Day One
October 25
1
6:33 p.m.
The blood-orange sun balanced for one dazzling moment, trapped on the mountain ledge. It slipped behind the ridge, leaving us in the hushed shadows of twilight. I wished I could do the same: slip away.
Lit by the car’s high beams, the winding road stretched like a ribbon ahead. The glaring brightness made the surrounding landscape seem even darker.
“Are you sure we’re not lost?” I asked Mum, glancing at the nothingness around us. “Only it’s been an hour since you said we were almost at the cabin.”
“It’s a Tesla. Teslas don’t get lost.” Mum flicked back her long blond hair. “I know you’re not a big fan of the great outdoors, Lottie, but Oliver’s cabin is so lovely. And as he’s your stepfather now, it’s your place too. There’s nothing for you to worry about. It will be fun.”
“Yep,” I said, thankful that it was too dark to see how close to plummeting off the edge we were.
Vague outlines of tall, dark pines appeared at the sides of the road. We sped by a smaller turnoff, leading deeper into the forest, a sign to a campsite, a lone store—Soto’s Shakes & Supplies—a cross by the side of the road, and then nothing but Mum’s off-key singing and the squeal of tires as she spun around the corners.
I stared at the first evening stars through the sunroof. They were so bright. Of course, because there was no light pollution. We were driving through endless wilderness. I should have known it would be a rustic cabin, in the middle of nowhere. I’d be trapped there with no escape. My chest felt hollow. I swallowed.
“It will all be better in the daylight, Lottie. Then you’ll see how beautifully stunning Tahoe is. Now here we are!” She turned down a narrow road and glided the Tesla smoothly onto a long driveway, stopping abruptly in front of a cabin.
My Frappuccino fell from the cupholder, spilling its dregs onto the white leather divider. I wiped the sticky blob with a crushed napkin.
“Is keeping my wedding gift clean for one day too much to ask?” Mum glared at me.
“Sorry.” I licked the chocolate residue that freckled the back of my pale white hand. We’d barely arrived, and I’d already disappointed her.
She sighed.
I waited. I knew what was coming. The talk.
“Lottie, I’m trusting you.” She stretched her fingers on the steering wheel to better admire her brand-new wedding ring, glinting in the dark. “It’s not like I’m asking a lot. It’s only one night.”
I hoped my mother’s new marriage would last longer than that. I stared at the cabin. It was nestled into the side of a hill, surrounded by silhouetted pine trees, dark shapes against darker shapes. Anything could be out there. “It’s just so isolated.”
“That’s what makes it so safe.” Mum smoothed out the creases in her ivory shift dress. “Jade’s sweet and extremely smart, like her dad. It will be good for you to spend this weekend together. She’s really looking forward to having more time with you.”
I seriously doubted that. During the three times we’d met, we’d spoken twice, and both of those were a monosyllabic hi. And one sorry (not sorry) when she “accidentally” slammed the car door on my foot. “I don’t have much choice, do I?” I asked.
“Lottie, it is our honeymoon. We’ll be back tomorrow, for God’s sake. Oliver’s planned this lovely time for you and Jade in the cabin. Aren’t you excited? I thought you were happy for us.”
“I am.” It was hard to sound genuine about something that didn’t seem real. That morning’s city hall wedding was over in less time than it had taken for us to find parking in downtown San Francisco.
“The cabin’s fabulous—you’ll love it. Anyway, it’s not like you’ve got anything else to do.” She tilted the rearview mirror, checking that her scarlet lipstick hadn’t bled into her white skin.
“No, and who’s fault is that? Moving every six months doesn’t exactly help,” I pointed out. Every time I’d start to fit in and actually have friends, we’d move and suddenly I’d be a stranger with a weird accent all over again. If I ever forgot about it, I’d be reminded. The novelty of my English accent never wore off for people here. Yes, I’m from England; no, I don’t want to say “water” for you, again. “Five schools in two years, and now another, in my senior year?”
“Don’t blame me for your introverted personality, blame your dad. You’re so like him—always seeing the negative instead of the opportunity. Things will be better now, you’ll see.” She smiled, all fake cheer and white teeth. I seriously wondered if she was my mum at all. “We’re all going to be one big happy family.”
I wanted her to be right, but I knew this would be one more in a long line of broken promises. Only this time there was another kid’s heart to break as well. “I hope so. I really do. But right now, my special role in this arrangement is being a companion to a fifteen year old. So, sorry if this situation doesn’t look that rosy to me.”
