Only Her Desire. . . After losing his wife in childbirth, Colin Barrett, Duke of Northrop, does not trust healers. So when he discovers Selina White cleansing his home, he is livid. As duke, Colin is accustomed to his charges taking orders from him. But the fiery Selina has the audacity to defy him when he asks her to leave his lands. More infuriating, he cannot stop thinking about the seductive sway of her hips when she walks. Can Heal His Heart. . . The sick tenants of Northrop Park depend on Selina, and she's not about to let a man tell her she must leave her village--even if he is a duke. And while Selina does not fear Colin's temper, she is afraid of the secrets she keeps from him and of the desire he sets off in her every time he is near. Praise for the novels of Christie Kelley "A passionate and sexually charged tale. . ." -- Romantic Times Book Reviews on One Night Scandal "A sexy Cinderella story--racy and romantic!" --Anna Campbell on Scandal of the Season "Rollicking, sexy. . .you'll enjoy this one!" --Kat Martin on Every Time We Kiss "Kelley joins the ranks of Cheryl Holt, Pamela Britton and Lisa Kleypas." -- Romantic Times Book Reviews on Every Night I'm Yours 78,200 Words
Release date:
December 1, 2012
Publisher:
eOriginals
Print pages:
292
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Selina White paused before the Duke of Northrop’s bedchamber. What was it about this room that made her tremble? She had put off this bedroom for last, even though it needed her attention the most. Slowly, she opened the door to the duke’s bedchamber and slipped inside the room.
She closed her eyes for a moment to adjust to the darkness before blinking them open again. Why hadn’t the servants opened the curtains in here? The duke should be arriving within the next few hours. She felt around until she found a small table. She placed her cleansing bowl on the table determined to lighten the room so she could finish her job.
Slowly she walked toward the windows and the bright sunlight that would assist her. Pulling back the heavy velvet curtains, she sighed as the vast beauty of Northrop Park opened before her. As she took in the view, a loud groan forced her gaze to the large bed.
“Bloody hell, I told Roberts no one was to disturb me until noon!”
Selina gasped and turned away from the window to stare at the man in the duke’s bed. His large hands rubbed at his eyes. His tousled black hair needed a good brushing. But as his hands moved away from his face, she felt pierced by his icy blue eyes. She’d only met him one other time, but she would never forget those eyes.
“Who are you? One of the new servants?”
She almost laughed at the idea of any new servants being hired for this crumbling estate. The average age of the servants was sixty. “No, Your Grace.”
He groaned and sat up against the pillows at the headboard.
He looked like the drunken degenerate she’d heard stories of for the past few years. Mrs. Roberts always disavowed those claims of the duke being nothing but a worthless reprobate, maintaining that as much as he’d loved his late wife, he could never act in such a manner. Selina doubted Mrs. Roberts’s assertions. Even now, he didn’t attempt to hide his naked chest. And she couldn’t seem to look away, even though she knew she should. Broad shoulders melded into a strong chest lightly covered with black hair. Her fingers twitched as if they wanted to feel the sensation of his warm skin.
She must be mad!
“Have you completely lost your tongue, girl?”
“I’m not a servant, Your Grace.”
He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headboard. “Did Thomas send you?”
Thomas? “I have no idea to whom you are referring.”
“My brother. Did he pay you to join me in my bedchamber?”
She clutched the small chair near her to keep her knees from giving out. “You think someone paid me to be your whore!”
The duke shook his head. “It wouldn’t be the first time.”
“Perhaps not for you, but it would be for me.”
“Indeed?” he said with a coarse laugh. “You enter my room with your hair unbound and your dress cut down to your breasts and I’m supposed to believe you are an innocent angel?”
“I would never do such a thing!” She stole a quick glance down at the bodice of her dress. The man was mad, the gown completely covered her breasts.
“I’ve never met a woman who wouldn’t do anything for the right price.”
“Well, now you have. And I don’t care what you believe about me or any other woman.” She strode toward the table where she’d set her cleansing bowl.
“Do not leave this room until you tell me who you are and why you are in my bedchamber,” he demanded.
The cold tone of his voice stopped her feet. Her mother had warned her to stay away from the house when the master was at home. Selina knew he’d hated her mother, but she never assumed his disgust would carry down to all women.
He shouldn’t even be here yet. She’d been certain she could finish the herbal cleansing of the house before he arrived later today. Obviously, he arrived late last night.
“Who are you?” He started to move the coverlet off his body as if he meant to stand.
“Please don’t get up,” she said quickly. The last thing she wanted to see was his naked body. Although, it might prove quite interesting. No! She couldn’t think of him that way. Absolutely not the duke. “Miss White, Your Grace.”
“Miss White?” He paused and a dark scowl formed.
She only nodded.
“The wise woman’s daughter? Why are you here and not your mother?”
