised. He said you didn't come here
anymore. Do you know Jeffrey? Jeffrey Holtz? It's his father's cabin."

What smile there was disappeared. "I know Jeff. It's true I haven't been here in a couple of years. Last time I came, it wasn't too...pleasant."

"Well, it's certainly pleasant now."

Peter Blake didn't seem to agree. At least, he didn't answer. Maybe it had seemed more pleasant before I'd blundered onto what he must consider his front
lawn.

"I'm sorry," I said again lamely. "I suppose I'm trespassing. But if I hadn't walked ashore here, I'd have washed up drowned. I don't suppose you'd have
found that too pleasant, either."

Something happened to his face. What was it? He made no attempt to answer my inane babblings, not that they deserved it, but something about the way he
continued to look at me convinced me it was best to shut up and move on. "I'd better go," I said. "Goodluck with tonight's dinner. I promise to clap if you
win."

I left him standing there, tall, gold, silent in the sun.

Jeffrey was on our dock, waiting for me. "What was all that about?"

"That's Peter Blake. He -- "

"I know who he is. I asked you what you were doing."

I had one foot on the dock when he spoke. I took it back and left it in the sand. Not Jeffrey angry. Please, not Jeffrey angry. "I swam too far and decided to walk home. He came up and introduced himself. That's all."

"You jumped into the water without knowing the first thing about it, is that it?"

"No, I -- "

"I don't know why your idiocies still amaze me, Hannah. I should be used to it by now. Just the same, you might be interested to know there's a huge drop-
off out there. Don't you know if you tire yourself, you leave yourself susceptible to cramp? Don't you know how easy it is to drown? And don't think Peter Blake will save you. He didn't lift a finger when his fiancée drowned." Jeffrey turned and went inside.

I followed him. "Drowned?"

Jeffrey bent down, fidgeted with the stove, and spoke without turning around. "Two years ago. Right out there."

"Oh, no."

"Served her right. It was damned foolish. She had a few drinks, took the boat out, went over the side, and drowned."

"And he couldn't save her?"

"Couldn't or wouldn't. He said he wasn't even here. But if he had been, I doubt he'd have bothered. She'd been fooling around."

"Jeffrey!"

He straightened. The look he gave me was almost amused. "According to his version, they'd planned to meet here that weekend to talk things over, but
when he got here, she was already dead. He was the one who found her body washed up on the beach over there."

"Oh, no."

Jeffrey turned around. "For God's sake, Hannah, calm down. I was only trying to warn you, that's all. You'll be all right if you're careful."

"It's not that. I...I said something awful. To Peter Blake. I told him I almost washed up on his beach drowned. He gave me the oddest look. I couldn't
figure out -- "

I stopped mid-sentence as Jeffrey tipped back his head and laughed.

We hardly spoke at lunch. My mind was on my conversation with Peter Blake. I could feel myself blushing with mortification, and I could feel Jeffrey watching me, but I didn't meet his eyes. If he laughed again...

I was reprieved after lunch when Jeffrey went off into the woods to dig worms. When he returned, he pulled a fishing rod from the rafters and an old battered aluminum canoe from under the cabin where it had been stored. "Want to come?"

I shook my head.

Jeffrey shoved the canoe into the water and paddled out until he'd disappeared around a bend in the pond. I watched him from the window over the sink as I scrubbed the lunch dishes. When I finished cleaning up, I pulled a blanket o the shelf in the bedroom, went down to the beach, and spread it on the warm sand. But I didn't sit down. I couldn't, not with Peter Blake on my mind. What must he think of me? He must have assumed I knew his whole story and had been goading him cruelly. I summoned most of what little courage I'd ever possessed and walked down the beach, to his cabin.

He was on the porch, fixing the torn screen in the door, still without a shirt, the long, smooth muscles in his back ebbing and flowing under the gold skin until he heard me and turned around. I didn't give him a chance to speak. "I've come to apologize for what must have seemed like some very pointed and unnecessarily cruel remarks. I promise you I had no idea what happened until Jeffrey told me an hour ago. I never would have said...I wouldn't make light...I certainly didn't...I only hope you can bring yourself to understand -- "

There was no question of a smile this time, but his voice, when he spoke, sounded warmer than I deserved. "I understood two minutes after you'd gone.
It was obvious you weren't the type to go in for cruel jokes. There's no apology necessary. I'm only sorry I wasn't able to recover enough to ease your mind at the time."

"Oh, please, don't you apologize. It was all my fault. Jeffrey says I always babble like an idiot whenever I'm nervous. Thank you for being so nice about it and for bearing with my babbling a second time. Good-bye."

I turned around and beat it out of there, already down all three steps and onto the beach when I heard him say, "Good-bye."