“
Almost sixteen. You only just turned seventeen. There’s barely a year between you, and she’s way more mature than you’re being right now!”
A gust of wind rattled through the car. I shivered. The cold, the mountains, and that sound—for a moment I was back there, holding Dad’s calloused hand, trekking up stony trails, wind whipping in my ears, eyes streaming. He called them Father-Daughter Days. I called them Goodbye Days. The next morning he’d be gone, off on another mountaineering expedition, away for months. I’d pretend to be sick to stop him from leaving—he’d always go anyway. So much for happy families.
I swung out of the car and slammed the door.
“Lottie!” Mum hissed after me. “Don’t you dare screw this up!”
As usual, so trusting in my abilities. I pretended not to hear, held my head high, and marched up to the cabin’s front door.
“You’ve arrived!” Oliver, my new stepdad, gathered me in a bear hug. “I was worried your mom had got lost.” His cashmere sweater smelled of cinnamon and earth.
For a moment I allowed myself to feel wanted, safe, protected. But there was no use pretending. I pulled myself away. “She couldn’t resist one last Starbucks stop.”
“Well, it’s good to finally have you here.” He grinned, brown eyes crinkling at the edges, like they were used to smiling. All of his features were smooth and warm—brown skin, round cheeks, smooth, bald head, and his deep voice, which made it sound like he meant every word he said.
I stood there, clutching my battered backpack.
“At least we had time to open up the cabin and check everything worked before you arrived. Lights, power, fire.” He clapped his hands. “It always takes a little while for the hot water to heat up when no one’s been here for a while, but it should be fine in half an hour or so. Jade’s been waiting for you.” Oliver moved aside to reveal her, sitting cross-legged on the cream suede sofa in the middle of the enormous living room.
“Hello.” I gave a little wave, like that was a normal thing for a stepsister to do.
She gave me a nod and returned to her Switch game. A black curl had escaped her high bun and bounced gently against her brown neck, as her fingers tapped the console. She’d changed out of this morning’s sapphire dress into ripped blue jeans and a soft gray cardigan over a teal EXTINCTION IS FOREVER T-shirt. I bet her sweater was cashmere like her dad’s. I suddenly felt the weight of my consignment store fleece. It was North Face, probably a nineties original. I fiddled with my oversized watch, stopping as soon as I realized I was acting nervous.
“Don’t mind her. She’s a little shy, but get her talking about anything nature and she’s your friend for life.” Oliver grinned at me, as if I was in on the joke and would actually smile back.
Jade gave an aren’t-parents-embarrassing eye roll. I gave a small smile, like I agreed. But I’d take embarrassment over disappointment any day.
“
Hello, darling!” Mum made her entrance, all flying scarf and crimson peacoat. Oliver swept her up in his arms and twirled her. She flung her head back, squealing in delight.
“Does it drive well? I was getting worried about you.”
Mum tilted her head. “I know I said I’d follow you, but it’s not like you can get lost when there’s only one road. You don’t mind, do you, darling?”
“No, of course not. But I think we’d better rush if you want to make our dinner reservations.” He looked at his watch. “We’re cutting it close.”
“Whatever you decide, darling. Popping to the loo, then I’m all yours.” Mum dashed by me. “Oh, and the Tesla drives like a dream, but it’s almost out of charge.”
“Okay, then.” Oliver grabbed his jacket. “Guess I’m the valet,” he said and went to park the Tesla in the garage.
My throat was dry. I was sinking. I wish I hadn’t agreed to this. It was going to be long and painfully awkward being alone with my new stepsister, but at least it was just for one night. I took a deep breath. Maybe Mum was right, maybe this time would be different. It was a marriage, after all. But it was still her.
Between them, my parents did not have a great track record for relationships. Dad vanished, leaving no trace on my eighth birthday, and Mum was a one-woman tornado of broken promises. Never trust anyone was her motto. Prepare to be let down was mine.
I dropped my backpack by the closet and made my way to the fireplace, bumping into the oak coffee table on my way. Nice entrance. The iron chandelier lights flickered high above me for a second, before returning to normal. I stared at the flickering glow of the flames in the fireplace, rubbing my hands as if I were cold. Pretending to be at ease.
“What are you playing?” I could at least act like I was interested.
“Animal Crossing,” said Jade without lifting her head from the screen.
“Oh.” I glanced up at the cathedral ceiling, feeling smaller by the second.