“My mother passed on a few years ago.”
“Bloody hell. Based on the smell of sage I can only assume you have taken up her practices?”
“Of course. Who else will tend to the sick on your estate?”
“There is no one sick here. I also happen to know there is a completely qualified physician in town.”
“Qualified?” Selina snorted. “Qualified as a rotten sod. The man is incompetent to practice medicine.”
“The man is highly educated and trained. Now get out of my room and my house,” he said in a low voice as he pointed toward the door.
“With pleasure, Your Grace.”
Selina grabbed her bowl of burning sage and raced for the door. Once in the hall, she leaned against the wall and released a long breath as her heart pounded in her chest. The man was more dreadful than she’d expected. First assuming she was a whore and then almost standing up before her with nothing to cover himself. What an awful man.
“Miss White, you cannot go into the duke’s bedchamber.”
She looked up to see the duke’s ancient butler ambling toward her. “I know that now, Mr. Roberts.”
“You were in there?”
“No one told me he was here. Yesterday I was told he would arrive this afternoon. I assumed I would have this morning to finish.”
“That stupid fool boy,” he muttered, shaking his head. “Randall let you in this morning, didn’t he?”
“Yes.” Randall was the youngest footman in service to the duke, and everyone questioned his mental capacity. Selina’s mother had told her that he’d taken a terrible fall when only three. He’d never been the same since.
“He knew the duke arrived last night. He should have told you.” The older man leaned in closer. “Was the duke angry?”
Remembering the way the duke had looked at her when he thought she was a prostitute brought heat to her cheeks. “Of course. He tossed me out of his bedchamber.”
“Oh, dear.” Mr. Roberts twisted his hands together. “He’s been in a foul mood since he arrived. He must have seen the condition of the house last night and it upset him.”
Selina frowned. “But the estate was, and still is, his responsibility to maintain. He hasn’t sent money for the needed repairs. He should be ashamed of his actions.” Lack of action was more the term.
“Shh,” he reprimanded as he glanced back at the duke’s door. “We all know the duke has failed his responsibilities to the estate and its tenants. But you don’t want to be the one to remind him of that.”
“Someone should.”
“Perhaps. But no one with a bit of sense would dare speak of it to him.”
Selina shrugged. The duke needed someone to set him to rights. Most of the tenants were frustrated with the lack of attention their cottages received. The only thing that kept them on the estate was the generous income the duke let them retain. The fertile land provided a welcomed source of income for both the duke and the tenants.
“I fear His Grace may have taken one look at this old place and decided that having a wedding here was a dreadful idea. And if that’s true there will be no hope of getting this beautiful house restored to its former glory.”
One of the tenants had told her there was to be a wedding. She couldn’t imagine the type of woman who would marry a man like him. Then again, she’d heard the stories of women so eager for a title they would do just about anything. The woman was most likely as shallow as he. But what would possess the man to have a wedding at his most decrepit estate? The one place he hadn’t visited in eight years. “Why are they having the wedding here, Mr. Roberts? He despises this place.”
“She insisted, miss. Thought it would bring happy memories to the estate instead of the ones that haunt him.”
Selina had to agree with the bride. Perhaps now that he was getting married he would put away his rakish ways, refurbish the house, and have his children here. While that would be excellent news for the tenants, she had no desire to deliver the child of the duke.
“Did you finish the cleansing?”
“No. I still need to finish the duke’s wing up here, and then his library and study.” Her mother had always insisted the rooms used most intimately by the family should be cleansed last so they were fresh when the family arrived. Now Selina worried she might not get the chance to finish. The cleansing was one of the few rituals a wise woman still performed. Not that there were many of the women left. Generations of ridicule and threats of being labeled a witch had forced many to give up the ancient ways. Selina only knew of three other women who kept up the practices.
“What will you do?”
“I don’t know.”
“Walk with me down the stairs,” Mr. Roberts said as he glanced over at the duke’s bedchamber door again. Once downstairs, he stopped. “The duke was always a man of habit. While he hasn’t been here in years, I would still wager that he takes a morning ride at nine. If you get here by then, you should have an hour to do your cleansing.”
“But it might take me two days at that rate.”
He sent her a paternalistic smile. “Better than not finishing at all.”
“True.” But after her first encounter with the duke, she wasn’t certain she even wanted to complete the cleansing. She’d never met such an aggravating man in her life. But she knew her duty. Hopefully, she could avoid him and finish her work.
“I’ll send a stableboy to your cottage tomorrow if the duke takes his ride.”
“Thank you, Mr. Roberts.”
“No, thank you, Miss White. Where would we be without you? You take care of all us servants and the tenants too.”
She kissed his weathered cheek and headed for her cottage. Where would they be, indeed, she thought. She tended to their ills and delivered their babies. If only the duke understood how important her work was to the estate.