I returned to my blanket and collapsed on my back, exhausted but with conscience eased. I think I fell asleep, but I couldn't have slept long. When I woke, I sat up and looked around. Jeffrey was still nowhere in sight, but for once I was glad. I realized somewhat belatedly there were other things worth looking at. Driving through the acres of woods, I'd noticed nothing but pine and oak, but across the pond there must have been a decent smattering of swamp maples and beeches, identifiable by the bright swatches of red and yellow among the green and bronze. The pond glistened silver in the sun, the sky was that turquoise blue that only seemed to happen in October, and the air was just crisp enough for the sun to seem worth its weight in gold.

Gold. Was it the word that made me think of Peter Blake and look his way, or was it some unearthly intuition? Whichever it was, the minute I glanced
down the beach, he emerged from his cabin and walked in my direction. He came up to the edge of the blanket and extended a hand. The hand held a white
tube of some kind. "For that cut."

I reached up and accepted the tube. I read the label, an antibiotic cream. "Thank you, but it's not that bad. Honestly."

I tried to hand back the tube, but he gazed down at me solemnly. His eyes were the pale green of water over sand. "I wish you'd use it. I've seen things like
that get nasty."

"All right." I laid the tube beside me on the blanket.

"I'd soak it first. In warm water."

I laughed. "Warm water's a little hard to come by around here."

His mouth jerked in that almost-smile. Now, of course, I could understand why that smile never made it any farther. And as I studied him closer, I realized
the reason he looked so gold was because of the tan. I looked toward the water to rest my eyes and saw that Jeffrey's canoe had finally reappeared.

"Just how do you fall into a wall?"

I started, flustered. "Excuse me?"

"You said you fell into a wall. How do you do that, exactly?"

I could see Jeffrey facing our way, spine stiff and alert. I stood up. "Do you know, it seems colder out here now than it did this morning. I think I'd better go in."

"It'll be colder inside. Look, I know it's none of my business -- " He broke off.

I kept my eyes glued to the pond. Jeffrey was paddling hard in our direction. I scooped up my blanket and the tube of cream. "I have to go. Thank you for this. I'll be sure to return it before I leave."

"I don't need it. Look -- " He began again.

I turned to face him. There was no suggestion of a smile anywhere this time. His eyes seemed locked onto me.

And I stood there caught in the beam until the canoe scraped on the sand and Jeffrey bounded up thebeach toward us.

I'd been foolish to be so afraid. Jeffrey's hand was out, his teeth gleaming, as he approached the other man. "Blake. Good to see you back. It's been some
time."

But we weren't out of the woods yet. It was Peter Blake, not Jeffrey, whose face had turned to stone, and for a minute it looked as if he would ignore
Jeffery's hand. I think I closed my eyes. Take it. Dear God, take his hand. When I looked again, the two hands, one large and brown, the other large and white, were clenched.

I breathed.

The green eyes flicked toward mine, then back to Jeffrey, and Peter Blake withdrew his hand. "You're up late this year."

"Yes," said Jeffery. "Decided to take a chance on the frost. Worth it, don't you think?" He smiled at me, and I smiled back. He held out an arm, and I moved close enough so he could drape it around me. I knew the routine.

Peter Blake watched. "I brought your friend something for that cut on her back. I noticed it this morning. I'm afraid it might need medical attention."

"I've been keeping an eye on it," said Jeffrey. "Thank you. Hannah, you look cold. Let's get you back inside. How long do you plan to stay, Blake?"

"A few days. I've got some work to do on the cabin."

"Then I'm sure we'll see you," said Jeffrey.

"Yes, I'm sure you will."

I said good-bye. Peter Blake nodded in return. Jeffrey led me inside, arm still gripping my shoulder.

To this day, I don't know just what it was, if it was Peter Blake's question or the way he'd watched Jeffrey and me, but it was there on the beach that I think I saw Jeffrey, the real Jeffrey, the man behind the smile, the man behind those hands, for the first time. Whatever it was, by the time I'd stepped out of the sun and into the darkness of the cabin, I knew.

I hadn't fallen into that wall.

And I didn't belong with Jeffrey.

My first thought as we walked inside was that I would tell him right away. I would tell him I didn't want to see him anymore, and we'd pack up and go home, and my life would return to normal. Normal. It had taken a silly conversation on a beach in the middle of the wilderness for me to realize how abnormal my life had become. I saw no friends, I saw no family, I saw no one but Jeffrey. And what had happened the minute I tried to reestablish contact
with a few of those people I'd left so ruthlessly in the dust? Jeffrey had whisked me out of their reach. I think that was when I finally realized how afraid I really was. Suddenly, I knew it would be very foolish to tell Jeffrey of my decision to leave him while we were trapped here alone. Better to let him think everything was fine until we'd returned to civilization. That, then, was my goal: to return as fast as possible to civilization. With a great effort of will, I slipped my hand around his waist and smiled up at him.

"How was the fishing?"

"Nothing doing. Not that I expected it. They usually don't surface till around dusk. How about it? Want to learn how to fish? You seemed fascinated enough by Blake's poor effort yesterday."

"I'd love to," I said. What else could I say? To say anything else would convince him I was interested only in Peter Blake's fishing, not Jeffery's. Oh, I knew him so well in so many