“You’re in the guestroom downstairs.” She pointed to the stairwell.
“Right. Thanks.” I wondered if I could leave out some back door and disappear. Jade would be fine playing her game, and Mum wouldn’t even notice I was missing. Not that there was anywhere to go.
Oliver hugged Jade goodbye. “Bye sweetie.”
“Bye, Dad. Love ya.” Jade smiled.
“Love you too.” He kissed her cheek. Like the perfect dad in a television commercial.
I stood there feeling like a total intruder.
“Sorry, Lottie,” said Oliver. “I was going to leave you the Land Rover, but I guess we’re taking that now. I’m charging the Tesla for you. It will be ready in a few hours. You’ll be fine until then. And don’t let Jade trick you into letting her drive. She only just got her permit.” He smiled.
I
didn’t dare tell him I hadn’t got my license yet. “Just don’t disappear on us.” It came out sounding more desperate than I’d meant it to.
He shook his head. “Never. I promise.”
***
They were ready in seconds, a flurry of coats and hugs, and off they went—the black Land Rover’s headlights slicing through the night.
Oliver called out of the car window: “Don’t worry about the snowstorm. We’ll be back long before then. And Jade knows where everything is!”
“What snowstorm?” I shouted, but they couldn’t hear me above their music. “What things?” Oliver was already singing along to Coldplay. Mum’s choice, for sure.
I lingered at the front door until the taillights disappeared. A breeze ruffled the branches, sending gentle waves through the surrounding woods. I shivered. The air was too thin, too cold, and too lung-stabbingly sharp. A crow cawed from the top of an overhanging pine. The bird stared at me with black marble eyes. My neck tingled; I had the sensation that I was being watched. I turned and stared at the trees, as if I could make out anything hiding in there. It was so dark, so quiet. Waiting-for-something-to-happen quiet.
A gust of wind shook the trees. I shivered and checked my weather app. My phone was down to one bar. “Jade?” I came back inside, taking care to double-bolt the huge door. “Did you know about a snowstorm coming?”
“It’s Tahoe. Sometimes it snows. Dad said not until Sunday.” She looked out the window. “It won’t be much. Not in October. It will probably just be freezing rain.”
“Oliver would have said, right, if it was going to snow badly, like left special instructions, or warned us?”
“He wouldn’t leave us here if he thought we’d be in any danger. Stop worrying. It’s a ski cabin, built for snow. Anyway, he’ll be back in the morning.” Jade checked her watch, like it would tell her the exact time he’d be back. “Like twelve hours.”
“You make it sound like he’s coming back alone.”
“No. I didn’t mean…” Jade looked startled by my suggestion.
“I know.” She was probably counting down the minutes until it was over too. I picked up my backpack and took it downstairs.
The cabin was built into the side of a hill. From the front it looked like a cozy one-story place. But beneath the entrance floor, with the open-plan living area—dining, lounge and kitchen, and observation deck—was the downstairs floor, and it was enormous.
Huge
windows looked out onto the surrounding wilderness. There was a den with a deep blue sectional and an enormous TV. To the left of the door was a corridor leading to the bedrooms.
I wandered along, looking into each bedroom.
I threw my backpack onto the bed in the last room at the end of the hallway. I figured since it didn’t have a king-sized bed strewn with abandoned outfits, or a neat pile of Tahoe nature guides and AP textbooks on the bedside table, this room devoid of any personality had to be mine—the guest room. Perfect for temporary visitors.
Our whole apartment building could fit into the space of that one cabin, and this was just their vacation house. It wasn’t even where I’d be living. According to Mum, that would be in a gorgeous Craftsman home in Menlo Park. It all seemed so unreal. I felt dizzy for a second. Pinpricks of light glittered before my eyes.
So much space for only two people, but originally it would have been for three. Her sparkling eyes gazed out from the family photos dotting the walls—at the beach, in the forest, at the top of the Empire State Building—Jade’s mum, looking like Beyoncé’s long-lost sister, beautiful and confident. Oliver had a smooth, bald head even then, and there was bright-eyed, dimple-cheeked mini Jade. They leaned into each other, faces shining with happiness.
Jade had lost someone too. Her mom died when she was young, but not too young to remember. Our only commonality—a weight of sadness clinging to us like shadows.
We hope you are enjoying the book so far. To continue reading...
Copyright © 2024 All Rights Reserved
Please log in to recommend or discuss...