But she couldn’t explain it to him. After what happened eight years ago, she needed to do her best to avoid him completely. God only knew what would happen to her if he ever learned the truth.
Colin Barrett, the seventh Duke of Northrop, stared at the closed door with a scowl. How dare that woman enter his house . . . his bedchamber . . . without his permission? He tossed the coverlet off his body and reached for the trousers he’d left on the floor last night. His valet and trunks wouldn’t arrive until later in the day. Having not spent a day in this house for years, Colin was certain there was nothing in the linen press worth wearing.
After dressing, he headed for the door determined to confirm that Miss White had departed. The last thing he wanted or needed in his house was some woman who believed she held a type of mystical power or could cure all ills. No woman had such power. It was 1814; medicine belonged in the hands of educated men.
He’d returned to this house to take back control of his life. And he would start with that blasted wise woman.
“Roberts!” he shouted. Without waiting for an answer, he trudged downstairs. “Roberts!”
“I am here, Your Grace,” he said from the salon.
“Did you allow that woman entrance to my home?”
Red tinged the older man’s cheeks. “What woman do you mean, Your Grace?”
“That bloody wise woman!”
Roberts furrowed his brow as if in thought. “I did, Your Grace. Should I not have?”
Colin clenched his fists. “No, you shouldn’t have let her inside my home without my permission.”
“I do apologize, Your Grace. I assure you I shall endeavor never to let a woman like her in your home again.”
Colin paused for a moment at the butler’s odd choice of words. He shook his head. “Very well, then. Where is she now?”
“Now?”
“Yes, now. Did she leave?”
“Of course, Your Grace. I believe she was on her way to her home.”
Colin sighed. “And which direction would that be, Roberts?”
“East, Your Grace.”
“Thank you.” Colin rushed out the door, intent on catching her. He walked quickly down the worn path toward the tenants’ homes. A figure up ahead caught his eyes. She maintained a slow, easy gait as if she hadn’t a care. She glanced around and then paused for a moment to breathe in the fragrance of a flower. Once she resumed her walk, her long, curly, blond hair blew in the breeze. He couldn’t help but notice the way her hips swayed under her blue muslin skirts. God, he shouldn’t be noticing that. Especially not with her.
“Miss White!” he yelled out.
She turned her head and then quickly walked inside one of the cottages.
Colin stopped for a moment. She’d heard him and yet continued on as if she hadn’t. The nerve of that insolent girl! No man or woman ignored him. He strode ahead until he came to the cottage she’d walked into. Without a thought, he entered the house.
“Miss . . .” his voice trailed off as he realized his mistake. Seeing the multitude of dishes on the table and the children playing on the floor, he knew this was not Miss White’s home.
“Yer Grace,” a large woman said with a quick curtsy. She walked toward him with a deep frown and her lips pressed into a thin line. “W-Welcome to my home.”
Oh, good God. He had no idea who this woman was. “Thank you, Mrs. . . .”
“Godwin, Yer Grace. My husband works the land for ye.”
He wondered briefly at the cold tone of her voice. “Of course.”
Glancing about the room, he wondered where Miss White had disappeared. “Pray excuse me, madam. I was looking for Miss White. I thought I saw her enter this cottage. I must admit, I thought this was her home.”
The woman laughed soundly. “She is tending my five-year-old, Yer Grace. He got a nasty bee sting yesterday.”
Why would the wise woman care about a child’s bee sting? He’d been stung a few times as a child and nothing happened. A long silence stretched out.
“Very good, then. I shall wait outside,” Colin finally said. He walked outside and waited for Miss White to emerge. As he leaned against a tree, he had to admit that Mrs. Godwin’s attitude seemed quite odd. She hadn’t even offered him tea, or the chance to wait for Miss White inside. Perhaps she was preoccupied with the children.
After almost an hour, Miss White finally opened the door.
“Good Lord, you’re still here,” she muttered as she noticed him standing by a tree.
“You must have known I was out here waiting for you.” She’d deliberately kept him cooling his heels. Did this woman not realize who he was?
She shook her head. “I’d hoped you would grow bored with the wait.” She took a step down the path as if their conversation had finished.
“I need a word with you, Miss White.”
She rolled her green eyes and then turned her back to him. “Indeed. I do hope you shall attempt to keep your clothes on this time.”
Colin walked closer to her as his fury ignited. The woman was walking around with her hair unbound as if she were still a child, not to mention she had the nerve to chastise a duke! “Keep my clothes on? You entered my bedchamber unannounced and yet you criticize me on good form?”
“You arrived early.”
“Which has nothing to do with you being in my bedroom.”
“What do you wish to speak to me about, Your Grace?” she asked with a sigh.
What did he want to speak with her about? He could not remember. There had to be a reasonable explanation for following her and then waiting for nearly an hour. “What were you doing in the cottage?”
That was not what he wanted to know. Dammit! This little hoyden had disturbed his thought process.
“Little Raymond was stung by a bee yesterday. I was just making certain everything was all right with him. His brother died of a bee sting a few years ago.”
A bee sting could kill a person? He’d never heard of such nonsense. “Was he all right?”
“Yes. The mark is still a little red but he shall be just fine.”
“Excellent.”
An uncomfortable silence filled the air around them. He had no idea how to broach the subject. “Miss White, I do hope you understand—”
“Of course, Your Grace. You did not expect someone to disturb your peace while you slept. It is completely reasonable that you might have been irritable this morning.”
Did she actually think his petulance had something to do with lack of sleep? “I believe you misunderstand me, Miss White.”
“Oh?”
“I don’t want you here,” he said quietly. Shame heated his cheeks. But he had no reason for embarrassment. Her mother, with her assorted herbs and nonsense, had caused his sorrow. Colin had never thought that the dreadful woman’s daughter would still be here on the estate. As Kate had told him, it was time to grow up and take charge of his life. It was strange to hear such a mature speech from a woman ten years younger than him.
“I understand, Your Grace. I shall stay away from your bedchamber.” She started to walk away again.
“Miss White,” he called out.
She stopped and looked back at him. “Are we not finished, Your Grace?”
“No.” He waited until she turned to face him. “I don’t want you in my home.”
“Very well,” she replied tightly.
“I also don’t want you here any longer.”
Her mouth dropped open. “I don’t believe I understand, Your Grace.”
“I wish for you to leave your cottage while I’m here.”
“Leave?” she repeated.
“Yes. I’m quite certain you realize why I would like you to depart. I’m not asking you to leave Northrop Park permanently, only until after the wedding. Obviously, the tenants appreciate your work here. But I . . .” Dear God, she had him babbling like an idiot! “I don’t want the reminder of what happened.”
“My being here or not being here will not change your memories, Your Grace. The only one who can do that is you.”
Colin felt his anger stir again. “It matters not. I do not want the remembrance of what happened here. And you are only a reminder of that pain. Do you understand?”
“Yes. I believe I do.”
“Very well, then.” He turned away believing everything was settled. She would leave and perhaps he might be able to stand living on the estate for the next two months until the wedding was over.
But as he looked up at the ancient house, all the painful memories returned.
As Selina strode away from the irksome duke, she couldn’t help but glance back at him. She’d be damned if she let him chase her from her home. She had two women about ready to deliver, an elderly man who was losing his mind, and a woman sick with the wasting disease. Nothing and no one would keep her from doing her job.
Not even the Duke of Northrop.
Colin walked through the house the next morning, frustrated by the condition of his ancestral home. Wallpaper was pulling away from the walls, the rugs were threadbare and covered in dust, and, based on the buckets on the third floor, he assumed there were leaks in the roof. He blew out a long breath. This was his fault. Guilt spread over him as he walked toward his study.
He had no one to blame but himself for the dreadful state of disrepair. His steward had informed him of the needed repairs but he’d ignored those letters. He’d wanted no reminders of this place. Being here now brought back all the horrific memories.
How could he have returned to this godforsaken place? Even now, he felt on edge. He’d spent most of yesterday out of the house, unable to face the memories that remained locked in these walls. It was as if it had only been a few days, not years since that March night.
Already, it felt as if the house was closing in on him. He could still hear her screams of agony, and her pleas with God to save their baby. He entered his study and his gaze focused on Mary’s portrait above the fireplace. She’d been stunningly beautiful with her auburn hair and blue eyes. The longer he stared at her picture, the more his guilt ate at him. He had to get out of here . . . out of this damned house.
He should have insisted the wedding take place in London.
“Roberts,” he shouted, “tell Mr. Sellers I want a horse saddled.”
“Yes, Your Grace.” Roberts replied from the hall.
Colin paced his room. Dust and cobwebs covered every table and corner. Of course, if he had sent more notice of his impending arrival, the house would have been immaculate. Or at least as immaculate as his elderly staff could make the decrepit place. He needed to hire more staff as quickly as possible. And workers too. The house needn’t be perfect but at least respectable enough for the wedding.
It was only two months. Then everything would be fine and he could return to London. Then he would never come back to this godforsaken house again. He’d let it rot until the next duke took over. His brother, Thomas, or Thomas’s son, Richard, could handle the renovations it would need then.
He strode from the room and the house to escape the memories that plagued him. A ride would ease his mind. Once he reached the stables, a fine mare was waiting for him. At least his stables had been maintained.
“Thank you, Mr. Sellers.” He mounted and took the reins from the groomsman.
“Thank you, Your Grace. Aphrodite needed s. . .
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